Stephen Bean
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| Captions | 14 | 37 | #2 | 51 | 104 | #2 | 10161 | 22624 | #5 |
| Comments | 1 | 1 | 800 | 525 | #14 | ||||
| Forum Posts | 3 | 213 | |||||||
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caption quota: 60
caption votes given since joining: 10,259
comment quota: 10
comment votes given since joining: 779
captions
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26/02/20 12:00:54 |
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I'd already decided if I won I wanted to use the money to help caption.me. I've asked Chris if he might consider putting my winnings towards a second prize of £25 for Feb, and a second prize of £25 for March, and otherwise put it towards the c...
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21/04/20 12:00:17 |
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08/07/20 12:00:09 |
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01/04/22 12:10:36 |
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Well done Stephen, you certainly rose to that challenge.
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07/10/18 12:00:09 |
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Still better than Vista.
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04/10/19 20:02:43 |
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"Who killed you?" 31/03/22 12:45:46 |
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"You're doing well on your first shift kid. Hold your arms a bit wider, this next one's really big." 01/11/20 8:03:12 |
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24/04/22 20:21:16 |
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The disappearance of Flight 737 remains a puzzle. 12/07/21 12:03:54 |
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17/10/21 20:44:34 |
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...and escorted off the premises. 20/07/21 12:28:58 |
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"Not today love, I've got a monumental headache." 21/04/20 8:01:37 |
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07/04/20 12:12:18 |
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05/04/20 8:25:13 |
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"Hey guys, 6 feet!"
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01/01/20 8:09:43 |
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Mythical beast world championship result: 02/07/19 12:00:14 |
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Lol
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18/03/19 8:00:04 |
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06/05/22 20:23:58 |
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"Sorry to disturb you. I could've sworn I heard my rattle somewhere around here." 09/08/21 20:00:20 |
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02/06/21 8:00:05 |
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Springer? But I don't even know her.
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"Matron's Easter egg hunt gets harder every year." 04/04/21 20:06:38 |
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21/01/21 20:00:04 |
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L'Orange & Peking, a crowd favorite, but roasted by the judges
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"I threw caution to the wind and it came back." 20/11/20 12:26:24 |
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"Sorry guys, I can't eat any more. I'm stuffed." 19/09/20 12:00:07 |
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Now if only I could get up. Somebody's put superglue on my seat.
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07/07/20 12:05:05 |
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Or Gang Bang?
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28/03/20 12:00:05 |
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Scientists are close to understanding why women live longer than men. 04/03/20 12:00:05 |
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One of the most difficult jobs in the world is to give a sick whale a suppository. 16/01/20 20:16:12 |
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Be careful not to annoy them. They might fly off the handle. 04/04/19 8:26:24 |
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"Can you tell me how many lives you have left?" 22/10/21 20:00:34 |
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"It's a dangerous mission but we need one volunteer to cross the road..." 24/09/21 12:00:30 |
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05/05/21 8:00:06 |
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04/02/21 8:00:06 |
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20/11/20 20:36:54 |
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13/10/20 12:12:25 |
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14/09/20 12:01:23 |
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30/03/20 8:00:12 |
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18/10/19 20:00:10 |
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Mmmm, bishop takes king.... Is this cathedral in Prague? Then the joke is Czech, mate. :^)
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NASA unveil the new rover for their next moon landing. 22/03/19 12:29:53 |
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Right so you could be my Auntie Edna or my Uncle Harold or even Chirpy my pet budgie ..
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Scientists attempt to calculate what a woman really means when she says she's 'fine'. 14/03/19 20:05:54 |
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08/01/19 12:00:04 |
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"What an amazing coincidence. They've both put Rohypnol in each other's drink." 21/11/21 20:28:36 |
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06/10/21 12:05:57 |
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Thank you, it's an honour to have inspired such a great caption. I remember thinking a nod was unnecessary lol.
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"I put my heart and sole into my art." 06/07/21 8:00:05 |
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I put my art and soul into my heart.
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25/05/21 8:08:06 |
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"I don't know why they bother with that sign." 07/12/20 12:14:20 |
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Ouch... :-)
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The last episode of Thomas the Tank Engine was brutal. 24/10/20 14:07:05 |
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22/10/20 20:22:28 |
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06/06/20 8:00:22 |
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How on earth did they get my real picture?
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30/03/20 8:00:05 |
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"Can you stop taking photos and lift my bicycle down for me please love?" 28/03/20 12:24:49 |
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I've got to hand it to you.
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When the neighbour walks by and the car's full of dog food and toilet rolls. 24/03/20 8:02:54 |
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18/03/20 13:27:19 |
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Don't do it Guy. If you go near her you'll need all the hand sanitiser you can get.
