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	lol "Our next song, 'Stairlift to Heaven'" 10/06/19 3:15:35	20

	Unfortunately Churchill was dropped by Pepsi after testing positive for Coke. 28/06/22 22:26:11	1 18
The eyes have it! --John Glover
	"Your March driver is Mo, he enjoys talking about the weather, moaning about the news and overcharging you." 27/04/20 23:22:57	17

	creative Wow, trick or treat has changed since I was a kid. 26/09/18 0:07:47	16

	...Kind Regards. The EU. 21/03/20 4:32:54	15

	lol The Toilet Zone 06/05/20 21:22:32	1 13
Doesn't matter what planet you're on, you're either on a roll or taking shit from some arsehole --Woofer 6
	Apple grumble 24/01/19 20:05:03	13

	Bay of Bengal 01/10/22 1:34:43	12

	Giant flip-flops? I don't like the sound of those. 01/07/22 19:02:40	12

	I'm not saying self-isolation is lowering my standards or anything, but i definitely would. 24/03/20 15:20:43	1 12
Definitely put on a mask. --Scrijjy Doo
	lol "My wife was right, yours is bigger than mine." 21/08/19 18:11:25	12

	Hey! Watch where you're firing those ping pong balls. 01/03/19 21:08:19	11

	They'll always remember their first smog. 29/11/22 2:03:57	10

	lol "Take me home Dave. They can find someone else to ride that skateboard" 26/11/19 9:45:44	10

	100m pub crawl. 17/11/19 8:28:53	10

	You think that's impressive? You should see his buns. 09/04/19 0:32:57	10

	"Beware, the sauce is strong with this one" 26/01/19 15:07:44	10

	The High Sheriff 18/10/18 16:39:36	10

	Grazed and confused. 21/11/19 8:18:40	9

	Mile High Grub 26/11/22 11:30:12	8

	"Aww, she's got her grandad's hair" "Yeah I better give it back before he realises it's missing" 22/11/22 6:38:45, edited: 22/11/22 6:41:13	8

	McDonald's Inc 18/12/21 21:27:33	1 8
It was cosponsored by a tattoo removal service, but their ad was removed without a trace. --Willie Johnson
	I've heard he has a 'Very good boy' rating on Uber. 08/08/20 15:51:56	1 8
Uber dangerous. --Willie Johnson
	"If they ask, say you were driving and the cat came out of nowhere." 24/03/20 9:20:45	1 8
Quick, swallow these reds! --Scrijjy Doo
	Man arrested for domestic abuse after hitting the bottle. 30/10/19 10:12:03	8

	"we've run out of toilet paper, darn it!." 15/09/19 21:57:19	8

	"What the hell is Goldilocks doing in our bed?" 13/07/19 13:43:47	8

	Stiff drink 06/04/19 22:46:04	8

	A square earth? That's ridiculous. Everyone knows it's flat. 23/02/19 13:24:17	8

	Sole Food 31/12/18 21:29:17	8

	Is there a window open in here? I can feel a giraffe. 02/10/18 12:36:13	8

	Warburnton's 23/01/23 3:40:51	7

	clever "Ruff day?" 09/12/22 10:37:08	7

	Just Stop Oil protesters have now resorted to using Tipp-Ex. 26/10/22 11:57:30	7

	Sean D. Lear 06/06/22 19:28:00	7

	WARNING: HEAVY LOAD 01/12/21 5:33:06	7

	Â¡sÉÉ¯Ê‡sÄ±É¹É¥É” ÊŽÉ¹É¹ÇÉ¯ 27/04/20 16:16:17	7

	Behind that smile, Gary is desperately missing the football. 25/03/20 17:55:18	7

	"Congratulations on your purchase of your new wife, instructions are included." 22/03/20 8:23:35	2 7
"Warning: Choking Hazard" or maybe: Warning: Joking Hazard. --Willie Johnson
	"That's disgusting,what kind of sick freak wants to read books?" 05/02/20 21:05:02	7

	Visible panty line. 13/10/19 4:01:38	7

	"Mummy, can i have one of those Vladimir Putin toys?" 08/10/19 23:42:38	7

	Well, this sign is a pain in the neck isn't it? 02/09/19 13:46:32	7

	Nan down. 19/08/19 23:22:53	7

	"When do we tell him that he's adopted?" 11/09/18 21:52:01	7

	As featured in 'Where?' magazine. 06/12/22 2:52:22	6

	He's part of the WC Universe. 01/12/22 8:00:19	6

	Aquastrian 22/11/22 8:36:47	6

	"We only accept PrayPal" 18/06/22 17:34:15	6

	"It's not perfect, one of them has a chip on his shoulder" "Don't worry that'll be fixed in January." 18/11/20 17:18:41	6

