Sending private messages on this site is currently disabled due to abuse by spammers.

Please use the forum to send private messages instead.

	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	33		1	#1	7	8	#28	3103	3350	#53
Photos								60	241	#10
Comments	10	2			2			239	248	#34
Forum Posts		1						1
Suggested Edits	2							1	3	#11

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions			124	#1	13506	#17
Photos					758	#25
Comments					372	#22
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits					5	#9

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	More bones discovered in a car park. Believed to be the remains of Richard King, who disappeared in 1990 after complaining to the contractors that the tarmac behind his shop wasn’t level. 01/10/23 23:24:25, edited: 02/10/23 3:02:12, suggested edits	1 3

	When dad can’t be bothered with potty training. 16/09/23 1:18:33	3

	Traffic Warden’s in some parts of the world, have their own methods of sorting illegal parking. 05/08/23 8:03:49	3

	I love Catonese food. 02/08/23 6:09:23	3

	Every year, The town of Blarney in County Cork, Ireland, hosts, “The Most Unusual Pet” Competition. This is a photo taken in 1904 of Brendan Doherty who famously came 2nd in the very first competition, having lost out to Joseph O’Mally who won with a tin of salmon. 07/07/23 4:35:10	3

	Masked Bauball 14/05/23 20:00:28	3

	We rescued a cat that was born deaf, non vocal and clawless. People often wonder how he communicates to get what he wants. They also ask why we haven’t got any eyebrows. 09/04/23 8:12:08	3

	“Why don’t you believe me Maureen? I honestly thought it was tin foil.” 13/02/23 8:29:14	3

	“I told you Kenneth was a rubbish gangster.” 06/02/23 17:48:53	3

	Never threaten to give Liam a clip around the ear. He’ll get over-excited. 26/01/23 8:23:30, edited: 26/01/23 20:35:09	3

	“Don’t sniff the candles, I did once and now I’ve got a pink nose and stubble whiskers.” 25/01/23 12:56:00	3

	Skating On Ice-cream 16/01/23 12:13:54	3

	Four Bold, New Looks From Our Casual Pimp Range 03/01/23 20:02:31, edited: 03/01/23 20:09:06	3

	“Everything feels quite normal Mrs Smythe, but come back next week if your cough persists.” 22/12/22 8:26:37	3

	“I bet I can tell you your exact age, favourite colour and what your fortune has in store.” “How?” 22/12/22 8:20:43	3

	“I overslept.” replied Lizzo when asked why she was wearing a duvet. 10/12/22 13:47:38	3

	I can’t understand why anyone would want to get married in such a place. It beluga’s belief! 05/12/22 8:01:18	3

	“Steve your dinner’s ready!” 03/12/22 16:04:22	3

	“Just a bit of salad for me thanks.” 25/11/22 8:04:40	3

	“…and now through the car wash!” 13/11/22 20:30:58	3

	You know that feeling when you just don’t know where to start so you don’t? Well I’ve had that feeling for the last 4 years. 05/11/22 8:40:15	3

	As soon as this photo was aired on Unsolved Mysteries, Burt Kowalski, who went missing on Christmas Day 8 years ago, was recognised and found safe and well by police. He claims he ran away because he didn’t get any matching pyjamas and felt left out and unloved and no one seemed to care. He will only go back if his wife and family say sorry. He’s still waiting. 03/11/22 21:38:30, edited: 03/11/22 21:41:32	2 3
Burt as a member of your estranged family it's important to point out what people go through during any famine. They don't receive their crop, nobody helps them, they feel left out and unloved and that no one seems to care. They don... --Glyn Evans
	German Jenga 17/10/22 10:22:28	3

	Naturisks 15/10/22 12:23:25	3

	This isn’t just any smashed pumpkins….. This is Mark Spencer’s smashed pumpkins. 14/10/22 20:04:41	3

	To the right of the photo, is the man who should’ve forever held his peace. 05/09/22 20:03:25, edited: 05/09/22 20:05:46	3

	Coincidentally, if you follow that red cycle path it leads to A&E. Bonus! 03/09/22 20:17:17, edited: 03/09/22 20:18:31	3

