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| Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | |
| Captions | 8 | 15 | #10 | 32 | 43 | #13 | 15570 | 24345 | #3 |
| Comments | 1 | 1 | 222 | 105 | #36 | ||||
| Forum Posts | 1 | ||||||||
Ian Skelding
signed up: 11 years, 3 months ago
profile viewed: 345 time(s) this week
caption quota: 42
caption votes given since joining: 7,020
comment quota: 20
comment votes given since joining: 145
super vote quota: 0
Retired Woodwind instrumental teacher, married, son Andrew and daughter Rachelle Rhienne a 26 old professional singer/songwriter who now has her own original material as well as covers on You Tube and Soundcloud.
Location: Alexandria
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"Look, there's some nosy bastard looking through our letterbox." 15/03/13 21:00:00 |
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Well done for thinking out of the (letter) box. --Smuldo
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It was a nice gesture by the Bulgarian Police Force to give informer Alexander Keepoff a Memorial. 03/09/15 20:00:10 |
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31/05/18 20:00:17 |
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03/10/11 11:00:16 |
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Great on the parcel shelf of a car. 23/05/18 14:08:30 |
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You got the record for "the longest fuse" on a caption:45 seconds before I got it...Congrats!!! --Greg Curtis
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"Right, that's curry sauce, mango chutney, basmati rice, onion bhaji, poppadoms and a Nan." 15/03/20 12:57:09 |
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02/01/17 20:25:25 |
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That is the best caption for some time. Nice work. --Dan Nicholls
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20/02/14 12:00:13 |
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In 3D --John Glover
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18/09/20 12:18:06 |
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The Invisible Man gets a right good kicking. 12/06/18 20:00:13 |
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"Bloody hell Jim, now you put the toilet seat down." 05/11/17 12:01:38 |
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"He needs a clip around the ears." 16/02/17 20:01:30 |
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Curiously, our local barber shop is actually called a Clip Around The Ears. --Pussy Galore
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"Sonja, for chrissakes, pull the cord." 25/01/16 8:04:44 |
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Without your brilliant buildup, this caption would have fallen flat. (No pun intended.) Nice job!!! --Greg Curtis
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There's always one practical joker outside a Mosque. 11/08/14 8:08:55 |
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Bless my sole. --John Glover
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"Ground control to Ginger Tom" 14/04/14 20:08:28 |
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Ginger Tom perhaps? Would get my vote:) --Zac Kramer
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17/03/14 9:23:37 |
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"Not much longer now sweetheart, you're nearly dry." 08/08/13 9:01:23 |
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Nice caption. A true laugh... --HillHermit Studios
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16/06/20 20:07:13 |
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I think she sees a cat. --Willie Johnson
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Not the first time Julia had pants around her head. 21/07/18 8:35:09 |
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Took me ages to get this one. Very good caption 😂 --Ethy
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09/09/14 8:00:08 |
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Relief as Rivers drops six foot. 05/09/14 8:14:33 |
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Ouch!..though I'd bet that she'd have found it funny. --Ron Allan
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29/07/14 9:04:33 |
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19/05/19 9:06:58 |
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26/02/19 8:05:26 |
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"My husband loves my paintings but he has no idea where my inspiration comes from." 17/11/18 9:55:11 |
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04/02/17 12:06:17 |
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Too obvious --Polymorph .
