| This Week | Last Week | All Time | |||||||
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| Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | |
| Captions | 5 | 15 | #4 | 49 | 124 | #4 | 2313 | 4226 | #35 |
| Comments | 4 | 3 | #8 | 4 | 3 | #8 | 259 | 105 | #31 |
| Forum Posts | 17 | 155 | |||||||
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Stephen Bean
signed up: 1 year ago
profile viewed: 6 time(s) this week
caption quota: 54
votes given since joining: 1,514
super vote quota: 0
I love seeing captions that make me smile and laugh.
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captions
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07/10/18 12:00:09 |
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04/10/19 20:02:43 |
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Mythical beast world championship result: 02/07/19 12:00:14 |
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Lol --sandeep chahal
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18/03/19 8:00:04 |
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Be careful not to annoy them. They might fly off the handle. 04/04/19 8:26:24 |
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NASA unveil the new rover for their next moon landing. 22/03/19 12:29:53 |
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Right so you could be my Auntie Edna or my Uncle Harold or even Chirpy my pet budgie .. --stone face
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Scientists attempt to calculate what a woman really means when she says she's 'fine'. 14/03/19 20:05:54 |
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08/01/19 12:00:04 |
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16/09/19 8:00:04 |
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04/09/19 8:09:03 |
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Always slice a cucumber before feeding to your tortoise. 23/11/18 21:52:32 |
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There’s big bucks in the fashion industry. 30/10/18 8:08:30 |
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Young people don't respect their elders anymore. 27/09/19 9:19:02 |
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23/07/19 20:00:14 |
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16/07/19 12:00:04 |
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10/07/19 8:09:18 |
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Jesus figured selling selfies on ebay would make him a prophet. 07/05/19 12:02:50 |
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03/05/19 12:02:24 |
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07/02/19 20:00:05 |
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12/01/19 12:00:04 |
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25/09/19 8:20:33 |
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Til death do us-- --Scrijjy Doo
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"I think my sex addiction's cured." 15/09/19 12:23:30 |
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30/07/19 8:00:32 |
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31/05/19 12:00:16 |
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18/05/19 8:00:03 |
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16/05/19 8:00:03 |
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Glad it's not just me that struggles with a Toblerone. 14/04/19 12:14:01 |
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That's cool well done - I love toblerone wish I could find one that big --BAD BOY DENNIS *
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28/11/18 12:01:09 |
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03/10/18 20:00:29 |
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28/08/19 20:09:03 |
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12/06/19 8:00:04 |
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13/05/19 20:00:03 |
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12/05/19 20:00:05 |
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26/04/19 8:00:15 |
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16/04/19 12:00:05 |
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20/03/19 12:00:06 |
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Yeah couldn't agree more James, great caption. --The Wolf
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25/02/19 8:00:26 |
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08/01/19 8:00:05 |
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When a caption appears after a few seconds it will probably have been prepared in advance rather than be the result of ''speed and cleverness''. The lucky captioneer will simply be the one who downloads it the quickest. As Karyn points out, it... --Dave Bryan
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26/12/18 20:00:06 |
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"Please officer, can you let me off? It’s my birthday tomorrow." 24/12/18 12:52:15 |
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Rambo’s mission was to shoot the country’s monarch. 10/12/18 8:39:10 |
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13/11/18 20:01:06 |
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Nod to https://www.caption.me/356778https://www.caption.me/277138https://www.caption.me/63354 --Funny Bean
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26/09/19 8:00:15 |
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17/09/19 8:06:41 |
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14/09/19 12:00:03 |
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01/09/19 8:35:26 |
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"He reacts like this every time we go to a filling station." 01/08/19 12:00:18 |
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"Jesus Dave, stop giving the mannequins blueberry juice. They keep pissing on the floor." 15/07/19 12:37:26 |
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"Now we can have as much cake as we like!" 20/06/19 12:17:08 |
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17/06/19 20:00:11 |
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Ha ha, just pipped me to it. --Troompa Loompa
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"Sh*t, what a time for the batteries in my xray glasses to run out." 09/06/19 8:01:49 |
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29/05/19 12:00:13 |
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"I’m crap at following instructions from Ikea." 21/04/19 8:41:48 |
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12/04/19 12:05:07 |
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"I've been staring at this photo for 20 minutes... Just noticed the cat." 02/04/19 12:02:50 |
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15/03/19 8:00:06 |
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08/03/19 20:00:03 |
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17/02/19 20:00:06 |
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31/12/18 8:02:11 |
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25/12/18 20:16:21 |
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03/10/19 20:01:30 |
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13/09/19 12:35:28 |
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14/08/19 12:57:44 |
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29/06/19 12:20:08 |
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17/06/19 8:28:53 |
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15/06/19 9:14:08 |
