Click a photo to add a caption.
captions
 Chris Keegan |
£50  13/03/19 12:20:20 |
39 |
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So that's why she had a sore throat..
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Mr. Toad |
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It was usually easier to take the A4. 09/06/12 11:28:38 |
3 |
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Perfect.
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 Ian Skelding |
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"Look, there's some nosy bastard looking through our letterbox." 15/03/13 21:00:00 |
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Well done for thinking out of the (letter) box.
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 Spycenwolf |
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04/05/19 12:01:16 |
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Thank you for your kind words, Crunchy Chords! I was chuffed to bits when my caption garnered so much love. I am truly grateful to all of you guys and girls for this. I think that Welsh Rarebit's caption deservedly won. Apart from bei...
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Vanessa the Guesser |
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£50 He's in for a shock. There's a conductor on board today. 27/04/19 12:09:49 |
19 |
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I feel lucky to have won as I was up against some brilliant high scoring captions this month. Thank you for the votes, supervotes and kind comments!
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C CaMel |
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Horoscope:'Taurus will enter Uranus.' 22/07/18 8:45:58 |
1 |
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Do you mean Horrorscope?
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Welsh Rarebit |
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03/03/16 20:15:26 |
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Dan Nicholls |
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08/10/18 8:08:02 |
4 |
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Noah: "Sorry guys, I've zebras and lions on board, I'll improvise."
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Smuldo |
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£50 11/01/17 20:01:12 |
16 |
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Thanks for your comments everyone, and your votes for the smallest caption ever ;-), it was a difficult month for captioning but Mark, William, Dan or Ian could have won also with their captions, keep up the good work guys and gals cheers .
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Steve Davies |
 30/10/16 16:18:47 |
1 |
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Witty and imaginative Steve, love it xxx
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Spud Gunn II |
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19/10/15 12:06:09 |
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The Wolf |
£50  18/06/19 20:00:13 |
21 |
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Wow! I can't believe I've won, such a nice surprise! Thank you very much for the votes and kind words. Also thanks to Chris for picking the caption but most importantly for giving us the site! It's a privilege to be on the board and a pleasure ...
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Welsh Rarebit |
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31/03/16 8:00:10 |
5 |
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Best of the week.
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Zac Kramer |
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The son shines out of his arse 14/10/15 20:08:22 |
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Cath Jones |
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11/11/14 12:00:06 |
5 |
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Thank you for the nice comments :-)
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Tosser Wivlov |
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Nice legs, shame about the faith. 12/02/13 12:46:36 |
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Spud Gunn |
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Lost Puppy... and I haven't seen my pussy for a while either. 05/01/13 10:58:11 |
2 |
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D C |
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£100 Portaloo, couldn't escape if I wanted to. 09/07/12 20:00:21 |
23 |
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John Glover |
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"Boris, there's some policemen at the front door?" 23/06/19 20:16:43 |
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Michael Winner |
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"This week, on 'Taking a Selfie Using a Galaxy Note 7'..." 15/06/19 12:55:33 |
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C CaMel |
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I've never finished a diet either. 11/06/19 20:00:49 |
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Had a similar idea but I decided to vastly over complicate mine and yours reads much better! Great Caption :)
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Tina Flowers |
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These stairs lead down to the best cellar. 21/10/18 20:06:51 |
1 |
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I think you might have a winner there. Great caption.
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C CaMel |
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£50 "The toothbrush behind the sink was massive but I managed" 11/05/18 17:23:33 |
19 |
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Thanks to Chris for the prize and thank you all for the kind comments! Biggest thanks to the poor bloke in the photo!Cheers all :D
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John Llamas |
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Charles did not even flinch as the Swallow flew into his nose. 01/12/16 8:34:50 |
8 |
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Well you've now got more for that comment Mark....
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Welsh Rarebit |
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£100 16/07/16 8:00:10 |
16 |
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Thanks for the nice comments guys.Toad/toed in the hole is one of those captions that occur quite often, I did one a few months before Fraser's, as have other captioners before that.
