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Chris Keegan

	This Week			Last Week			All Time
	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	4	20	#4	31	60	#5	6609	11659	#17
Comments							118	182	#32
Forum Posts	3						7

caption quota: 49
caption votes given since joining: 3,970
comment quota: 34
comment votes given since joining: 149

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Reports are coming in stating Theresa May is back in Brussels making one last push to get a Brexit deal"

13/03/19 12:20:20

So that's why she had a sore throat.. --stone face

Fairground regrets telling kids they can stay on as long as they like for 5 shillings.

04/03/22 12:00:30

Well done Chris , now get off and let someone else have a go. --Tony S

"Come on officer, I was only doing a fraction over"

17/09/18 12:00:08

The final episode of Peppa Pig

02/11/17 8:14:09

"I SPENT A BLOODY HOUR MAKING THAT I TAKE A NAP AND NOW IT’S BOXED UP IN BITS!!"

27/10/21 12:06:41

Hi all, many thanks for all your kind comments and votes, I'm in bits! I recently took some time off the site however the rehab clearly didn't work and it's great to be back transfixed to my phone in dark corridors with my fellow captionoholics... --Chris Keegan

Convenience food.

21/04/19 14:14:53

When I suddenly saw this in the road I had to break fast.

05/03/19 8:00:15

"I'll have the table cloth please"

10/02/19 9:57:28

This was a tough pic. Well done. --James Lennox

No wonder it's tired, it came in at twenty to one.

16/12/18 12:00:20

I find it odd. --Scrappy Doo

15/04/18 20:04:11

The economy has seriously hit the restaurant trade with many having to reduce the size of their kitchen staff.

16/10/21 20:03:34

Cash test dummies

12/05/19 20:21:22

"Borrow the car? Oh Philip, you do make one laugh sometimes"

16/02/19 12:00:07

Dave landed 137 fish this morning, simply by pulling the plug out.

29/10/20 12:01:38

It's a studio apartment.

26/04/18 8:00:11

This is incredible , if you screw your eyes up, tilt your head slightly to one side and totally concentrate on the image, after about 5 minutes you'll feel a sharp slap on the back of the head and the missus screaming "you're not on that bloody caption thing again!"

14/01/20 12:17:31

That's a magic "Oi!" --Troompa Loompa

"Darling, when I suggested putting a Garland in the window I was actually thinking of something a bit more Christmassy"

06/12/19 12:00:49

Oh Jeeezus, that was a mistake drying off the puppies in the microwave...

08/10/19 8:24:53

A genuine laugh out loud moment for me. Well done, Chris. By the way, I've heard the RSPCA will be paying you a visit later. --Vivvy En

Jack Knickerless

24/06/19 12:54:05

Panting by numbers

02/01/19 16:33:06

"It's a lemon entry my dear Watson"

18/12/18 12:00:41

Reader's Digest

17/12/18 20:00:10

"Not tonight love, I've got a monumental headache"

29/11/18 12:02:47

"...mind if I grab your ASpirin?" --Greg Curtis

Apparently he gets through 2 packs a day.

23/09/21 12:00:07

"Where's gran?"
- "I think she popped out for a hare cut"

11/11/19 8:00:22

Apparently it's a house full of squatters.

21/10/19 20:02:17

"For goodness sake Colin, you and your bloody obsession for taking road kill home..."

26/09/19 8:05:13

Lol --The Wolf

Bob Dylan videos aren't what they used to be..

06/06/19 9:23:56

"I suppose a blue job is out of the question?"

03/06/19 22:16:27

Happy hour wasn't going well.

11/03/19 12:09:06

The Hound of Music

17/12/18 8:02:21

Took the mother in law out last night. First punch.

30/09/18 20:11:16

And I'm fryer tuck!

26/02/18 20:02:46

I don't usually do the dogs but I put a monkey on this one

23/02/18 20:11:31

Later that evening George couldn’t wait to tear off her knickers , they were killing him.

08/04/22 9:07:45

30/05/19 8:00:10

He's a sh*t guitarist, but you should see him playing tennis

04/05/19 15:48:55

Love this --Mr Dome

The firing squad clearly have a sense of humour.

11/04/19 12:34:28

Beach trampolines - Â£5 for 5 minutes. Warning - Do not exceed your time.

06/04/19 9:06:37

It looks like Jones has scored.

11/03/19 8:06:13

"And would Sir like aperitif to go with your meal?"

19/11/18 20:01:18

Staff bullying should not be tolerated

15/10/18 12:00:12

Once again Gary was keen to illustrate how we are just one tiny part of the galaxy

29/06/18 21:21:07

Hi all,
So many thanks for attending our first ever get together, it was fantastic to actually meet all of you. Framed prints of the attached are available online, please note there is an additional charge of £2 for the colour option.
All the best,
Chris Beach.

18/10/21 20:00:24

I spent most of the 80's listening to The Wall.

06/02/21 18:33:44

I preferred listening to the Doors. --Karyn Harrison

"What was the sell by date on those eggs love?"

04/12/20 12:09:49

"Don't worry, we've still got two days left." --Willie Johnson

From this moment onwards Tina stopped playing on trampolines.

