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For when you need to answer the call of nature.
For when you need to answer the call of nature. photo | portfolio
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Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19215Troompa Loompa

£50
WINNER

For when you need to answer the call of nature.

27/06/20 11:00:12

 17
Many thanks everyone for your kind words and apologies to Rachel P and the others I sneaked ahead of at the last minute. 😊 --Troompa Loompa
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13964Vanessa the Guesser

Pay As You Go

27/06/20 11:04:09

 1
Phone Bogx --Flo .
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13964Vanessa the Guesser

"Sorry, I'm straining to hear you"

27/06/20 11:05:59

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13964Vanessa the Guesser

"At the turd stroke, it will be 12.27 and 30 seconds.."

27/06/20 11:27:30

 2
Must be an Irish Speaking Clock....12.27 and 30 seconds..So It Is. --Flo .
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19215Troompa Loompa

"I need to make a throne call."

27/06/20 11:00:21

 1
For those with verbal Diarrhea. --Flo .
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

“Give me a tinkle”

27/06/20 11:19:20

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5346Karyn Harrison

Flat for sale, Bethnal Green - £500,000. All mod cons. No chain.

27/06/20 15:48:28

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21239John Glover

"You've got problems with your ring? Do you need a doctor or a telephone engineer?"

27/06/20 11:58:32

 1
With my missus a locksmith. --Flo .
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5806Paul Reeve

British Smellycom

27/06/20 11:46:30

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10896Mr Dome

Please hold

27/06/20 13:43:45

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 945alexandra ball

New rules for call centre workers after lockdown

27/06/20 12:32:37

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5806Paul Reeve

“I would give it a minute mate, if I was you.”

27/06/20 12:48:17

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15564Dan Nicholls

...and that's how I came up with the idea for my company Dial-A-Bogroll

27/06/20 12:18:12

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

The Turdis

27/06/20 11:42:10

 1
Seen in Doctor Loo :^) --Crunchy Chords
Molly R Vote score: 2376Molly R

For people who are used to peeing in telephone kiosks.

27/06/20 11:00:08

 1
Oh that's spoiled the fun of it. --Flo .
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13964Vanessa the Guesser

"I'd better stand back a bit. I'm using my Dictaphone."

27/06/20 14:50:06

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7032Vivvy En

Ever since the red telephone box ceased to be, public phones have gone down the pan

27/06/20 13:28:26

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2277Mark Wilson

Elvis has left the building

27/06/20 12:26:40

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15564Dan Nicholls

I just called to say, I lav you.

27/06/20 12:18:50

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5214Kenny Ireland

George Michael's pick up place.

27/06/20 11:15:56

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33194Tony Edwards

Phones 4loo

27/06/20 11:01:06

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14017Stephen Bean

Boris Johnson reveals the UK's 'world beating' Covid-19 isolation booths.

27/06/20 11:00:24

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33194Tony Edwards

Pubic telephone

27/06/20 11:12:07

 
  Smuldo Vote score: 11739 Smuldo

"I think I just Butt Dialled You..."

27/06/20 16:22:23

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5346Karyn Harrison

Jane was sacked for talking on the job.

27/06/20 11:44:04

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33194Tony Edwards

Designed for a telephone user's convenience.

27/06/20 11:34:44

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 6384Greg Curtis

Can You Hear Me

27/06/20 11:24:44

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7495Hercules Rockefeller

"How dare you prank call me with that potty mouth of yours!"

27/06/20 11:10:35

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12691Dave Bryan

''I've forgotten the STD.''

''Don't worry, you can't catch them off toilet seats.''

27/06/20 11:04:19

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3088Al Overy

Norman modified his cubicle to mitigate his terrible fear of cold calling.

28/06/20 11:48:11

 1
If he's scared sh!tless, he's in the right place. --Willie Johnson
Al Overy Vote score: 3088Al Overy

Loo's change only.

28/06/20 11:45:15

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2160Willie Johnson

You can drop a dime while you drop a deuce.