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Cath Jones |
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03/11/15 20:37:53 |
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Ian Skelding |
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It was a nice gesture by the Bulgarian Police Force to give informer Alexander Keepoff a Memorial. 03/09/15 20:00:10 |
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Mark England |
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12/03/14 12:37:33 |
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Smuldo |
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♫ They call me Mr Bum-Plastic...♫ 16/01/13 20:00:51 |
6 |
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Kenny Ireland |
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04/08/19 10:54:15 |
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James Lennox |
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23/03/19 8:46:34 |
3 |
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Haha. I don't mind chipping in a tenner for second place (it definitely will not be one of mine)!! Great caption. Genuinely choked on my toast. So thanks for nearly killing me!
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James Lennox |
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£50 22/01/19 8:22:17 |
19 |
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Thanks Dave and everyone else. Chuffed to be on the board and loving the spirit of Caption.me. Will continue to represent the hobbits down here in NZ. Cheers all.
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Tony Edwards |
£50  08/08/18 12:26:52 |
19 |
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"Nah, no one's left one 'ere."
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stone face |
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"It was quite a comfortable ride. Once I got used to sitting on my nan's face." 03/08/18 8:13:01 |
3 |
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Thanks Karen-If only you would have voted for it ,then I would have won the fifty quid and I wouldn't have had to sell one of the kids to make ends meet. But don't blame yourself Karen am sure you never meant to be so selfish. Once again thanks.
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Ian Skelding |
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31/05/18 20:00:17 |
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Michael Winner |
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Caution: Chinese Dragon costume thieves operate in this area. 01/05/18 20:16:15 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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£50 "When I asked you to give me a quote for the damage...?" 08/04/18 8:36:55 |
16 |
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Thanks everyone for your comments and votes :-)
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Mark England |
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30/07/13 12:21:55 |
3 |
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July's caption of the month, posted to the official caption.me Facebook page. Congrats!
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Tony Edwards |
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13/06/13 20:17:39 |
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Cath Jones |
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31/03/13 8:02:14 |
2 |
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Houston, wee have a problem.
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Tosser Wivlov |
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They met each other on the web. 15/01/13 20:42:18 |
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Roley Martin |
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8 out of 10 cats prefer Whiskies. 28/10/11 21:02:18 |
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Hercules Rockefeller |
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28/06/14 20:01:15 |
7 |
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Took me a while, I think it was the capital L. I think best caption of the week.
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Smuldo |
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27/08/13 12:57:39 |
8 |
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That word play was a double back flip with a full twist. Nicely done!
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Cath Jones |
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Barbara has a highly infectious laugh. 03/05/13 20:07:31 |
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Dan Dan |
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After watching their team lose again, the crowd turned ugly. 07/02/13 12:08:07 |
5 |
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or else they're just Man U fans
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Pete |
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£100 Norman could only afford the basic package from Dignitas. 14/09/12 9:00:35 |
13 |
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I've not seen this caption before, as I've not been a member that long. I've not laughed so much in a long time. There are captions, funny captions and, rarely, truly sidesplitting captions like this. Quintessentially fabulous.
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Mr. Toad |
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30/06/12 20:17:18 |
1 |
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Ian Skelding |
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03/10/11 11:00:16 |
1 |
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Leroy Brown |
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04/08/18 23:47:17 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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26/07/18 13:51:38 |
1 |
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Here's another one JG - caption.me/57912 :)
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stone face |
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£50 Gary was confident of his chances in this years novelty hat competition. 07/03/18 8:33:00 |
11 |
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Hat off to you, stone face, great caption.
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William Kay |
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It was definitely a no fly zone. 20/01/17 12:40:19 |
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Tony Edwards |
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29/03/16 22:03:44 |
1 |
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After proofreading your caption, I find it perfect.
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Lucky Elperro |
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I may have Parkinsons, but I can eat my own ice cream thank you very much. 07/09/15 12:18:26 |
3 |
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Kenny Ireland |
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15/06/15 20:18:24 |
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Michael Winner |
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It was several weeks before his landlady realised he'd left without paying. 29/12/14 20:12:10 |
2 |
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The following is not a joke; it's a compliment: If you show this image to a thousand people, 950 would just scratch their heads, 49 would make SOME sense out of it...and one, maybe just ONE would be funny. Congratulations! Nice caption, which is ...
