Click a photo to add a caption.

captions

Mark Wilson Vote score: 5197Mark Wilson

Excellent, I give this product 5 star rating - Susan from Bristol

Q... Has your bottom got softer,looks or feels better due to the Enriched Vitamin E - Dave from London

A... What a great question Dave, I honestly think it has - Susan from Bristol

Q... Got any photo's? - Dave from London

A... *uck off you pervert - Susan from Bristol

20/03/21 9:41:32

Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

Sadly, Daisy is still trying to find a byre for her paintings.

19/02/21 12:13:20

Al Overy Vote score: 22659Al Overy

£50

Tonight on Panorama: Is there too much oestrogen in our water? We speak to three men in their thirties about their experiences.

17/02/21 8:01:22

I refuse to recognise this as the winning caption. I was getting ready to celebrate this one as the true winner - https://www.caption.me/579204Join me at the "Stop the Steal" rally followed by a march to the Caption Building alongsid... --Troompa Loompa
Endeavour 2 Persevere Vote score: 123Endeavour 2 Persevere

The Elephant in the Womb.

10/02/21 20:50:26

Al Overy Vote score: 22659Al Overy

"You spoil that moth!"

13/11/20 8:00:37

It's the least we can do... he knows what's behind your closet door... we've robbed him of his progeny. --Mauris Iocus
Fozzgog B. Vote score: 534Fozzgog B.

It was all going well until she suggested taking things upstairs

09/11/20 21:25:43

Chris Keegan Vote score: 15837Chris Keegan

Dave landed 137 fish this morning, simply by pulling the plug out.

29/10/20 12:01:38

stone face Vote score: 10117stone face

The cast of Jason And The Argonauts, wait in trepidation as the Oscar for 'The Best Skeleton In An Action Movie' is revealed.

18/10/20 11:56:41

Lol...don’t seem to be able to cast a supervote so writing lol here instead.  --Ellen Duncalf
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

Two meeters

24/09/20 20:51:37

James Lennox Vote score: 27255James Lennox

Harold always believed the son shone out of his arse.

27/08/20 7:00:40

Tony Edwards Vote score: 43021Tony Edwards

Condiments to the chef.

23/08/20 19:00:38

Al Overy Vote score: 22659Al Overy

"For goodness sake, Ted! I told you not to lie on the dog blanket with suncream on!"

14/08/20 7:00:18

Vivvy En Vote score: 17262Vivvy En

"See THAT...? THAT is how you do a French manicure."

11/08/20 11:32:31

Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

"I love the smell of my palm in the morning"

11/08/20 11:21:31

Troompa Loompa Vote score: 24667Troompa Loompa

Worker having a drink on his lunch break before he has to get back to the plant.

16/07/20 20:08:28

Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

New 'Ice Age' movie ruined by product placement say critics.

16/07/20 7:33:51

Mark England Vote score: 24350Mark England

"Come on you two. Smoke break is over. Those chimneys ain't gonna clean themselves"

08/07/20 7:25:57

Vivvy En Vote score: 17262Vivvy En

Purrverts

07/07/20 11:06:54

Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

''He didn't suffer. He fried in his sleep.''

30/06/20 19:00:38

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 25290Vanessa the Guesser

Pay As You Go

27/06/20 11:04:09

Phone Bogx --Flo .
Ian Skelding Vote score: 35532Ian Skelding

Sue didn't look right.

16/06/20 19:07:13

I think she sees a cat. --Willie Johnson
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

Dave had been isolating from his parents for 3 months. Now he is off home with all his washing...

01/06/20 11:14:32

Tony Edwards Vote score: 43021Tony Edwards

He's a member of the crash team.

19/05/20 20:01:31

Dr Divid Bomber. --Woofer 6
Tony Edwards Vote score: 43021Tony Edwards

Hospital disorderly

19/05/20 19:38:58

Mr Dome  Vote score: 20602Mr Dome

Yes honey I still have the twins

14/05/20 11:20:01

I hsdn't realised that it was a photograph of David Cameron. --Barrie Bullock
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 25290Vanessa the Guesser

I don't know about buses but 3 old men came at once.

10/05/20 11:09:22

Mark England Vote score: 24350Mark England

Air Raid Sirens

05/05/20 19:11:08

Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

"Not today love, I've got a monumental headache."

21/04/20 7:01:37

Karyn Harrison Vote score: 14106Karyn Harrison

Local fancy dress shop donates costumes to the homeless.

15/04/20 12:23:47

C CaMel Vote score: 20253C CaMel

"Guys I've got this brilliant idea, it's called The Dead Michael Palin Sketch."

