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Al Overy		Pugsly immediately regretted starting the Zoom chat with his parents 10 minutes early. 10/12/21 12:00:41	16

Dave Bryan		🎵 It's my party and I'll lie if I want to 🎵 09/12/21 8:51:27	1 16
Everyone knows that Allegra has goneShe duly wept for her crimeWhy were they holding a bashWith cheese and presents and wine? --Glad You Remember
Vivvy En		"I'll have to go, I'm out of lolly." 05/12/21 8:05:07	16

Tony S		I'm not saying Lord Snootingdon has a large estate but when he tells his dog to fetch his slippers.... 03/12/21 20:18:25	16

stoneface1		"So I took two fish and five loaves and fed five thousand people." "Well I take really cheap end chicken, cover it in this dust crap I call my secret recipe, and sell it to millions of people a day." "Now that is a miracle." 02/12/21 8:02:31	16

Dan Nicholls		Billy Elliott: The Midlife Crisis 27/11/21 8:05:35	16

John Llamas		clever “Ahhh Tony, l remember when I was young catching crabs on this beach..” “You’ve got no worries on that front now Hatty” 25/11/21 12:06:07	16

C CaMel		#ding dong# “Will the owner of a large black horse please move your vehicle, it’s doing a massive shit by the photo booth, Thank you.” 22/11/21 8:29:24	16

Stephen Bean		"According to my calculations you've spent 43 hours on caption.me this week. What have you got to say for yourself Dave?" "Have you seen how many votes I have?" 20/11/21 9:06:50	2 16
Only 43 hours? I thought it was more. --Dave Bryan
Al Overy		"Do they normally play with those?" Sigh "Always." 19/11/21 21:13:49	16

James Lennox		lol x2 "Ma'am, I'd like to help fix your flat tyre, but I believe travelling alone in a high octane 6.2 litre V8 truck, when you could be driving a small electric vehicle, carpooling, or using public transport, is totally irresponsible and endangers the very planet we live on." "I'll show you my boobs." "Where's your jack?" 18/11/21 13:17:02	2 16
I'll show you mine if you show me yours. --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		The previous version had cauliflower ears. 13/11/21 8:32:21	16

Vanessa the Guesser		clever Today's rail replacement will be a Double Decker. 23/10/21 11:29:47	2 16
And it's better for the environment than going by Aero-plane. --Glad You Remember
Al Overy		The Furred Reich 22/10/21 19:00:09	1 16
Looking at this again, I have an urge to travel back in time and help that cat to succeed as an artist. --Glad You Remember
Michael Winner		Electrocute. 20/10/21 7:06:16	16

James Lennox		"Oh hell, not again. I wish your mother would tell me when she's pregnant." 19/10/21 7:20:26	16

Chris Keegan		Hi all, So many thanks for attending our first ever get together, it was fantastic to actually meet all of you. Framed prints of the attached are available online, please note there is an additional charge of £2 for the colour option. All the best, Chris Beach. 18/10/21 19:00:24	16

C CaMel		“You may have a sore arm for a few days madam, and so will I.” 14/10/21 7:19:21	16

Mr Dome		Ironically it turns out my hamster has a nut allergy 20/09/21 12:58:25	16

James Lennox		"Cut! This isn't working. Maybe we should try that laser sword idea after all?" 12/09/21 19:56:53	16

Tony S		clever "So what's the situation with the kid stuck in the vending machine?" "No change." 11/09/21 7:31:13	16

Al Overy		"U F.O." "That's my boy! You tell him!" 10/09/21 7:00:39	1 16
I'd guess the Dad hasn't seen what happened to the White House in Independence Day, but they should be fairly safe, he is carrying Damien from The Omen. --Glyn Evans
James Lennox		lol creative Users have been experiencing weird error messages when trying to vote for certain captions. To help identify the problem, please try voting for this test caption. [admin@caption.me.nigeria] 26/08/21 20:20:59	2 16
You won't fool me, I'm posting anonymously. The only thing I trust people from Nigeria with is my bank account number. [anon] --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		"Sarge! I think we've found where the clown's buried..." 25/08/21 11:11:52	16

Ian Skelding		Atomic Kitten 18/08/21 19:00:46	16

James Lennox		"What are you celebrating?" "Breathing!" 12/08/21 7:05:59	1 16
Having got through Covid, I can identify with that. --Molly R
Michael Winner		creative clever x2 "I've had it with these mtherfucking babies on this mtherfucking plain." 09/08/21 19:27:15	5 16
It's based on a line from "Snakes on a Plane", John: "I've had it with these motherfuckin' snakes on this motherfuckin' plane!"Interestingly, the movie was hyped up big time thanks to Samuel L. Jackson refusing to follow studio... --James Lennox
Vanessa the Guesser		She's a real church goer. 26/07/21 19:00:15	16

