| This Week | Last Week | All Time | |||||||
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| Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | |
| Captions | 35 | 93 | #1 | 45 | 84 | #4 | 1520 | 2559 | #49 |
| Comments | 2 | 4 | 3 | #4 | 216 | 74 | #40 | ||
| Forum Posts | 4 | 137 | |||||||
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Stephen Bean
signed up: 8 months, 3 weeks ago
profile viewed: 34 time(s) this week
caption quota: 46
votes given since joining: 1,135
super vote quota: 0
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captions
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07/10/18 12:00:09 |
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18/03/19 8:00:04 |
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Be careful not to annoy them. They might fly off the handle. 04/04/19 8:26:24 |
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NASA unveil the new rover for their next moon landing. 22/03/19 12:29:53 |
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Right so you could be my Auntie Edna or my Uncle Harold or even Chirpy my pet budgie .. --stone face
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Scientists attempt to calculate what a woman really means when she says she's 'fine'. 14/03/19 20:05:54 |
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08/01/19 12:00:04 |
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Always slice a cucumber before feeding to your tortoise. 23/11/18 21:52:32 |
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There’s big bucks in the fashion industry. 30/10/18 8:08:30 |
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Jesus figured selling selfies on ebay would make him a prophet. 07/05/19 12:02:50 |
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03/05/19 12:02:24 |
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07/02/19 20:00:05 |
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12/01/19 12:00:04 |
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31/05/19 12:00:16 |
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18/05/19 8:00:03 |
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16/05/19 8:00:03 |
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Glad it's not just me that struggles with a Toblerone. 14/04/19 12:14:01 |
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That's cool well done - I love toblerone wish I could find one that big --BAD BOY DENNIS *
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28/11/18 12:01:09 |
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03/10/18 20:00:29 |
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12/06/19 8:00:04 |
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13/05/19 20:00:03 |
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12/05/19 20:00:05 |
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26/04/19 8:00:15 |
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16/04/19 12:00:05 |
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20/03/19 12:00:06 |
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Yeah couldn't agree more James, great caption. --The Wolf
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25/02/19 8:00:26 |
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08/01/19 8:00:05 |
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When a caption appears after a few seconds it will probably have been prepared in advance rather than be the result of ''speed and cleverness''. The lucky captioneer will simply be the one who downloads it the quickest. As Karyn points out, it... --Dave Bryan
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26/12/18 20:00:06 |
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"Please officer, can you let me off? It’s my birthday tomorrow." 24/12/18 12:52:15 |
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Rambo’s mission was to shoot the country’s monarch. 10/12/18 8:39:10 |
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13/11/18 20:01:06 |
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Nod to https://www.caption.me/356778https://www.caption.me/277138https://www.caption.me/63354 --Funny Bean
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"Sh*t, what a time for the batteries in my xray glasses to run out." 09/06/19 8:01:49 |
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29/05/19 12:00:13 |
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"I’m crap at following instructions from Ikea." 21/04/19 8:41:48 |
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12/04/19 12:05:07 |
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"I've been staring at this photo for 20 minutes... Just noticed the cat." 02/04/19 12:02:50 |
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15/03/19 8:00:06 |
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08/03/19 20:00:03 |
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17/02/19 20:00:06 |
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31/12/18 8:02:11 |
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25/12/18 20:16:21 |
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Mon 8:28:53 |
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Sat 9:14:08 |
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"Ok, there's my nan. Remember to tell her we've 06/05/19 9:05:10 |
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He's making a Mastiff mistake. 01/05/19 13:00:02 |
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"You should've seen my goatee." 18/03/19 12:01:05 |
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Looks like size does matter when it comes to attracting birds. 15/03/19 22:42:30 |
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09/02/19 12:00:04 |
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02/01/19 8:23:23 |
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31/12/18 12:00:04 |
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When cleaning an elephant enclosure, always keep your vizor down. 08/12/18 10:02:52 |
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04/11/18 12:11:14 |
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28/05/19 20:00:03 |
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31/03/19 8:31:23 |
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The first pedals will push their way up in spring. 23/03/19 12:03:09 |
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16/03/19 8:00:04 |
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07/01/19 8:00:04 |
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Never go shopping without 'Your Flexible Friend'. 13/11/18 20:06:28 |
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30/10/18 20:00:05 |
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20/10/18 8:00:07 |
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*The Emperor* "Hope it's warmer than the last one." Sun 20:00:15 |
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11/05/19 8:02:29 |
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03/04/19 23:12:48 |
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And the worst was the cherry. --Scrappy Doo
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"Let's not involve our insurance companies, it was just a graze." 25/03/19 12:02:14 |
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05/03/19 12:00:04 |
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28/02/19 12:00:05 |
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08/02/19 20:00:25 |
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08/02/19 12:00:04 |
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Fernando had to be a master of disguise to get home in one piece after a show. 11/11/18 21:21:38 |
