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Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

£50
WINNER

For when you need to answer the call of nature.

27/06/20 12:00:12

 17
Many thanks everyone for your kind words and apologies to Rachel P and the others I sneaked ahead of at the last minute. 😊 --Troompa Loompa
Paul Woolley Vote score: 3354Paul Woolley

"...and all those in favour of reducing the tax on lettuce?"

29/04/20 20:23:09

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Lucy went to extreme lengths to protect herself from the Coronavirus. Unfortunately, she'd forgotten that opening an umbrella indoors was unlucky and she was run over by a bus on the way home.

28/03/20 20:10:40

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

''How are you going to cure me?''

''Just Like That!''

26/02/20 12:03:06

 10
I had a teacher who used to set his alarm for 3am so he could get up and have a ciggy... --James Lennox
James Lennox Vote score: 5753James Lennox

Javelins should only be thrown outdoors.

03/02/20 12:00:41

 1
The good news is she was standing just past the world record distance. --Willie Johnson
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 12558Vanessa the Guesser

This lamb's a bit tough.

19/01/20 13:30:10

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4802Karyn Harrison

Looks like Mike's got rid of his old satellite dish and gone digital!

26/08/19 20:01:47

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

Broke Bike Mountain

10/07/19 20:00:10

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4275Stu Dent

There you go love now let mommy have a piss in peace

02/07/19 8:40:47

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

Unfortunately the family were separated when Tom was posted overseas.

30/06/19 20:30:03

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

£50
WINNER

"Thanks for the prize, now open the till and put all the cash into this bag."

28/06/19 8:31:55

 17
Thanks for all you kind words everyone.Thanks for the prize Chris, now open the drawer and put all the guns into this bag. :D --Troompa Loompa
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2548Trace Sarge

Four Funerals and a Wedding

20/06/19 12:07:27

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

“I’m sorry for yawning but I find your company really boring”

12/06/19 12:25:47

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Filming has begun for the highly anticipated new period drama

05/06/19 8:10:30

 
Anthony Smith Vote score: 83Anthony Smith

One Knight stand!

12/05/19 9:36:14

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

Lord of the Rings

05/05/19 8:00:39

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

When I suddenly saw this in the road I had to break fast.

05/03/19 8:00:15

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

"I'll have the table cloth please"

10/02/19 9:57:28

 2
This was a tough pic. Well done. --James Lennox
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 874Spycenwolf

He suddenly understood the gravity of the situation.

24/01/19 20:12:55

 1
And after he'd eaten him he became one of Newton's Cores. --Karyn Harrison
Stu Dent Vote score: 4275Stu Dent

Turn the other cheek

22/01/19 8:00:08

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

''Don't worry, his Bach is worse than his bite.''

17/12/18 8:00:36

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

No wonder it's tired, it came in at twenty to one.

16/12/18 12:00:20

 1
I find it odd. --Scrappy Doo
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

£50
WINNER

''If you buy ten packs, we'll throw in the towel.''

08/11/18 20:16:31

 14
Many thanks for the kind comments. Looking at the quality of the previous winners, I'm delighted to now be one of them.The dosh will also come in useful. Next time my wife says ''Are you wasting your time doing those stupid captions again... --Dave Bryan
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

Police arrange an identity parade for a woman who claims that she was being watched through a keyhole of a swimming pool changing room

22/10/18 20:44:22

 
Charles Gleason Vote score: 834Charles Gleason

"Let's go home Mary. Ten years camping out here and still no sign of the monster."

26/09/18 8:10:46

 
Charles Gleason Vote score: 834Charles Gleason

The Lion Cling.

15/09/18 8:02:14

 3
I hadn't thought of that.It Disney really matter to me.Thanks for the input. --Charles Gleason
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Forrest Dump

02/09/18 8:22:17

 1
Definitely not a case of the runs, Forrest, runs. --Glad You Remember
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4802Karyn Harrison

Gnashtray

26/08/18 20:00:24

 
stone face Vote score: 7779stone face

" I told you before we got on the plane, to just give him the fuckin bread."

05/08/18 9:40:54

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9924Mr Dome

The Grateful Dead

23/07/18 12:45:34

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15104Dan Nicholls

It's a sign of desperation

06/06/18 8:09:42

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

For clumsy clots

12/05/18 20:00:07

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

Stand up comic

15/04/18 20:04:11

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20701John Glover

"Shit, I've left all my groceries at the school gate."

