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| Captions | 15 | 22 | #10 | 35 | 84 | #4 | 15084 | 23523 | #3 |
| Comments | 216 | 101 | #36 | ||||||
| Forum Posts | 1 | ||||||||
Ian Skelding
signed up: 11 years ago
profile viewed: 9 time(s) this week
caption quota: 43
votes given since joining: 6,815
super vote quota: 0
Retired Woodwind instrumental teacher, married, son Andrew and daughter Rachelle Rhienne a 26 old professional singer/songwriter who now has her own original material as well as covers on You Tube and Soundcloud.
Location: Alexandria
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captions
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"Look, there's some nosy bastard looking through our letterbox." 15/03/13 21:00:00 |
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Well done for thinking out of the (letter) box. --Smuldo
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It was a nice gesture by the Bulgarian Police Force to give informer Alexander Keepoff a Memorial. 03/09/15 19:00:10 |
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31/05/18 19:00:17 |
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03/10/11 10:00:16 |
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Great on the parcel shelf of a car. 23/05/18 13:08:30 |
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You got the record for "the longest fuse" on a caption:45 seconds before I got it...Congrats!!! --Greg Curtis
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"Right, that's curry sauce, mango chutney, basmati rice, onion bhaji, poppadoms and a Nan." 15/03/20 12:57:09 |
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02/01/17 20:25:25 |
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That is the best caption for some time. Nice work. --Dan Nicholls
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20/02/14 12:00:13 |
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In 3D --John Glover
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18/09/20 11:18:06 |
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The Invisible Man gets a right good kicking. 12/06/18 19:00:13 |
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"Bloody hell Jim, now you put the toilet seat down." 05/11/17 12:01:38 |
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"He needs a clip around the ears." 16/02/17 20:01:30 |
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Curiously, our local barber shop is actually called a Clip Around The Ears. --Pussy Galore
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"Sonja, for chrissakes, pull the cord." 25/01/16 8:04:44 |
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Without your brilliant buildup, this caption would have fallen flat. (No pun intended.) Nice job!!! --Greg Curtis
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There's always one practical joker outside a Mosque. 11/08/14 7:08:55 |
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Bless my sole. --John Glover
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"Ground control to Ginger Tom" 14/04/14 19:08:28 |
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Ginger Tom perhaps? Would get my vote:) --Zac Kramer
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17/03/14 9:23:37 |
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"Not much longer now sweetheart, you're nearly dry." 08/08/13 8:01:23 |
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Nice caption. A true laugh... --HillHermit Studios
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16/06/20 19:07:13 |
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I think she sees a cat. --Willie Johnson
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Not the first time Julia had pants around her head. 21/07/18 7:35:09 |
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Took me ages to get this one. Very good caption 😂 --Ethy
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09/09/14 7:00:08 |
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Relief as Rivers drops six foot. 05/09/14 7:14:33 |
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Ouch!..though I'd bet that she'd have found it funny. --Ron Allan
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29/07/14 8:04:33 |
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19/05/19 8:06:58 |
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26/02/19 8:05:26 |
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"My husband loves my paintings but he has no idea where my inspiration comes from." 17/11/18 9:55:11 |
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04/02/17 12:06:17 |
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Too obvious --Polymorph .
