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Guideaux .

signed up: 8 years, 3 months ago
profile viewed: 3 time(s) this week
caption quota: 14
votes given since joining: 5,496
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Amsterdam

Age: 40

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captions

Running out of police officers and soldiers, as a last resort London Zoo jumps in to help secure the 2012 Olympics.

19/07/12 20:00:14

Brilliance! --Chris Beach

Spitting Image

01/10/11 11:01:17

"Fire in the Hole!"

12/02/13 20:18:27

The Iranian athlete who dissapointedly finished last in the steeplechase, was given an incentive to save his country's honor at the Paralympics.

21/08/12 20:01:20

Hundreds of desperate unemployed EU refugees undertake a long and hazardous journey across the mediterranean in hope of a better future in Africa.

16/08/12 11:03:31

Le Coq Sportif.

06/03/16 21:29:26

"Say Cheese!"

06/05/15 12:22:19

A Delft Hitler.

05/08/14 20:04:34

"Anyone seen my other oven glove?"

14/10/13 20:25:53

Just want to say that this is the funniest caption I've seen this week- just brilliant. --Michael Winner

lol

Know your customer. Lesson 54:
How to say hi to the Masaai.

03/01/13 11:02:07

"Felix you forgot your lunchbox!"

24/11/12 20:03:20

lol

"I put in plenty of change, now what's keeping the bloody coke bottle?!"

06/01/14 12:41:48

♫ Say a boot's upside your head, say a boot's upside your head. ♫

24/07/12 20:00:14

"The only thing I need now are 6000 hamsters".

27/06/12 16:25:19

"Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep"

01/11/12 12:32:01

"I hope my grandson will be happy when he opens his birthday card and the 10.000 pound cheque".

01/07/12 11:16:09

"Woman Overbored"!

07/02/12 20:02:52

Now that's a weird fortune cookie!

22/11/13 21:03:08

creative

Snakes on a pain.

26/08/13 20:13:54

Ha ha ha ha hailing a cab, hailing a cab.

23/11/12 8:37:00

"It was heavenly, but please stop calling my dad's name when climaxing."

11/11/12 20:05:58

Infant Van Gogh.

14/05/12 18:24:16

I need backcup!

15/11/11 20:01:49

lol

If you move 3 of them you can make 4 triangles..

20/03/13 20:06:09

Best before: June 2128.

29/12/12 20:00:14

"Are you sure the bomb threat was part of the play?"

23/02/12 12:54:03

Snow Patrol.

19/02/12 20:08:34

Max felt Alienated.

01/02/12 20:00:11

Gordon Ramsay opens new restaurant in Korea.

24/01/12 11:13:08

♪ Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for meeeeeeeeeee! ♪

18/01/12 11:00:08

"That's very nice honey, now back to your webcam."

03/03/16 20:14:21

24/12/13 9:06:28

05/06/13 9:21:25

17/04/13 20:09:34

26/03/13 8:05:16

30/03/12 13:17:44

06/11/11 12:24:07

06/10/11 11:00:24

The Fashion of the Christ.

21/08/11 11:13:51

lol

Poop Art

13/05/16 20:58:46

♫ I'm singing in the Rhine. ♫

22/03/16 9:49:06

Mixed Martial Arse.

07/03/16 13:14:34

creative

"Don't worry dad, we took the hamster out before we lit the matches."

26/05/14 12:29:40

"Sounds like the clutch has gone Pete."

25/09/13 13:03:42

Advantage Pete Pampers.

07/05/13 12:20:39

"I don't exactly know what happened officer, first there were reindeer crossing the road followed by a flying sled!"

24/12/12 12:04:35

The Devil's Advocaat.

22/12/12 20:40:52

Another successful Boot Sale.

19/04/12 20:33:39

Save the Ale.

24/02/12 11:14:37

F#%%@&*!! Not one pair!

07/12/11 11:01:51

Cause of death: Sofacation.

30/09/11 11:15:17

Look George, Lovebite 1985 left you a message..

15/09/11 11:48:01

Rumanians believed to be behind mysterious disappearances of houses from African villages.

27/10/13 12:00:44

"All hands on Dick!"