01/03/18 12:46:32

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

£50
WINNER

"Don't move, love...the reception is perfect now."

16/12/17 14:52:25

 9
Congratulations Pete! I love your quirky sense of humour. :)  --Pussy Galore
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3286Stephen Paterson

Brian was incredibly nervous about his upcoming appearance on Mastermind.

30/09/17 12:15:44

 2
It brings a new meaning to the phrase "I've started so I'll finish"! --Paul Woolley
C CaMel Vote score: 5753C CaMel

£50
WINNER

"Attention, this vehicle is versing!"

22/09/17 20:24:42

 15
Hi All, totally chuffed to be picked! Thank you to Chris for a brilliant site and to all fellow captioneers for the hilarious captions which keep me coming back for more!  --C CaMel
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

It's situated in a close knit community

15/02/17 20:06:24

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

Before the invention of video games, we had to play the analogue version of Space Invaders.

18/01/17 13:36:29

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5753C CaMel

'I'll have the salad, I've been eating shit lately'

22/10/16 20:04:29

 1
lol man --sandeep chahal
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5960Tosser Wivlov

I think she's about to toe it away.

09/04/16 12:33:31

 1
Very funny. --Pete
Tracy Davidson Vote score: 9777Tracy Davidson

"For the last time, will you stop playing those bloody drums!"

31/03/16 15:07:53

 
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

Captioneer in Cumbria is determined not to miss the 12 o'clock photo.

08/12/15 12:00:59

 
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3286Stephen Paterson

Indognito.

12/09/15 9:01:42

 
Tracy Davidson Vote score: 9777Tracy Davidson

Pupcakes

11/09/15 20:00:09

 5
It's a fantastic caption. I'm just unhappy that I didn't think of it (self-flagellation with a thorny branch now begins..) --AXE
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

Alcohol de-pendant

26/08/15 20:11:16

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20701John Glover

"Why can't we be smuggled into Britain just like the others, in the back of a truck?"

28/07/15 21:46:14

 1
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Grasper Carrot

27/07/15 8:01:25

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15104Dan Nicholls

Can't come out tonight I'm washing my hare.

26/07/15 8:00:23

 
Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

Just what I need to play my Hip-Op records

16/07/15 12:00:35

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

They have taken the holy vowels.

09/03/15 12:01:50

 
Ian Searle Vote score: 2409Ian Searle

" AND I'M TELLIN' YOU... GRADED GRAINS MAKE FINER FLOUR!!!!!"

26/02/15 8:54:38

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6722Glyn Evans

Dread Man Walking.

29/10/14 9:04:37

 
Ian Searle Vote score: 2409Ian Searle

Moon River by Henry Mankini

23/10/14 9:02:51

 
Boycie Vote score: 6699Boycie

# Our kestrel manoevered in the park.

22/09/14 8:30:08

 
AXE Vote score: 3690AXE

"I took de wheel off 'cause de brakes were Jamming, were Jamming..."

17/09/14 20:03:59

 
Ian Mclaren Vote score: 3524Ian Mclaren

All those who want to learn how to swim put your hands up.

17/08/14 20:04:37

 
Ron  Allan Vote score: 5481Ron Allan

Yes, it really took it's toll on his legs, but Warwick found his passenger numbers increased twenty fold when he attached the larger sidecar.

10/08/14 9:19:28

 1
died laughing --sandeep chahal
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

♫ "I'm a little teapot, short and kraut..."

05/08/14 20:00:06

 
Doh Nutter Vote score: 19025Doh Nutter

The Wife of Pi

20/06/14 13:02:51

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

In-turd.

06/05/14 20:24:46

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

"Hello, Abbey Taxis? I saw your advert and I'd like to apply for the job…"

02/05/14 8:00:07

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

2B or not 2B

20/02/14 12:00:13

 1
In 3D --John Glover
Mr Blonde Vote score: 19025Mr Blonde

New Star Wars film criticised for containing excessive violins.

19/09/13 12:40:39

 
Dan Dan Vote score: 5606Dan Dan

"Dad, why does that balloon in your wallet taste like Strawberries?"