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Mark England |
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02/05/19 8:16:05 |
1 |
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Michael Winner |
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"...so I said, 'what ceiling fan?'..." 18/04/19 20:37:57 |
5 |
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Keep chuckling to this a lot. It’s a brilliant caption 😃
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Scrappy Doo |
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09/04/19 4:05:51 |
3 |
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Thank you Dot Old.
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Paul Reeve |
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He got fed up with just fetching balls. 28/02/19 12:51:44 |
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Vanessa the Guesser |
£50  11/02/19 12:01:55 |
21 |
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Thank you for the votes and kind messages, they are much appreciated. Hope you all have a great weekend!
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John Llamas |
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........ just posting some pictures of my trip 10/01/19 8:41:39 |
1 |
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You must've had a lovely time. Is that a picture of your-niece, then? :^)
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Vanessa the Guesser |
£50  20/09/18 8:05:14 |
16 |
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I'm so excited to win! Thanks for the votes and comments.
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Karyn Harrison |
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Titanic - directed by Alfred Hitchcock. 31/07/18 20:48:18 |
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Pete |
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£50 It's unusual for a seagull to be scared of heights. 21/06/18 20:07:37 |
19 |
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I couldn't wait to find out who posted this caption. Absolutely brilliant, Pete. :)
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Ian Skelding |
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Great on the parcel shelf of a car. 23/05/18 14:08:30 |
4 |
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You got the record for "the longest fuse" on a caption:45 seconds before I got it...Congrats!!!
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Troompa Loompa |
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£50 "Oi mate! You're in the wrong quay." 11/02/18 21:07:10 |
13 |
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Well done Troompa - you hit the right note with that one.
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Michael Winner |
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£50 09/11/17 20:34:07 |
18 |
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Woo woo! Thanks for the comments and the votes everyone!
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Smuldo |
£50  09/10/17 20:28:10 |
24 |
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Smuldo has very kindly donated his prize toward the running of this site. Thanks and congrats again on a great caption.
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Pussy Galore |
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"Why are you leaving the job?" 11/02/17 20:48:38 |
1 |
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Thank you for all the votes. That's my highest score to date. :)
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Mark England |
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21/10/16 12:54:20 |
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Cath Jones |
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17/10/15 20:00:07 |
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Cath Jones |
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02/08/15 21:09:56 |
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Tony Edwards |
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15/10/14 8:31:28 |
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Helen Llamas |
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20/04/14 20:24:31 |
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Michael Winner |
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A mass grave of unknown snowmen. 05/02/14 8:00:09 |
6 |
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Fitting old jokes to captions isn't what I would do personally but each to their own, there's a big difference between getting inspiration from an old joke and then adapting it and citing an old gag word for word. A nod to the original is good f...
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C CaMel |
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12/11/12 12:07:39 |
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Dan Dan |
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02/09/12 12:03:49 |
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Cath Jones |
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£100 07/08/12 12:27:04 |
15 |
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Gordon Bannerman |
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Hitch-hiker killed in freak accident 07/06/12 11:14:26 |
7 |
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Lyarna Manley |
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15/05/12 11:22:15 |
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Linda D |
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12/05/12 20:00:21 |
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Pablo Cabello |
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05/05/12 20:00:09 |
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Michael Winner |
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"Permission to speak, Captain Mainwaring sir..." 24/03/14 20:00:55 |
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Glyn Evans |
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10/01/14 12:00:12 |
1 |
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Or "Marital Kombat" :-)
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Gordon Bannerman |
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Two Popes elected in Staffordshire 25/08/13 20:51:41 |
1 |
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I keep chuckling at this one.
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Gayna Dee |
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See A Penny..Pick It Up..All The Day You'll Have Good Luck 12/04/13 8:30:37 |
2 |
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Genius.
