Click a photo to add a caption.
''This should get the Germans off the sunbeds.''
07/08/24 11:06:55, edited: 07/08/24 11:10:54
I, Clawdius
05/08/24 19:02:59
"Just keep flying, Glorg. There's no sign of intelligent life."
30/07/24 19:01:49
“Dad was a workaholic but we saw him every 6 months.”
30/07/24 11:02:56
The Oval Office
27/07/24 19:02:20
"Dad, why are we balancing oranges on our heads?""Because I can't play the guitar and you can't sing."
13/07/24 12:26:03
"I normally get dressed in the Mirror."
13/07/24 7:10:21
This photo is so last year.
09/07/24 19:00:50
“Forget Elmo, Cookie Monster’s been blue for years.”
08/07/24 14:51:30
Someone's laced my tea
30/06/24 11:17:40, edited: 30/06/24 11:42:38
Most kids fire paper aeroplanes or bogies at their teacher when they're not looking. We used to fire tranquiliser darts.
26/06/24 11:04:41, edited: 26/06/24 11:05:27
Robert Plant and Kate Bush
23/06/24 7:10:07
Braking Bad
14/06/24 7:14:15
Gastronaut.
07/06/24 7:25:29
🎵 Working nine to Fyffe 🎵
05/06/24 19:02:45
He normally likes a roll on his back.
05/06/24 7:12:20
Hushed Puppy.
04/06/24 7:00:27
Self cervix
30/05/24 11:03:44
Tyrannosaurus Rest
29/05/24 19:00:44
After 5 years, Dave wondered if it would still be alive anyway.
25/05/24 7:04:51, edited: 25/05/24 7:19:49, suggested edits
“Have you dirtied your nappy?”“Why don’t you checkmate?”
23/05/24 19:03:37
Tommy Hellfigure
23/05/24 7:05:59
Tom, drip and Harry.
21/05/24 11:08:10
New Kits On The Block
20/05/24 11:00:38
Book launch
06/05/24 7:26:56
🎵 Pump up the volumes
06/05/24 7:12:34
It was at this point the doctor realised he had been on shift about 23 hours too long.
05/05/24 19:11:01
Police are searching for a blindfolded 5-year-old.
05/05/24 19:02:27, edited: 05/05/24 19:09:36
I need a hand going down the stairs
02/05/24 19:01:09, edited: 02/05/24 19:01:53
Just Desserts
23/04/24 19:00:31
Benthouse Apartment.
22/04/24 7:02:57
"j.vxd tyuiojkmn njy s[l; hj jggt jhb v rstdebg"And so, Susan decided captioning wasn't her thing.
21/04/24 21:46:59
Talk about flogging a dead horse
17/04/24 11:01:41
I always get emulsional when someone gives me flowers.
16/04/24 11:27:55
Z-Cars
10/04/24 11:03:55
Praywatch
08/04/24 19:01:09
WARNINGDrink responsibly. Too many cans can give you the puns.
07/04/24 7:07:54
No wonder there's potholes, they only have a skeleton staff.
06/04/24 11:05:53
Stop, Cluck, Listen
05/04/24 11:12:06
They didn't let their terrible colds spoil the day.
05/04/24 7:22:29
Moby Brick
28/03/24 20:09:45
Wall's have ears
27/03/24 12:00:43
"What's the matter? You look like you got a latte on your mind."
27/03/24 8:15:35
Your mum walks with a very weird gait
26/03/24 8:54:46
"WAIT LADS! VAR have disallowed it!"
20/03/24 20:54:35
Have you been letting the Princess of Wales take your photo again ?
14/03/24 12:06:43
“You can take the steering lock off the bagels now too.”
12/03/24 8:29:34
"Quick we need to get across the border before Trump is elected"
06/03/24 8:08:06
It was all plane sailing
02/03/24 20:07:43, edited: 02/03/24 20:08:08
"Mum says she wants her swimming costume back."
02/03/24 8:22:30
Losta Coffee
26/02/24 20:19:38
🎵 Tiers on my pillow
25/02/24 20:03:31
"I told you not to squeeze that pimple, Dave."