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"You sing great, do you play any instruments?" 29/08/15 7:12:43 |
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01/02/15 20:34:05 |
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Unbeatable caption, you just need to put the lid on and then you've nailed it!..ho ho ha ha --Tiny Alien
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"Who put the bloody underfloor heating to maximum?" 03/01/13 9:41:17 |
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"At least we can rule out a heart attack Doc." 13/11/12 8:05:48 |
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30/07/14 11:21:41 |
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Just ' Bags under the eyes ' would get my vote. --John Glover
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"Bobby, have you put away your skatebo .. arrrh?" 02/04/14 19:14:15 |
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"Could someone put the Ariel in please?" 08/01/13 8:04:18 |
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"Bloody Humans have pulled the wipers off." 01/09/12 11:04:17 |
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17/05/12 12:37:00 |
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28/10/11 19:08:06 |
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"Get your r's over here and correct that sign." 17/04/20 11:20:30 |
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"She can't sing but when the wind is in the right direction she's a damned good whistler." 15/02/20 9:52:36 |
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"Would you like flies with that?" 11/09/18 11:11:10 |
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07/08/16 19:28:57 |
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Pie in the sky. --Michael Monkhouse
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"You think that's bad, he's doing Coq au Vin tomorrow." 13/06/16 7:11:15 |
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AWESOME. --Michael Monkhouse
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28/02/16 9:15:24 |
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brilliant --[anon]
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"See Debs, told you it was a good idea to keep the Umbilical cord." 23/09/15 7:00:13 |
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"OK, switch it off, I think she's dead." 18/11/14 21:07:20 |
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I LOVE a caption that - with just a few words - suddenly releases a compelling moment in a story. --Greg Curtis
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Peter was glad last night's full moon phase was nearly over. 14/08/20 7:08:37 |
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06/03/20 21:00:25 |
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"I love your Bush." 21/02/20 12:08:14 |
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Tom Cruise before the CGI and editing. 01/06/19 19:36:13 |
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18/03/19 20:12:58 |
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22/09/18 7:42:23 |
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06/05/18 11:56:25 |
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20/08/17 19:00:08 |
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31/01/17 8:00:34 |
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"You've made yourself COMPLETELY CLEAR." --Greg Curtis
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"This will be the first time I tried this Sir, the Hindenburg brandy flambe cocktail ... enjoy." 24/09/15 19:33:37 |
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Brilliant. Showcased on the Caption.Me Facebook page --Chris Beach
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"We're going to induce you Mrs Jones, we think twenty years overdue is long enough." 28/03/15 12:00:11 |
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01/03/15 12:04:10 |
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Soon as the coast is clear...they'll be dune it. --Greg Curtis
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17/08/14 8:03:00 |
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Tree's Company? --Michael Monkhouse
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09/04/14 7:16:43 |
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You just beat me by 5 hours 14 minutes and 56 seconds. --John Glover
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23/01/14 8:00:10 |
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His bark is worse than his bite. 05/04/13 7:00:07 |
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26/01/13 20:05:51 |
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A set meal for toe? --Cath Jones
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03/07/12 19:12:58 |
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£50 I heard it flew the grapevine. 22/07/11 10:08:26 |
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Wed 8:41:26 |
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08/05/20 11:32:18 |
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Princess Margarets tiara comes up for auction. 22/10/19 7:06:02 |
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06/10/19 11:53:57 |
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07/11/17 8:00:11 |
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"Yes Mum, he has a car and a house." 04/05/17 19:03:15 |
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20/04/17 15:19:16 |
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31/03/17 7:04:32 |
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"Two raspberry nipples please." 06/01/17 12:29:25 |
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Norman Bates, the signs were there. 30/09/15 7:03:13 |
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There was a lovely Stuart Francis line: I didn't want to think my dad stole from lollipop ladies, but the signs were there. --Michael Monkhouse
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Julie loved to fool people into thinking there was a train coming. 14/07/15 19:07:35 |
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Brilliant. --Michael Monkhouse
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10/02/15 17:40:34 |
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02/09/14 7:05:21 |
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I assume the title is on the 'upcoming' photo, if like myself, the captioneer doesn't look at them, then how are you supposed to know? --John Glover
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The new Channel 4 reality show for celebrity children, Extreme Paper Round. 06/01/13 8:38:58 |
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18/11/12 8:00:11 |
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16/07/14 11:11:28 |
