Glyn Evans

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captions

	"Mittens, what is your specialist subject?" 10/01/23 12:16:26	22

	creative "The milky bras are on me." 05/07/13 12:05:39	22

	Tub zero temperarures 29/12/22 12:26:34	21

	clever x2 "I don't know how I got burnt, I've had my sun screen on all day." 11/11/16 20:08:44	1 21
hahaha, took me some time.'sun screen' --sandeep chahal
	clever "It's not you, it's me. I need space." 23/10/16 12:16:15	20

	lol creative Hey Kids! If you enjoy Milky, there's also Meaty The Amazing Abattoir Cow which comes with detachable parts and a bolt gun 16/07/21 8:06:13	19

	lol For some drivers, this makes no fucking difference. 31/01/14 8:13:20	19

	Heir Guitar 22/03/23 12:00:29	18

	lol "We have reason to believe Sir, that you were driving and have swapped seats with Trixie to avoid taking a breathalyser test" 14/10/22 12:00:22	17

	lol x2 Crutches won't stop Eric from doing the long jump. 02/04/16 13:10:04	16

	Mary Poppins was always one for good conduct. 07/04/23 20:08:58, edited: 07/04/23 20:14:47	15

	"We're returning these with our sincerest apologies they were somewhat damaged in the police ambush but on a lighter note we can tell you he died with his boots on" 15/03/23 12:04:57	15

	"Gotta love a bit of improvised curling" 19/10/21 8:02:42	15

	Fuck off, it's only September 22/09/21 20:02:31	2 15
How I feel walking round my local Sainsbury's. They had Christmas stuff in for several weeks. Takes all the joy out of it. --Lucky Elperro
	"It's alright Mum, you push, I'll catch my sister" 18/02/21 8:25:23	15

	lol x2 creative "This silver hand came out the sky, pointed me out and said "It's you". I thought I'd won the lottery but all it did was f**k up my brolly." 07/10/16 8:24:31	1 15
You beat me to this caption by like 10 seconds :) Nice one. Very creative! --Greg Curtis
	lol "E.T. no go home" 29/06/22 12:00:08	14

	"What have you never seen a Piranha in drag before? I'm off to the Rio Carnival" 21/08/21 8:20:27	14

	Love comes naturally, don't faucet. 21/03/13 12:05:27	13

	Starducks 22/08/23 20:00:26	13

	"Do not laugh fair maiden, giant tiddly winks is a very serious sport" 10/08/23 8:04:20	12

	creative x2 "Which horseman of the Apocalypse do you belong to?" "Global Warming" 22/11/22 9:27:23	12

	Lol. They come with shopping bags so they're obviously carrier pigeons. 07/10/22 12:00:21	12

	Mona only modelled part time, her main passion was taxidermy. 20/09/22 8:03:06	1 12

	lol "You see that?" "Yeah" "It's the corner of the picture." 02/05/20 12:01:16	12

	"That's the last time I go down on someone who's vajazzled" 10/07/23 12:06:32	11

	"Scalpel beats double telephone" 29/05/23 20:03:03	11

	"Alexa, wipe my arse" 24/05/22 12:19:16	11

	"Those flippin' shape blocks won't fit, I know what'll sort them out!" 10/04/22 8:07:30	11

	creative The Wisdom of Heinzsite. 07/07/14 9:36:00	11

	"Yes, in hindsight top hats don't make the best wheels" 04/05/23 20:05:57	10

	Joy's on her monthly cycle 03/03/23 12:45:51	1 10

	It must be brush hour 08/02/23 12:05:09	10

	"Wow that's some power on next door's leaf blower" 09/11/22 20:00:12	10

	Moggerheads 01/08/22 20:00:12	10

	"I'd get my bike but if I do that giant hairy caterpillar might eat me" 02/01/23 13:06:19	9

	lol "That's amazing. I can see Jesus's face in one of Gulliver's sperms!" 06/05/22 15:42:09	1 9
I wonder how much she'd get for him on eBay. --Karyn Harrison
	lol "I take strong offence that this place infantalises men!" "Shush Dean, otherwise they won't give you a carton of Um Bongo" 19/09/23 12:32:37	1 8
love it --The Wolf
	"Must be more of an autumn spaniel than a springer" 01/08/23 12:51:37	8

	"Nobody ever realises that the PG in PG Tips stands for Pinot Grigio" 17/07/23 12:03:01	1 8

	A shock to the cistern 16/05/23 12:12:19, edited: 16/05/23 12:26:55	8

	"You'll regret this Superman!" "No, I won't. I didn't want one before and I don't want a *ucking vacuum cleaner now" 04/02/23 7:27:50	1 8