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John Glover |
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"So Mr Smith, are these all the hallucinogenics you have taken, and how are you feeling now?" 18/02/13 12:15:46 |
1 |
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This is cracking :-)
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Dan Dan |
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12/11/12 12:00:09 |
3 |
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Pete |
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09/11/12 8:13:13 |
2 |
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Mark England |
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18/09/12 20:10:56 |
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F Mackay |
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24/08/12 12:02:19 |
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John Glover |
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"Come on out you bastards, I'm supposed to be getting married in half an hour!" 06/07/12 11:11:12 |
2 |
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Dave Devine |
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24/06/12 11:00:11 |
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Christopher Harris |
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23/06/12 20:00:30 |
1 |
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Paul Woolley |
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08/06/12 20:00:06 |
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Pete |
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Men like him should be put behind bras. 16/05/12 11:03:56 |
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Mr. Toad |
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This disturbing image was found in the home of a known Speedophile. 02/05/12 20:00:49 |
2 |
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Naa they'r just trying to make a brief trunk call
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F Mackay |
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"I've got 10,000 twitter followers." 16/03/12 11:06:48 |
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Roley Martin |
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27/10/11 11:17:46 |
2 |
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C CaMel |
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Tue 20:43:44 |
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Mark England |
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"Flippin' hell, Edmund, Who cares if it's creased? Just stick the flag in the bloody summit" 24/06/19 20:30:04 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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£50 Children should be seen and not blurred. 10/05/19 8:49:01 |
22 |
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No ..that's exactly what I meant..I always propose to the monthly winner..and because am such a handsome bastard I just knew you'd say yes xx(PS I normally put in for a divorce once the fifty quid is spent.)
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Smuldo |
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04/05/19 20:00:10 |
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Joe |
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02/05/19 14:04:27 |
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Crunchy Chords |
 26/04/19 14:59:11 |
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Mr Dome |
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28/02/19 8:18:57 |
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Stu Dent |
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When I said I wanted a cake with a big number two on it I meant her age 08/02/19 20:05:14 |
1 |
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Typo "meant", but nice caption :)
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C CaMel |
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'live from the paper plane crash, as it unfolds.' 19/01/19 20:19:53 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
£50  15/12/18 12:00:10 |
17 |
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I'm over the moon! thanks everyone :-) I wish everyone a Happy New Year
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ant knee |
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23/10/18 12:00:17 |
2 |
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Funny Bean |
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07/10/18 12:00:09 |
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Chris Keegan |
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"Come on officer, I was only doing a fraction over" 17/09/18 12:00:08 |
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John Llamas |
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This sort of thing just makes me cross 07/09/18 8:14:55 |
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Smuldo |
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"Are you going out without putting a coat on ?..." 06/09/18 14:02:48 |
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Leroy Brown |
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06/08/18 8:23:05 |
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Chris Keegan |
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The final episode of Peppa Pig 02/11/17 8:14:09 |
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Ross Davidson |
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The next drink was complimentary. 19/07/16 11:52:50 |
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Michael Winner |
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22/03/16 12:03:32 |
1 |
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♫ I feel slitty, oh so slitty ♫
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Lucky Elperro |
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"Where's the snake darling?" 23/01/16 23:08:48 |
3 |
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Hey, Lucky. Like our friend, Zac, I see that you won two out of three in "your row." But, can you sweep a whole row, get a triple? No pressure. Just sayin'...you came pretty close.
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Dan Nicholls |
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22/09/15 20:06:38 |
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John Llamas |
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20/09/15 20:05:58 |
3 |
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Have to agree with Mr Glover - this is a winner.
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Greg Curtis |
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"Did I mention my boyfriend's a truck driver?" 02/08/15 9:43:57 |
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John Llamas |
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The locals were more accustomed to seeing stools washed up on the beach. 29/01/15 12:14:36 |
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Troompa Loompa |
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Dave wasn't impressed at how Legal and General settled his claim for the roof repair. 02/08/19 22:22:08 |
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Vanessa the Guesser |
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11/07/19 8:18:11 |
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Vanessa the Guesser |
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30/04/19 12:21:58 |
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Gavin Smithers |
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"I'm afraid we're giving the part to Ursula Andress" 26/04/19 9:59:08 |
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Chris Keegan |
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21/04/19 14:14:53 |
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Vivvy En |
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"Do you mind...? I work nights, you know." 28/02/19 20:54:27 |
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Glad You Remember |
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26/12/18 12:01:59 |
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Tina Flowers |
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28/11/18 21:55:22 |
2 |
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I agree with Dave, this one was so good I refused to attempt a caption...
