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Al Overy

signed up: 8 months ago
profile viewed: 9 time(s) this week
caption quota: 64
votes given since joining: 1,147
super vote quota: 22

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'Never laugh at your own jokes', people keep saying to me. Someone has to.

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captions

£50
WINNER

lol x2

creative

BREAKING - Sniffer dog retires after largest ever cocaine find. He left on a high, said his handler.

10/10/20 11:00:14

Thanks again everyone. --Al Overy

lol x2

creative

"Hello, is that Chris Beach? Listen, I won the January Caption competition bigly and everyone knows it! SO FIND MY MISSING VOTES!!!"

16/02/21 8:00:07

"Listen, all I need you to do is find me 25 more votes, or I won't like you as much. Stop the steal." Signed, anon voter --Willie Johnson

lol

creative

I'd been applying for jobs for months, sent thousands of CVs and been rejected on countless occasions. Eventually I lowered my expectations and, although the pay is really crap, I am proud to call myself Trainee Assistant Dung Beetle.

06/01/21 20:00:41

£50
WINNER

lol

Blind people: never walk near swamps with an inexperienced guide dog.

05/12/20 20:07:54

... or an inexperienced bog guide.Well done Al. Great caption. --James Lennox

creative

Tonight on Panorama: Is there too much oestrogen in our water? We speak to three men in their thirties about their experiences.

17/02/21 8:01:22

Transisters?There's still work in radio. --Mauris Iocus

lol

"You spoil that moth!"

13/11/20 8:00:37

It's the least we can do... he knows what's behind your closet door... we've robbed him of his progeny. --Mauris Iocus

lol

"For goodness sake, Ted! I told you not to lie on the dog blanket with suncream on!"

14/08/20 7:00:18

lol

Have a Snickers, Pingu! You're not yourself when you're hungry!

06/02/21 20:03:05

Fur coat no snickers --Mr Dome

lol x2

"If you were 'at your desk all morning', Mildred, how do explain this battered courgette next to an open copy of Lady Chatterley's Lover?"

12/02/21 12:00:37

clever

"Hang in there, Mr Atlas, sir! We'll have you out in no time!"

02/01/21 8:34:51

"I bless you in the name of the father, the son and the holey ball with a bell in that smells of catnip."

30/11/20 8:00:48

News in today - the army is running out of thick jumpers.

30/08/20 7:03:27

Just heard new recruits will be dropping in. --Mauris Iocus

Right wing polly tricks

15/10/20 11:58:01

clever

"I recognised you from the thruppenny bits, Ma'am."
"Likewise!"

27/07/20 18:12:29

"Are you kidding me? NO! You can't have your boomerang back!"

09/01/21 8:00:13

"She's a lazy bitch, smells of wee and drinks out the toilet. But she can just about keep up with me if she leans on the buggy", said Ted.

29/11/20 20:00:19

lol

"If you can stay at home stay at home, otherwise go to work but don't go to work if you can work at home. Meet outside, not inside unless you have to meet inside but wear a mask, even if you are outside with six people in a public place or thirty people in a church. Everyone clear?"

17/12/20 13:06:24

I see your future, young one. You will go on to be... In many, many, MANY captions.

30/11/20 8:02:38

Little house on the purry

09/09/20 11:29:34

The Floppy Cock Clinic were delighted with their tasteful rebrand.

11/07/20 7:15:43

Foolout

29/01/21 12:02:40

clever

LGBTQUEUE

20/12/20 12:06:25

Mini hands make light work.

12/12/20 8:00:35

lol

When you forget to put the bins out, hear the dust lorry outside and just try to move them by telekinesis instead.

30/10/20 21:40:12

"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, you'll be a Mannequin, my son!"

17/10/20 11:00:21

Ruff sketch

18/09/20 11:03:05

Inkongnito

16/09/20 11:17:08

"Give us a really big wave!"

10/09/20 7:04:41

Spitting image

05/09/20 7:00:06

"No nick-a la sturgeon!"

23/08/20 11:00:12

That's so bad I had to vote for it. --Dave Bryan

"Apart from the holes in the shower curtain, this Bates Motel seems nice love."

17/07/20 11:57:08

Hop tub

30/01/21 8:00:31

Turner and Smooch

20/01/21 12:00:20

"Ok madam. Take your time. Now then, which one of these monstrous perverts caught a glimpse of your ankle?"

19/01/21 8:00:12

Due to a recent spate of shoplifting, all customers were closely monitored.

20/12/20 20:00:22

Gulliver

19/12/20 12:00:11

This is the Mersey Glyn. She's a Liver bird. --Karyn Harrison

"Migrate? Migrate?"