23/05/13 20:04:21

All hands on Dick? --Zac Kramer

Trigger Finger.

14/01/13 20:21:57

"A wedding ring? Never!"

14/01/13 20:11:01

May the Ford be with you.

23/11/12 20:01:02

"No time to explain, just say we found it like this when we got here"

11/09/12 21:35:51

Marbellous!

14/01/12 12:27:42

Another one bites the crust.

18/11/11 11:13:28

Are you a leg or a breast man?

20/09/11 18:28:08

Let me teach you about the long arm of the law constable Harris.

18/08/11 11:29:27

My first Bagpipe.

14/01/14 21:06:43

Sci-Pie.

03/08/13 13:59:45

Boulevard of Broken Streams.

02/04/13 20:07:16

The Wedding Flashers.

29/07/12 20:03:50

Dave suffered from chronic nightstares.

15/07/12 20:00:25

Lord Sugar: "you're all fired!"

08/06/12 11:29:04

After a divorce, the woman often takes the house.

20/02/12 11:06:33

Madama Butterfly

24/01/12 20:00:06

Doris was even late for her own funeral.

09/11/11 20:00:10

Chris adding some embedded marketing on Caption.me

07/09/11 11:52:58

Spot the 75 differences.

17/07/11 11:28:07

"Would you like 3M of garlic bread with that?"

18/04/16 12:06:24

Windows Patch.

23/03/16 14:21:40

"Just in time, I was running low."

19/03/16 20:04:35

"Why are you writing such filth?"
- "It's a tattoo for some dumb westener that wants me to create his name in Chinese Astrology, so I thought this will put a smile on the face of the guy taking his order next time he visits a Chinese restaurant."

04/03/15 21:15:36

"..and tomorrow I will finish my masterpiece."
-"Don't forget to bring enough grey."

17/06/18 20:18:34

Two-legged circus dog rudely pulled off stage.

30/07/17 20:04:55

The Cadillac Jellyfish waits for a Hatchback to pass underneath to swallow it whole.

19/03/16 21:02:52

Steamboat

04/05/15 12:05:59

Mitsubitchy.

29/04/15 20:03:54

Between a rock and a hard case.

27/11/14 20:00:22

Granacondad.

17/01/14 20:01:43

Don't know why this isn't getting more votes, it's brilliant! --Michael Winner

JFKFC

22/11/13 21:00:17

lol

The day after the farting contest.

07/09/13 8:00:54

Woodshock.

21/08/13 8:35:44

lol

"Oh Jesus Chr.., FENTON!"

14/04/13 12:07:30

They cried till the bitter end.

10/04/13 20:01:49

"hmmhhppfff hhmmpppffff!"

14/02/13 20:03:15

I think he's asking "Has it been pickled." --John Glover

Ron Jeremy in the XXX-Factor.

21/01/13 12:07:54

How to kill a mocking bird.

17/01/13 10:38:42

Some of the contestants at the Ursula Andress competition were a bit disappointing.

20/12/12 12:13:40

Dear miss Jones,

We are sorry to inform you that your son Tony has been killed in action by friendly fire.

He was a brave soldier and photographer.

15/12/12 9:52:00

HAH! If you think Photography is addictive, try Captioneering!

20/08/12 20:00:16

"I'm not itchy, I'm not itchy, I'm not itchy, I'm not itchy."

16/08/12 12:04:08

Zebradley Wiggins.

24/07/12 11:14:52

Chris unleashes Dupe Detector 3.0

14/05/12 20:34:08

"So I killed the angel, what now"?

11/05/12 16:45:20

Justin Bieber has bought a car.

14/04/12 20:05:50

"And Stay Out!"

03/04/12 21:01:55

Cabweazle.

01/04/12 20:38:07

Fenton! Oh Jesus Chr.., FENTON!

24/01/12 14:54:54

...and very..very slowly I moved my head to the left...I turned my head very inconspicuously in it's direction...and "WACK" I grabbed the bastard with my tongue and swallowed it whole!