	It took me 7 hours to paint this. He kept remarkably still. I didn’t realise he was dead until I took the helmet off. 16/08/22 12:46:57	3

	Thomas holds Mary tightly to stop her sliding off the bed. 14/05/22 12:08:51	3

	“Today.. I are be mostly trying to catch frogs.” 29/04/22 13:13:59	3

	“Hi, we’re your new neighbours.” 27/03/22 8:11:16	3

	“Right you two. We’ve been reported to the RSPCA regarding allegations of bestiality. They will be here any minute now so just act normal.” 01/02/22 22:41:00	3

	Never unclog the hair from your shower plug hole whilst on acid. (Nod to 20:13:13) 22/12/21 23:07:07	3

	Angela meets China’s new president for the first time. 07/10/21 12:09:34	3

	Photo of Derek treading barefoot on a rusty nail. Photo of Derek 2 weeks later, wishing he’d gone for that bloody tetanus injection. 16/09/21 12:49:13	3

	When you find out "˜Freddo's" have gone up AGAIN! 09/06/21 2:25:10	3

	"Why didn't you write exam answers on the inside of a chewing gum wrapper like the rest of us?" "Too obvious." "So you think cooking yourself a full English breakfast, an hour into the test, wouldn't raise any suspicion?" 21/05/21 21:20:10	3

	To meet each other at The Guinness Book Of World Records was fantastic for both of them. John even gave one of his shoes to Lee as a momento of the occasion, which he now uses as a fishing boat back in "˜nam. 18/04/21 13:25:55	3

	There's only one of these coins in existence. Thankfully. 03/04/21 9:44:50	3

	Derek hasn't laughed this much since his wife died. 22/03/21 11:38:05	3

	Head hunting 02/02/21 20:01:49	3

	Kim wonders if she'll ever get on top of the paperwork. 26/01/21 20:14:09	3

	"Okay so maybe they do look like 2 aspirins on an ironing board but don't get upset about it. I still quite fancy you." 20/01/21 20:18:22	3

	"Malcolm, I know we've recently won Euro millions, but I don't see why you have you have to show off so much with the recycling? Can't the wine bottles just go in the appropriately coloured bin?" 15/11/20 20:03:17	3

	The kids don't realise they are playing in a Moroccan cemetery. 11/09/20 15:41:08	3

	Tom was outraged when Mrs Tom told him the kittens weren't his. 08/09/20 14:28:51	3

	"Hank we've been sat here like this for over 17 hours." "I know. I reckon we should've just fed her to the pigs." 01/09/20 20:38:08	3

	"I've just done a head count love and 27 of them are not ours." 28/08/20 11:29:33	3

	"Oh God. Now we're for it. He's running back out with a bloody great fish under his arm." 25/08/20 8:26:59	3

	Ken spent 14 hours staring at the Magic Eye pictures before being told they weren't Magic Eye Pictures. 17/07/20 18:50:07	3

	Please Take A Leaflet To Find An Insomniac Support Group Near You 10/07/20 2:04:58	3

	"C'mon, let's not get in a stew over this." 25/06/20 23:23:50	3

	PG and The Tips 20/06/20 20:35:57	3

	Poor young Harrington-Smythe felt unloved and neglected by his parents, so he decided to run away from home and use his giant pet tortoise as transport. Two weeks later he was found 30 feet away trying to unlock the garden gate. 17/06/20 21:21:02	3

	Tonight on Domestic Abuse - Untold Stories...We meet Frank from Tennessee: "My wife of 35 years did this to me the day after we married and she made me stand next to her for hours while she was ironing so she had somewhere to hang my shirts, the linen and all her dresses..........until I shot her." 16/06/20 11:26:58	1 3
At last you plucked up a ring of confidence. --Morgan .
	The people at number 24 had only had their trampoline set up for a day, and already the neighbours were getting fed up of enthusiastic drunk people landing in their garden. Let alone the effort of throwing them back over the fence. 11/06/20 1:05:26	3