23/02/24 20:38:40
"Ok, girls, now our husbands have gone, let's put away the Tupperware and bring out the vibrators."
22/02/24 20:01:42, edited: 23/02/24 5:26:55, suggested edits
Amazingly, the reel of film found in the bear's excrement was able to be developed.
21/02/24 8:08:16, edited: 21/02/24 8:41:44, suggested edits
Earthy, bitter and with an unusual nose. The wine's not bad though.
20/02/24 8:01:36
One Million Years CBBC
15/02/24 8:07:03
He goes like a rocket.
13/02/24 20:33:02
Travel under your own steam.
11/02/24 8:02:48
After a long tiring day, Mrs House liked to relax with a nice soothing avocado facia mask.
02/02/24 8:55:55
"Excuse me, sir, can you pull over. We recently had another ostrich photo and the Cat Union is complaining."
01/02/24 20:07:16
Twat.
31/01/24 20:17:12
He wanted to be a pillar of the community so he’s going to be holding up the new town hall.
30/01/24 8:01:22
He thought he was swimming in a lake of Irn Bru. Turns out it was actually a Fanta sea.
24/01/24 20:08:18
Never steal from McDonald's in Tehran.
23/01/24 20:02:26
Children should be seen and not hurled.
19/01/24 8:05:40
Jimi Appendix
17/01/24 8:02:27
I smelt something cooking.
13/01/24 20:03:03
Mistakes and Ladders
12/01/24 20:31:32
Dolly Bird.
12/01/24 8:16:16
Barbie-que chicken
12/01/24 8:01:02
Dave was shocked to see Bertie Bassett in the nude.
10/01/24 20:18:44
Business Class
06/01/24 20:04:13, edited: 06/01/24 20:11:14
Stopped in his tracks
05/01/24 12:27:47, edited: 05/01/24 12:27:56
"Bethlehem? It's a long way, guv - I'll need to charge you the return fare."
01/01/24 8:01:26
Two airport staff arrested for people trafficking
31/12/23 9:43:09
"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE FLYING THAT SLEIGH YOU FAT BASTARD!!"
24/12/23 20:05:41
''I love these Gala apples.''''I prefer Granny Smith.''''You're too late. Bruno ate her yesterday.''
24/12/23 8:44:24
BEFORE THEY WERE FAMOUSEdvard Munch
23/12/23 12:47:16
Down hearted
22/12/23 12:18:48
Dave and Janet got married despite being poles apart.
20/12/23 8:02:57
“I knew we should’ve read the small print on those donor cards.”
19/12/23 23:35:33
Pirelli the Elephant
17/12/23 12:04:41
Royal Ayr Force
16/12/23 20:10:50
Dave's cunning plan to sneak off to the pub was working so far.
13/12/23 20:43:23
"Not now, dear. I'm trying to hibernate."
13/12/23 20:02:29
"They had run out of Christmas trees" said Dave
11/12/23 8:28:24
I will not shit outside the litter trayI will not shit outside the litter trayI will not shit outside the litter tray
10/12/23 8:15:17, edited: 10/12/23 10:58:37
“I wish they’d shown me what the virgins looked like before I blew myself up….”
05/12/23 8:42:03, edited: 05/12/23 11:25:40
“It’s just puppy fat.”
04/12/23 12:00:26
That's no way to raise a child
03/12/23 20:17:48
Have you ever wondered why roadworks take so long?
29/11/23 8:02:14
Ineptune
19/11/23 8:09:03
"...Karyn Harrison, what the hell are you doing in our airing cupboard?"
18/11/23 12:25:09
Pallet of the Apes
17/11/23 20:01:09, edited: 17/11/23 20:01:51
DDarth Vader
07/11/23 8:04:00
"The babies are always so contented with you! What's your secret?""Ten nipples."
04/11/23 12:41:57
Buoy Racer
01/11/23 12:01:20
Ale Order Bride
29/10/23 8:12:38
Bean & Jerry's
28/10/23 19:04:05
suggested edits