25/08/13 8:00:10

 
Gordon Bannerman Vote score: 4691Gordon Bannerman

"Yeah, when we filmed Animal Hospital that Rolf character touched me here ... and other places"

08/08/13 21:15:56

 2
August's caption of the month, posted to the official caption.me Facebook page. Congrats! --Chris Beach
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6722Glyn Evans

"The milky bras are on me."

05/07/13 12:05:39

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5960Tosser Wivlov

....place casserole in oven, stand on top shelf.

02/05/13 10:03:09

 
Helen Llamas Vote score: 933Helen Llamas

Dentistree.

05/04/13 8:10:10

 1
:o can't believe i opted against using this one :( --Ross Davidson
Ian Mclaren Vote score: 3524Ian Mclaren

Ani-mating.

20/03/13 13:19:15

 3
"see 12:13:43 and 12:47:38" Aw c'mon, thats very nit picky? ani-mating is a play on shagging, the other two don't make the 'mate' part of animate meaning anything other than it's original meaning.  --Spud Gunn
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

Queue Gardens.

08/02/13 20:09:45

 2
@anon, you might want to consider putting in 'Designed by Parkability Brown' as a caption :) --Michael Winner
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

“That looks perfect Neil. We’ll come back tonight and film it with the spacesuit on.”

20/01/13 20:35:06

 1
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

Even at her age, Emily has no problem with her Joints.

11/01/13 20:00:08

 
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

It is often found in Fairies Rings.

05/01/13 12:00:40

 
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

"This house is possessed by the Breville."

10/11/12 8:34:41

 
crm Vote score: 294crm

.....but you didn't turn up til 9!"

27/10/12 12:02:23

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

Investigators were fairly confident that they had found the John Denver crash site.

27/09/12 20:00:27

 3
Tony Busby Vote score: 2069Tony Busby

Soaprano

17/09/12 20:02:08

 
Ken Stapleton Vote score: 1589Ken Stapleton

He still hasn't stirred

15/09/12 8:23:55

 1
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10836Neil Mackenzie

Are you a member of the AA Sir.
Yes but I missed my session today.

10/07/12 20:08:08

 2
Ken Stapleton Vote score: 1589Ken Stapleton

"Glove is in the air"

24/06/12 11:16:50

 
Joe T Vote score: 3133Joe T

For the love of God Victoria, please eat something.

08/06/12 20:06:33

 
Rob Falconer Vote score: 3359Rob Falconer

For the furnishings, we went to BIKEA

05/05/12 20:03:09

 1
Suzanne Brooks Vote score: 729Suzanne Brooks

Dave never liked fast food.

16/04/12 11:00:46

 1
Pablo Cabello Vote score: 3393Pablo Cabello

£50
WINNER

Lust in Translation.

27/01/12 11:22:25

 11
Lee Hauxwell Vote score: 2995Lee Hauxwell

£50
WINNER

The first passenger flight of Derry Air

15/08/11 11:12:49

 14
James Lennox Vote score: 5753James Lennox

The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on.

31/07/20 8:09:57

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2082Rachel P

The oX Files

04/06/20 20:11:10

 1
The truth is snout hair. :^) --Crunchy Chords
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

''This is a station announcement for all those passengers wishing to commit suicide: The train due to be arriving on platform 1 will now be arriving on Platform 2.''

27/05/20 21:12:30

 2
Looks like there'll be no departures today. --Karyn Harrison
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

Due to a bagpipe shortage, Luton's 'Scottish Exile Pipe Band' had to improvise

22/05/20 12:12:57

 1
But it was a bit of a Wee Crankie idea. --Woofer 6
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

''I'm absolutely worn out, prowling round Essex all night trying to find a virgin.''

01/05/20 12:13:13

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9924Mr Dome

Hello madam. Allow me to push your stool in

04/04/20 9:41:59

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

“So, I’m just chilling in the garden, minding my own business and having a bit of a snooze, and then it happened. F*cking lawnmower. I know he’s bored but the quicker that bastard goes back to work the better”

03/04/20 12:00:39

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Being a first responder to a car accident on the Simpsons was a sobering experience…

02/04/20 12:00:09

 1
Looks like he's covered in Marge. --Karyn Harrison
Stu Dent Vote score: 4275Stu Dent

Message in a Brothel

29/01/20 20:18:23

 1
A sting operation resulted in a successful police raid. --Dave Bryan
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Pepper pig

01/12/19 20:00:06

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

£50
WINNER

For your rise only

25/11/19 8:00:08

 15
Thanks everyone for the comments and votes. November has been a very lucky month, winning 5 times on the lottery (grand total of £67.60!) and now on caption.me! --Welsh Rarebit
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Beef Wellingtons

16/09/19 20:00:05

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6177Vivvy En

£50
WINNER

"Why are you upset...? I said 'I'd give you a ring from Cartier'."