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Mark England |
£50  01/10/18 20:04:56 |
20 |
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I'm absolutely thrilled. Thanks to everyone for the votes and kind comments
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stone face |
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"Has Nan gone out with that big glass ashtray in her mouth again?" 26/08/18 20:57:14 |
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Pete |
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09/08/18 20:22:44 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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"Beryl, can we go home now as I've got a Whopper of a headache." 29/07/18 20:08:29 |
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Neil Mackenzie |
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Essex Girls struggle to wear knickers on special occasions. 26/07/18 8:00:44 |
1 |
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Ah, that's 'cracked' me up. You're so mean.
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Tony Edwards |
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15/05/18 8:55:45 |
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Stephen Paterson |
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He'll be back in his crypt tonight. 10/05/18 12:14:18 |
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Jonathan Allsopp |
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£50 17/04/17 8:35:16 |
14 |
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Amazing. The comments mean a lot more than the 50. Very kind. May the silliness long continue!Thanks.
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Mark England |
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In his younger days, Don King had a fetish for licking squirrels arses 23/01/17 20:16:38 |
3 |
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It's based on Don King's unique hairstyle
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Ian Skelding |
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02/01/17 20:25:25 |
2 |
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That is the best caption for some time. Nice work.
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Stephen Paterson |
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22/12/16 12:01:58 |
2 |
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Thank you folks, that's now my best scoring caption. :-)
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Steve Wright |
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£50 Wally's swollen testicles were becoming a concern. 09/12/16 15:09:17 |
14 |
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Yeah truly fantastic caption
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Smuldo |
£50  03/11/16 8:02:11 |
11 |
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Thanks very much everyone,much appreciated and thanks to Chris for giving us a great site with superb captioneers, cheers 😁
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Greg Curtis |
£100  20/08/16 12:15:41 |
17 |
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Thanks for all the great feedback, gang! And thank you, Chris, for creating, and running this great site...which keeps us off the streets and out of trouble. The internet can be a dark place, but caption.me is a point of shimmering light - a place...
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Tony Edwards |
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"Umm.....what's this? DO NOT SPIT AT THE VISITORS." 21/07/16 20:35:59 |
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Steve Davies |
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"Let me see, Google , images , Medusa, ah shit. 25/10/15 20:20:14 |
2 |
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"Is that really you Medusa? Well stone me..."
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Tony Edwards |
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09/09/15 12:44:04 |
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Dan Nicholls |
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"Hello is that customer complaints? I need to return some goods...well, I ordered a leotard". 06/08/15 8:01:16 |
2 |
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From Amazon I presume. :-D
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Tony Edwards |
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"Alas, poor Yorick! I flew him well." 05/02/15 20:23:07 |
2 |
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He was raised as a fool.
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John Glover |
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They made me take my silverback. 27/01/15 12:02:16 |
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Pete |
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15/08/14 9:44:18 |
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Tracy Davidson |
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02/07/14 8:00:20 |
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Leroy Brown |
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Just done it..... In your new shoes! 24/06/14 20:00:57 |
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matt cunningham |
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16/03/14 9:37:01 |
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Brian Malco |
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"I told you we should've used heavier barrels to store the helium - go get the step ladders..." 05/03/14 20:09:07 |
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Michael Winner |
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"Nigella! Have you been on the coke again?" 15/12/13 8:30:56 |
1 |
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Now we know who's really behind the exhibits in Charles Saatchi's gallery. Damien Hurst? Tracy Emin? Neither can match the creativity of Nigella on coke.
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Mark England |
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27/08/13 20:01:41 |
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Hercules Rockefeller |
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27/03/13 12:00:30 |
2 |
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The Full Monty Python?
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Tony Edwards |
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17/01/13 8:02:46 |
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Dan Dan |
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£100 "You got a light?"..."I am the light Baby." 11/11/12 20:03:59 |
17 |
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Thank you for your kind comments and pm's. It's a privilege just to be part of such a fantastic site and group of people, and like it's been said before, this is the icing on the cake.
