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The Wolf
signed up: 1 year, 9 months ago
profile viewed: 2 time(s) this week
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Cheers James. Next week, how your middle toe can be useful when camping
10:59pm
comment on caption:
Being married to a man with a 2-metre arm certainly has its perks. Tasks like taking selfies, changing light bulbs, and reaching the bread with the best sell by date in the supermarket are easy, and of course he is an amazing Basketball player. Wiping his bum though, that is an issue. I have to do that. [The Wolf]
James (and caption author) I think you're missing something. When wiping one's bum, there is little reason to bend the elbow much since the length of the arm approximates the distance between the shoulder and bum. If you consider a triangle formed by the distance between the shoulder and bum as one side, and the other two sides formed by the forearm and upper arm and the elbow forming one angle of the triangle, the bend of the elbow is an obtuse angle thus forming an obtuse triangle. When the arm is longer and the shoulder-to-bum side is the same and the arm forming the other two sides is longer, it merely takes a bigger bend of the elbow to accomplish the triangle, which then becomes an acute triangle and thus wipeage of the bum is accomplishable as long as the the two segments of the arm are of similar length.
* This comment was created in 108 degree weather with a semi-functioning air conditioner. Once it cools, I may read it and wonder wtf I was thinking. Your results may vary.
11:09pm
comment on caption:
Being married to a man with a 2-metre arm certainly has its perks. Tasks like taking selfies, changing light bulbs, and reaching the bread with the best sell by date in the supermarket are easy, and of course he is an amazing Basketball player. Wiping his bum though, that is an issue. I have to do that. [The Wolf]
True Willie, however, the average width of a room or cubicle containing a toilet is 113cm, and the average distance from a male shoulder to their anus is 72cm. By Pythagoras we can establish that a man with 200cm long arms, but otherwise normal proportions, would require elbow room of at least 93cm in order to wipe their arse, much more than the 56.5cm available on average.
Even allowing for a 45 degree rotation backward or forward (depending on whether the male in question is a round the back, or through the legs wiper) the distance from anus to wall would only measure 80cm, still less than required.
DISCLAIMER: Figures are fictional, and the maths is probably wrong.
11:44pm
comment on caption:
Being married to a man with a 2-metre arm certainly has its perks. Tasks like taking selfies, changing light bulbs, and reaching the bread with the best sell by date in the supermarket are easy, and of course he is an amazing Basketball player. Wiping his bum though, that is an issue. I have to do that. [The Wolf]
''Anon.''
9:00pm
comment on caption:
"So, who's your favourite captioneer?" [The Wolf]
The classless end of Edinburgh.
2:48pm
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"Dave, a woman has just been sick outside Wetherspoons on George Street. Get the rest of the family. We're eating out tonight" [The Wolf]
He's gained more shade.
1:10pm
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These bloody doctors don't know anything. "Get more exercise", he said, and "take the dog out for walks more often". It's been a month now and I still haven't lost any weight... [The Wolf]
Time Travelling Diary Day 2.
I appear to have killed everyone by infecting them with Covid-19.
12:50pm
comment on caption:
Time travelling diary. Day 1.
After making it back to the 1940s, I hid the time machine and checked into a local guesthouse. The ladies there were incredible friendly and accommodating. Reality soon kicked in though when I wanted to check Instagram and I asked them if they had wireless... [The Wolf]
👍
7:47am
comment on caption:
It's not often that you get a thumbs up from anon. [The Wolf]
"This increases the cost of your order by £3.75"
1:09pm
comment on caption:
Dear Mr Wibble. We're writing to you in regard to your Tesco delivery order. Unfortunately, the 4 pack of Tesco toilet paper that you ordered is currently out of stock. We have substituted this item with a 9 pack of Andrex Quilted. [The Wolf]
Lol 😁
2:26pm
comment on caption:
Dear Mr Wibble. We're writing to you in regard to your Tesco delivery order. Unfortunately, the 4 pack of Tesco toilet paper that you ordered is currently out of stock. We have substituted this item with a 9 pack of Andrex Quilted. [The Wolf]