03/09/19 13:31:20

 17
Thanks to everyone for your kind comments and votes. I am reeling from the shock! To be in the captioners gallery is an accolade I truly never expected. I am honoured. A big thank you goes to Chris for providing this platform for us lovers of word... --Vivvy En
stone face Vote score: 7779stone face

"Must definitely go to Specsavers tomorrow." Joanne said to herself. As she wondered why the train was taking so long to leave the station.

31/08/19 8:14:50

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

Early gurning centre

14/08/19 8:02:06

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

Stop Luke and listen.

10/08/19 20:35:10

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Shopping Maul

08/08/19 20:44:45

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15104Dan Nicholls

I wouldn't put my arson that.

16/07/19 12:04:15

 
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

"Good afternoon. Today, we are in Delhi, for the semi finals of the Extreme Jenga Championship.."

30/06/19 12:05:59

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5753C CaMel

Worth a shot

28/06/19 8:21:50

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 12558Vanessa the Guesser

"Well done, dear"

20/06/19 20:01:49

 1
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

Cash test dummies

12/05/19 20:21:22

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

The Snuggly Duckling

03/05/19 8:00:09

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7282The Wolf

Goblet

24/04/19 12:51:55

 
Mr. Toad Vote score: 1738Mr. Toad

Stewards enquiry after tortoise lodges an official complaint

19/04/19 12:00:37

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6722Glyn Evans

The tortoise and the hair.

24/02/19 12:28:25

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

"Borrow the car? Oh Philip, you do make one laugh sometimes"

16/02/19 12:00:07

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9924Mr Dome

Leading him a stray

09/02/19 8:08:34

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15104Dan Nicholls

Stig of the dump.

08/12/18 8:59:38

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4802Karyn Harrison

Fancy going for a spin?

06/12/18 20:00:46

 
Tina  Flowers Vote score: 663Tina Flowers

'I'm the bus in-spectre'.

31/10/18 20:17:56

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4802Karyn Harrison

Drum kit

21/10/18 12:00:14

 
Charles Gleason Vote score: 834Charles Gleason

"Have you any idea how many people have been looking for you ?"

10/09/18 8:01:18

 
ant knee Vote score: 1134ant knee

Gang, nan style

13/08/18 12:00:24

 
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3286Stephen Paterson

£50
WINNER

This week on When Dogs Look Like Their Owners:  Piers Morgan.

18/07/18 0:32:15

 15
Woof! Wasn't expecting that. Nice one Folks! --Stephen Paterson
Tiny Alien Vote score: 492Tiny Alien

Yoda Phone

28/06/18 8:15:55

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9924Mr Dome

Eaves-droppings

21/06/18 20:33:04

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4951Kenny Ireland

Fruit and nut.

17/06/18 9:35:49

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

Message in a brothel

16/06/18 20:02:37

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

The Invisible Man gets a right good kicking.

12/06/18 20:00:13

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6177Vivvy En

Dave, a budding photographer, really hoped the bird would fly off so he could take a better shot

11/06/18 20:39:08

 2
Took me a while, just twigged it.Great caption. --John Glover
C CaMel Vote score: 5753C CaMel

"I can hardly walk in these eels!"

01/06/18 8:09:09

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"Bloody hell Jim, now you put the toilet seat down."

05/11/17 12:01:38

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

Slumdog pillion heirs

22/08/17 20:04:13

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"He needs a clip around the ears."

16/02/17 20:01:30

 1
Curiously, our local barber shop is actually called a Clip Around The Ears.  --Pussy Galore
John  Glover Vote score: 20701John Glover

"Yes, I am an architect, but I compile crossword puzzles on the side."

06/02/17 12:18:16

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

How many times do I have to tell the kids not to accept lifts from strangers?

15/01/17 12:03:17

 1
Thanks for the votes everyone, this is my highest-scoring caption to date. :)  --Pussy Galore
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Best Man's Friend

05/12/16 20:12:16

 3
Great caption Tony  --Andrea Hickling
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6722Glyn Evans

"I don't know how I got burnt, I've had my sun screen on all day."