	"What do you expect? It's Subway" 03/02/23 12:17:39	8

	The Cat that got the Cream, the Tuna, The Full Roast Chicken, The Liver... 04/08/22 12:10:42	8

	Place of Warship 19/04/22 14:14:59	8

	I wanted an authentic cinema experience whilst watching Top Gun, it's why I put in an ejector seat 25/08/23 12:28:07	7

	"Gina's wearing frog's legs. The other models have got on kangaroo legs, flea legs, rabbit's feet..." "It's the Spring collection, silly" 01/06/23 12:02:28, edited: 01/06/23 12:03:24	1 7

	"What's that?" "Summit" 07/01/23 20:10:33	7

	Most won't survive Many will fail Not everyone can endure the sheer severity and intensity that is the ancient art of origami swan table napkin making 03/01/23 12:10:26	1 7
You had me at just swan table napkin making 😉 --Julia Kinsey
	"We should probably help that swimmer being attacked by that alligator rather than filming the whole thing to post online later" 24/09/22 12:00:17	7

	lol "Oi, dickhead! Get off my tightrope! I'm walking here!" 24/03/22 12:16:30	7

	"Remember the advice from Ghostbusters, make sure the streams don't cross" 18/09/23 12:01:22	6

	Marie Pan-Amtoinette 22/07/23 8:10:59	6

	Dog Corleone 09/07/23 12:11:54	6

	"Grandad, when you said you were going to mop the floor with me, I didn't think you were being serious" 10/06/23 9:36:43	6

	Charlesboro 19/05/23 15:52:21	6

	"Seats you Sir!" 13/05/23 9:09:58	6

	It's important in life to aim high 18/03/23 20:38:57	6

	The Ice Squad 12/03/23 20:15:27	6

	Snap shot 05/03/23 9:39:54	6

	"We went out for a lovely day of motorboating" 04/03/23 9:31:00	6

	"Yeah, biting off the bottom like I do with an ice cream cone doesn't quite work in the same way" 31/01/23 9:17:44	6

	"I wish to complain about this toad I bought half an hour ago from this very boutique, it's croaked" 29/12/22 20:02:03	2 6
"No no he's not croaked, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable toad, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful flumage." --Crunchy Chords
	Dog Pray Afternoon 29/12/22 9:54:24	6

	"This is a no smoking area? Of course it was a no smoking area, before I got here" 29/11/22 20:00:19, edited: 29/11/22 20:00:32	6

	Trippin' 18/09/22 8:39:20	6

	The tortoise won because the hare was too busy shooting up and having a wank. 02/09/22 8:13:14	1 6

	creative "That's nothing. I've seen stranger things..." 10/08/22 20:02:51	6

	"Egg tu, brute?" 06/08/22 12:10:58	6

	How I got my bald patch 31/07/22 12:02:16	6

	"Ha ha! Missed me four times. You're a terrible shot. Is that the best you can do?" 12/03/21 8:14:34	2 6
Shooting Gullery --Troompa Loompa
	"You're a cheat..." the Hare accused the cyclist, stealing his helmet and holding it up high, "...you're no fucking tortoise." 18/07/15 12:16:16	1 6
The real reason the tortoise won. --Michael Monkhouse
	"It has been several weeks since my last confession..." "Yeah I know and I told you to fuck off last time as well" 19/08/23 0:23:05	5

	"How are you so shocked? This wasn't the same reaction I got from The Laughing Cavalier" 12/08/23 14:00:43	1 5

	"Missed opportunity there, you should have used tortillas and become wrapunsel" 29/06/23 12:01:20	5

	"Bro, take all the time you need in the world but most barbers I know use scissors" 29/05/23 20:07:51	5

	"Does my bunting look big in this?" 22/05/23 20:09:08	5

	"Guys, the hole isn't big enough. When you release the catapult I'm gonna splat on the cave's ceiling" 13/02/23 20:09:30	5

	"Hey! I ordered a peanut colada but whatever this was, it was delicious" 11/01/23 12:05:18	5

	"The AIs have it" 14/12/22 12:18:26	5

	"Wayne, I'm not entirely sure about combining your skills in taxidermy with the light fittings" 03/12/22 8:11:33	5

