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Molly R		"Go on, send Boris another text - he falls for it every time!" 25/04/21 8:09:34	1 14

Troompa Loompa		These soldiers were unable to dodge the draft. 24/04/21 20:11:22	14

Ian Skelding		clever "Hey, kids, have you seen my diamond ring? it was by the fairy liquid on the kitchen window sill." 23/04/21 7:30:21	14

Vanessa the Guesser		Rock 'n' roll 21/04/21 19:00:07	1 14
The Rock and Roll Hall of Flame-broiled burgers. --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		creative As Chester zoo reopens, staff discover a giraffe has penetrated the bearded dragon enclosure with amazing results. 18/04/21 7:04:11	14

Hercules Rockefeller		lol "Do you think this corsage is a bit much?" 16/04/21 11:19:31	14

Stephen Bean		"Excuse me love, can you move please? Doctor Who can't get out of his tardis." 11/04/21 7:31:26	14

Tony S		Hello Mr Wolf can you tell the 3rd little pig we are going to be late with his delivery 09/04/21 7:10:58	14

Tony Edwards		It was designed by Jean Paul Goatier. 31/03/21 19:45:26	1 14
Are you sure it wasn't Bill BLAAAAAAAASS? --Scrijjy Doo
Troompa Loompa		8 out of 10 cats prefer whiskies. 28/03/21 11:07:04	1 14
Disbabling the search function doesn't really help.. ;-) --Guideaux .
Mr Dome		No honey I definitely ordered a leotard 26/03/21 22:20:05	14

Vivvy En		lol "Stop moaning, Dave, I carried her for 9 months. It's only another mile or so." 18/03/21 12:07:39	14

Al Overy		clever Narcoleptics: never pass out in the drawing room. 11/03/21 15:09:39	14

Dave Bryan		lol ''I've got to go now. It's time for the midday caption.'' 09/03/21 12:18:56	1 14
He really doesn't know whether he's coming or going. --Willie Johnson
James Lennox		"We're not wearing anything Dave, but if you're shy come in your shorts." "I have." 09/03/21 12:00:39	14

Vanessa the Guesser		lol May the force pee with you. 09/03/21 8:00:12	1 14
Shields Up! --SnapDragon D
Ellen Duncalf		Yep. They've cleared off. Time to have some fun with the goldfish. 28/02/21 13:55:37	14

stone face		"I wouldn't mind a pair like that." "Oh come off it Ermintrude! You'd look ridiculous in flip flops." 27/02/21 8:38:45	1 14
Flip flops? They look more like spaniel's ears. --Mauris Iocus
Stephen Bean		Has someone warned her about attracting the wrong sort of fellers? 26/02/21 20:00:39	1 14
like termites? --Mauris Iocus
Vanessa the Guesser		Looks highly strung to me. 26/02/21 13:02:42	1 14

Endeavour 2 Persevere		Miss Bee Haven 24/02/21 8:17:22	14

James Lennox		Fortunately the North Korean nuclear threat wasn't all it had been cracked up to be. 22/02/21 8:22:01	14

Ian Skelding		lol "Hi darling, I'm going to be home late, a plane's just landed on the Motorway." "For God's sake Steve, just say you're in the pub." 20/02/21 20:27:02	1 14
"I am in the pub but I haven't started drinking yet." --Willie Johnson
Vanessa the Guesser		lol "Get a broom!" 15/02/21 8:04:59	2 14
Get a ROOMba!" --Mauris Iocus
stone face		"For fucks sake Tiger! Just take a drop shot." 11/02/21 8:09:29	14

Tony S		creative clever That's my last drop off Noah you will have to send someone else back to pick up the Dodos 10/02/21 20:22:57	14

Stu Dent		Don't look back in hunger 10/02/21 12:00:07	1 14
If eyes could eat, that would be gone by now. --Willie Johnson
Stephen Bean		lol Cocks and robbers 08/02/21 12:00:05	14

The Wolf		"Reverend Smith, sorry to bother you on your lunch break, there's a lady waiting to see you in the vestry" 05/02/21 12:00:11	1 14
How convenient, (although I was preparing for the choirboy auditions), I'm wearing the new bishopric approved vestments. --Mauris Iocus
Stephen Bean		"I see bread people." 04/02/21 8:00:20	14

