
Mark England
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Captions | 7 | 17 | #20 | 15 | 52 | #9 | 7644 | 20981 | #9 |
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Comments | 1 | 1 | 330 | 335 | #24 | ||||
Forum Posts | 1 | 4 |
caption quota: 75
caption votes given since joining: 13,394
comment quota: 6
comment votes given since joining: 201
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captions
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12/03/14 12:37:33 |
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30/07/13 12:21:55 |
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July's caption of the month, posted to the official caption.me Facebook page. Congrats! --Chris Beach
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27/04/20 12:12:35 |
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03/04/20 8:09:53 |
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02/05/19 8:16:05 |
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21/10/16 12:54:20 |
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18/09/12 20:10:56 |
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"Flippin' hell, Edmund, Who cares if it's creased? Just stick the flag in the bloody summit" 24/06/19 20:30:04 |
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Never try to leave a barbers without paying 01/07/21 12:19:39 |
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Great caption Mark but I think Al Overy deserved a nod for being first to come up with the barber idea which hadn't occurred to me. --Stephen Bean
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01/10/18 20:04:56 |
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I'm absolutely thrilled. Thanks to everyone for the votes and kind comments --Mark England
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In his younger days, Don King had a fetish for licking squirrels arses 23/01/17 20:16:38 |
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It's based on Don King's unique hairstyle --Mark England
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27/08/13 20:01:41 |
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30/09/21 20:52:45 |
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Pmsl --Karen Oakenfull
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Traffic news: The B345 has virtually come to a standstill due to Fogg 08/09/21 12:15:15 |
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Around the M25 in 80 days. Sounds about right. --Dan Nicholls
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22/10/18 20:44:22 |
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It's situated in a close knit community 15/02/17 20:06:24 |
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"John and Paul. The tune's great but could we tweak the lyrics?" 13/09/23 20:03:13 |
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No one is talking about the elephant in the room 30/05/22 8:44:43 |
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18/05/21 12:17:50 |
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Do sailors say clean things when they get Tourette's? --Willie Johnson
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Due to a bagpipe shortage, Luton's 'Scottish Exile Pipe Band' had to improvise 22/05/20 12:12:57 |
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But it was a bit of a Wee Crankie idea. --Woofer 6
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"Good afternoon. Today, we are in Delhi, for the semi finals of the Extreme Jenga Championship.." 30/06/19 12:05:59 |
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"All I did was order a pint of cider" 02/04/16 20:05:57 |
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06/05/23 8:00:54 |
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"Well done Dave. Now that's much better than your previous 'Grab the Cock' sign. 17/02/23 8:05:41 |
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"Gotcha. Caught red-handed. Have you anything to say?" 28/06/21 12:39:48 |
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The relationship ended when Gladys pulled a Mussel 13/04/21 20:45:32 |
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"Come on you two. Smoke break is over. Those chimneys ain't gonna clean themselves" 08/07/20 8:25:57 |
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05/05/20 20:11:08 |
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Rice wine made with fox? Those Japanese will eat anything! 22/03/18 12:09:42 |
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"My nose is running" 24/11/13 20:20:38 |
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lmfao...bravo. --Ross Davidson
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19/09/12 8:01:41 |
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06/09/12 12:10:26 |
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"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" 26/08/23 12:09:32 |
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Feel free to experiment on any of my captions, Dave --Vivvy En
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"Next on Animal Life Swap, we'll see how the Hippos are managing in their bedsit in Swansea" 07/09/21 8:14:09 |
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27/02/21 20:39:51 |
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Great thinking on this one. Love it --The Wolf
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It was at that moment that the magician wished he had used a rabbit 07/07/20 8:03:05 |
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"Hello, I'm Dr Ball. How many mushrooms have you swallowed?" 30/04/20 8:27:16 |
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Some Paralympic events simply do not work 09/04/20 8:35:58 |
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I hate myself, but I can't stop laughing at this. --James Lennox
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"I got rid of that frog in my throat, but I'm still a little hoarse" 16/08/19 12:04:54 |
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"I found it in the road. It's a 'Truck-killed flattypuss'" 19/09/18 8:53:27 |
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07/02/17 12:13:01 |
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"I want peanuts, a size 48 tutu and some sticky buns....or I drop the boy" 10/05/15 12:16:55 |
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in your opinion. --Lucky Elperro
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"I see Spiderman was pissed again last night" 05/04/15 12:00:58 |
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"Good man, you got the razor blade. Now let's see how cute the meerkat looks without ears" 11/07/14 21:00:38 |
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Is it just me, or this the best round of captions in ages? I love this. --Michael Winner
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05/07/14 12:19:27 |
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24/03/14 20:16:35 |
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George was hoping to make the Olympus diving team 26/01/14 10:37:47 |
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05/10/12 12:08:49 |
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"Steak and Kidney £2, Mince Beef £1.50 and Cheese and Ham £1" 29/08/12 12:52:52 |
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25/04/14 12:07:08 |
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Ok. No need to Ramadan our throats 31/08/12 12:14:25 |
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28/08/12 12:44:28 |
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05/01/23 8:23:00 |
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13/09/21 8:05:29 |
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It's a clown so that's a given. --Barrie Bullock
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07/07/21 12:22:43 |
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21/08/20 12:09:41 |
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Mary had a little lamb 17/08/20 8:54:46 |
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Shocking --John Glover
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"It's sore?. Well I told you to stick to the italian, but no, you had to go and eat the Indian" 19/08/19 9:37:25 |
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"You spoil that bloody hamster" 30/03/19 8:06:50 |
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28/08/18 12:07:39 |
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Are you constipated? Is your toilet full of overgrown flowers? Then you could do with a prune. 07/02/15 20:29:27 |
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25/07/23 20:29:09 |
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That black masking tape is gonna hurt when they pull it off. 26/06/23 12:03:32 |
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You think that's big? Look at the size of the Brussel Sprouts behind her 18/02/23 12:09:40 |
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I've always thought that alien abductions would be more high-tech 11/07/22 12:07:35 |
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"Sir, do you mind running through it again?" 22/06/21 12:05:16 |
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"Do you mind running through the halls naked and screaming? Yes you do mind? Then do you mind if I do it after a question like that?" --Willie Johnson
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28/05/21 12:17:19 |
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The lower sign is for constipated bats 08/04/21 8:08:47 |
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Abandoned as a pup, Fido was raised by a family of beavers 20/01/21 8:26:26 |
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"The cat walked straight past. The disguise worked" 01/12/20 11:28:19 |
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23/03/20 20:02:36 |
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13/03/20 20:08:04 |
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"So how will I recognise you?" 24/11/19 21:01:22 |
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"Well, I told you not to pull its tail" 16/11/17 20:27:03 |
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Anon. As it’s panto season you missed ‘Ooooh’ from the start of your comment --Mr Dome
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03/10/17 20:00:51 |
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...specializing in REALLY HEAVY construction. --Greg Curtis
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27/08/17 20:08:24 |
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01/04/15 21:51:15 |
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must be me but its a bit sick! --Bad Boy Dennis.