06/07/20 20:15:34

When the coffee shops eventually reopened Rex could only reminisce over his 6 daily walks.

09/05/20 14:04:36

Madame Tussauds reveal waxwork commissioned by The White House. So far it has successfully attended 2 summits, 1 state occasion and a banquet without saying anything stupid.

30/08/19 10:57:08

Boris Johnson places an order. --Molly R

It was the Gillette condoms which gave me serious grief.

28/08/19 12:04:49

Julie was beginning to regret buying her bras from Amazon.

04/06/19 22:19:52

Darling, could you just put the landing light on?

22/03/19 20:04:26

Global warming - It turns out the butler did it.

19/11/18 12:00:10

Don't you just hate it when things from Amazon are left outside?

13/10/18 9:11:35

Further tests reveal smoking definitely stunts growth

11/10/18 8:00:50

Darling, have you seen my Good Housekeeping mag anywhere?

09/08/18 8:09:35

"Darling, just to let you know, I'm bringing someone back for dinner tonight"

06/08/18 12:00:20

Black Friday and the wife is spending the whole bloody day online"¦.

24/11/17 12:16:43

"Are you OK to hold madam, I've got one or two others waiting for the meter reading department"

01/04/22 8:22:35

The wife spends most of her day laying in the bath

03/03/22 12:11:33

Rex just loves a serious dog fight.

03/12/21 20:00:08

I bet he'll shoot down the Red Setter Baron --Glyn Evans

The Cattle of Hastings.

10/10/21 9:46:35

"I really don't know where he got it from but it's everytime he's about to take off he's got to point out the emergency exits"

19/09/20 9:18:07

Brothels open up again, but you'll need more than a condom.

25/07/20 13:33:54

Consequently Sharon hasn't lost any knickers off the line in weeks

17/06/20 12:28:22

Dirty bitch hasn't washed any that's why. --Morgan .

Drowning Street

27/05/20 12:06:12

I was a little surprised when she asked, but I'm really hoping she likes the photo of my cock.

04/02/20 8:00:45

She's attempting to kick the habit.

10/10/19 20:00:10

"Why the short face??"

19/07/19 8:00:34

Old. Fashioned.

04/05/19 8:14:34

"Darren, when I asked you to put the TV on...."

22/01/19 20:00:08

I just find at this time of year my colander gets really busy

19/12/18 20:01:32

No batteries required

12/10/18 8:00:11

Drawing eyes on a banana with a felt-tip pen so that it looks like a dolphin is very amusing and it gives me someone to talk to! --Karyn Harrison

It 's ever since i started them on Winalot.

22/08/18 8:13:01

05/08/18 8:00:11

Jesus, I really did upset her this time

13/06/18 8:06:42

06/05/18 12:00:07

Guys, 4 passengers is the max I'm allowed..what do you think this is..a bloody Tardis??

25/04/18 20:02:29

Fowling the pavement

05/11/17 21:17:57

Debbie and Ray are so pleased the warmer weather has arrived, they can finally afford to eat today.

09/05/22 12:01:30

'Working from home hasn't affected me at all' Said Michael Jones, Director of Lloyds Bank.

25/11/20 8:36:44

Mike detects earth tremors pretty much everywhere he goes.

03/11/20 12:00:33

"I tried that new barbers down the road yesterday"
- "Yeah, me too Dave"

30/10/20 12:04:33

In a moment of magnificent inspiration Kevin and Julie saved themselves thirty quid for a babysitter and went out.

27/10/20 8:00:41

The lights are on but nobody's home. --Willie Johnson

Tom and Dave think it's bloody hilarious nobody can go out clubbing anymore!

26/10/20 12:00:08

They had a boy. Greyam.

22/09/20 12:01:56

Dave was devastated when his mum and dad suggested it was time he moved out.

02/07/20 8:07:42

Yet another blond moment strikes, Linda had an appointment to see the Doc.

26/06/20 12:24:50

Sainsburys are forced to close as a Tate and Lyle delivery goes horribly wrong.

17/01/20 9:13:05

Now in Cinemas - Frozen, number 2.

23/12/19 8:05:40

🎵..the Red-Nosed Reindeer....🎵

20/12/19 12:40:27

Don't know whether the lady's a Dancer or a Vixen! --Karyn Harrison

This wasn't what Malcolm expected when he joined the Army and was told he'd be posted abroad.

19/12/19 21:27:51

It would seem we've signed a new player...

20/11/19 8:00:25

After years of searching it was clear that I had discovered why bears sh*t in the woods.

25/10/19 8:01:46

09/08/19 21:33:36

"Quick Dave! Pull your trigger!!!"

26/05/19 8:34:33

"Yes love, it does"

02/04/19 12:02:41

Jesus Christ love, we're only going down the pub for a quick half!

21/01/19 20:06:32

And how was your Bernard Matthews turkey?

27/12/18 10:11:02

I laughed because I had both "bootiful" and "tough as old boots" pop into my head at the same instant! --Molly R

Good old Dave, he spent so long attempting to chip his ball out of the bunker he moved in.

20/11/18 13:50:19