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British police are hoping to have him extradited across the pond.
29/11/19 12:10:17
Soldiers have been dispatched to wipe out an Alien invasion
24/11/19 12:05:28
"Ok, now you'll just feel a little scratch"
05/11/19 8:11:52
North Pole dancer
03/11/19 8:05:37
It scared the shit out of me.
31/10/19 12:41:56
Pete hadn't just beaten anorexia. He'd pummeled it to death.
26/10/19 18:45:28
Gardening club in Chernobyl
23/10/19 7:37:49
Princess Margarets tiara comes up for auction.
22/10/19 7:06:02
20,000 Leaks Under the Sea
20/10/19 7:25:39
Duplicat
06/10/19 11:53:57
Gym'll fix it
05/10/19 8:33:02
Young people don't respect their elders anymore.
27/09/19 8:19:02
Trading standards has warned a lot of these cans will be fake.
21/09/19 7:05:45
"Yes they were expensive but they are very rare"
16/09/19 19:02:57
Oh no, not more Johnson supporters.
10/09/19 19:00:16
Alpacalips Now
09/09/19 19:00:07
It's humiliating when your mum still insists on stitching name labels to your clothes.
07/09/19 7:46:46
You could end up with a Nazi injury.
06/09/19 7:01:13
Madame Tussauds reveal waxwork commissioned by The White House. So far it has successfully attended 2 summits, 1 state occasion and a banquet without saying anything stupid.
30/08/19 9:57:08
It was the Gillette condoms which gave me serious grief.
28/08/19 11:04:49
cygnet ring
25/08/19 7:00:06
Cedar's Digest
24/08/19 7:10:16
"Good evening Tom, how are you?""Oh, don't get me started, I woke up this morning and they were already in a mood, something to do with the sofa being ripped to shreds. Then they ran out of Gourmet Mon Petit, so I had to have Lidl own brand food, then they went to work and turned the TV off, so I've been bored all day. They don't even check the litter tray until Saturday, so I have to do gymnastics to avoid my own poo, it must be nice to have a flushing toilet. Oh, and the dog has terrible wind at the moment. Same again please"
22/08/19 8:00:42
"Mmmmm, Chinese, Indian, Italian...I just love these 'all you can eat' buffets"
17/08/19 11:06:13
Die Hard.
15/08/19 19:16:33
''I hope the motel is very successful.'' - Well wisher.
12/08/19 7:21:00
Sale of the Sensory.
08/08/19 7:06:32
"Ooh, you gave me a start!"
03/08/19 14:14:12
No ewe turns
24/07/19 7:22:32
Spot marks the x
23/07/19 19:00:14
Blazing Saddles
16/07/19 11:00:04
Sunday Warship.
12/07/19 7:10:14
"Let us give tanks to the Lord."
12/07/19 7:00:06
Recycling Centre
10/07/19 19:00:04
High urners
10/07/19 7:09:18
Hairy Krishna
09/07/19 19:00:06
"Note to self: remember to tell Mrs Dawson not to move the furniture around when I'm returning from my time travel experiments."
08/07/19 19:14:47
Tinder Surprise
03/07/19 19:00:06
Close-knit family
02/07/19 22:19:16
For once Vlad is not the impaler
22/06/19 11:00:06
So how exactly did you lose your baseball cap up there again?
22/06/19 8:02:48
U crane?...no me Russian
21/06/19 7:00:51
Charlie and the Novichocolate Factory
20/06/19 7:00:07
My girlfriend's not interested insects.
14/06/19 7:03:09
Gnatalie
14/06/19 7:01:30
I see Santa's back
13/06/19 19:28:34
AC/JC
10/06/19 11:00:27
Julie was beginning to regret buying her bras from Amazon.
04/06/19 21:19:52
"Davy Crockett will never find me in here"
03/06/19 7:21:48
"Does my butt look big in this?"
01/06/19 19:46:52
Naturally, there was a huge mix-up when Mr. Jackson had said there'd been a kid napping at school.
22/05/19 19:04:13
Ooh I can see all her privet parts
22/05/19 11:13:26
An officer on a gentleman
21/05/19 8:25:57
Disorient Express
16/05/19 19:14:58
"Well sir after struggling for years, I've finally decided that I need an eye test.""You're not wrong there madam, this is the butchers."
14/05/19 19:56:24
Drowning street
14/05/19 7:16:41
That look when you spot your wife with another man and you can't do anything about it because you're a statue.
09/05/19 19:28:46
Jesus figured selling selfies on ebay would make him a prophet.
07/05/19 11:02:50
🎵 Four blind mice
03/05/19 11:02:24
8 out of 10 bat's prefer whiskers.
01/05/19 20:01:22
"Next stop, Vauxhall"
30/04/19 11:50:42
The whiting's on the wall
13/04/19 11:00:05
I know the name but I don't recognize their faeces
07/04/19 19:13:06
''You've done watt?''
02/04/19 22:08:28
"This food's a bit too rich for me."
24/03/19 12:10:12
Darling, could you just put the landing light on?
22/03/19 20:04:26
Don't mock big-breasted women. They need all the support they can get.
19/03/19 20:00:29
The Barber of Seville
19/03/19 8:00:06
"I can read the top five lines ok, then it starts to get fuzzy"
28/02/19 8:00:08
The local watering hole
27/02/19 23:09:20
Indesit exposure
24/02/19 20:00:18
Beryl was disappointed when Norman finally sent her the picture of him with his cock, hanging out.
17/02/19 8:50:06
I used to buy that for my old flame.
15/02/19 8:04:42
The Batmobile
07/02/19 20:00:05
Dasher cam.
31/01/19 20:00:13
"There, the engine's purring nicely now..."
27/01/19 20:00:17
Someone's been on a chopping spree.
25/01/19 20:07:01
Bone Voyage
25/01/19 8:24:10
Behind The Times
16/01/19 20:00:18
"There's no way I'm kissing his ring."
12/01/19 20:31:12
Boardwalk
12/01/19 12:00:04
I know you are busy but it's just a quick survey.
11/01/19 8:24:28
With the website down I ventured outside, it's not for me.
05/01/19 16:15:37
"I'd like to see him polish that off."
31/12/18 20:02:34
Reliant Dobbin
29/12/18 8:53:39
A Fish Called Wonga
28/12/18 12:00:14
"I'm dilated to make your acquaintance..."
26/12/18 12:08:31
Cheap, good head and goes down easy.
03/12/18 9:36:29
Global warming - It turns out the butler did it.
19/11/18 12:00:10
Trouble Brewing.
18/11/18 9:01:52
John Leannon
11/11/18 12:12:20
Auntie establishment
06/11/18 8:45:15
In the year 2050, the local takeaway proudly announces that it hasn't put its prices up since 2018.
22/10/18 12:03:09
"There's a faulty gene in my family. Most of the women are carriers."
15/10/18 7:01:59
Don't you just hate it when things from Amazon are left outside?
13/10/18 8:11:35
Further tests reveal smoking definitely stunts growth
11/10/18 7:00:50
Baking Bad
06/10/18 9:30:13
"Hello hello hello Kitty"
05/10/18 7:00:07
Hooligran.
02/10/18 8:18:44
Wow, trick or treat has changed since I was a kid.
26/09/18 0:07:47
clever 