22/11/11 20:25:44

Mahogranny

06/09/11 11:31:20

Practical exam "suicide bombing" for al Qaeda terrorists

16/06/11 13:26:11

Poop festival

16/05/17 19:08:08

Robokindergartencop.

18/03/16 9:30:12

Fathers for justice. --[anon]

Shedrolet

11/03/16 9:18:02

Trojan Hors d'oeuvres.

20/08/14 20:42:51

creative

"Ok Ok, we'll go to Disney-Land!!"

23/06/14 12:13:40

This picture is so old it's Browning.

14/11/13 9:02:29

The moment Peter saw the light..

12/09/13 20:12:22

24/06/13 8:02:53

16/06/13 16:04:06

01/05/13 20:02:26

25/04/13 15:39:26

24/04/13 20:08:22

24/03/13 12:45:14

06/03/13 12:00:07

"It's called Shampoo sir."

02/03/13 23:10:15

"Of course it takes time to heal, but it certainly annihilated every tapeworm in the system."

12/02/13 20:20:58

"Mum, why do we always go to that German hairdresser?"

11/02/13 8:16:20

Dad had his own ideas about teaching the kids that traffic could be dangerous.

03/01/13 20:11:04

The Nutcracker Suite.

11/12/12 12:00:09

"I think I've invented a new silly walk and would like to apply for a funding to develop it sir."

30/11/12 13:24:45

Holiday on Beerbados.

25/11/12 8:12:19

"Yes this is the one, he'll make a great Pi�ata."

16/08/12 22:29:44

"We're gonna need a bigger toad".

26/06/12 11:20:17

Cat vs Cat™

19/06/12 17:17:38

Siamese Twins see the doctor about constipation.

30/05/12 20:17:43

George was a real Cheapskate.

24/05/12 11:06:31

A Face in the Cloud.

25/04/12 20:00:11

"In the Bling Of An Eye"

02/04/12 20:03:25

"You forgot your lunchbox honey, here catch."

25/02/12 11:33:25

♪ It's a small girl after fall ♪

11/02/12 2:17:14

Big Bad Wolf gave her exactly a 30 seconds head start.

10/02/12 11:14:03

"..and don't forget the tampons dear".

11/01/12 20:00:16

all available on the Nintentoe DS.

17/12/11 22:24:21

Grassy Noel.

13/12/11 11:34:20

Salt Lake Kitty

11/10/11 11:03:57

"Good things come to those who stay"

08/08/11 13:03:37

This little piggy went to the black market.

07/08/11 11:52:08

Unheimlich Manoeuvre

13/10/14 12:35:11

♫ Your sofa away from me, your sofa I just can't see. ♫

25/09/14 20:08:14

When Blackbeard got wind of what the clerks had done with his loot he all made them 'Walk the Bank'.

14/09/14 20:52:37

Stainlesssaurus.

01/04/14 20:29:00

"Not now K2!"

24/02/14 20:09:05

Pistolaroid.

14/11/13 9:03:56

"Sand...I need sand...please help me...sand!"

07/11/13 12:39:40

"Shirley you can't be Syrious?"

11/09/13 20:00:21

Ok girls, get out your 80's shoulder pads.

18/08/13 12:23:06

Stepping Stonehenge.

09/05/13 20:00:10

Squeeze the Day.

10/04/13 20:02:54

"Damn, she took the apple Again..EVE!"

27/03/13 16:39:59

"Hey you, hey, Yeah you! Would you be so kind to throw those jeans behind these bushes?"

26/03/13 20:00:15

Santa Claustrophobia.

14/03/13 12:26:12

"So how are the kids Mr. Jones?"
-"Argh grah grag argh."

09/03/13 12:29:33

Salt Lake Cacti.

23/02/13 12:00:39

Tweedledum & Tweedledumber.

20/02/13 20:00:13

"Let me give you a cluecumber.."

14/02/13 20:02:43

"Honey, are you telling me that all that shit they originally told me about where babies come from is true?!"

06/02/13 20:16:52

"Dad, where do babies come from?""Well son, when a mummy and daddy love each other very much, one day the stork flies to their house and delivers a baby.""Oh. So who fucks the stork, dad?"(old joke) --Paul Woolley