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"Ok, there's my nan. Remember to tell her we've 06/05/19 9:05:10 |
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He's making a Mastiff mistake. 01/05/19 13:00:02 |
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"You should've seen my goatee." 18/03/19 12:01:05 |
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Looks like size does matter when it comes to attracting birds. 15/03/19 22:42:30 |
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09/02/19 12:00:04 |
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02/01/19 8:23:23 |
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31/12/18 12:00:04 |
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When cleaning an elephant enclosure, always keep your vizor down. 08/12/18 10:02:52 |
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04/11/18 12:11:14 |
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04/10/19 8:00:12 |
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30/09/19 12:04:37 |
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"I'd love to wipe that smog expression off his face." 12/09/19 20:16:35 |
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09/09/19 8:04:55 |
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18/08/19 9:32:05 |
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12/07/19 12:00:04 |
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28/05/19 20:00:03 |
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31/03/19 8:31:23 |
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The first pedals will push their way up in spring. 23/03/19 12:03:09 |
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16/03/19 8:00:04 |
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07/01/19 8:00:04 |
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Never go shopping without 'Your Flexible Friend'. 13/11/18 20:06:28 |
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30/10/18 20:00:05 |
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20/10/18 8:00:07 |
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Wed 9:05:29 |
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23/08/19 12:15:34 |
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18/08/19 8:00:58 |
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"Ooh, look at those come to bread eyes!" 17/08/19 9:04:05 |
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28/07/19 8:39:36 |
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Turns out the human brain stores information in chunks. 15/07/19 20:00:07 |
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15/07/19 8:03:50 |
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"I don't want the operation now Doc. The wife's grown quite attached to my hernia." 18/06/19 20:01:14 |
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Come for the hernia. Stay for the rigor mortis. --Scrappy Doo
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*The Emperor* "Hope it's warmer than the last one." 16/06/19 20:00:15 |
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11/05/19 8:02:29 |
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03/04/19 23:12:48 |
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And the worst was the cherry. --Scrappy Doo
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"Let's not involve our insurance companies, it was just a graze." 25/03/19 12:02:14 |
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05/03/19 12:00:04 |
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28/02/19 12:00:05 |
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08/02/19 20:00:25 |
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08/02/19 12:00:04 |
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Fernando had to be a master of disguise to get home in one piece after a show. 11/11/18 21:21:38 |
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Council saves last piece of green belt land. 05/11/18 8:07:53 |
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♪ Nick nack paddy whack, give a dog a cone Tue 8:21:07 |
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I need to stop doing these bloody captions, they're eating up all my spore time. Mon 8:28:13 |
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"All my apples have gone missing. Police suspect fowl play." 25/09/19 20:11:01 |
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11/08/19 8:00:39 |
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"Darling, I think your Dad's taken the baby for a walk in the park again." 25/07/19 8:00:11 |
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09/07/19 8:00:10 |
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07/07/19 8:08:26 |
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05/04/19 8:00:04 |
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03/03/19 8:00:20 |
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Is that Morgan Freeman or a phoney? 08/02/19 8:00:20 |
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26/12/18 13:54:02 |
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20/12/18 12:00:15 |
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18/12/18 20:00:06 |
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P-P-Picked up too many Penguins. 21/10/18 8:00:39 |
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06/10/19 12:00:10 |
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05/10/19 12:00:11 |
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20/09/19 12:29:54 |
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The only way to truly appreciate the size of a woman's handbag is to get inside. 03/09/19 12:50:23 |
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"Daddy, these puppy balloons are really hard to blow up." 20/08/19 20:00:16 |
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The Testicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Itch and the Weird-probe 19/08/19 8:18:34 |
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23/07/19 12:11:29 |
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16/07/19 21:53:51 |
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14/07/19 12:18:47 |
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"The doctor said the rash on my face is lupus." 14/07/19 8:00:08 |
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30/06/19 12:01:13 |
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"Last time I buy earrings on the web." 19/06/19 12:00:16 |
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08/06/19 8:02:09 |
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01/06/19 12:00:12 |
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"When someone rings the doorbell to sell you something, 20/04/19 8:27:20 |
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I see in your comment, James, that you were "drinking and voting" again. For those that don't know, the tallying-program takes this into account: If you've had a few too many...it reduces the weight of your voting. So, please, PLEA... --Greg Curtis
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Ironically he went fishing because his wife kept biting his head off… 21/03/19 20:00:21 |
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16/03/19 20:00:04 |
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04/03/19 20:01:19 |
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"Darling, you look ridiculous going to work with your trousers tucked into your socks." 20/02/19 12:00:05 |