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John Llamas |
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18/09/12 8:17:42 |
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Ken Stapleton |
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14/08/12 8:00:16 |
1 |
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John Llamas |
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Water Raleigh and Francis Drake 11/08/12 11:01:06 |
7 |
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Michael Winner |
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"Young man, about these airbags you fitted for me..." 13/07/12 20:00:06 |
1 |
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Ethelia Fotherington-Smythe |
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02/07/12 20:00:17 |
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Pete |
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25/06/12 20:00:36 |
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Mr. Toad |
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I best be off- the wifell be having kittens. 28/10/11 20:02:31 |
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Grant Amey |
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£50 Andrex puppies just don't make good police dogs 30/09/11 11:29:19 |
12 |
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Troompa Loompa |
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10/07/19 20:00:10 |
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Stu Dent |
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There you go love now let mommy have a piss in peace 02/07/19 8:40:47 |
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Troompa Loompa |
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Unfortunately the family were separated when Tom was posted overseas. 30/06/19 20:30:03 |
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Troompa Loompa |
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£50 "Thanks for the prize, now open the till and put all the cash into this bag." 28/06/19 8:31:55 |
17 |
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Thanks for all you kind words everyone.Thanks for the prize Chris, now open the drawer and put all the guns into this bag. :D
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Trace Sarge |
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20/06/19 12:07:27 |
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The Wolf |
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“I’m sorry for yawning but I find your company really boring” 12/06/19 12:25:47 |
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The Wolf |
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Filming has begun for the highly anticipated new period drama 05/06/19 8:10:30 |
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 Anthony Smith |
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12/05/19 9:36:14 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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05/05/19 8:00:39 |
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Chris Keegan |
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When I suddenly saw this in the road I had to break fast. 05/03/19 8:00:15 |
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Chris Keegan |
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"I'll have the table cloth please" 10/02/19 9:57:28 |
2 |
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This was a tough pic. Well done.
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Spycenwolf |
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He suddenly understood the gravity of the situation. 24/01/19 20:12:55 |
1 |
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And after he'd eaten him he became one of Newton's Cores.
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Stu Dent |
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22/01/19 8:00:08 |
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Dave Bryan |
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''Don't worry, his Bach is worse than his bite.'' 17/12/18 8:00:36 |
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Chris Keegan |
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No wonder it's tired, it came in at twenty to one. 16/12/18 12:00:20 |
1 |
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I find it odd.
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Dave Bryan |
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£50 ''If you buy ten packs, we'll throw in the towel.'' 08/11/18 20:16:31 |
14 |
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Many thanks for the kind comments. Looking at the quality of the previous winners, I'm delighted to now be one of them.The dosh will also come in useful. Next time my wife says ''Are you wasting your time doing those stupid captions again...
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Mark England |
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22/10/18 20:44:22 |
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Charles Gleason |
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"Let's go home Mary. Ten years camping out here and still no sign of the monster." 26/09/18 8:10:46 |
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Charles Gleason |
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15/09/18 8:02:14 |
3 |
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I hadn't thought of that.It Disney really matter to me.Thanks for the input.
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Tony Edwards |
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02/09/18 8:22:17 |
1 |
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Definitely not a case of the runs, Forrest, runs.
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Karyn Harrison |
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26/08/18 20:00:24 |
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stone face |
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" I told you before we got on the plane, to just give him the fuckin bread." 05/08/18 9:40:54 |
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Mr Dome |
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23/07/18 12:45:34 |
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Dan Nicholls |
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06/06/18 8:09:42 |
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Welsh Rarebit |
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12/05/18 20:00:07 |
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Chris Keegan |
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15/04/18 20:04:11 |
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John Glover |
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"Shit, I've left all my groceries at the school gate." 01/03/18 12:46:32 |
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Pete |
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£50 "Don't move, love...the reception is perfect now." 16/12/17 14:52:25 |
9 |
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Congratulations Pete! I love your quirky sense of humour. :)
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Stephen Paterson |
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Brian was incredibly nervous about his upcoming appearance on Mastermind. 30/09/17 12:15:44 |
2 |
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It brings a new meaning to the phrase "I've started so I'll finish"!
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more captions