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Council saves last piece of green belt land. 05/11/18 8:07:53 |
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05/04/19 8:00:04 |
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03/03/19 8:00:20 |
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Is that Morgan Freeman or a phoney? 08/02/19 8:00:20 |
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26/12/18 13:54:02 |
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20/12/18 12:00:15 |
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18/12/18 20:00:06 |
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P-P-Picked up too many Penguins. 21/10/18 8:00:39 |
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08/06/19 8:02:09 |
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01/06/19 12:00:12 |
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"When someone rings the doorbell to sell you something, 20/04/19 8:27:20 |
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I see in your comment, James, that you were "drinking and voting" again. For those that don't know, the tallying-program takes this into account: If you've had a few too many...it reduces the weight of your voting. So, please, PLEA... --Greg Curtis
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Ironically he went fishing because his wife kept biting his head off… 21/03/19 20:00:21 |
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16/03/19 20:00:04 |
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04/03/19 20:01:19 |
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"Darling, you look ridiculous going to work with your trousers tucked into your socks." 20/02/19 12:00:05 |
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"Do you want to see my mandrill?" 13/02/19 12:01:37 |
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30/01/19 20:01:04 |
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30/01/19 20:00:17 |
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03/01/19 12:04:54 |
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I think he’s playing a piece by Wag-ner. 17/12/18 8:54:18 |
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13/12/18 8:58:30 |
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♪ I’m with ewe every step of the way 03/12/18 20:04:23 |
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Clive found pretending to win the lottery every couple of months added a bit of spice to life. 15/11/18 22:26:51 |
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"Wish that bloody Gulliver wouldn't keep dropping his matches." Sat 12:01:04 |
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10/06/19 12:00:58 |
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04/06/19 12:00:37 |
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25/05/19 8:00:15 |
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16/05/19 12:00:13 |
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Chernobyl farmer insists his potatoes will leave you with a warm glow inside. 05/05/19 12:19:33 |
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28/04/19 8:00:05 |
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21/04/19 8:00:47 |
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I can't get on site til late, went through the captions twice, finally I decided to put in buttressing, only to be told by the dupe detector it had already been done. I went through the captions again, still couldn't find it, then I noticed the ... --John Glover
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"Doctor, I’m having a funny turn." 17/04/19 8:28:48 |
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Handel’s music is getting Messiah and Messiah. 11/04/19 20:01:48 |
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28/03/19 22:34:19 |
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24/03/19 20:00:50 |
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"And my 743rd caption on caption.me was..." 16/03/19 8:19:12 |
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There comes a time when every man needs to consider trimming his Capsicum pubescens. 05/03/19 20:00:59 |
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04/03/19 8:00:08 |
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I've tested my eyesight 500 times this morning already. 28/02/19 8:00:46 |
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When Schrödinger’s cat was finally let out of the box he made up for lost time. 20/02/19 9:01:47 |
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"Mate we’ve been on this green diet of yours for ages now and we’re still fat as f**k." 04/02/19 11:01:14 |
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10/01/19 12:00:04 |
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19/12/18 12:23:03 |
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♪ We all live in a yellow pub-canteen 18/12/18 14:31:36 |
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01/12/18 12:00:05 |
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09/11/18 20:07:06 |
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13/10/18 8:00:08 |
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05/10/18 20:00:09 |
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04/06/19 20:00:03 |
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"A horse, a horse, my condom for a horse." 02/06/19 12:25:00 |
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When the cat's awake the mice will play 03/05/19 14:54:17 |
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24/04/19 12:00:03 |
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"Glad I found my truck after that storm last night… Now where the f*ck's my house?" 28/03/19 12:01:01 |
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Fast food is my gilty pleasure. 24/03/19 12:07:17 |
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The only known cure for caption addiction. 27/02/19 15:27:26 |
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The only cure is to leave in a box. --Scrappy Doo
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21/02/19 18:17:52 |
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20/02/19 8:31:29 |
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03/02/19 12:00:06 |
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Four smelt it and one dealt it. 02/02/19 21:10:58 |
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He must have a fart of gold. --Karyn Harrison
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02/02/19 20:37:24 |
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31/01/19 20:11:57 |
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Those drawers probably haven’t been opened in a while. 16/12/18 20:15:30 |
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09/12/18 12:06:20 |
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Billy made the lift by a splits second. 08/12/18 12:00:04 |
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07/12/18 23:04:28 |
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Mushrooms can cause a reptile dysfunction. 25/11/18 12:00:19 |
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25/11/18 12:00:05 |
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21/11/18 8:00:07 |
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Mag-pie and chips 20/11/18 20:00:11 |
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12/11/18 20:28:28 |
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04/11/18 8:36:33 |
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"Why are you telling me my journey has terminated? I have another bus to catch." 31/10/18 20:00:19 |
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"Whose idea was it to sell life insurance to Usain Bolt?" 25/10/18 8:12:33 |