	Unfortunately they were too late, Yoga had been executed 2 hours earlier. 16/05/20 16:43:11	6

	Adjust Do It. 26/10/19 10:50:04	6

	I'm going to put this in a butty. 15/09/19 17:59:56	6

	"i swear to you, i really am a Nigerian prince with 67 million pounds to give away." 10/09/19 14:43:41	6

	"Put down the salad madam and come with me in an elderly fashion." 02/10/18 12:39:15	1 6
love this - I can picture the police officer saying it lol --Funny Bean
	Man's best Freud. 22/09/18 20:39:34	6

	Inspirational post. 27/10/22 12:36:41	1 5

	Where's the plaque to go with it? 14/09/22 15:32:27	5

	"Screw?" "Not now, we've got to finish this first" 13/07/22 17:32:23	5

	Yuri Ga-ga-rin 06/01/22 18:15:57	5

	I'm never trusting Tinder again. 22/12/21 20:23:35	1 5
It's a Tinder surprise. You pop it in your mouth and steel bolts spring out of both cheeks. --Willie Johnson
	"What an Eiffel!" 25/08/20 19:54:10	5

	Personally i don't see the lure. 13/05/20 13:43:29	1 5
Only failure. --Woofer 6
	CSI:Lilliput 28/04/20 23:01:41	5

	"I bet John, Paul, George and Ringo never had this f*****g problem." 03/03/20 10:00:33	5

	Gator aid. 29/02/20 15:00:31	5

	Madonna's looking well. 17/12/19 12:15:12	5

	He arrived in his U-Oeuf-O. 24/11/19 16:24:26	5

	Crow: "Then the woman at the airport said to me 'any carry on?', then i said no thank you I've just eaten. Get it? Carry on sounds like carrion" Cat: "This is why i cant take you to parties" 02/09/19 13:51:51	5

	Quick, step on it, they're on our trail. 22/07/19 8:17:18	5

	The type of family that always gets labeled. 01/07/19 17:11:09	5

	Look at what I've just pulled. 29/11/22 16:47:29	4

	Paw De France 24/11/22 20:05:15	4

	SpudUWrite 27/10/22 8:16:12	4

	Hopefully she doesn't write him a John Deere letter. 10/09/22 16:36:57	4

	MISSING CAT: Responds to the name Lady. Any information please contact Mr De Burgh on number below. 02/07/22 13:57:17	4

	The Mmmm25 24/06/22 16:42:59	4

	Massive book sale. 18/06/22 18:08:15	4

	Yes he's adopted, nobody wanted him because of way he looks. I guess nobody wants a ginger kid. 20/12/21 22:01:07	4

	"I'm looking for a supplier for a big meal coming up, can you do it?" 02/12/21 9:20:55	4

	The year 2041 and pubs are finally open. 24/01/21 17:37:57	4

	This was the high point of his day. 21/05/20 15:22:52	4

	Sundae Girl 27/01/20 19:06:29	4

	"Where is the pastor anyway?" "God knows" 08/11/19 0:05:46	4

	If she spins any quicker we'll be able to see her snickers. 04/11/19 0:06:37	4

	"I'll be right back, just going for a knit." 15/09/19 19:35:07	4

	Day 27: I'm starting the think the cows have figured i'm not one of them. 20/08/19 23:31:00	4

	Madame Tussauds unveiled their new Jeremy Clarkson waxwork today. 07/08/19 14:33:03	4

	Hovis where the heart is. 30/07/19 16:00:33	4

	"Alexa, show me a large plaice to stay in." 24/06/19 0:48:58	4

	Toy Gory 3 09/06/19 3:27:10	4

	"Loosen your grip Smurfette! He's turning blue!" 04/06/19 2:54:22	4

	Optician: "Better with, or without?" Patient: "Definitely without" 28/02/19 15:35:05	4

	Light headed 22/01/19 0:06:46	4

	Road Tr.i.p 11/10/18 19:25:27	4

	The result of Madame Tussauds budget cuts. 29/09/18 1:47:52	4

	"The official juice of Jehovah's witnesses" 25/08/18 21:53:58	4

	Mat with one tea. 06/01/23 4:40:01	3

	Glimpse of new artwork installed at Tory HQ. 02/12/22 10:29:58	3

	Just don't ask where the candle is. 22/11/22 22:02:37	3

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