Stu Dent		Charlie's Angels 03/02/21 20:02:17	14

Al Overy		Foolout 29/01/21 12:02:40	14

Fozzgog B.		Captioning while driving - so not worth Â£50 28/01/21 21:27:40	14

James Lennox		lol Dave loved riding lightning rods during hurricanes. He did it well. We'll miss you Dave. 14/01/21 8:07:10	2 14
Please change it back. I thought "We'll miss you Dave" was punchier, but you decide. --Glyn Evans
Stu Dent		The fit controller 12/01/21 20:24:08	14

C CaMel		"I get it washed then some unicorn shits all over it!" 11/01/21 9:04:20	14

Stu Dent		Your Ferrero Rocher Mr Gulliver 06/01/21 20:07:12	14

Dan Nicholls		Everyone wanted to say something about Martin's background during the group call, but no one was brave enough to address the elephant in the Zoom. 31/12/20 8:47:17	14

Stu Dent		The only mother in the UK who was hoping for stricter lockdown regulations. 20/12/20 12:09:43	1 14
"strictier"? You mean I've been spelling it wrong all these years? --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		clever LGBTQUEUE 20/12/20 12:06:25	14

Vivvy En		'Hmmm, got the leotard sorted. Now to choose a workout DVD...' 15/12/20 8:49:44	2 14
Whichever one looks tastiest --Mr Dome
Al Overy		Mini hands make light work. 12/12/20 8:00:35	14

Dave Bryan		clever ''Go to work on an egg.'' 30/11/20 12:02:10	14

Chris Keegan		'Working from home hasn't affected me at all' Said Michael Jones, Director of Lloyds Bank. 25/11/20 8:36:44	14

Stephen Bean		When wasps start being attracted to your toilet seat, it's time to get tested for diabetes. 24/11/20 12:21:38	14

The Wolf		lol The local Dungeons and Dragons club finally pluck up the courage to Google the word 'tits'... 12/11/20 12:00:15	2 14
And see a pic of themselves --Mr Dome
Dave Bryan		''I'm so grateful you managed to unblock the sink.'' 09/11/20 20:15:27	14

James Lennox		It's a wonder of nature how sunflowers always turn to face the camera. 08/11/20 20:09:23	14

The Wolf		That awkward moment when you're trying to appreciate the Mona Lisa, then your friend's black labrador starts licking your ear hole. 05/11/20 8:30:36	15 14
To be fair, why does a caption have to be about the Mona Lisa? She is not the only subject in the photo. Who really cares what aspect of the picture is taken as long as it is part of the photo and provides us with some humour? Lots of the best cap... --Mr Dome
Chris Keegan		clever Mike detects earth tremors pretty much everywhere he goes. 03/11/20 12:00:33	14

Lucky Elperro		lol x2 "Normal people will see the outline of a vase in this picture, but the bedwetters will see two sheep". 02/11/20 15:54:10	14

Scrijjy Doo		lol x2 clever The Dying Scotsman 01/11/20 13:20:19	14

Al Overy		lol When you forget to put the bins out, hear the dust lorry outside and just try to move them by telekinesis instead. 30/10/20 21:40:12	14

Chris Keegan		"I tried that new barbers down the road yesterday" - "Yeah, me too Dave" 30/10/20 12:04:33	14

Chris Keegan		lol In a moment of magnificent inspiration Kevin and Julie saved themselves thirty quid for a babysitter and went out. 27/10/20 8:00:41	1 14
The lights are on but nobody's home. --Willie Johnson
Vanessa the Guesser		After a long match, play went to sudden death. 26/10/20 20:01:02	14

Chris Keegan		Tom and Dave think it's bloody hilarious nobody can go out clubbing anymore! 26/10/20 12:00:08	14

The Wolf		lol How your cat would react if for some reason a fat strange man forced his way down your chimney... 24/10/20 7:21:09	1 14
Sorry for not voting Wolfie, I forgot I had 1 hour less to vote for this caption. You had me in stitches. --Stephen Bean
Al Overy		"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, you'll be a Mannequin, my son!" 17/10/20 11:00:21	14

Mark England		clever "Quick, call the Peelers" 13/10/20 19:02:59	14

The Wolf		"Jane, when you said you had an affair whilst working at Monkey World, I presumed you meant with a member of staff" 13/10/20 7:00:24	14

Tony Edwards		It makes a change from watching repeats of Porridge. 08/10/20 11:23:56	14

Dave Bryan		lol ''Don't come running to me, if you fall off.'' 04/10/20 19:35:59	14