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The benefits of living until 200 12/10/18 20:09:39 |
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05/10/18 12:00:14 |
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29/09/18 13:46:24 |
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Fri 8:04:51 |
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He said his penis was 7 inches. Turns out it was erection fraud. 05/06/19 12:02:05 |
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05/06/19 8:43:56 |
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04/06/19 12:00:04 |
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"Sorry, I've not seen Little Weed anywhere Sister Mary Jane." 29/05/19 8:00:05 |
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17/05/19 13:42:10 |
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14/05/19 8:17:36 |
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13/05/19 8:00:27 |
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08/05/19 8:14:33 |
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30/04/19 20:08:53 |
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29/04/19 8:03:26 |
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27/04/19 20:00:10 |
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"Go away! Can't you see I'm doing my captions?" 23/04/19 12:00:36 |
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18/04/19 8:01:13 |
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01/04/19 12:00:03 |
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22/03/19 12:21:40 |
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Billy left the kids at home with their nanny. 20/03/19 12:00:34 |
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My Nan’s earwax is getting out of control. 18/03/19 20:00:57 |
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13/03/19 12:18:59 |
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The world '1 potato, 2 potato' champion receives his trophy. 12/03/19 8:00:04 |
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Has anyone else asked KaZzDaRaZz for a higher resolution version of this photo? 09/03/19 12:00:53 |
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Lol. I think this pic is showing us the results of one of those all-to-common cases of death by extreme cushion frotting. Apparently, the serious friction from this activity has caused many a weirdo to go up like the Hindenburg! She should be okay... --Karen Oakenfull
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09/03/19 12:00:05 |
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02/03/19 12:00:36 |
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15/02/19 20:00:03 |
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"When I touch my knob I feel gilty." 13/02/19 20:04:03 |
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10/01/19 20:09:14 |
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02/01/19 8:00:05 |
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01/01/19 12:00:06 |
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28/12/18 12:42:27 |
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14/12/18 12:28:36 |
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"When you said we’d have a great White Christmas this year I had something else in mind." 14/12/18 12:05:49 |
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"It’s only three bucks for a pint." 11/12/18 12:00:06 |
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04/12/18 12:06:49 |
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Cross-dressed to kill 😁😁 --Mr Dome
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29/11/18 8:01:06 |
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It's a labia of love. --Michael Winner
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22/11/18 8:30:11 |
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I try to post captions that are relevant and different and try not to rehash old ones. If it is a particularly irksome point don't vote for it but the site is just a bit of fun - if a caption fits perfectly then post it regardless of whether it'... --Mr Dome
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21/11/18 20:19:19 |
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13/11/18 20:03:35 |
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Clever pun. I like the way they've hidden their Primark purchases in Chanel bags. ;) --Pussy Galore
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I wish I could takeaway her dress. 30/10/18 12:00:05 |
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Thanks for the tip. I never realised you could use copy and paste on the site. --Dave Bryan
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Borrower outperforms rats in laboratory tests. 25/10/18 21:23:19 |
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"He's not been the same since he Sun 8:38:20 |
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Fri 8:48:24 |
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"It'll be bloody Christmas by the time I think of a good caption for this photo." Thu 20:14:01 |
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10/06/19 8:51:47 |
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07/06/19 9:03:05 |
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"So you went to see the shrink too huh?" 28/05/19 8:00:06 |
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25/05/19 8:00:04 |
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"So guys, how did the paintball competition go?" 20/05/19 8:38:35 |
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"Nan, are you sure this'll scare the birds away from your onions?" 10/05/19 8:14:03 |
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09/05/19 20:20:26 |
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07/05/19 21:50:46 |
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04/05/19 20:00:04 |
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23/04/19 22:56:22 |
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Her boyfriend is multilingual. 17/04/19 12:00:51 |
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05/04/19 8:01:34 |
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The moral of the story is not to re-wire the house while Mrs Peterson feeds her cat. 02/04/19 20:43:35 |
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02/04/19 12:10:56 |
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more captions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsW9MlYu31g
10:01pm
comment on caption:
"I am altering the caption. Pray I don't alter it any further." [Stephen Bean]
Nod to 8:09:36 (seen after caption made)
8:19am
comment on caption:
Milfy Bra Kid [Stephen Bean]
It would appear that the dupe detector doesn't work anymore
8:28am
comment on caption:
Milfy Bra Kid [Stephen Bean]
I tried to enter "Herr Flicka" then I found the duplicate. If there were more Swedish horse film fans than us you might have got more votes.
6:05am
comment on caption:
"I like to Flicka my hair." [Stephen Bean]
Thank you Kenny. Herr Flicka is a great caption! Feel free to put it on!
11:28pm
comment on caption:
"I like to Flicka my hair." [Stephen Bean]
Mine can do tooth hurty.
8:13pm
comment on caption:
"My car can do 180 molars per hour." [Stephen Bean]
Smiles per hour?
8:31pm
comment on caption:
"My car can do 180 molars per hour." [Stephen Bean]
Nice one Glyn. I can’t use it now someone has done smiles per gallon.
8:47pm
comment on caption:
"My car can do 180 molars per hour." [Stephen Bean]
WOOF!!!
8:03am
comment on caption:
Man's biggest friend [Stephen Bean]
"Would you like flies with that?"
10:13pm
comment on caption:
Cosme-tics [Stephen Bean]