28/06/20 10:38:14

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 409Gavin Smithers

Public toilets in Liverpool reopened today.

27/06/20 23:15:11

 
Tony Busby Vote score: 2069Tony Busby

"It just doesn't ring true John. From where I'm sitting it stinks."

27/06/20 18:56:56

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10196Chris Keegan

Phone Pee-osk.

27/06/20 18:08:21

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7350Glyn Evans

Nothing unusual here.

27/06/20 11:48:26

 2
True....Shit Happens. --Flo .
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19215Troompa Loompa

Dave had always wanted an orifice job as a cisterns analyst.

27/06/20 11:14:36

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2160Willie Johnson

The toilet doesn't have a seat. Or a lid. Or a tank. Or a handle. But the phone works. It'll call up the 1980's for you.

28/06/20 10:37:38

 
Dev B Vote score: 645Dev B

Colin Farrell's dream Phone Booth

28/06/20 9:55:44

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 409Gavin Smithers

Diarrhoea? Vomiting? GET A TEST!

27/06/20 23:49:16

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 409Gavin Smithers

Matt Hancock opens the new bowel cancer early detection
initiative.

27/06/20 23:27:51

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11390Neil Mackenzie

Because of the sickly yellow paint job, they had to put in a receptacle.

27/06/20 22:47:35

 
Joe Vote score: 1624Joe

Throne box

27/06/20 20:53:08

 
  Smuldo Vote score: 11739 Smuldo

CRank Caller

27/06/20 16:25:02

 
  Smuldo Vote score: 11739 Smuldo

"I need to stop phoning these Shatlines... "

27/06/20 16:24:01

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5966Tosser Wivlov

This phone is broken, I made a 45 minute call and didn't have to spend a penny.

27/06/20 15:45:13

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 1007Sam Cass

I'm calling Bull Shit!

27/06/20 15:05:44

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3065Scrijjy Doo

I'm on hold.

27/06/20 14:38:58

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7032Vivvy En

-"Must be a French telephone"
-"Wee"

27/06/20 14:38:38

 
Stephen Graham Vote score: 1092Stephen Graham

"I'd like to place a trunk call...."

27/06/20 14:37:52

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3065Scrijjy Doo

"Yes. I'd like to place a toilet-to-person call."

27/06/20 14:35:09

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3065Scrijjy Doo

"Yes. I'd like to speak to the supervisor."

27/06/20 14:21:50

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10896Mr Dome

My landline is rubbish but this is crapper

27/06/20 13:52:29

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2277Mark Wilson

Dave was determined... all that "your call is important, stay on the line" was ending today

27/06/20 13:01:50

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 23676Ian Skelding

Cubicall

27/06/20 12:11:45

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3065Scrijjy Doo

Dr. Loo

27/06/20 12:04:58

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13964Vanessa the Guesser

This toilet cubicle is always engaged.

27/06/20 11:33:17

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12691Dave Bryan

''I'm not using that. It's got no seat.''

''Don't get so hung up about it.''

27/06/20 11:28:18

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12691Dave Bryan

No Cards Cack Only

27/06/20 11:16:02

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33194Tony Edwards

For those who need to talk to Huey on the big white telephone.

27/06/20 11:14:43

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14017Stephen Bean

Barnard Castle town council adapt public telephones after Dominic Cummings mistakes one for a urinal.

27/06/20 11:13:27

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5214Kenny Ireland

Cell phone.

27/06/20 11:11:51

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12691Dave Bryan

''That little black monkey has caused a lot of damage.''

27/06/20 11:08:51

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4973Stu Dent

After one bout of diarrhea i went through the entire phonebook in vain.

27/06/20 11:01:36

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19215Troompa Loompa

Dave was arrested for making a knobscene phone call.

27/06/20 11:00:30

 1
This Dave wants catching he gets everywhere this might flush him out. --Flo .
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19215Troompa Loompa

Public Phone Bogs

27/06/20 11:00:05

 
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