14/04/20 7:51:39

At least it's being appreciated now, Anon. Always look on the bright side of life. --Dave Bryan
Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

Jest in peace

07/04/20 11:12:18

Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

"I only coughed once."

05/04/20 7:25:13

"Hey guys, 6 feet!" --Scrijjy Doo
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 3983Karen Oakenfull

Storm Ciara wreaks havoc across the UK:
"I was lucky, a trampoline missed me by an inch and the bloke over the road is wearing a shed."

13/02/20 12:29:29

James Lennox Vote score: 27255James Lennox

If dodos had been better jugglers they wouldn't be extinct.

08/02/20 12:00:17

Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

The whirled is your oyster

01/01/20 8:09:43

Stu Dent Vote score: 5769Stu Dent

In a Ford Galaxy far far away

19/12/19 12:15:54

A Big nod to 12.00.14 I did not see it when I posted --Stu Dent
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

£50

New flavour for Quality Street kept under armed guard

10/12/19 9:22:30

Congratulations Rachel. Is that a new flavor for Tubby Tustard by any chance. --Willie Johnson
Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

''I look down on him because I am a Waitrose pumpkin.''

''I look up to him because he is a Waitrose pumpkin but I look down on him because he is an Aldi pumpkin. I am a Tesco pumpkin.''

''I know my place.''

18/11/19 9:06:02

Very clever! --Karyn Harrison
stone face Vote score: 10117stone face

"How did we end up here! I told you not to take the last rite."

11/10/19 7:05:18

John  Glover Vote score: 23224John Glover

"I've just come to warn you that Abbot Twa is not a monk whose coming to bless you all."

20/08/19 11:13:45

Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

Gay pride

19/08/19 7:00:09

Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

Mythical beast world championship result:
Smaug 0 Medusa 1

02/07/19 11:00:14

Lol --sandeep chahal
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 16857Hercules Rockefeller

"I knew I shouldn't have come in here after the Hulk."

01/07/19 11:03:05

Generic RedHead Vote score: 1074Generic RedHead

"Our next song, 'Stairlift to Heaven'"

10/06/19 3:15:35

James Lennox Vote score: 27255James Lennox

All Day Breakfast

21/05/19 11:00:27

The Wolf Vote score: 21910The Wolf

I met her on match.com

18/05/19 11:00:06

She lit up my life. --James Lennox
Dot Old Vote score: 3222Dot Old

Mrs Midas

09/05/19 7:00:48

Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38816Welsh Rarebit

"I'll post this on Faithbook..."

07/05/19 11:00:04

So Jesus spoke with a lithp? --Karyn Harrison
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

Gillette, the best a ma'am can get.

04/05/19 21:07:05

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 25290Vanessa the Guesser

Some of us still love a hairy Regina.

04/05/19 19:15:39

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 25290Vanessa the Guesser

How lavish!

24/04/19 19:00:24

Stephen Bean Vote score: 54635Stephen Bean

Tom and Jerry

18/03/19 8:00:04

Mr Dome  Vote score: 20602Mr Dome

Forgive me father for I have strimmed

09/03/19 8:04:07

James Lennox Vote score: 27255James Lennox

It was a beautiful wedding, but the honeymoon in France didn't end well.

01/03/19 20:13:39

Kenny Ireland Vote score: 6396Kenny Ireland

"...and he still couldn't find my G-spot".

28/02/19 10:05:00

John Llamas Vote score: 20904John Llamas

".... see Dave, I told you this car was a "˜pussy magnet'. ..."

11/01/19 12:39:44

C CaMel Vote score: 20253C CaMel

Glastonburied

06/01/19 16:11:04

Stu Dent Vote score: 5769Stu Dent

It's not you but i really can't see this being a long term relationship

16/12/18 8:21:28

Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38816Welsh Rarebit

For Sale: British Bulldog, in mint condition.

28/11/18 8:00:14

stone face Vote score: 10117stone face

You know it's a heatwave when the diving board melts.

22/11/18 13:25:11

Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

''Don't mention the War-burtons.''

08/10/18 20:26:05

Took me a while .... but a vote worthy fun caption.  --John Glover
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 14106Karyn Harrison

Poor feller

03/10/18 7:00:30

Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

A neck in the pane.

02/10/18 11:02:17

John  Glover Vote score: 23224John Glover

🎵 A neigh in the manger ...

27/09/18 19:19:40

Tony Edwards Vote score: 43021Tony Edwards

Knitwork Rail

20/09/18 19:00:28

Crunchy Chords Vote score: 8978Crunchy Chords
  Supperhero

05/09/18 19:00:08

Vivvy En Vote score: 17262Vivvy En

One of my rasher purchases

01/09/18 7:23:17

Vivvy En Vote score: 17262Vivvy En

Clearly they have some very bright pupils

30/08/18 19:25:06

John Llamas Vote score: 20904John Llamas

Auditions for Madame Butterfly were earlier than expected .........

