Some people just have to milk every photo opportunity

15/05/18 14:04:16

lol

It was pot luck night at the tanning salon

06/04/18 15:36:23

Ah, here's lunch. Careful with the camera... we'll put it on eBay later.

02/02/18 13:36:08

She looks full of it

31/01/18 20:19:51

I'm not sitting here any more, I'm bordeaux this

12/12/17 21:00:39

Well dear, I think that's the last of the Trick or Treaters

06/11/17 8:20:39

Bob

18/10/17 20:11:51

"Doggone it! That's 119 missed lampposts."

17/10/17 14:11:30

Trev tried to hide behind his respectable day job but everyone knew he was really a troll.

05/10/17 11:12:27

With her new vision aids, Cynthia felt that she'd turned a corner

09/07/17 8:46:24

"The Anger Management Classes are this way."
"No, they're not, they're down that road."
"I'M EFFING TELLING YOU, THEY'RE THIS EFFING WAY!"

15/02/17 11:18:53

Let the dog-washing commence

14/02/17 14:14:27

They were definitely in there when we set off

04/02/17 8:01:51

lol

Big Ed!

20/12/16 8:00:15

A gas trick delight?

02/12/16 9:53:18

'Did someone just pin the tail correctly?'

15/10/16 8:26:36

Postal Strike!

25/08/16 12:29:21

"Let us spray."

08/04/24 20:06:53

Agreed - Along with is, written, in and stone.

02/10/23 8:04:31

"Ooh, can I stroke it?" asked Tina.

28/09/23 20:48:16

Bill E. Gote

09/09/23 12:31:21

"Dave, remember yesterday when the farmer held us up with his slow tractor and you stuck your fingers up at him...?"

16/07/23 8:41:04

For some reason he didn't drop off.

14/07/23 13:23:59

"Dad and Wills both suggested we should BOGOF."

14/06/23 20:51:31

"Gas mark 6 for two hours and I'll go and get the Chianti."

09/05/23 20:29:39

He doesn't care what she votes for as long as she's Liberal later tonight

08/05/23 8:05:04

"I'm going to cut them up."

02/04/23 20:05:32

Bradley Waggings

12/02/23 8:57:56

Even back then Tina was a little scrubber

03/02/23 8:20:18

clever

"I'm sick of it! All these new houses popping up overnight."

12/01/23 8:33:33

When all your favourite clothes are in the wash

27/12/22 21:31:38

"Hello, HELLO? Speak up please, I'm mutton Jeff."

23/10/22 8:32:58, edited: 23/10/22 8:34:08

🎵 These roots were made for walking...

01/10/22 12:31:40

clever

Spherely overfed

29/08/22 12:10:17

If it's yellow let it mellow
If it's brown flush it down
If it's white... summat's not right

28/07/22 12:10:13

Night night, rider

24/07/22 12:11:20

They were...but now they are prosthetic spines for plants wishing to identify as a cactus

17/06/22 8:27:03

🎵 I believe I can fly - By R Collie

11/05/22 16:37:39

lol

"Ahh, you give the best massages, Dave. No bones about it."

10/05/22 14:28:34

"Cringer, can't you just go in next door's flowerbed?"

23/03/22 8:15:10

Barkour

22/03/22 20:40:47

"Here, do you want a slug?"
"NOOOOOOOO!"

21/03/22 12:24:47

When it's cold it's usually sensible to carry an extra fleece

27/02/22 13:22:50

"Can't.quite.see.around.that.tall.building - Everyone, please come and stand this side... that's better."

24/02/22 8:15:27

"Nice but could maybe do with a candela-bra."

22/02/22 13:40:02

Inflatable underpants - never really took off

18/02/22 12:07:43

"Psst... Hey, I'm starving, mate - let me know if you see any zebras."

05/02/22 12:02:05

Doggles

20/01/22 12:01:09

"This car is a real pussy magnet"

17/01/22 20:20:29

Dammit! Just when I need them Security has confiscated my scissors.

