Purrlesque

11/02/21 12:10:10

"Nice tat, is that Jim Morrison and the Doors?"

"No, it's actually four Peruvian shrunken heads, but I used to be a few dress sizes smaller."

11/02/21 12:43:25

Pondering whether or not to accept the request to join Trump's impeachment defence team.

11/02/21 12:11:09

The Cat that got the cream...the cake and all the pies

11/02/21 12:04:38

Mrs Smith, as a supply teacher have you ever done a parents evening before?

11/02/21 21:12:41

"I'm not a Cat."

11/02/21 14:01:15

"Up next on 'how I lost my legs', Dave tells us about the time he went to a lap dancing club..."

11/02/21 12:11:07

The Bowel and the Pussycat

11/02/21 12:38:30

Kit Kat Chunky

11/02/21 12:00:07

Not one for conspiracies, but TWO Elephant caption photos in a row ?!?!

11/02/21 15:23:49

8 out of 10 cats prefer Whiskers. The other 2 prefer Large Donner Meat and Chips, a 12 inch Cheesy Garlic Bread and a tub of Häagen-Dazs belgian chocolate ice cream.

11/02/21 12:25:09

This Valentines I'm hoping for some Heavy petting

11/02/21 12:22:04

They call her Evet.

E.V.E.T : Extreme Viagra Efficacy Test

11/02/21 15:28:22

"Just say 'no thanks'. It's not hard."

11/02/21 13:18:02

Pussy Galwhore

11/02/21 13:03:29

Jello Kitty

11/02/21 12:38:12

Tina couldn't help feeling hungry as she watched a guy in the corner of the room eating a Hotdog.

11/02/21 12:17:14

''I'm sorry, Sandra, Munchies is the name of the DJ. It's no use pretending you're a cat.''

11/02/21 12:15:19

"I never thought I'd ever hear myself say this but...I don't fancy pussy tonight"

11/02/21 12:08:58

"Put her down!"

"That's what I said to the vet."

11/02/21 12:03:23

What Leslie Grantham was looking at on his laptop.

11/02/21 12:02:16

"Social Media is great", people say. Well, it is until you come across this picture of your Mum attending a party when you think she's doing a night shift at the hospital.

11/02/21 12:00:56

Zubaz.com had hoped for a more edgey venue for thier plus size range.

11/02/21 22:04:32

You really look like a cat.
Like a Persian?
No Bagpuss.

11/02/21 20:18:42

♫ Be Bop Beluga she’s my Lading…
Be Bop Beluga my Crane is Straining ♫

11/02/21 19:16:19

Me ouch!

11/02/21 15:55:14

Me: ow!

11/02/21 15:54:34

"Hit me, baby, one more time"

11/02/21 15:46:55

"You've lost your phone, the one in a black leather case with the matching carrying handle, and I've put it where?"

11/02/21 15:06:24

She's making herself gag and everyone else.

11/02/21 14:43:23

Jodie mum's advice rang true, never leave the house without clean underwear

11/02/21 14:32:37

Jodie decided it would be best to dance for the crowd, better than being punched in the face

11/02/21 14:27:29

Millie came first in the annual farting contest with this intricately detailed 'Munchies' vapour

11/02/21 13:44:29

Nice tats.

11/02/21 13:41:08

"Another Milk Stout Mandy?"

11/02/21 13:10:54

"I hope nobody notices my coil just fell out."

11/02/21 13:08:18

The Tin Man wondered where the fuck he had landed

11/02/21 13:04:13

Spare a thought for bulimia sufferers who lack a gag reflex.

11/02/21 12:59:05

For God's sake Sharon I asked you to pick up the glasses and clear the tables but it's taking ages and their is a mess everywhere.
Sorry I didn't use the litter tray.

11/02/21 12:49:15

"She told me she was separated. I didn't realise she meant from her Siamese twin."

11/02/21 12:33:31

"Apparently she used to be a very successful businesswoman who donated to the Tories."

11/02/21 12:29:09

''How did your Cats audition go, Sandra?''

''Not very well. They gave the part to Elaine Paige.''

11/02/21 12:20:19

The Chuckle brothers had a 3 some ...tattoo me tattoo you.

11/02/21 12:15:41

"Sophie, is that Cream on your thigh?"
- "No I've just had a quicky with Gary in the toilets, I thought I had wiped it all off"

11/02/21 12:00:53

Do you think I'm sexy??

11/02/21 12:00:44