	"Start up the motor Mum, we're all ready to water ski" 19/11/22 20:55:06	5

	Gina's still doesn't know where she got the nickname "Builder's Bum". 04/11/22 9:09:23	5

	creative The conservative Smith family live in the suburbs. ChopChop a travelling homicidal clown comes to town. Little do the family know about Germaine's days visiting circuses indulging in her clown fetish and that is why ChopChop is here. He's come to reclaim the kids he never knew he had. Time has been lost and John was considered the more suitable parent, but ChopChop wants his kids even if he has to hack them to pieces. The Smiths' lives will change forever as ChopChop teaches the Smiths the true meaning of being a "home wrecker". "Illegitimate" in cinemas this Halloween. 06/10/22 8:16:43, edited: 06/10/22 8:19:19	3 5
True. However, after you've been on caption.me for a while you begin to get tired of the same old puns/jokes. It's good that captioneers are inventive and try mini stories, poems etc. It helps to prevent the site from becoming stale and repetitive. --Dave Bryan
	clever The best defence against youtuberculosis 25/09/22 20:00:11	5

	"There's a bomb on the bus, don't go under 50 mph" "You've picked the wrong bus mate, this bus can't get over 50" 15/09/22 20:52:03	5

	The Fantastically Furnished Mr Fox 13/09/22 8:06:58	5

	"As I suspected, we're in a cult alright" "What makes you say that?" "Giving all of our money over to Leonard, the fact that he's not here, the chlorine gas..." 16/07/22 20:12:48	5

	When you clear out the kitchen cupboards, there's always something you find that you forgot about... 01/07/22 12:05:56	5

	Bermuda Triangle Mystery Finally Solved Nobody expects a huge fecking lamp post in the middle of the Ocean. 03/05/22 20:08:19	5

	"We're sorry about Hansel and Gretel burning you up in the oven, but o wise one please tell us where is it you keep the tin opener?" 31/03/22 12:02:17	5

	"Your fifteen minutes is up, now fuck off you pervert" 26/08/23 12:01:02	1 4

	"Rebuilding was fairly easy, we built around where the tornado dropped them all" 17/08/23 12:06:15	4

	"Darling, the babysitter's here!" 12/07/23 9:02:58	4

	"Let's roll" "Dangerous words to say to an alligator next to the sea" 27/06/23 20:07:42	1 4

	"Oh dear no! Something's gone a rye!" 21/06/23 16:12:41	4

	"I don't think assassins are going to fall for the princess's body double, boss" 20/06/23 8:40:15	4

	"This town used to be a hamlet" "I could never tell" 11/06/23 9:30:12	3 4
alas... --Peter Houle
	"Cutest suicide bomber ever!" 27/05/23 12:06:44	4

	"It's so annoying that I can't throw stones" 07/05/23 20:12:52	1 4
Voters might want to also consider 20:05:41 --James Lennox

more captions

last comments (total: 71)

A nod to 8:20

[anon]

04/08/23
9:35am

comment on caption:
Staffolding [Glyn Evans]

This one is over my head LOL. What is Bear Grills?

Kathleen Ralph

06/08/23
4:32pm

comment on caption:
"Bear Grills?"

"Are you taking the piss?" [Glyn Evans]

Bear Grylls is a British adventurer, writer, and television presenter. He's widely known for his television series Man vs. Wild.

KT A

06/08/23
5:14pm

comment on caption:
"Bear Grills?"

"Are you taking the piss?" [Glyn Evans]

It's ok Kathleen. You can post your response here if you like, or on some other random caption if you prefer 😁😁

Mr Dome

06/08/23
6:16pm

comment on caption:
"Bear Grills?"

"Are you taking the piss?" [Glyn Evans]

''And the Mona Lisa was quietly taken with them as well.''

[anon]

13/08/23
8:39am

comment on caption:
"How are you so shocked? This wasn't the same reaction I got from The Laughing Cavalier" [Glyn Evans]

What? She loves the feel of a bearded man's face rubbing along her naked extended pregnant belly. Don't be hard on her, it's not as if she's done this many times before...even though this is her seventh child 🤔

Glyn Evans

27/08/23
4:43pm

comment on caption:
"Your fifteen minutes is up, now fuck off you pervert" [Glyn Evans]

That's also what I reckon is happening here.

Peter Houle

02/09/23
8:52pm

comment on caption:
"The glory hole was meant to bring people together as a sectarian sucking off station, but instead the die hard Protestants and Catholics are using it as a piss barrier" [Glyn Evans]

1 0

A wall is a terrible idea for a piss barrier. Digging a trench and filling it with sectarian piss so it becomes a piss moat is the way to go.

There'd be an army of contributors if they wanted to mark their territory in such a way and the piss in the moat would also be an extension of themselves.

Glyn Evans

03/09/23
9:10am

It's an untold part of the story that was edited out years ago.

Being only a minor character who scadaddles before the main action takes place, Black Quiff was written out.

I guess you're only worth talking about if you get caught 🙄

Glyn Evans

11/09/23
4:20pm