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Labrador for sale: in mint condition. 16/03/20 20:00:12 |
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19/11/19 8:00:03 |
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16/09/19 8:00:04 |
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04/09/19 8:09:03 |
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Always slice a cucumber before feeding to your tortoise. 23/11/18 21:52:32 |
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There's big bucks in the fashion industry. 30/10/18 8:08:30 |
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Children should be seen and not hurled. Mon 20:00:07 |
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Nice play on the original caption, but still not a complete pun (makes sense both ways).
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06/04/22 8:44:56 |
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23/03/22 12:18:29 |
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15/03/22 20:15:01 |
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It was the breast of times. It was the thirst of times.
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17/12/21 13:16:16 |
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20/11/21 9:06:50 |
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Only 43 hours? I thought it was more.
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28/03/21 8:00:10 |
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02/02/21 23:11:10 |
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"I told you not to lick my arse." 03/01/21 20:00:28 |
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''I didn't realise you were being serious. I thought you were saying it tongue in cheek.''
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01/09/20 20:00:11 |
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"It was awful. They skinned me from my head tomatoes." 09/07/20 12:03:43 |
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16/06/20 20:09:20 |
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10/06/20 20:15:41 |
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🎵 "Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive, stayin' alive" 29/04/20 20:00:05 |
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few 100 years at least.
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07/04/20 20:00:04 |
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Fay Wray had her favourite part of King Kong stuffed and mounted. 28/01/20 20:01:14 |
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18/01/20 8:00:03 |
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Young people don't respect their elders anymore. 27/09/19 9:19:02 |
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23/07/19 20:00:14 |
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16/07/19 12:00:04 |
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10/07/19 8:09:18 |
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Jesus figured selling selfies on ebay would make him a prophet. 07/05/19 12:02:50 |
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03/05/19 12:02:24 |
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07/02/19 20:00:05 |
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12/01/19 12:00:04 |
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20/04/22 12:00:51 |
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"Why do I always have to go in goal?" 05/04/22 20:01:08 |
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14/02/22 8:02:05 |
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25/01/22 12:00:16 |
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23/11/21 12:02:59 |
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18/11/21 8:00:09 |
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02/08/21 12:05:13 |
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12/05/21 8:00:04 |
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06/03/21 8:00:08 |
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Wow, you can see her knotty bits! 26/02/21 20:00:10 |
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"That's knot nice. Leaf me alone."
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"But mum, I had a bath yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that." 23/11/20 8:53:15 |
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06/11/20 12:17:00 |
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The Loneliness of the Thong Distance Runner 21/10/20 20:34:50 |
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"I can't see a bloody thing with the son in my eyes." 30/09/20 20:05:05 |
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He's about to get a sonburn, even though he's wearing a sonscreen.
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"Noah says he can take the boy, but one of you girls has to stay behind." 29/07/20 21:26:27 |
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"Let's draw straws. The loser has to go with the boy."
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email us
Is he even your dog any more? Maybe he's been cheating on you with another owner.
9:11pm
comment on caption:
You know you've been spending too long on caption.me when your dog asks you to leave home. [Stephen Bean]
Your parents never tell you that they own nine tenths of you from birth. Only one tenth is beyond their control and is allowed for individualistic freedom. The law says.
It is what makes for healthy relationships. Like it did for a slave master and his slaves. When a slave master loses or lost his slave cargo, the law said he was entitled to a compensation claim.
See, masters loved their slaves and when they fell overboard all chained together, the emotional impact it would have had on him isn't even worth thinking about. Imagine, his lazy arse might even need to do some work! 😱 That would take an emotional toll and a half on a poor master. Think of the emotional distress!
Technically though, they would only pay him for every nine slaves out of ten.
9:04am
comment on caption:
Possession is nine tenths of the Laura [Stephen Bean]
Sorry I'm late. Congratulations Steve, great caption.
12:47pm
comment on caption:
"Piss off Dave. Bill's already given me
two mirrors and a windscreen wiper." [Stephen Bean]
Can no Mexicans get over it because it's a segregated bathroom?
8:59am
comment on caption:
"I built this wall you know." [Stephen Bean]
A story by the Brothers Rimm
10:04am
comment on caption:
"Don't worry, he only wants our soles." [Stephen Bean]
Nice play on the original caption, but still not a complete pun (makes sense both ways).
10:16pm
comment on caption:
Children should be seen and not hurled. [Stephen Bean]
🎵 Don’t worry…..Be happy.. 🎵 Remember them lol?
1:01am
comment on caption:
"Ok shows over folks, I've finished singing. Kindly show your appreciation by putting some money on the seat above me," said the busking shark. [Stephen Bean]
Skates On a Train?
:^)
12:18am
comment on caption:
"I have had it with these motherf**king sharks on this motherf**king train!!!!" [Stephen Bean]
The only drawback is that Goldilocks is incredibly picky so she would have probably picked somebody else's car to drive...
8:11am
comment on caption:
"Steady now. Goldilock's car will be in range any moment..."
[Stephen Bean]
Either that or the right is arming bears.
2:14pm
comment on caption:
They're exercising the right to bear arms.
[Stephen Bean]