Dot Old		Dear Mr Beach cc Captioneers I'm just writing to te you how much I enjoy your website, caption.me. I find it very entertaining and it rea y makes me augh. I don't write very often as it takes me so b oody ong on this typewriter. I'm saving up for a new one. We , have a nice day. Yours sincere y anon 04/10/20 7:20:51	4 14
"I didn't know he was called Mr Bleach" He is white isn't he? --Willie Johnson
Eugene Quill		It's Stor-a-Mog, the exciting new cat storage unit! (Model shown is for illustration purposes only. Cats not supplied). 02/10/20 19:54:51	14

Ian Skelding		lol "Now put your right foot in." "Don't think I'm brave enough." "My right leg needs oiling." "Which one's my right?" 30/09/20 8:39:49	14

James Lennox		"Honey, remember how 9 months ago I told you I was abducted by aliens..." 29/09/20 7:03:18	14

Crunchy Chords
	27/09/20 7:01:14		14

Tony Edwards		clever U and I 22/09/20 11:41:35	14

Chris Keegan		They had a boy. Greyam. 22/09/20 11:01:56	14

Dave Bryan		''Darling, when I said you could do with an extra few inches......'' 22/09/20 7:25:40	14

The Wolf		lol "Are you ok out there Dad? Sorry, I know it's freezing but we don't have a choice with social distancing. Anyway, where do you keep your biscuits?" 18/09/20 19:00:41	14

Al Overy		Ruff sketch 18/09/20 11:03:05	14

Stephen Bean		clever 🎵 Never store your superglue next to your eye drops 🎵 17/09/20 11:00:07	1 14
That will make you sing the glues. --Willie Johnson
Al Overy		Inkongnito 16/09/20 11:17:08	14

The Wolf		creative "I actually had a sex change after we had kids and I can tell you, it's not easy being a trans parent" 16/09/20 7:16:16	14

alexandra ball		New ladybird edition the joy of sex 15/09/20 19:12:12	1 14

Al Overy		"Give us a really big wave!" 10/09/20 7:04:41	14

Al Overy		Spitting image 05/09/20 7:00:06	14

Tony Edwards		Early gurning centre 04/09/20 19:16:17	14

Vanessa the Guesser		"A large shuttlecock has landed in the garden!" "I thought I heard a racquet." 26/08/20 7:07:56	14

Dave Bryan		clever ''It's stopped raining, darling. Let's get out of here.'' 24/08/20 20:35:28	14

James Lennox		When your remote falls down the back of the pouch. 24/08/20 11:05:55	1 14

Rachel P		A man for all seasons 23/08/20 19:00:15	14

Al Overy		"No nick-a la sturgeon!" 23/08/20 11:00:12	2 14
That's so bad I had to vote for it. --Dave Bryan
Karen Oakenfull		That's so fake. You can see the thin wires holding the spider up! Duh. 22/08/20 7:50:44	14

Ian Skelding		Tom later moved onto bigger furniture but unfortunately suffered from a slipped desk." 21/08/20 7:40:45	14

Mark Wilson		7,8,9,10 ... Coming ready or not 18/08/20 12:10:48	14

Karen Oakenfull		"Darling, can you smell ga....." 18/08/20 7:01:34	14

Ian Skelding		Hanker Chief 15/08/20 19:08:34	14

Neil Mackenzie		Where's the poop deck? 11/08/20 19:23:30	14

Ian Skelding		clever "Of course it's safe, President Trump sanctioned it." 10/08/20 19:41:14	14

Lucky Elperro		lol "This'll teach the bstrds for leaving me in Tesco's car park with the windows up." 08/08/20 20:38:38	1 14
There there, no need to get all hot under the collar. --Willie Johnson
Mark Wilson		lol " It's me, open the door" 06/08/20 8:49:41	14

Stu Dent		lol A Doc Holiday Inn 03/08/20 11:13:54	14

alexandra ball		He's screwed now, the combination is their wedding anniversary. 29/07/20 13:08:21	14

Vanessa the Guesser		lol "We've always dreamed of having a large family." 26/07/20 7:34:08	14

stone face		lol Things were going great at the Jason And The Argonauts reuninon party. 22/07/20 7:03:16	2 14
Great caption and I hate to be 'that guy', but there's a typo in 'reunion' --Michael Winner
Stephen Bean		clever 6th form college prepares for visit from Prince Andrew. 20/07/20 19:05:12	14

Mark Wilson		lol " We're behind schedule, you'll have to carry on working through your lunch" 18/07/20 11:14:45	14

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