"Yes, you're great. Now shut up!"

18/11/20 20:26:06

Big wed bus

11/11/20 8:00:06

clever

Orchestral Manoeuvres with a Shark.

22/10/20 11:06:14

Frankie Goes to Hobbycraft

28/09/20 19:01:03

'You have successfully booked your haircut appointment.'

24/09/20 11:10:58

"Can you tell me the quickest way to the loo, please?"

"Are you walking or driving?"

"Walking."

"It's quicker if you drive."

20/09/20 7:04:47

"Are you walking or driving?" "Skipping - 🎵 Skip, skip, skip to my lou". --Willie Johnson

That famous scene from The Whining.

19/09/20 19:00:25

All work and no play makes Jack Russel a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack Russel a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack Russel a dull boy --Glyn Evans

Up here, Fred could only get a couple of baas on his phone.

17/08/20 7:01:12

Be even better with "only get one baa", I reckon. --Molly R

When you have no actual friends and overcompensate.

02/08/20 7:32:05

clever

Gina tried everything to take her mind off the horrendous subsidence at the rear of her apartment.

17/02/21 20:00:39

"But can you do Bush?"

01/02/21 20:00:06

When your hallucinogenic cocktail of medication makes your NHS nurse look like Jessica Rabbit.

17/01/21 20:04:51

Later, their al fresco threesome was interrupted by the cops. Wednesday legged it, leaving Fester in the Lurch.

15/01/21 20:04:42

Nobody was prepared for the terrible castanet shortage which followed Brexit.

21/12/20 8:01:25

That's amazing. It seems obvious that there would be less French fishermen to castanet. --Dave Bryan

Blue Planet Uncovered features David Attenborough as you've never seen him before. 'After a couple of cans of Monster, he was an absolute animal', said the crew.

13/12/20 20:00:16

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir. I thought I saw a banana in your pocket."

01/12/20 12:00:13

"Can't a man inspect his privates in peace!?"

03/11/20 22:42:21

My first attempt at glass blowing went completely tits up.

21/08/20 19:00:14

Due to Covid, seating arrangements are up in the air.

21/08/20 7:21:39

Miss Guided Missile

13/08/20 7:07:27

Bad news love. The carwash has furloughed me.

09/08/20 19:00:54

Toast modernism.

21/07/20 12:33:20

lol x2

Next on Channel 4, Escape to the Chateau.

10/07/20 7:08:23

Think it must've been taken during lockdown. --Karyn Harrison

"Do you like your hair, Paul?"

"Yes, I love me do!"

Sun 12:03:01

Gonna shout it far and wide, across the universe. --Willie Johnson

In and Out of Africa

30/01/21 20:02:37

Every Primark shirt undergoes rigorous testing to match the demands of our customers' daily lifestyle!

18/01/21 12:00:44

"It's true. Our studies have shown 4 out of 5 rapists prefer Primark. Now with our trademarked Easy-Rinse DNA-B-Gone, casual fabrics." --Mauris Iocus

Eggscavation

30/11/20 12:00:07

We call him Fonzie, as he generally has a bird on each arm.

13/09/20 11:00:15

The sad, unwanted, furry creature sat on the sofa for hours. His only company a teddy bear.

13/09/20 7:02:46

lol

"Right! No more kids!", shouted Mr Melon. "There's no room in the car when we go on holiday!"

11/09/20 7:10:06

"Will you join us?"

"No, I have a table for two."

"I don't blame you dear. You don't want backache."

08/08/20 7:35:03

Whatever possessed you to get up there?

12/07/20 7:04:36

"Necks please!"

23/01/21 8:01:51

"Police. There's someone at the gate fencing scarves." --Mauris Iocus

"What's that, Skippy? Pass you a lighter and stand well back?"

22/01/21 8:00:12

"Want to faunicate?"

20/01/21 20:00:07

Even after a crippling accident, Mr Punch would still attempt to fight the crocodile.

14/12/20 8:00:47

creative

"Mr Hitchcock, the interviewees have arrived."

09/12/20 12:03:04

Chicken 'n' a Basket

19/11/20 8:01:46

"You put your left legs in, your left legs out..."

18/10/20 7:02:28

A memorial to our dog Rover
He's buried under this flyover
There he was, chasing a cat
When a steamroller squashed him flat

18/09/20 11:04:49

Love triangle

12/09/20 7:09:25

Felines were running high.

09/08/20 7:41:07

When you're so excited to go swimming, you forget the Alka-Seltzer in your pocket.

