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Tina, thats the 25th photo youve had taken with him this week.
''Tina, that's the 25th photo you've had taken with him this week.''
Dave Bryan
"No comment"
"No comment"
Vivvy En
"Its an honour to shake your hand, Your Holiness and... Oh, sticky! Youre a web slinger too?" "No. Ive just been beating the Bishop."
"It's an honour to shake your hand, Your Holiness and... Oh, sticky! You're a web slinger too?"

"No. I've just been beating the Bishop."
Al Overy
Now weve lost the lead.
Now we've lost the lead.
Tosser Wivlov
If youre new to caption.me, you need to know that cats are very big round here.
If you're new to caption.me, you need to know that cats are very big round here.
Al Overy
I bet its not the first purple head shes pulled off
I bet it's not the first purple head she's pulled off
Mr Dome
"OK, I agree, people shouldnt pollute the sea with rubbish and plastic but you have to admit... this polystyrene has come in handy"
"OK, I agree, people shouldn't pollute the sea with rubbish and plastic but you have to admit... this polystyrene has come in handy"
Mark England
Is your daughter training for the Olympics? At the moment, yes, but she could switch to the Paralympics.
''Is your daughter training for the Olympics?''

''At the moment, yes, but she could switch to the Paralympics.''
Dave Bryan
"Mummy youre really lucky youre blind."
"Mummy you're really lucky you're blind."
Stephen Bean
Were gonna have to take the foie gras off the menu.
We're gonna have to take the foie gras off the menu.
Tosser Wivlov
Young Afghan arriving on a beach at Dover wonders if the dinghy is still there.
Young Afghan arriving on a beach at Dover wonders if the dinghy is still there.
Lucky Elperro
"Whats for tea?" "Salad"
"What's for tea?"

"Salad"
Vanessa the Guesser
"Ok Google. A man runs you over and straps you into the passenger seat of his car thinking youre roadkill. Hes now masturbating whilst ordering a Big Mac meal at the drive thru. What are my options?"
"Ok Google. A man runs you over and straps you into the passenger seat of his car thinking you're roadkill. He's now masturbating whilst ordering a Big Mac meal at the drive thru. What are my options?"
The Wolf
"When I die, dont waste your money on expensive funerals". "Okay"
"When I die, don't waste your money on expensive funerals".

"Okay"
Lucky Elperro
"I thought wed agreed we werent doing f**king presents this year!"
"I thought we'd agreed we weren't doing f**king presents this year!"
Vivvy En
"How many times Have I told you not to take the short cut past the magnet factory"
"How many times Have I told you not to take the short cut past the magnet factory"
Lucky Elperro
"Eating at McDonalds every day for the last ten years hasnt done us any harm", say teenagers Jason and Carol.
"Eating at McDonalds every day for the last ten years hasn't done us any harm", say teenagers Jason and Carol.
Stephen Bean
"This is an important Government announcement: There are plenty of shellfish and no need to panic. Do not rush to the beach..."
"This is an important Government announcement: There are plenty of shellfish and no need to panic. Do not rush to the beach..."
Al Overy
"Ill just marry him." thought young Melania.
"I'll just marry him." thought young Melania.

Dot Old
"I know dressing up as a giant mouse seems ridiculous but trust me, its your best chance of not being attacked by a Gruffalo."
"I know dressing up as a giant mouse seems ridiculous but trust me, it's your best chance of not being attacked by a Gruffalo."
Stephen Bean
"Jane, weve been together a long time and, I hope Im not asking too much but I know you love me, so... PLEASE MAY I SIPHON SOME OF YOUR PETROL?"
"Jane, we've been together a long time and, I hope I'm not asking too much but I know you love me, so... PLEASE MAY I SIPHON SOME OF YOUR PETROL?"
Al Overy
The annual general meeting of the Lemming Appreciation Society.
The annual general meeting of the Lemming Appreciation Society.
Dave Bryan
My Lethal Pony
My Lethal Pony
Karyn Harrison
Were very sad hes died. Good dogs are thin on the ground.
''We're very sad he's died. Good dogs are thin on the ground.''
Dave Bryan
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