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25/09/14 12:05:16 |
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15/05/14 20:24:32 |
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08/03/14 20:08:26 |
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The moody blue background is perfect. --Pete
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Since the rabbit incident, King Midas was banned from keeping pets 15/01/14 8:39:19 |
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The owner has earned a fortune from this bar. Now he'd rather be called Filthy Rich. 23/10/13 12:05:47 |
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Bless. Dalek babies are so cute. 25/01/13 9:19:38 |
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18/09/23 8:10:41 |
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"How much?" 13/05/23 20:02:21 |
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Poor Tina. Even the tide won't take her out. 25/02/23 12:13:19, edited: 25/02/23 12:15:52 |
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She's allready in a current relationship. --KimJong Pun
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Using a fish and cat as bait, young Dave was determined to catch himself a crocodile. 19/12/22 8:07:56 |
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"I shouldn't have got a cat and mouse tattooed on my privates" 09/10/22 12:17:40, edited: 09/10/22 12:18:15 |
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Everyone in town remembers the year that Evel Knievel was Mayor 06/09/22 12:08:31 |
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I can smell some Thing burning. 22/08/22 8:47:22 |
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"Do you like my Judge wig?" 04/08/22 20:04:48, edited: 04/08/22 20:05:35 |
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08/02/22 8:09:55 |
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In every town on a Sunday morning, you will always see pigeons, pecking away at a discarded Chinese. 19/05/21 12:06:19 |
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17/11/20 20:03:13 |
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"Just look at the state of you. Disgusting. I can't believe you got your nosed pierced" 16/09/20 20:06:11 |
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02/09/20 8:27:17 |
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Surely he wrote "covfefe"? --Molly R
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"You are offal, but I like you" 29/06/20 20:19:08 |
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29/05/20 12:16:53 |
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''So I decided during the train journey that when I grew up I would make all those f-cking Captioneers suffer, including my parents.''Extract from Anon's autobiography --Dave Bryan
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"Bloody weirdo. Did you feel him dressing us with his eyes?" 28/05/20 12:39:29 |
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That's the good thing about self isolating. I've finally got to clear out my kitchen drawers. 10/04/20 20:10:55 |
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When I clean out my drawers, I just throw them in the washing machine. --Willie Johnson
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Would have given you a LOL but I only had one supervote left.
8:43am
comment on caption:
"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" [Mark England]
This is interesting. After Molly kindly gave me 50 Supervotes I went back to this caption and tried to change my 'CREATIVE' to LOL. The result of my bungling is you now have 3 stars from me. Does this mean that in theory you could give a caption hundreds of votes by adding one supervote after another?
8:56am
comment on caption:
"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" [Mark England]
Feel free to experiment on any of my captions, Dave
8:57am
comment on caption:
"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" [Mark England]
Yeah, Dave, Supervotes can accumulate, but I think you're limited to one of each type. So you could effectively give 5 votes total: 1 Regular, 1 Creative, 1 Clever, 2 Lol.
11:16am
comment on caption:
"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" [Mark England]
Oh, I didn't know that, I'll have to keep that in mind if anyone posts a particularly impressive caption! 😀
12:57pm
comment on caption:
"Get a grip Dave, it's just a fucking Squirrel" [Mark England]
Is there a Wimpy character at MacDonalds or was that a POPEYE character, that ate all the hamburgers?
6:10pm
comment on caption:
"You prefer Wimpy? Well who's acting Wimpy now, you brat?" [Mark England]
Perhaps a nod to 8:12:54
8:18am
comment on caption:
"What's that Skippy? There's two blokes in the sky without parachutes, plummeting at a rate of knots?" [Mark England]
OK. If you want. Zzzzzz
8:34am
comment on caption:
"What's that Skippy? There's two blokes in the sky without parachutes, plummeting at a rate of knots?" [Mark England]
And here I am thinking it was just me.
10:26am
comment on caption:
"...and after spraying scent, beating their chests and howling loudly the Kangaroo mating ritual finally ends with a bout of air guitar.." [Mark England]
I wonder what scent they use.
10:52am
comment on caption:
"...and after spraying scent, beating their chests and howling loudly the Kangaroo mating ritual finally ends with a bout of air guitar.." [Mark England]