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"You sing great, do you play any instruments?" 29/08/15 8:12:43 |
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01/02/15 20:34:05 |
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Unbeatable caption, you just need to put the lid on and then you've nailed it!..ho ho ha ha --Tiny Alien
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"Who put the bloody underfloor heating to maximum?" 03/01/13 9:41:17 |
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"At least we can rule out a heart attack Doc." 13/11/12 8:05:48 |
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30/07/14 12:21:41 |
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Just ' Bags under the eyes ' would get my vote. --John Glover
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"Bobby, have you put away your skatebo .. arrrh?" 02/04/14 20:14:15 |
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"Could someone put the Ariel in please?" 08/01/13 8:04:18 |
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"Bloody Humans have pulled the wipers off." 01/09/12 12:04:17 |
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17/05/12 13:37:00 |
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28/10/11 20:08:06 |
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"Damn, I wish I used a frying pan instead of nutting him." 04/04/21 12:53:36 |
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God, it was bloody hard work being one of Picasso's models. 11/03/21 20:15:21 |
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If you think this is bad, you should see Picasso's brush. --Willie Johnson
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"Get your r's over here and correct that sign." 17/04/20 12:20:30 |
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"She can't sing but when the wind is in the right direction she's a damned good whistler." 15/02/20 9:52:36 |
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"Would you like flies with that?" 11/09/18 12:11:10 |
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07/08/16 20:28:57 |
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Pie in the sky. --Michael Monkhouse
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"You think that's bad, he's doing Coq au Vin tomorrow." 13/06/16 8:11:15 |
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AWESOME. --Michael Monkhouse
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28/02/16 9:15:24 |
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brilliant --[anon]
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"See Debs, told you it was a good idea to keep the Umbilical cord." 23/09/15 8:00:13 |
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"OK, switch it off, I think she's dead." 18/11/14 21:07:20 |
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I LOVE a caption that - with just a few words - suddenly releases a compelling moment in a story. --Greg Curtis
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"Yep, I think we can allow him to go into the pub." 04/04/21 20:00:15 |
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Peter was glad last night's full moon phase was nearly over. 14/08/20 8:08:37 |
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06/03/20 21:00:25 |
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"I love your Bush." 21/02/20 12:08:14 |
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Tom Cruise before the CGI and editing. 01/06/19 20:36:13 |
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18/03/19 20:12:58 |
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22/09/18 8:42:23 |
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06/05/18 12:56:25 |
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20/08/17 20:00:08 |
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31/01/17 8:00:34 |
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"You've made yourself COMPLETELY CLEAR." --Greg Curtis
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"This will be the first time I tried this Sir, the Hindenburg brandy flambe cocktail ... enjoy." 24/09/15 20:33:37 |
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Brilliant. Showcased on the Caption.Me Facebook page --Chris Beach
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"We're going to induce you Mrs Jones, we think twenty years overdue is long enough." 28/03/15 12:00:11 |
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01/03/15 12:04:10 |
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Soon as the coast is clear...they'll be dune it. --Greg Curtis
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17/08/14 9:03:00 |
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Tree's Company? --Michael Monkhouse
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09/04/14 8:16:43 |
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You just beat me by 5 hours 14 minutes and 56 seconds. --John Glover
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23/01/14 8:00:10 |
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His bark is worse than his bite. 05/04/13 8:00:07 |
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26/01/13 20:05:51 |
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A set meal for toe? --Cath Jones
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03/07/12 20:12:58 |
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£50 I heard it flew the grapevine. 22/07/11 11:08:26 |
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13/01/21 8:41:26 |
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08/05/20 12:32:18 |
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Princess Margarets tiara comes up for auction. 22/10/19 8:06:02 |
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06/10/19 12:53:57 |
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07/11/17 8:00:11 |
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"Yes Mum, he has a car and a house." 04/05/17 20:03:15 |
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20/04/17 16:19:16 |
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31/03/17 8:04:32 |
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"Two raspberry nipples please." 06/01/17 12:29:25 |
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Norman Bates, the signs were there. 30/09/15 8:03:13 |
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There was a lovely Stuart Francis line: I didn't want to think my dad stole from lollipop ladies, but the signs were there. --Michael Monkhouse
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Julie loved to fool people into thinking there was a train coming. 14/07/15 20:07:35 |
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Brilliant. --Michael Monkhouse
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10/02/15 17:40:34 |
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02/09/14 8:05:21 |