20/12/21 8:13:56

It's great fun at the Cadbury Open Day

14/12/21 12:00:28

"Mopsy! Why can't you be like normal dogs and just hump the furniture?"

10/12/21 12:09:34

They're not ones for keeping things bottled up

29/11/21 8:52:03

Members of the Flat Earth Society

25/10/21 8:03:33

'Best thing...hic...I ever did,' mused Brian, 'hic...spreading that gardening rumour about beer killing slugs and snails.'

04/10/21 12:36:15

lol

"Yes, I'd be delighted to dance with you. Oh, just a moment... PAAAARRRP"

29/09/21 12:27:18

Starbucks - A great place to put your feet up

14/09/21 14:56:47

The day the gulls got smart. The text read:

'You can have it back in exchange for a portion of chips and two battered sausages'

05/08/21 8:02:29

"Rover, we'll never get there if we have to stop at every post."

31/07/21 8:12:30

"Hermione, I think it's time I inspected your chamber of secrets."

04/06/21 8:31:03

🎵🎵🎵 Feline hot, hot, hot

15/04/21 8:21:30

Someone's having Olaf

06/04/21 8:06:27

Was anything learned at this seminar?
Remains to be seen.

03/04/21 14:39:30

A fish called 'What da...?'

01/04/21 12:00:57

When he was being born the contracts were coming in about a minute apart

27/02/21 22:02:35

Babies and the news - both full of shite

23/02/21 12:41:36

The Cat that got the cream...the cake and all the pies

11/02/21 12:04:38

Higher cars

08/09/20 20:01:03

Dave wondered which idiot had hung them upside down

17/07/20 13:19:35

"What's up with him, Doc?"

15/07/20 8:18:54

Gimp my ride

21/06/20 8:35:01

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bus

17/06/20 8:18:54

Dave was later arrested for driving at full tilt.

01/06/20 12:53:07

Back off! Me don't want siblings...

20/03/20 8:35:03

"The missus treats me like a dogsbody"

12/03/20 12:42:35

"Dave, when I said 'Take a seat'..."

21/02/20 8:13:52

"...and here's Fay with her latest squeeze."

09/02/20 14:43:44

'Darn sight tastier than that crap the old woman sells for tuppence a bag,' Peter thought.

03/10/19 14:46:05

"Sir, that's not the handbrake"

01/10/19 20:16:27

I hate window shopping

17/08/19 13:45:03

Eddie Van Halen a taxi

04/05/19 14:21:36

lol

"I fake tanned before I came out, okay?"

01/03/19 21:31:34

lol

Helicopter hairdos are more prone to crash landings

06/01/19 14:09:21

"Hah! That's the last time he'll try to p-p-p-pick me up..."

20/09/18 8:05:55

"Huh, what's this paper stuff? I heard her bag's full of bread."

31/08/18 8:15:17

Tittoo

10/08/18 8:13:47

It's generally easier swimming with currants

26/07/18 21:04:01

Walls have fears

15/06/18 18:37:28

Nora Batty

05/04/18 8:42:19

She'd bagged herself a bloke

01/03/18 8:04:57

Having a skinful can be A positive experience

05/02/18 8:04:45

'Now,' pondered Miss Jones, 'Where is that file on "Acceptable Dress Policy and Sexual Harassment in the Workplace"?'

17/01/18 15:11:39

Satzoomer

09/01/18 8:40:06

Keeping her heir dry?

21/12/17 15:55:00

Waiting for a vote

09/12/17 10:21:59

- "Can I have my shirt back, Officer?"
- "Button it, Sonny."

06/10/17 15:42:00

"Yeah, sometimes she's putty in my hands but other times she can be a pane."

09/07/17 20:29:23

Dave hits the headlines

04/02/17 20:17:56

Len's waiting in the wing

10/01/17 19:22:43

"I'd try one, but I do think the little man on the top is rather garish!"

05/01/17 9:17:22