Michael Winner		After 1936, the Olympics committee removed the Hitler-salute-o-hurdle event. 04/07/21 11:00:10	2 16
It was heily irregular. --Al Overy
Vivvy En		"Here's some cream for it." 25/06/21 19:03:42	16

Troompa Loompa		"But then I'll have nothing to play a round with." 13/06/21 19:06:52	1 16

Mark Wilson		lol I don't fancy their chances of making it across the English Channel in that. 12/06/21 7:25:59	16

The Wolf		"Yes, I'll bring you a toilet roll, but next time can you text me instead of using Zoom?" 03/06/21 11:04:23	16

Vanessa the Guesser		"I think we're being followed by The Three Little Pigs." 31/05/21 19:24:32	16

Vanessa the Guesser		He'd never been the same since the split. 30/05/21 19:00:15	16

Ellen Duncalf		Can't pay nursing home fees? We'll take them away. Reasonable fees. Phone 01244 321546. 29/05/21 11:03:06	4 16
FFS that number is not recognised!! What a waste of my time --Mr Dome
Dave Bryan		''We had to abandon the race. When the greyhounds saw him they wouldn't come out of the traps.'' 29/05/21 7:03:15	2 16
Simple fix: put him behind the greyhounds. --Willie Johnson
Crunchy Chords
	23/05/21 19:00:25		1 16
How urgent are we talking here? Would calling 101 be better? --Glyn Evans
Dave Bryan		''E = mc2. I've cracked it!'' 21/05/21 19:00:09	16

Ian Skelding		Brad was trying to portray the fun, lighter side of the KKK. 21/05/21 12:00:55	16

Mark England		clever In every town on a Sunday morning, you will always see pigeons, pecking away at a discarded Chinese. 19/05/21 11:06:19	16

Ian Skelding		"What do you mean making me the Goalkeeper would be cheating?" 15/05/21 7:00:09	16

The Wolf		lol "So what treatments have you decided to go for?" "Flea and worm. You?" 13/05/21 11:28:11	2 16

Dave Bryan		''I'm booking you.......for the Inspector's stag do.'' 10/05/21 19:30:05	16

Dave Bryan		The captioneers' keep fit group meets every morning at 8.00am. 10/05/21 7:09:10	1 16
Mental gymnastics. --Willie Johnson
Dave Bryan		She is obviously not in favour of PC. 09/05/21 7:00:09	16

Al Overy		clever Today, Sesame Street is brought to you by the letters A, K and the number 47. 04/05/21 11:00:59	1 16

stone face		On her new single, Icelandic popstar, Bjork, duets with a camel. "It was really tough, getting my voice to blend in with the tuneless, guttural grunting. But am really pleased with the result." Said the camel. 04/05/21 7:01:17	1 16
Bjork you say? I was almost certain it was a young Maria Muldaur. --SnapDragon D
Ian Skelding		"She's out cold." 01/05/21 19:38:25	16

Mark Wilson		That's him Dad, he's the frog that threatened me 30/04/21 11:07:57	1 16
"It's alright son, that scorpion's already sorted him out" --Glyn Evans
stone face		clever One airline goes all the way. 26/04/21 7:03:42	1 16
And the other one (ironically?) has a layover. --Willie Johnson
Troompa Loompa		After the crucifixion, Jesus varnished for 3 days before his resurrection. 23/04/21 11:29:06	1 16
He took a real shellacking. Everybody thought he was finished. --Willie Johnson
Hercules Rockefeller		"What? The weatherman said to dress for the mid 70's today." 22/04/21 19:09:13	16

John Glover		"What do you mean, 'it's my weekend to have him', I'm in the middle of a bloody game!" 21/04/21 11:17:08	1 16
"Either way, you're not going to score." --Willie Johnson
Vivvy En		lol "You really should see a vet about that conjunctivitis." 20/04/21 13:08:41	16

Troompa Loompa		clever 🎵 S.W.A.L.K. like an Egyptian...🎵 20/04/21 7:50:34	1 16
How did I miss this? Great caption :-) --Nina Dutton
James Lennox		"Here's five bucks kid," said Tina from Doncaster. "It's been a while." 17/04/21 19:58:08	16

Vanessa the Guesser		She thought he was a good catch. 13/04/21 19:00:19	1 16
He'll do in a pinch. --Willie Johnson
Troompa Loompa		Club 18-30...stone 13/04/21 11:06:48	16

Karen Oakenfull		lol "What do you mean go faster? I'm ninety f*cking seven you ungrateful hag." 12/04/21 7:36:41	16

Mark Wilson		lol Tina had just been run over by a car, but just when she thought her day couldn't get any worse.. 12/04/21 7:12:07	16

Dave Bryan		clever ''Where are you?'' ''Outside the Black Boy Hotel, Sarge.'' ''Don't try and be funny, Constable. Just call it the police station.'' 05/04/21 11:17:11	7 16
I almost want to give you a supervote for this one, but it's too close to a painful truth (which isn't funny). --Willie Johnson
Stephen Paterson		lol There was no mention of this on the SunLife advert!? 04/04/21 19:36:52	16