04/08/20 14:20:29

"Dear Mrs Smith, due to the current social distancing measures we are unable to provide certain face-to-face services at the clinic. Please bring your stool sample with you to the front desk."

29/07/20 16:42:36

Side effects of too much catnip may include hallucinations...

26/07/20 12:02:01

"Don't cry mum. I'll find Nanny's pulse..."

18/07/20 7:01:37

lol

The uneasy juxtaposition, the anachronistic context, the applaudable rejection of ostentation. Still, it was Gav's jacket and he liked it.

17/07/20 18:22:09

During the Victorian era many new words were added to the English language, such as 'stunt', 'faceplant' and 'twat'.

13/02/21 12:00:38

lol

The Tarantino remake of Hansel and Gretel was especially brutal.

25/01/21 21:19:56

P-P-Pick Up a Penguin. (You'll need a shovel, a bucket and a strong stomach).

01/01/21 8:34:16

"So, Sue died when her quad bike went into the river?"

"No, just after she connected the jump leads."

22/12/20 20:02:22

It's a metaphor for Brexit: Someone high up had a lightbulb moment, kept everyone in the dark, and now all the little people are screwed.

12/12/20 8:02:07

Government finally reveals mastermind behind all major policy decisions.

29/11/20 12:02:11

She was displaying signs of Covid but, as responsible parents, we still visit the playground once a day to throw food in.

16/11/20 8:00:42

I'm not saying it's not impressive, Geoff, but you did start the walk when you were twenty-three.

25/10/20 20:00:28

Notwork Rail

24/10/20 11:00:13

Within minutes the whole joint was swinging!

03/10/20 15:38:15

creative

"I caught a fish this big!"

19/09/20 7:00:47

"I caught an entire school, there were this many teachers in it" --Glyn Evans

Deliveroomatism

14/09/20 7:06:18

Bridget Jones's Diarrhoea.

13/09/20 19:00:45

"Here we go... browsing history. I knew it! Dad likes big tits too!"

02/09/20 7:00:18

"Roll up, roll up! Get yer lovely 'No Loitering' signs."

19/07/20 19:04:14

The Boniness of the Long Distance Runner

19/02/21 8:01:31

"Have you been queuing long?"

08/02/21 20:00:09

Around the cluck service.

08/02/21 12:00:40

lol

"I don't know why my girlfriend smacked me in the face. I didn't forget Valentine's Day. I got her a sack of charcoal and some screen wash on my way home."

08/02/21 8:01:11

But surely she should be grateful for what she has...even if she isn't an artist or doesn't have a car. Maybe she'd prefer what I do for my girlfriend - I sacrifice a goat in her honour which usually appeases her. --Glyn Evans

Quacks in the pavement.

07/02/21 20:00:08

Prince Philip welcomes you to Sandringham!

05/02/21 20:01:28

lol

I loved that old Rover but it did enjoy rolling in fox poo.

28/01/21 20:03:42

'D'ya get anyfink unusual for Christmas?'

'Chlamydia.'

'I said UNusual!'

08/01/21 8:17:12

During the military coup, several towns were badly sacked.

07/01/21 8:07:42

"Hello... Childline? Yes, it's about my mum. She forces me to take part in horrific, unnatural acts like... *sob*... Flamenco!"

21/12/20 8:02:33

Nature news: Tin Man shows he has a heart by finding a touching use for his incontinence problem.

18/12/20 12:01:05

"When I said 'launch' the new model..."

28/11/20 12:01:24

When it comes to the new model, he's out to lunch. --Willie Johnson

"We peeped inside - full of toad stools!"

22/11/20 8:38:05

''Yes, it needs emptying. There's not mushroom inside.''(Lonnie Donegan) --Dave Bryan

"These are British caught, sir. They are lightly simmered in resentment and served with small island mentality dressing and a side order of entitlement."

14/11/20 8:00:52

fo --Lucky Elperro

'Do you have any idea how long it took me to lick this lot clean?'

12/11/20 20:01:06

"I'm squashed!"

01/11/20 8:01:25

"Bloody replacement bus service..."

18/10/20 11:46:00

Can't caption this. I only do one-liners.

12/10/20 18:11:51

When you have to share a set of headphones but it's fine because you were a bit chilly anyway.

22/09/20 11:01:52

"Excuse me. Did you know you have a bear behind?"

21/09/20 11:00:15

"Ann's in the shower. I'm, er... looking after her knickers."

16/09/20 11:24:05

"Is that a mark on your specs?"

"Don't be silly. It's a Dave."

06/09/20 19:04:15

Or maybe a Nick? --Willie Johnson

You can't always spot a drug addict but you can look for the signs.