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I assume the title is on the 'upcoming' photo, if like myself, the captioneer doesn't look at them, then how are you supposed to know? --John Glover
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The new Channel 4 reality show for celebrity children, Extreme Paper Round. 06/01/13 8:38:58 |
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18/11/12 8:00:11 |
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16/07/14 12:11:28 |
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05/05/14 8:00:12 |
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Dave loses his head and throws a wobbly. 29/12/13 8:43:36 |
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"Take it easy Bellboy, I only asked you to take my luggage upstairs." 14/11/13 9:24:20 |
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26/02/13 20:00:07 |
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She's going to take a dive in the Forth. 06/10/12 10:01:54 |
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"Don't panic sis, I said 'insect.'" 25/05/12 11:07:36 |
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19/02/12 11:56:17 |
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"Is it OK or Hello?" 07/01/12 20:13:15 |
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25/10/11 20:00:13 |
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03/03/21 12:11:54 |
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"I need your clothes, your boots and your. ..... could you call me a cab?" 22/02/21 20:54:22 |
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OK, "You're a cab." --Willie Johnson
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'Tortoise wins race.' 22/01/21 12:20:26 |
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14/09/20 8:33:39 |
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2019 : Lazy bugger 05/06/20 9:44:56 |
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"Are you going to take the bus?" 29/04/20 12:02:55 |
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26/04/19 21:03:20 |
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11/11/18 12:13:03 |
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Ouch! --Scrappy Doo
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21/10/18 20:00:09 |
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"Mr Smith, I said 'keep taking the pills'." 27/06/18 8:02:57 |
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"He always preferred his digs to be on the top floor." 20/08/17 9:31:29 |
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12/07/17 12:15:59 |
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13/02/17 13:04:29 |
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"Dip yer headlights yer Bastard." 15/05/15 8:09:25 |
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"You've been to that bloody market again, haven't you?" 22/02/15 20:36:33 |
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30/11/14 12:05:19 |
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Apparently this is where Jeremy Clarkson had spotted the Argies. 24/10/14 22:35:06 |
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20/02/21 20:27:02 |
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"I am in the pub but I haven't started drinking yet." --Willie Johnson
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30/09/20 9:39:49 |
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Tom later moved onto bigger furniture but unfortunately suffered from a slipped desk." 21/08/20 8:40:45 |
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15/08/20 20:08:34 |
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"Of course it's safe, President Trump sanctioned it." 10/08/20 20:41:14 |
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10/07/20 12:33:44 |
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09/03/20 20:32:10 |
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"Can you see my ribs?" 19/05/19 20:11:19 |
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20/04/19 20:03:48 |
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07/04/19 12:22:45 |
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Pollygone maybe? --John Glover
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06/01/19 20:20:59 |
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07/10/18 12:05:13 |
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"Could I have bunions with that please?" 18/08/18 12:00:53 |
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07/08/18 20:52:40 |
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" ... and take your damn books with you." 30/05/18 20:10:24 |
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it's rude to eat with your elbows on the table ... send 30/04/18 8:11:01 |
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"Ahh, look Charles, he's got your ears." 10/12/17 20:06:39 |
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09/08/16 12:16:58 |
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"... and there was a buffet on the train." 29/05/16 16:20:51 |
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 04/04/16 20:20:52 |
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22/03/16 20:10:11 |
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28/02/16 20:00:17 |
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Fever, fever, you give me fever.. --[anon]
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"Will someone put a pilau under her head?" 12/01/16 20:07:17 |
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20/09/15 9:05:13 |
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Bloody Bingo machine's bust again. 28/08/15 8:09:01 |
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11/07/15 8:00:13 |
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"Here's the Catholic converter." 27/05/15 8:01:18 |
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14/05/15 8:05:55 |
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09/04/15 8:00:09 |
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 23/03/15 8:05:51 |
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03/03/15 9:21:27 |
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02/01/15 8:02:44 |
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14/11/14 12:58:38 |
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"Not yet Imran, you're not her husband until tomorrow." 17/10/14 9:27:46 |
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"Ahh, there's nothing like a bit of soft lighting." 11/10/14 12:25:49 |
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29/09/14 8:07:46 |
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Introducing the powerful suction of Siemens. 10/09/14 16:35:43 |
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Bob's mates were gutted for him. 15/07/14 12:24:21 |
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Apparently it gets 6 inches bigger in Summer. 27/05/13 20:13:58 |