11/11/16 20:08:44

 1
hahaha, took me some time.'sun screen' --sandeep chahal
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

"That reminds me, we must get the voltage adjusted on that electric fence."

17/10/16 20:31:44

 2
Come fry with me... --Pussy Galore
Smuldo Vote score: 11674Smuldo

Igor's hopes of a medal were now in Limbo.

18/08/16 20:09:46

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

The impressive collection from Arkwright's till.

29/06/16 15:13:21

 
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

"All I did was order a pint of cider"

02/04/16 20:05:57

 
Ron  Allan Vote score: 5481Ron Allan

It's obviously not ground coffee

05/02/16 16:31:02

 1
The down votes showing here appear to be the result of a bug I introduced with my recent changes to the voting code. I'll look into this ASAP.  --Chris Beach
John  Glover Vote score: 20701John Glover

"Shit, so what did we have put down?"

25/01/16 21:58:26

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"Sonja, for chrissakes, pull the cord."

25/01/16 8:04:44

 1
Without your brilliant buildup, this caption would have fallen flat. (No pun intended.) Nice job!!!  --Greg Curtis
Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

Sworded affair

23/11/15 20:07:37

 
John Llamas Vote score: 20016John Llamas

"I reared him myself."

14/10/15 20:10:32

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4551Lucky Elperro

Deaf version.

12/10/15 16:30:15

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5960Tosser Wivlov

Honey, have you checked on the twins?

06/10/15 9:41:27

 
John Llamas Vote score: 20016John Llamas

We didn't always have hair dryers

23/09/15 12:15:06

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

Eventually they tried other projectiles, but by then the name had stuck: 'catapult'.

20/07/15 8:04:20

 
John Llamas Vote score: 20016John Llamas

Pisa Hut

02/02/15 8:11:39

 
AXE Vote score: 3690AXE

"Paul, you're going out with me now - why does your X have to go everywhere with us?"

09/12/14 20:10:51

 1
Maybe it's a sign of things to come --Ben Samuel
AXE Vote score: 3690AXE

Pot belly

20/11/14 8:00:08

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Deers looking at you kid.

21/10/14 12:53:38

 2
Keep looking back at your caption. I love the captions that make me think "SO-OBVIOUS-but-I-never-would-have-thought-of-that-in-a-million-years." .....Nice job! --Greg Curtis
Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

Reading from top to bottom down the side of the coins...
someone has subtly managed to get a very rude word onto caption.me...
Dirty fluckr!

07/10/14 21:53:27

 3
I think your right on the money there. --Chris Moorhead
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4951Kenny Ireland

Steve does not look too happy but he will soon be chuffed to bits.

27/08/14 6:38:03

 
AXE Vote score: 3690AXE

"Damn! I've completely missed the Finnish line"

14/08/14 20:00:04

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

There's always one practical joker outside a Mosque.

11/08/14 8:08:55

 1
Bless my sole. --John Glover
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Paul Daniels looks lost without Debbie McGee.

03/08/14 8:32:52

 3
What did Paul Daniels say when three thousand blue whales ejaculated in his mouth? Not a lot. --Michael Monkhouse
Doh Nutter Vote score: 19025Doh Nutter

"Do you know the Barber of Seville?...Well bloody well go and see him then."

22/07/14 8:56:53

 1
Funny and clever. --Michael Monkhouse
Ross Davidson Vote score: 1681Ross Davidson

Laughing stock.

17/07/14 12:38:50

 2
I posted one about palmed laughter that didn't quite work, but I'm kicking myself for not getting this. Very apt and succinct. :) --Chris Moorhead
Michael Winner Vote score: 23241Michael Winner

In an Espace, no one can hear you scream.

23/06/14 8:04:48

 
Tracy Davidson Vote score: 9777Tracy Davidson

Lymphomaniac.

13/06/14 13:28:16

 2
Love it, one of those 'I wish I'd thought of that one' moments. --John Glover
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

"Ass to la vista, Baby!"

29/04/14 20:06:34

 6
Cheers Ian. I get it now. I've had a long day :) --Mark England
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"Ground control to Ginger Tom"

14/04/14 20:08:28

 2
Ginger Tom perhaps? Would get my vote:) --Zac Kramer
John  Glover Vote score: 20701John Glover

The tourin' shroud.