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05/05/14 7:00:12 |
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Dave loses his head and throws a wobbly. 29/12/13 8:43:36 |
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"Take it easy Bellboy, I only asked you to take my luggage upstairs." 14/11/13 9:24:20 |
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26/02/13 20:00:07 |
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She's going to take a dive in the Forth. 06/10/12 9:01:54 |
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"Don't panic sis, I said 'insect.'" 25/05/12 10:07:36 |
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19/02/12 11:56:17 |
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"Is it OK or Hello?" 07/01/12 20:13:15 |
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25/10/11 19:00:13 |
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14/09/20 7:33:39 |
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2019 : Lazy bugger 05/06/20 8:44:56 |
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"Are you going to take the bus?" 29/04/20 11:02:55 |
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26/04/19 20:03:20 |
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11/11/18 12:13:03 |
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Ouch! --Scrappy Doo
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21/10/18 19:00:09 |
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"Mr Smith, I said 'keep taking the pills'." 27/06/18 7:02:57 |
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"He always preferred his digs to be on the top floor." 20/08/17 8:31:29 |
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12/07/17 11:15:59 |
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13/02/17 13:04:29 |
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"Dip yer headlights yer Bastard." 15/05/15 7:09:25 |
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"You've been to that bloody market again, haven't you?" 22/02/15 20:36:33 |
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30/11/14 12:05:19 |
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Apparently this is where Jeremy Clarkson had spotted the Argies. 24/10/14 21:35:06 |
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30/09/20 8:39:49 |
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Tom later moved onto bigger furniture but unfortunately suffered from a slipped desk." 21/08/20 7:40:45 |
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15/08/20 19:08:34 |
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"Of course it's safe, President Trump sanctioned it." 10/08/20 19:41:14 |
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10/07/20 11:33:44 |
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09/03/20 20:32:10 |
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"Can you see my ribs?" 19/05/19 19:11:19 |
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20/04/19 19:03:48 |
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07/04/19 11:22:45 |
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Pollygone maybe? --John Glover
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06/01/19 20:20:59 |
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07/10/18 11:05:13 |
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"Could I have bunions with that please?" 18/08/18 11:00:53 |
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07/08/18 19:52:40 |
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" ... and take your damn books with you." 30/05/18 19:10:24 |
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it's rude to eat with your elbows on the table ... send 30/04/18 7:11:01 |
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"Ahh, look Charles, he's got your ears." 10/12/17 20:06:39 |
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09/08/16 11:16:58 |
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"... and there was a buffet on the train." 29/05/16 15:20:51 |
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 04/04/16 19:20:52 |
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22/03/16 20:10:11 |
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28/02/16 20:00:17 |
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Fever, fever, you give me fever.. --[anon]
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"Will someone put a pilau under her head?" 12/01/16 20:07:17 |
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20/09/15 8:05:13 |
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Bloody Bingo machine's bust again. 28/08/15 7:09:01 |
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11/07/15 7:00:13 |
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"Here's the Catholic converter." 27/05/15 7:01:18 |
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14/05/15 7:05:55 |
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09/04/15 7:00:09 |
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 23/03/15 8:05:51 |
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03/03/15 9:21:27 |
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02/01/15 8:02:44 |
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14/11/14 12:58:38 |
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"Not yet Imran, you're not her husband until tomorrow." 17/10/14 8:27:46 |
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"Ahh, there's nothing like a bit of soft lighting." 11/10/14 11:25:49 |
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29/09/14 7:07:46 |
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Introducing the powerful suction of Siemens. 10/09/14 15:35:43 |
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Bob's mates were gutted for him. 15/07/14 11:24:21 |
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Apparently it gets 6 inches bigger in Summer. 27/05/13 19:13:58 |
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Love it. don't think you need...she loves that --John Glover
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Ray Reardon was really attached to his snooker cue. 26/05/13 11:00:08 |
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01/01/13 12:16:16 |
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04/11/12 20:21:14 |
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04/08/12 10:23:40 |
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13/03/12 20:19:10 |
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"You see Doctor, he keeps wetting himself." 30/12/11 11:43:43 |
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21/10/11 19:49:31 |
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18/10/11 19:00:11 |
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04/10/14 11:00:30 |
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29/09/14 7:01:10 |
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"We ordered lintels you idiot." 27/05/14 15:13:12 |