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Love it. don't think you need...she loves that --John Glover
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Ray Reardon was really attached to his snooker cue. 26/05/13 12:00:08 |
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01/01/13 12:16:16 |
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04/11/12 20:21:14 |
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04/08/12 11:23:40 |
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13/03/12 20:19:10 |
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"You see Doctor, he keeps wetting himself." 30/12/11 11:43:43 |
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21/10/11 20:49:31 |
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18/10/11 20:00:11 |
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04/10/14 12:00:30 |
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29/09/14 8:01:10 |
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"We ordered lintels you idiot." 27/05/14 16:13:12 |
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22/05/14 20:20:30 |
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28/04/14 8:00:27 |
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17/04/14 20:05:20 |
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"Christ, this light's taking a long time to change to green." 03/04/14 22:06:40 |
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♫ If you wallaby my lover ♫ 25/03/14 14:01:21 |
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26/02/14 8:06:39 |
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An excrement addition to any dish. 19/02/14 12:21:52 |
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16/02/14 12:48:32 |
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"Nicolas, they won't go away if you keep looking through the letterbox." 22/01/14 8:07:16 |
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16/08/13 8:15:56 |
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"Why are you wearing the tablecloth? ..... and where's my antique walnut table?" 14/08/13 16:24:38 |
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People from North career into people coming from the South. 14/04/13 12:22:30 |
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Blimey, this is a bit sluggish. 26/03/13 8:02:15 |
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God, I hate doing these toothpaste adverts." 24/03/13 20:24:29 |
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That's just giving the wrong Signal --John Llamas
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05/08/11 12:49:33 |
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"You're not going to learn anything by sitting under Apple trees all day Isaac." 08/01/21 20:24:07 |
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"Keep looking girls, his ear's got to be around here somewhere." 08/11/20 22:31:16 |
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23/07/20 20:32:43 |
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"Bloody hell, that's a powerful Hoover the people in the flat above have got." 27/04/20 12:19:36 |
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"Over the years you wouldn't believe how many times we've had to re-build that wall." 05/04/20 20:11:54 |
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20/03/20 20:14:17 |
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07/10/19 20:52:46 |
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22/08/19 8:05:17 |
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"Don't believe those reviews on Trip Advisor, Area 51's a dump." 21/08/19 15:36:48 |
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"It reached 45 degrees in Paris today." 28/07/19 7:52:09 |
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"That's the fifth one today, I think we should get them to turn the electric fence off." 11/05/19 9:11:29 |
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24/03/19 12:09:23 |
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05/03/19 8:03:39 |
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17/10/18 12:17:48 |
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Makes a change from yellow pages! --Karyn Harrison
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06/06/18 8:00:40 |
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03/11/17 20:09:58 |
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06/10/17 20:00:12 |
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" ... and here comes the World Darts Champion." 26/06/17 20:56:35 |
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20/05/17 9:47:16 |
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" ... and now on BBC2 Planet Earth for the hard of hearing." 14/04/17 20:38:23 |
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Cycle race abandoned due to road blocks. 28/03/17 8:08:45 |
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21/03/17 20:14:36 |
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Joe was having his first contraction. 08/01/17 9:35:55 |
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With all this excitement James couldn't contain himself. 07/11/16 8:00:11 |
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"I told you to get the dog spayed you idiot." 22/05/16 12:28:42 |
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"Idiot, I said I wanted his phone tapped." 13/03/16 12:24:19 |
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How is being helpful to a fellow captioneer being a 'sad tossa'. By the way, that should be 'tosser'. --[anon]
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31/12/15 9:37:03 |
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more captions
From which side of the border?
8:10am
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
Northern Ireland
8:12am
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
Ah, Yes! I forgot about the sea wall
8:13am
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
Nobody would know it's there. Have they reached the surface yet?
8:18am
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
Yes. Just coming up for Eire
8:27am
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
I wouldn't know, no one harps on about it
8:51pm
comment on caption:
Preparations for Scottish Independence already underway. [Ian Skelding]
Maybe it's just conservative. It leans to the right.
8:50am
comment on caption:
"Why did you put an extra 20psi into the passenger side tyres?" [Ian Skelding]
What do reckon now Willie? 20psi?
9:29am
comment on caption:
"Why did you put an extra 20psi into the passenger side tyres?" [Ian Skelding]
to BE or not to be?
1:12pm
comment on caption:
"They're to eggshumed next week." [Ian Skelding]
have you misplaced a "knock knock?"
6:11pm
comment on caption:
🎵 Knockin' on Oven's Door 🎵 [Ian Skelding]