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"Do you want to see my mandrill?" 13/02/19 12:01:37 |
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30/01/19 20:01:04 |
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30/01/19 20:00:17 |
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03/01/19 12:04:54 |
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I think he’s playing a piece by Wag-ner. 17/12/18 8:54:18 |
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13/12/18 8:58:30 |
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♪ I’m with ewe every step of the way 03/12/18 20:04:23 |
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Clive found pretending to win the lottery every couple of months added a bit of spice to life. 15/11/18 22:26:51 |
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Mon 20:00:16 |
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06/10/19 18:11:52 |
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That's another fine mesh I'd like to get into. 06/10/19 9:43:23 |
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03/10/19 20:08:51 |
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Police believe it to be the work of organ-ised crime. 27/09/19 12:00:18 |
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25/09/19 20:00:39 |
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21/09/19 8:32:34 |
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He's hoping for an 'out-of-bodice experience'. 11/09/19 20:10:35 |
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"Sorry, I can't hear you. I think the lines flocked." 06/09/19 12:01:27 |
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25/08/19 8:02:48 |
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21/08/19 20:35:10 |
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21/08/19 20:29:41 |
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"I find the best way to break the ice is to get my chopper out." 11/08/19 22:57:58 |
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"Remember Mummy needs her diaphragm back when Daddy gets home from work." 24/07/19 12:00:04 |
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"Almost went for the soft top but it was too sluggish." 22/07/19 8:00:15 |
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21/06/19 8:00:03 |
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"This is nothing, the wife's tits can touch the ground!" 18/06/19 22:58:55 |
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"Wish that bloody Gulliver wouldn't keep dropping his matches." 15/06/19 12:01:04 |
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10/06/19 12:00:58 |
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04/06/19 12:00:37 |
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25/05/19 8:00:15 |
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16/05/19 12:00:13 |
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Chernobyl farmer insists his potatoes will leave you with a warm glow inside. 05/05/19 12:19:33 |
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28/04/19 8:00:05 |
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21/04/19 8:00:47 |
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I can't get on site til late, went through the captions twice, finally I decided to put in buttressing, only to be told by the dupe detector it had already been done. I went through the captions again, still couldn't find it, then I noticed the ... --John Glover
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"Doctor, I’m having a funny turn." 17/04/19 8:28:48 |
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Handel’s music is getting Messiah and Messiah. 11/04/19 20:01:48 |
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28/03/19 22:34:19 |
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24/03/19 20:00:50 |
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"And my 743rd caption on caption.me was..." 16/03/19 8:19:12 |
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There comes a time when every man needs to consider trimming his Capsicum pubescens. 05/03/19 20:00:59 |
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04/03/19 8:00:08 |
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I've tested my eyesight 500 times this morning already. 28/02/19 8:00:46 |
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When Schrödinger’s cat was finally let out of the box he made up for lost time. 20/02/19 9:01:47 |
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"Mate we’ve been on this green diet of yours for ages now and we’re still fat as f**k." 04/02/19 11:01:14 |
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10/01/19 12:00:04 |
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19/12/18 12:23:03 |
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♪ We all live in a yellow pub-canteen 18/12/18 14:31:36 |
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01/12/18 12:00:05 |
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09/11/18 20:07:06 |
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13/10/18 8:00:08 |
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05/10/18 20:00:09 |
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05/10/19 9:22:27 |
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"What's your name again?" 25/09/19 8:25:28 |
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20/09/19 20:01:11 |
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"She's making me feel thorny..." 18/09/19 8:15:33 |
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17/09/19 12:13:45 |
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06/09/19 20:00:04 |
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Football is a genital man's game. 04/09/19 20:09:16 |
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"Will this give me stretch barks?" 01/09/19 10:06:23 |
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"My wife said I should stop hiding my emulsions." 31/08/19 12:22:18 |
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31/08/19 9:56:09 |
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like it --Stan Peters
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more captions
Must have been arf-ful.
1:26pm
comment on caption:
Calming down after a ruff day [Stephen Bean]
lol
8:49pm
comment on caption:
The Dad Who Gave Birth Part 2:
"Hey guys, what do I do with this cord thingy dangling out of my fanny?" [Stephen Bean]
A rose by any other name would ... OUCH.
11:05pm
comment on caption:
"She's making me feel thorny..." [Stephen Bean]
Make sure you wear a helmet.
10:17pm
comment on caption:
"The wife said I should go cycling when I feel horny." [Stephen Bean]
Strange, as mine says she's on the cycle
10:23am
comment on caption:
"The wife said I should go cycling when I feel horny." [Stephen Bean]
Til death do us--
7:35pm
comment on caption:
To have and too old [Stephen Bean]
And yet one person dies from this every 16 seconds.
3:44pm
comment on caption:
Of all the ways to die, Dave never expected he would one day be crushed to death by an elephant's penis. [Stephen Bean]
Great continuation Scrijjy.
9:28am
comment on caption:
To have and too old [Stephen Bean]
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-49672351
12:40pm
comment on caption:
"Better take off the lid. I don't want the captain seeing that stain," thought Amy, on her first day as a hostess on Airbus A330-243. [Stephen Bean]
She's not Dot Old.
11:28pm
comment on caption:
To have and too old [Stephen Bean]