John Llamas

Charles did not even flinch as the Swallow flew into his nose.

01/12/16 8:34:50

Well you've now got more for that comment Mark.... --Mr Dome

This sort of thing just makes me cross

07/09/18 7:14:55

clever x3

Pasture bedtime

20/09/15 19:05:58

Have to agree with Mr Glover - this is a winner. --Dan Nicholls

lol x2

The locals were more accustomed to seeing stools washed up on the beach.

29/01/15 12:14:36

Ales of the Unexpected

18/09/12 7:17:42

Water Raleigh and Francis Drake

11/08/12 10:01:06

"I reared him myself."

14/10/15 19:10:32

We didn't always have hair dryers

23/09/15 11:15:06

Teaching an Ostrich to ride a motorbike was always going to prove difficult

Pisa Hut

02/02/15 8:11:39

creative x3

04/01/13 12:17:10

Auditions for Madame Butterfly were earlier than expected .........

29/08/18 7:16:55

lol x2

We asked 10 cats if they preferred Whiskas ...... here's what the other two said, for those of you who have always wondered.

14/08/14 11:12:52

"Was there anything else you wanted, besides decking on the porch?"

27/03/13 8:13:37

Well, it was at a knock down price. --Dan Dan

Squatters move in after Tennant moves on

06/03/13 12:03:16

“You said ...’write something punchy’ ...”

27/09/18 8:12:20

29/09/17 11:07:00

22/04/14 11:10:33

"Sorry officer, I didn't see the light."

22/04/14 7:43:23

"Fred.........could you turn the serving machine down a touch?"

21/11/12 20:05:21

Plaquerazzi

04/11/12 8:22:33

£100
WINNER

Against her better judgement, Vicky accepted a lift home from her blind date.

23/04/12 10:05:15

Council announce further playgrounds in the pipeline.

09/09/14 7:10:27

Some adverts just blow you away.

12/08/14 13:06:38

"You here about the Jessops gift vouchers too?"

10/01/13 20:05:29

This is believed to pre-date the Ironing Age

30/10/12 20:05:12

Top Queer

20/07/12 19:09:55

Jack loved going for a ride with his 'half brother.'

23/04/12 19:24:43

Mick�s - in � bowl

22/04/12 19:00:33

ten-tickles

19/09/11 10:04:11

Am I only the one who thinks this is no better than below average??? --Grover D. Bluebottle IV

"S**t ..... where's the baby?"

07/10/18 20:06:28

Thank you for this one. I've had to Super Vote cos I'm... ahem still tittering. --Vivvy En

Stan has an itchy bum .... sadly for him, he doesn't know his arse from his elbow.

30/11/16 21:09:12

lol x3

"Smell that ..... I'll give you a clue, it's not Scampi Fries."

21/09/16 7:03:57

The bills are piling up at the door.

21/08/15 19:41:17

Vowel movements will also not be tolerated.

29/05/15 19:33:21

No swimming if you are in-consonant. --Dan Nicholls

“I think the hoover bag might be full love.”

16/11/18 9:28:54

"I thought you said it was spitting distance ………"

07/09/18 11:14:23

"Quick, QUICK ...... Duracell anyone ..."

07/05/18 19:51:12

Pint and a small house swine

29/05/17 19:10:09

High in fibre

19/05/17 20:20:59

The Officer's Mess

15/09/16 19:08:36

Neil was seeing other girls behind her back.

03/09/16 7:04:25

"The good news is, we didn't find any drugs.
The bad news ..... you have an enlarged prostate ..."

07/06/16 20:35:02

Love it! --Greg Curtis

"OK ......... got a signal, stay there folks. Hi Mum ....... "

14/09/15 7:11:51

The tree had no chance once Ivy took hold.

Not-work Rail

01/03/15 20:26:38

10/11/14 10:39:15