	Carbage 01/06/20 13:18:32	3

	When you're embarrassed giving family members a lift. 01/06/20 8:21:25	3

	Insane Bolt 19/05/20 2:36:06	3

	He was a rubbish chef 18/05/20 20:45:14	3

	Fish and small fries 14/05/20 11:28:04	3

	The very first AA meeting went down like the Titanic. 12/05/20 8:18:46	3

	As she continued to read aloud and approached chapter 348 of War And Peace, the dog stared over at the vets and longed to be put down. 09/05/20 17:05:45	3

	🎵 I believe I'm a fly... 🎵 18/04/20 22:30:00	3

	It won't get far on those legs. 16/04/20 15:50:59	3

	That time when a left over piece of melon decides to eat an annoying portion of colourful fruit that was gaining all the attention. 01/04/20 20:57:25	3

	"Hi honey, I've managed to tape the kids." "Great! Looking forward to watching it when I get home." 31/03/20 20:47:49	3

	clever "I need to powder my nose." 25/03/20 16:03:41	3

	The guests wished that Marcia would stop and just put a f*cking lid on it. 25/03/20 12:25:21	3

	#9 "Do you think this is a real ghost or a fake? Let us know in the comments section below. Don't forget to hit that subscribe button!" 21/03/20 12:23:11	1 3
I can't do that with this blanket on my head. Can't even find the subscribe button. --Willie Johnson
	They found her granddaughter down at the community centre playing bingo. 14/03/20 20:21:26	3

	Stress balls 14/03/20 8:07:11	3

	Cockney Knees-Ups May Suddenly Occur In This Area 08/03/20 22:26:40	3

	"I think it must have fell from the top of that building up there Dave." "I don't care where it came from, just help me pull this f*cking thing out of my eye!" 03/03/20 8:11:45	3

	Museum commemorates legendary Native American Indians. Famous last words: "Stage coach approaching." - Chief Big Cloud 12/09/19 13:44:12	4 3
In addition, Tonto put his ear to the ground in the middle of an empty plain and said 'Buffalo come', the Lone Ranger looked around and could see no buffalo anywhere and said 'How do you know??', to which Tonto replied 'Face sticky'' --Mr Dome
	....and when a genie appeared from the brass lamp I was polishing, I knew I was being set up by my mates, so when the genie granted me 3 wishes, I thought I'd play along. For my first wish, I asked for a million pounds. There was a puff of smoke and a million quid was piled up in front of me. Wow! This was the best prank ever. For my second wish, I asked for beautiful, sexy women to fancy me wherever I went. He clicked his fingers and suddenly I was surrounded by hot babes. I couldn't believe this was happening! He asked me for my final wish, (and I regret this now.) I said I wanted to be a green chair with real arms and legs...." 08/07/19 20:56:12	3

	A game of Russian Roulette ends in death by a bullet. A game of Russian Strip Poker ends in death by hypothermia. 25/06/19 20:11:06	3

	"Right you lot, now listen to me. Let he who has not sinned, cast the first...Ouch! Aarrgh! Oower! 27/04/19 20:31:34	3

	"Raymond, can I have my colander back you freak. I want a divorce." 23/04/19 13:13:21	3

	The Hits family discover their daughter Lodaa is dyslexic. 07/04/19 20:49:55	3

	Inaconda 23/03/19 21:24:15	3

	What's worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Err..... 17/03/19 23:24:49	3

	When I said put Daz in the washing machine, I meant the bloody powder! 24/02/19 20:00:47	3

	His colleague is a boom boy, but Pete is a dolly grip. 04/02/19 20:20:03	3

	The source: "˜Crater of kilauea' is Hawaiian for: "˜Contents from hoover bag'. 03/02/19 12:59:00	3

	Omg. So last year. 22/01/19 1:47:49	3

	I used to work in that shop. No one ever came in. 15/01/19 11:48:49	3

	Marley Davidson 13/01/19 20:01:46	3

	As soon as Hurricane Irma ended, the Virgin Islanders wasted no time in getting urgent provisions sent over to Richard Branson. 21/09/17 20:34:01	2 3

