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ICU
25/07/20 11:02:49
She scrubs up well.
25/07/20 11:01:16
Brothels open up again, but you'll need more than a condom.
25/07/20 12:33:54
PeepPE
25/07/20 11:00:05
The service at my local sperm donor clinic is bloody fantastic...
25/07/20 11:08:07
''I've got some bad news for you, Mr Johnson.''''You mean I'm cured.''
25/07/20 11:17:55
"Just a little prick Mr Jones.""Not anymore it isn't."
25/07/20 11:27:35
“Nurse, I think you got the wrong end of the stick when I said the patients need transparency.”
25/07/20 13:30:46
''I'm H.A.P.P.Y, I'm H.A.P.P.Y........''
25/07/20 11:10:06
Dave was eager to participate in 'clap for carers', but he struggled to clap with one hand.
25/07/20 11:02:58
Theater of Dreams
25/07/20 11:58:28
"I was sure he was dead".
25/07/20 11:53:15
50 Shades of Grey's Anatomy
25/07/20 11:08:54
Thank you NHS
25/07/20 11:01:44
"COVID19? No, I'm not bothered about that. But I have to shave that old man's balls before surgery and I'm not taking any chances"
25/07/20 11:01:19
''I told you private health insurance was worth it.''
25/07/20 11:01:05
"Sorry I'm late. I just got out of the shower."
25/07/20 15:08:46
Dave wished he hadn't picked today to start cross dressing.
25/07/20 11:34:38
"Grandad, I'm only going to ask one more time, where did you put the nurses clothes?"
25/07/20 11:11:31
Shameless!, Good job she's her face covered, that bra and those pants don't match,
25/07/20 11:02:35
The advantage of changing to uniforms from a alternative supplier were completely transparent.
26/07/20 10:33:04
A flash and the bedpan
25/07/20 11:53:55
Twisted Sister
25/07/20 11:49:00
''I'm not on duty at the moment, Mr Jones. That's why I'm out of uniform.''
25/07/20 11:45:05
A room with a view
25/07/20 11:43:34
''My urinal bottle is full, nurse.''''I'm not surprised. It's supposed to be for urine only.''
25/07/20 11:28:21
Russia, where the medical care will probably kill you, but you'll go out smiling.
25/07/20 11:07:41
"It's either your last speck of human decency, Mr Cummings, or a fly turd."
25/07/20 11:05:41
"Ooh Matron!"
25/07/20 11:02:56
Carry On Covid
25/07/20 11:02:28
"Your Covid-19 test is negative Mr. Epstein, for the 142nd time."
25/07/20 11:01:18
"Before I give you your medication, I think we ought to check your blood pressure."
25/07/20 11:00:22
"It's your catheter Mr Granger, and no, an erection doesn't make it easier to fit."
25/07/20 12:10:33
Two pensioners in local hospital have a stroke, But one unfortunate wasn't close enough
25/07/20 11:55:27
"Nurse Grace, is this the week you should have been on holiday by any chance"
25/07/20 11:41:42
The Covid virus is not the only one that seems to be 'doing the rounds' at the moment.
25/07/20 11:36:13
Nurse Goodbody is well-known for her bedside manner.
25/07/20 11:29:37
"Mr Jenkins, I have just the tonic for you""It's working already, Nurse"
25/07/20 11:22:02
Things perk up on the Covid ward when one of the patients gets hold of a pair of X-ray specs.
25/07/20 11:16:36
Looks like old Mr. Braun has been tampering with the X-Ray machine again.
25/07/20 11:13:07
Peep-PE
17/08/20 17:25:19
The NHS showed their appriciation to Captain Tom Moore in their own way.
26/07/20 10:31:49
"Why did Superman go to the hospital?..."
26/07/20 1:44:16
Shag, marry, avoid cos she's infected
25/07/20 22:47:39
Covid19 new symptom X-ray vision, if you look at this fully clothed nurse but see her underwear book a test immediately.
25/07/20 18:50:39
"Shhh...the PPE is disposable one use only, but we've told her its washable to boost patient morale"
25/07/20 18:38:47
"Is this the patient who is complaining about cataracts?"
25/07/20 16:59:45
"His reactions are just fine. See if you can get someone to wipe that ceiling".
25/07/20 13:11:35
"They say cutbacks won't affect the NHS, hmmm...now how long will it take to brush Mr Tomlinson's teeth with this?"
25/07/20 12:47:17
Alex isn't with BUPA, he's hard up.
25/07/20 12:29:54
I'm in A&E, turn round so I can see the R&S.
25/07/20 12:29:42
Outside the ward was an orderly queue.
25/07/20 11:55:04
Health minister reveals possible cause of covid 19 hot spot.
25/07/20 11:51:24
Dr. Quim, Medicine Woman
25/07/20 11:29:10
Dominic Cummings is admitted to a special clinic to test his eyesight.
25/07/20 11:25:26
Bert had recently had a stroke.
25/07/20 11:22:55
Goggle box
25/07/20 11:22:21
''If you stand outside with me at 8.00pm, I'll give you the clap.''
25/07/20 11:21:34
He also has a button that makes her come quickly.
25/07/20 11:19:15
A lot of pain noises were heard from the Circumcision ward.
25/07/20 11:17:52
"Mr Grimes is that a snake on your bed or are you just pleased to see me""No really in bed 1 the strippers dropped her snake"
25/07/20 11:14:04
"Dr Woo-hoo Cumtodaddy I presume, my father talks about you a lot "
25/07/20 11:11:32
"I've seen your CT scan Mr Fairbanks and I'd stop doing that if I were you."
25/07/20 11:06:56