29/08/18 7:16:55

Ian Skelding Vote score: 35532Ian Skelding

Not the first time Julia had pants around her head.

21/07/18 7:35:09

Took me ages to get this one. Very good caption 😂 --Ethy
Dave Bryan Vote score: 41245Dave Bryan

The buck stops here

14/06/18 11:00:17

sandeep chahal Vote score: 645sandeep chahal

I'm waiting for magazine delivery

26/05/18 19:11:53

Careful, it could be Loaded. --Glad You Remember
C CaMel Vote score: 20253C CaMel

Drive-by shooting

13/05/18 19:09:48

Chris Keegan Vote score: 15837Chris Keegan

It's a studio apartment.

26/04/18 7:00:11

Mark England Vote score: 24350Mark England

Rice wine made with fox? Those Japanese will eat anything!

22/03/18 12:09:42

Crunchy Chords Vote score: 8978Crunchy Chords
Spandex Ballet

07/02/18 15:38:41

John  Glover Vote score: 23224John Glover

"You offer three camels to sleep with me, not only is that insulting, I don't even bloody smoke."

22/11/17 11:15:26

And an animal used to barter with (allegedly) in the middle east etc. Just thought i’d explain in case Anon didn’t know that  --Mr Dome
Jonathan Allsopp Vote score: 2803Jonathan Allsopp

Moira had decided to put all her marital problems on the back burner.

06/11/17 8:18:28

Leroy Brown Vote score: 8188Leroy Brown

"We're gonna need more chalk, Sarge"

24/10/17 11:21:13

Jonathan Allsopp Vote score: 2803Jonathan Allsopp

You don't see this on the continent.

15/10/17 11:44:22

It seems to be holding its own --Mr Dome
Michael Winner Vote score: 25611Michael Winner

Her thighs follow you around the room.

12/10/17 19:18:45

Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

Today's stars: Capricorn will be faced with an uphill struggle.

17/01/17 8:08:09

Please let me give you a (be) xxx --Andrea Hickling
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 24667Troompa Loompa

Jack and the beans talk.

15/01/17 21:06:30

Very good caption - enjoyed this one! --Dan Nicholls
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

That's the thing about the festive season, it does dragon a bit.

14/01/17 20:03:37

Glyn Evans Vote score: 13589Glyn Evans

"It's not you, it's me. I need space."

23/10/16 11:16:15

C CaMel Vote score: 20253C CaMel

Shortly after she started going downhill fast

17/10/16 12:50:48

What a refreshing moment....A captioneer That votes as well as submitting captions, is topping the top ten xxx You get my vote for fair play xxxx  --Andrea Hickling
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

Braking news

11/10/16 19:16:20

Chris Halliwell Vote score: 6238Chris Halliwell

PepperOnly Pizza.

31/07/16 8:27:17

Darthey Bussell Vote score: 24667Darthey Bussell

Roger Bannister

25/07/16 11:05:38

best ive read on here for a while! --tony kelly
Michael Winner Vote score: 25611Michael Winner

£100

“Did you remember to pack the helium balloons for the party?”

12/06/16 11:00:44

Haha, thanks everyone, my first win, woowoo! --Michael Winner
Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

Hide Park, London

22/04/16 7:13:54

Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

He taught me grammar. There should be a question mark at the end of this sentence. After all, the devil is in the detail.

19/02/16 8:00:07

Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38816Welsh Rarebit

Caught by using the right hook.

06/02/16 20:00:10

...and a good punchline. --Leroy Brown
Chris Halliwell Vote score: 6238Chris Halliwell

Camp fire.

21/01/16 13:41:13

Thanks.  --Chris Halliwell
Leroy Brown Vote score: 8188Leroy Brown

Track suit

20/01/16 13:39:34

Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

" Tickets please "

02/01/16 12:01:40

Great caption :-) Featured on the Caption.Me Facebook page, Twitter feed and  --Chris Beach
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3481Stephen Paterson

No Strings Attached!

09/11/15 12:02:16

Dan Nicholls Vote score: 20755Dan Nicholls

Meanwhile, Ironman is inside getting rid of creases in the curtains.

25/09/15 7:39:03

Should've taken them to Ron Maidens --Mr Dome
Cath Jones Vote score: 38816Cath Jones

Hindsight is not always a wonderful thing.

19/09/15 11:03:09

repeat repeat repeut --cunt cunt
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3481Stephen Paterson

Meanwhile in Aberdeen, someone had just popped their head in the door to announce that a cash machine was giving out double the notes.

11/09/15 16:24:00

more captions