26/03/14 12:58:08

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"Let me atom."

17/03/14 9:23:37

 
Dave Mackay Vote score: 899Dave Mackay

"I said "She needs a new collar", you prat".

28/02/14 12:18:07

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

"If this doesn't give me an orgasm, nothing will."

28/12/13 13:41:48

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5960Tosser Wivlov

We only wear them for special equations.

10/11/13 20:36:45

 1
Undoubtedly Caption of the Week if ever there was one- fantastic! --Michael Winner
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22478Ian Skelding

"Not much longer now sweetheart, you're nearly dry."

08/08/13 9:01:23

 1
Nice caption. A true laugh... --HillHermit Studios
Smuldo Vote score: 11674Smuldo

A Penis Flytrap.

21/03/13 8:01:28

 3
"There must be easier ways to catch flies" You could fall asleep with your mouth open, then snap it shut when your salt receptors fire. --Spud Gunn
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

Rex marks the Plot.

15/02/13 12:00:46

 2
over my dead body ! --Spud Gunn
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

A groom with a view.

09/02/13 8:56:47

 
Mark Leyshon Vote score: 118Mark Leyshon

The early version of Deal or No Deal

16/01/13 9:47:12

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

Salvador Dalek.

13/01/13 10:09:51

 
John Llamas Vote score: 20016John Llamas

Teaching an Ostrich to ride a motorbike was always going to prove difficult

04/01/13 12:17:10

 4
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Sultans of Swing.

03/01/13 12:39:54

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

The offical photographs of Guantanamo Bay don't fool anyone.

03/01/13 12:12:23

 
phil mcavity Vote score: 423phil mcavity

'Next time I'm having a caesarian.'

05/09/12 12:54:25

 1
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

Jack was beginning to doubt that the best way to travel around London was by Tube.

01/09/12 8:25:29

 
Steve Hann Vote score: 1082Steve Hann

It's just a figure of speech.

17/07/12 20:07:56

 
Joe T Vote score: 3133Joe T

For safety of other drivers I think we should put a few cones out.

12/07/12 11:18:32

 1
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5960Tosser Wivlov

The mourning after the flight before.

10/07/12 12:22:22

 
Dave Devine Vote score: 1725Dave Devine

Britain was heading for meltdown

03/07/12 11:12:55

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Booked for driving without a Creche Helmet.

14/06/12 11:02:45

 
Walter White Vote score: 336Walter White

"No your Holiness, I said show them your cross"

13/06/12 11:16:16

 2
Antony Ward Vote score: 156Antony Ward

Guns and Rosaries

13/06/12 11:09:12

 1
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

Furniture Swearhouse.

28/05/12 20:00:34

 
Cath Jones Vote score: 38790Cath Jones

"Jim, have you got rid of that slag yet?"

22/05/12 20:23:53

 1
Lee Hauxwell Vote score: 2995Lee Hauxwell

A Little me time

11/05/12 11:34:57

 1
Pablo Cabello Vote score: 3393Pablo Cabello

Carl's berg.

30/04/12 20:16:40

 1
Mr. Toad Vote score: 1738Mr. Toad

Ive met his wife and sister. A lovely woman.

25/04/12 11:07:27

 1
Ethelia Fotherington-Smythe Vote score: 2362Ethelia Fotherington-Smythe

Have you seen the new Eddie Murphy trailer?

04/04/12 11:00:08

 
F Mackay Vote score: 19025F Mackay

Schindler's Lift.

01/04/12 20:05:39

 8
Bob Geddon Vote score: 94Bob Geddon

How much is that doggie in the Windows?

11/11/11 11:07:51

 7
Shouldn't that be Windows? --Rob Falconer
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32092Tony Edwards

Mel and Cauli

02/11/11 11:03:46

 1
Tad T Vote score: 344Tad T

Vishnu were here

26/08/11 11:29:46

 1

"See THAT...? THAT is how you do a French manicure."

Tue 12:32:31

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19025Troompa Loompa

Worker having a drink on his lunch break before he has to get back to the plant.

16/07/20 21:08:28

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10375Dave Bryan

New 'Ice Age' movie ruined by product placement say critics.

16/07/20 8:33:51

 
Mark England Vote score: 17067Mark England

"Come on you two. Smoke break is over. Those chimneys ain't gonna clean themselves"

08/07/20 8:25:57

 
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