01/09/20 12:03:35

Pygmies - delicious but completely indigestable.

27/08/20 7:01:06

SpongeBob Despair Pants.

09/08/20 19:02:33

Daz: gets everything out. Including your son.

31/07/20 19:45:24

This is my guide dog, Maverick. He's more like my pilot. He's a good boy except for that time he tried to dry hump Kelly McGillis.

20/07/20 7:03:34

Who hasn't? --Scrijjy Doo

The leader of the Green Party's last wish was to be recycled as a hand dryer.

19/07/20 11:10:20

Ted never ran a bath for anyone but himself. He was a selfish bath Ted.

17/07/20 7:22:57

He's so Independent these days!

Tue 12:00:29

"You know that 'rare cat' you bought online during lockdown..."

Sat 12:31:46

It was in disguise. --Willie Johnson

Mr and Mrs Jumbo opted for a private delivery which included a hefty bill.

10/02/21 20:00:24

America finally drops the C-bomb

29/01/21 12:00:11

"When I remove my hand, the ball and I will be gone and you will be back in the room...3...2..."

25/01/21 8:01:19

"Is that new hand sanitiser any good, Paul?"

"Yeah, it's wild rose and lily of the valley. Really lovely. Have a sniff."

25/01/21 8:00:26

I'll never forget the day I actually married the old bag!

24/01/21 20:00:08

I'll never forget the NIGHT... she said paper or plastic? --Mauris Iocus

Democracy beating nationalism latest pole reveals. Trump claims pole is bent.

24/01/21 9:09:08

He's asking for a recount. --Willie Johnson

Weeding glasses

23/01/21 20:00:06

Bobcat Marley

21/01/21 12:04:13

"Oi, Friday!... Friday!?... FRIDAY!!?"

"It's Wednesday actually!"

"Well, I don't know! Every day's the bloody same in lockdown!"

15/01/21 20:00:15

Jim wanted a Zoom background which reflected the full joy of lockdown.

10/01/21 17:47:30

Final drop of the day!

05/01/21 8:27:32

Fly Guy

13/12/20 8:18:47

27/11/20 20:01:05

Shaky connection.

26/11/20 8:57:52

Daily Star: 'My baby ate a ghost!'

24/11/20 22:12:41

Was it a phantom pregnancy? --Neil Mackenzie

"Ah, look at these Brexit quotes! Remember this one - 'We hold all the cards'?"

12/11/20 12:21:23

And then I realised I had the decimal point in the wrong place and I'd actually discovered a cure for cancer. Which was nice.

12/10/20 17:27:39

"Ding Dong! The Witch Is Dead!"

- Some of the celebrations after the passing of Margaret Thatcher were well over the top

30/09/20 7:15:22

Unbridled passion

29/09/20 19:00:11

"NO VOTES! NO VOTES!? THREE HOURS I SPENT ON THAT F*@KING CAPTION!!"

23/09/20 19:03:04

Ha ha, your loss :-D --Glyn Evans

Lion'll Glare

21/09/20 7:00:21

"I'll name that loon in one.":^) --Crunchy Chords

Scarecrowd

20/09/20 11:00:07

Proclaimers - If you must walk 500 miles and then walk 500 more, at least have the sense to take some sandwiches.

18/09/20 7:00:10

PM outlines plans for the Affordable Housing Scheme that's set to deliver thousands of homes in England.

11/09/20 11:15:08

clever

A high grey building...
A bird gets ready to fly,
Wait! Caption forming.

(High Coo)

02/09/20 21:38:23

The writing's on the Gaul.

25/08/20 21:01:40

"Sorry about the mix-up boys. I've cancelled Rentokil now."

31/07/20 14:34:40

"Your new garden water feature is very simple to install..."

26/07/20 21:22:46

Wingledon

24/07/20 11:58:00

lol

Jeff's 'cavorting in nature' portfolio shot was photobombed by an inconsiderate bride and groom.

23/07/20 16:44:21

The time you discover it's never a Mars bar.

12/07/20 19:02:48

'I hear you have a fine case of crabs', said Salty hopefully.

11/07/20 20:02:20

Toilet Paper

Tue 12:00:06

"Got anything stronger?"

"Sorry mate, we don't serve alcohol to mynahs."

Tue 8:00:22

lol

"Wish I hadn't given my Snickers to that grumpy penguin."

18/02/21 13:08:59

Reader Digests

10/02/21 12:01:52

♪ Working at the cur wash ♪

09/02/21 12:00:07

It's been a hard day's knit.

09/02/21 8:00:08

Monkey see monkey brew.