	"Did you just call me a Kent?" 09/08/16 8:04:16	3

	Understanding their plight, a passer-by gave them 2 tickets to see Jim Davidson's matinee show at The Empire down the road. 03/08/16 5:41:42	3

	David Blaine discovers his ancestry on this week's 'Who Do You Think You Are' 06/10/15 13:31:44	3

	Mel takes Feng Shui very seriously according to her concerned family and friends. 18/07/15 14:32:06	3

	After an embarrassing occurrence whilst opening out a sun lounger earlier, Sal came up with a way to ensure his swimming trunks wouldn't fall down again. 16/07/15 9:02:18	1 3
Thank you Boyce ;) I hadn't noticed duh. xxxx --Karen Oakenfull
	"Look if you don't believe me! This cheque came this morning from Readers Digest, I've won the jackpot!" 18/06/15 6:10:39	3

	"......No, you let go first." 28/05/15 7:50:56	3

	As professional as ever, the over 60's Clog 'n' Click Formation Team went ahead with the performance, hoping no one would notice they'd forgotten to bring the skipping ropes. 25/05/15 18:37:36	3

	That dog is an excellent ventriloquist. 22/05/15 14:41:44	3

	Eye Candy Crush 20/05/15 17:02:28	3

	Flying Without Wings 18/05/15 20:14:53	3

more captions

last comments (total: 122)

Thank you Al xxx

Karen Oakenfull

16/01/24
7:31pm

comment on caption:
There once lived a gardener from Leeds… Who swallowed a packet of seeds It was more fertile grass When it came out his arse It also choked most of the weeds [Karen Oakenfull]

Love this theme, Cap Auth, but wonder if a more specific story might get more votes. I've offered one but feel free to reject, I'm voting for your original anyway wink

James Lennox

19/01/24
6:53pm

comment on caption:
When asked about his heroism during the glue factory explosion, Dave replied "Has anyone got any solvent to get this prick off my back?" [Karen Oakenfull]

Thanks James. That’s much better. I love this edit suggestion option. I’ve written a lot of captions that have the idea, but a re-write can make the world of difference. Plus you learn more about creating better captions.

(caption author)

19/01/24
8:11pm

comment on caption:
When asked about his heroism during the glue factory explosion, Dave replied "Has anyone got any solvent to get this prick off my back?" [Karen Oakenfull]

Is it a Shotgun Wedding, then... or, "Matr AMO ny?"

[anon]

04/02/24
3:11am

comment on caption:
“No bridesmaids then?” [Karen Oakenfull]

I think the one in the middle looks a bit like Alvin Stardust.

Dave Bryan

23/03/24
8:38am

comment on caption:
I see Shawaddywaddy are still doing the rounds. [Karen Oakenfull]

Well the best thing to do is provide them with a picture with no stag at all. See how long it takes them to realise they've been had.

Or on the other hand that they're so narcissistic that their self worth is pivoted on proving themselves to the declaration that if they can find the deer (that doesn't exist) then they must have a very high IQ! 🤣

Glyn Evans

27/04/24
10:13pm

comment on caption:
“Only people with a very high IQ will be able to find a stag hidden within this tricky puzzle. Can you do it in just 10 seconds?!” [Karen Oakenfull]

Funny 😄

(caption author)

27/04/24
11:14pm

comment on caption:
“Only people with a very high IQ will be able to find a stag hidden within this tricky puzzle. Can you do it in just 10 seconds?!” [Karen Oakenfull]

I've got a print myself...actually I bought several more to reassure myself that I wasn't going mad as I just couldn't see that deer. Repeat the process as it were...but it just didn't work, I wasn't seeing it.

It turns out that I'd had them all hanging up the wrong way all of these years!

However the way that I've got them hung up now I'm sure that I should be looking for a polar bear in the mist or a reindeer as they're a lot whiter than the other side 🤗

Glyn Evans

28/04/24
8:31am

comment on caption:
“Only people with a very high IQ will be able to find a stag hidden within this tricky puzzle. Can you do it in just 10 seconds?!” [Karen Oakenfull]

I've got that one, it's actually a snowy owl in a blizzard.