Tony S		And Weight Watchers slimmer of the year award goes to... 03/04/21 11:03:33	16

Dave Bryan		''I only bought the jumper three months ago and it's already too small for him. Kids grow up so quick these days.'' 31/03/21 19:24:28	16

The Wolf		"I don't know about you, but this is the only place I feel safe from Covid" "Yeah, me too"...cough 31/03/21 11:35:42	7 16
That's a "tasteless" joke. --Willie Johnson
Tony S		Just do it I can't Just press the bloody thing I know I should but I can't do it Just do it But the vote will knock my caption off the top. 30/03/21 19:32:27	16

Stephen Bean		Nescafé Ghouled Blend 28/03/21 7:00:10	16

Vanessa the Guesser		Eskimower 27/03/21 20:01:01	16

The Wolf		lol "Yep, that's definitely dog shit" 25/03/21 12:00:06	1 16
"No it's not, I told you to pull my finger and look what's happened. Now you'll have to deal with the fallout." --Willie Johnson
Willie Johnson		Wanted: Photographer. Part time hours. Must be flexible. 23/03/21 13:40:23	16

Karyn Harrison		A pig and a poke. 12/03/21 12:30:28	2 16
That must mean Dave's surname is Cameron. --Troompa Loompa
The Wolf		"Dave, when I asked you to bring protection..." 12/03/21 12:00:19	16

The Wolf		"Take my word for it, Donald. It's just not worth buying cheap toilet roll" 10/03/21 12:15:55	1 16
Not unless you can use half the roll for every wipe. --Willie Johnson
Stu Dent		Pop Art 08/03/21 20:00:08	16

James Lennox		"🎵 Karma, karma, karma, karma, karma chamele..." "Stop it." 06/03/21 20:00:44	1 16
Stop it, it's bad karma. --Willie Johnson
James Lennox		It was Alvin's coke habit that caused the band to break up. 04/03/21 20:13:45	16

Molly R		lol "Yes, he's my pet millipede, Martin. He goes everywhere with me." 04/03/21 12:00:10	16

The Wolf		"I hope you don't think I'm being rude, but who are you?" 02/03/21 12:04:17	16

Charles Gilbert		Funding your child's University expenses can't start early enough. 27/02/21 20:08:30	16

Troompa Loompa		Harry & Meghan's next baby. 27/02/21 20:00:11	16

Vivvy En		"Who lives there?" "A stuck up cow." 16/02/21 20:00:25	16

Vanessa the Guesser		"Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..." "Good Morning, Lockjaw Helpline, Trudy speaking, how may I help?" 16/02/21 8:16:15	16

Tony Edwards		lol They have been inseparable since they met on a package holiday. 07/02/21 12:12:20	16

stone face		"You tell him he was adopted." 06/02/21 20:09:49	16

Chris Keegan		lol I spent most of the 80's listening to The Wall. 06/02/21 18:33:44	9 16
I preferred listening to the Doors. --Karyn Harrison
Stephen Bean		clever The Tête Gallery 02/02/21 23:11:10	16

James Lennox		lol Bloody Royal Mail. You post something 65 million years in advance and it still arrives a month late. 25/01/21 12:59:28	1 16

The Wolf		Weatheredspoons 24/01/21 12:03:13	1 16
out back... witheredpoons --Mauris Iocus
Tony S		lol After the serious acting roles dried up Skippys decline into porn films was a sad sight. 22/01/21 8:03:28	16

The Wolf		I tried to get a semi up there once but my wife said no chance. 16/01/21 20:06:44	16

Dave Bryan		lol ''Who are those f-cking wierdos?'' ''They're captioneers, Fester.'' 15/01/21 20:23:27	1 16
Some of their captions are festering... --Mauris Iocus
Ian Skelding		The late ex President. 13/01/21 8:41:26	16

Al Overy		"Are you kidding me? NO! You can't have your boomerang back!" 09/01/21 8:00:13	16

Stephen Bean		"I told you not to lick my arse." 03/01/21 20:00:28	1 16
''I didn't realise you were being serious. I thought you were saying it tongue in cheek.'' --Dave Bryan
Troompa Loompa		Diary of a Blimpy Kid 03/01/21 10:44:22	16

James Lennox		lol x2 This takes me back to the old days before internet porn, when the centrespread in National Geographic would have to suffice. 17/12/20 20:34:15	16

Chris Keegan		"What was the sell by date on those eggs love?" 04/12/20 12:09:49	1 16
"Don't worry, we've still got two days left." --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		"She's a lazy bitch, smells of wee and drinks out the toilet. But she can just about keep up with me if she leans on the buggy", said Ted. 29/11/20 20:00:19	16

Hercules Rockefeller		"Mind if I crash at your place?" 28/11/20 12:01:25	1 16
"Knock yourself out." --Willie Johnson

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