clever

ICU

25/07/20 11:02:49

clever

She scrubs up well.

25/07/20 11:01:16

lol

Brothels open up again, but you'll need more than a condom.

25/07/20 12:33:54

PeepPE

25/07/20 11:00:05

The service at my local sperm donor clinic is bloody fantastic...

25/07/20 11:08:07

''I've got some bad news for you, Mr Johnson.''

''You mean I'm cured.''

25/07/20 11:17:55

"Just a little prick Mr Jones."
"Not anymore it isn't."

25/07/20 11:27:35

“Nurse, I think you got the wrong end of the stick when I said the patients need transparency.”

25/07/20 13:30:46

''I'm H.A.P.P.Y, I'm H.A.P.P.Y........''

25/07/20 11:10:06

Dave was eager to participate in 'clap for carers', but he struggled to clap with one hand.

25/07/20 11:02:58

Theater of Dreams

25/07/20 11:58:28

"I was sure he was dead".

25/07/20 11:53:15

50 Shades of Grey's Anatomy

25/07/20 11:08:54

Thank you NHS

25/07/20 11:01:44

"COVID19? No, I'm not bothered about that. But I have to shave that old man's balls before surgery and I'm not taking any chances"

25/07/20 11:01:19

''I told you private health insurance was worth it.''

25/07/20 11:01:05

"Sorry I'm late. I just got out of the shower."

25/07/20 15:08:46

Dave wished he hadn't picked today to start cross dressing.

25/07/20 11:34:38

"Grandad, I'm only going to ask one more time, where did you put the nurses clothes?"

25/07/20 11:11:31

Shameless!, Good job she's her face covered, that bra and those pants don't match,

25/07/20 11:02:35

The advantage of changing to uniforms from a alternative supplier were completely transparent.

26/07/20 10:33:04

A flash and the bedpan

25/07/20 11:53:55

Twisted Sister

25/07/20 11:49:00

''I'm not on duty at the moment, Mr Jones. That's why I'm out of uniform.''

25/07/20 11:45:05

A room with a view

25/07/20 11:43:34

''My urinal bottle is full, nurse.''

''I'm not surprised. It's supposed to be for urine only.''

25/07/20 11:28:21

Russia, where the medical care will probably kill you, but you'll go out smiling.

25/07/20 11:07:41

"It's either your last speck of human decency, Mr Cummings, or a fly turd."

25/07/20 11:05:41

"Ooh Matron!"

25/07/20 11:02:56

Carry On Covid

25/07/20 11:02:28

"Your Covid-19 test is negative Mr. Epstein, for the 142nd time."

25/07/20 11:01:18

"Before I give you your medication, I think we ought to check your blood pressure."

25/07/20 11:00:22

"It's your catheter Mr Granger, and no, an erection doesn't make it easier to fit."

25/07/20 12:10:33

Two pensioners in local hospital have a stroke, But one unfortunate wasn't close enough

25/07/20 11:55:27

"Nurse Grace, is this the week you should have been on holiday by any chance"

25/07/20 11:41:42

The Covid virus is not the only one that seems to be 'doing the rounds' at the moment.

25/07/20 11:36:13

Nurse Goodbody is well-known for her bedside manner.

25/07/20 11:29:37

"Mr Jenkins, I have just the tonic for you"
"It's working already, Nurse"

25/07/20 11:22:02

Things perk up on the Covid ward when one of the patients gets hold of a pair of X-ray specs.

25/07/20 11:16:36

Looks like old Mr. Braun has been tampering with the X-Ray machine again.

25/07/20 11:13:07

Peep-PE

17/08/20 17:25:19

The NHS showed their appriciation to Captain Tom Moore in their own way.

26/07/20 10:31:49

"Why did Superman go to the hospital?..."

26/07/20 1:44:16

Shag, marry, avoid cos she's infected

25/07/20 22:47:39

Covid19 new symptom X-ray vision, if you look at this fully clothed nurse but see her underwear book a test immediately.

25/07/20 18:50:39

"Shhh...the PPE is disposable one use only, but we've told her its washable to boost
patient morale"

25/07/20 18:38:47

"Is this the patient who is complaining about cataracts?"

25/07/20 16:59:45

"His reactions are just fine. See if you can get someone to wipe that ceiling".

25/07/20 13:11:35

"They say cutbacks won't affect the NHS, hmmm...now how long will it take to brush Mr Tomlinson's teeth with this?"

25/07/20 12:47:17

Alex isn't with BUPA, he's hard up.

25/07/20 12:29:54

I'm in A&E, turn round so I can see the R&S.

25/07/20 12:29:42

Outside the ward was an orderly queue.

25/07/20 11:55:04

Health minister reveals possible cause of covid 19 hot spot.

25/07/20 11:51:24

Dr. Quim, Medicine Woman

25/07/20 11:29:10

Dominic Cummings is admitted to a special clinic to test his eyesight.

25/07/20 11:25:26

Bert had recently had a stroke.

25/07/20 11:22:55

Goggle box

25/07/20 11:22:21

''If you stand outside with me at 8.00pm, I'll give you the clap.''

25/07/20 11:21:34

He also has a button that makes her come quickly.

25/07/20 11:19:15

A lot of pain noises were heard from the Circumcision ward.

25/07/20 11:17:52

"Mr Grimes is that a snake on your bed or are you just pleased to see me"

"No really in bed 1 the strippers dropped her snake"

25/07/20 11:14:04

"Dr Woo-hoo Cumtodaddy I presume, my father talks about you a lot "

25/07/20 11:11:32

"I've seen your CT scan Mr Fairbanks and I'd stop doing that if I were you."

25/07/20 11:06:56