04/02/21 20:00:15

Fake moos

31/01/21 8:00:14

Genetic Mootation

31/01/21 8:00:07

Titanic Photoshop errors and how to avoid them.

29/01/21 8:09:59

Herbie Goes to Rehab

28/01/21 20:00:25

There's nothing like half a pint of Weird Beard and some vegan pork scratchings for £25 in the good old Hipster's Arms.

24/01/21 12:00:28

creative

"I know he doesn't look much like a police dog but he's special branch."

20/01/21 8:03:02

Unfortunately, his detective work was just basically sniffing around. Commanded to go on the paper, he's taken his leaves of absence. --Mauris Iocus

clever

* Stuffed pigeons courtesy of Joe Le Taxidermist.

17/01/21 8:01:06

It's where the bums hang out.

16/01/21 20:04:23

"Earlier on today, apparently, a woman rang the BBC and said she heard there was snow on the way. Well, if you're watching, don't worry, there isn't!", said Michael Fish.

14/01/21 12:04:43

*Face only - must supply own red neck.

13/01/21 8:03:51

"He's only got thirteen left you know."

"What, days in office?"

"No, brain cells!"

07/01/21 20:01:27

"Mr Hulk? Your new toupee is ready."

04/01/21 20:01:13

"You Wouldn't Like Me When I'm Angry" (Line from the Incredible Hulk) I wouldn't like you anyway. (An ill advised retort) --Willie Johnson

Bamboozer

24/12/20 12:00:33

"How will I recognise EU?"

10/12/20 20:16:56

Jane's flatulence was horrendous when under strain.

01/12/20 20:00:19

Now, there's something you don't see everyday - workmen working.

30/11/20 12:01:18

Later, Gerald was admitted to the mynah injuries unit.

25/11/20 12:00:53

creative

"STOP! Get away from the sea, John!!"

"Why? What's wrong?"

"There are microplastics everywhere and you may ingest some, eventually increasing your risk of certain types of cancer!"

"Oh, god! Thanks for warning me!"

23/11/20 20:23:19

Lavatree

22/11/20 8:00:07

If you can afford more than this at Christmas, Rishi Sunak would like to speak to you...

13/11/20 8:00:12

They attracted a lot of stares. Daleks hate stares.

09/11/20 20:45:22

Judge Dead

02/11/20 13:13:42

Where's the sad emoji when you need it? --Willie Johnson

Barry's just finished a Marathon. Also a Twix, two Mars Bars and a family bag of Doritos. Which should, he thought, provide enough energy to get him to the pub.

21/10/20 19:00:30

"Your name vill also go on ze list! Vhat is it?"

"Don't tell him, Pike!"

19/10/20 19:00:30

GrOAP

14/10/20 11:26:54

"I had such a strange, unrealistic dream last night."

"The one with the wierd floating face, sinister forest and a crow?"

"No, I dreamt Boris Johnson was competent."

30/09/20 11:06:31

Ouch, that reminds me of an extraordinary one I had some years ago, where I was best friends with Amber Rudd and we were enjoying a bottle of wine together. Very alarming! --Molly R

Traffic News - there's a pile-up on the A20 tree.

08/09/20 19:00:14

Fred had been kind and generous but was easily cornered and surprisingly tasty.

28/08/20 7:00:14

Jimmy Krankie started right at the bottom you know.

27/08/20 7:01:55

The arsecrack of Notre Dame

25/08/20 19:12:34

Never before seen photos reveal the set of The Golden Girls after Rose got loaded and went on the rampage.

18/08/20 7:02:45

Everyone remembers where they were when they first saw 'Golden Girls Gone Wild'. --Michael Winner

"Now see here, sister. I'm a desperate man. So are you gonna tell me where the gents is or what?"

16/08/20 19:05:47

more captions

last comments (total: 214)

Please don't mock the weak.

[anon]

14/02/21
12:04pm

comment on caption:
The King and IN [Al Overy]

There are QAnon members on here? - Actually, scratch that otherwise it might start some silly conspiracy

Glyn Evans

15/02/21
1:04pm

comment on caption:
Anon just had time to post some irrelevant pro-Trump material on a popular caption site before kickoff. [Al Overy]

More virulent than covid, TDS (Trump Derangement Syndrome) was still spreading around the world. Even months after the election, Trump madness still gripped their every waking moment.

[anon]

16/02/21
11:53am

comment on caption:
"Hello, is that Chris Beach? Listen, I won the January Caption competition bigly and everyone knows it! SO FIND MY MISSING VOTES!!!" [Al Overy]

"Listen, all I need you to do is find me 25 more votes, or I won't like you as much. Stop the steal."
Signed, anon voter