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22/05/14 19:20:30 |
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28/04/14 7:00:27 |
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17/04/14 19:05:20 |
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"Christ, this light's taking a long time to change to green." 03/04/14 21:06:40 |
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♫ If you wallaby my lover ♫ 25/03/14 14:01:21 |
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26/02/14 8:06:39 |
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An excrement addition to any dish. 19/02/14 12:21:52 |
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16/02/14 12:48:32 |
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"Nicolas, they won't go away if you keep looking through the letterbox." 22/01/14 8:07:16 |
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16/08/13 7:15:56 |
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"Why are you wearing the tablecloth? ..... and where's my antique walnut table?" 14/08/13 15:24:38 |
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People from North career into people coming from the South. 14/04/13 11:22:30 |
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Blimey, this is a bit sluggish. 26/03/13 8:02:15 |
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God, I hate doing these toothpaste adverts." 24/03/13 20:24:29 |
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That's just giving the wrong Signal --John Llamas
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05/08/11 11:49:33 |
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"You're not going to learn anything by sitting under Apple trees all day Isaac." 08/01/21 20:24:07 |
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"Keep looking girls, his ear's got to be around here somewhere." 08/11/20 22:31:16 |
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23/07/20 19:32:43 |
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"Bloody hell, that's a powerful Hoover the people in the flat above have got." 27/04/20 11:19:36 |
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"Over the years you wouldn't believe how many times we've had to re-build that wall." 05/04/20 19:11:54 |
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20/03/20 20:14:17 |
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07/10/19 19:52:46 |
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22/08/19 7:05:17 |
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"Don't believe those reviews on Trip Advisor, Area 51's a dump." 21/08/19 14:36:48 |
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"It reached 45 degrees in Paris today." 28/07/19 6:52:09 |
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"That's the fifth one today, I think we should get them to turn the electric fence off." 11/05/19 8:11:29 |
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24/03/19 12:09:23 |
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05/03/19 8:03:39 |
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17/10/18 11:17:48 |
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Makes a change from yellow pages! --Karyn Harrison
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06/06/18 7:00:40 |
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03/11/17 20:09:58 |
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06/10/17 19:00:12 |
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" ... and here comes the World Darts Champion." 26/06/17 19:56:35 |
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20/05/17 8:47:16 |
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" ... and now on BBC2 Planet Earth for the hard of hearing." 14/04/17 19:38:23 |
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Cycle race abandoned due to road blocks. 28/03/17 7:08:45 |
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21/03/17 20:14:36 |
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Joe was having his first contraction. 08/01/17 9:35:55 |
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With all this excitement James couldn't contain himself. 07/11/16 8:00:11 |
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"I told you to get the dog spayed you idiot." 22/05/16 11:28:42 |
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"Idiot, I said I wanted his phone tapped." 13/03/16 12:24:19 |
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How is being helpful to a fellow captioneer being a 'sad tossa'. By the way, that should be 'tosser'. --[anon]
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31/12/15 9:37:03 |
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"We'll do a shingle seater next." 03/10/15 19:00:18 |
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Fido was resting on his laurels 06/09/15 19:02:17 |
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22/06/15 19:08:41 |
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"Where's the cycle path Officer?" 09/06/15 7:09:13 |
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14/05/15 7:09:10 |
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"A small Jack Daniels with a splash of water please." 05/04/15 19:13:24 |
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21/03/15 9:57:37 |
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more captions
Even if he has one, wattle he do with it?
9:35pm
comment on caption:
"He needs a comb." [Ian Skelding]
Great caption, I had a similar idea.
11:55am
comment on caption:
"Do you want to play Tern the Bottle?" [Ian Skelding]
Y-fronts, of course!
8:28pm
comment on caption:
"Fancy painting a pair of knickers on the camper van." [Ian Skelding]
A tern for the wurst?
7:21pm
comment on caption:
A tern for the wuss. [Ian Skelding]
Tell that to the Ozone layer
12:46pm
comment on caption:
"That's a MacDonald''s burger without the beef."
"No difference then." [Ian Skelding]
For an army, you'd expect them to be more organised than that. But they never are. It's no wonder the Death Star's not finished in Return of the Jedi.
12:21pm
comment on caption:
These Stormtroopers, they never finish anything they started. [Ian Skelding]
Reminds me of the famous sword fight scene. The story goes that Harrison Ford had the shits and wanted to finish the scene quickly, so he asked if he could just pull out his gun and shoot the big Arab brandishing the scimitar. Spielberg agreed, and movie history was made.
8:38pm
comment on caption:
"Come on Harrison, hurry up, we've got to do another take before dark." [Ian Skelding]
Did you get stuck on his eyes?
8:43pm
comment on caption:
"Took me five years." [Ian Skelding]
Had he gone off the rails?
8:12pm
comment on caption:
"Tom was back on track." [Ian Skelding]
no... lost in them...
10:57pm
comment on caption:
"Took me five years." [Ian Skelding]