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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	73	22	62	#2	39	96	#2	13043	31131	#5
Photos
Comments	19	4	6	#2	5	9	#2	1321	1552	#4
Forum Posts		3						13
Suggested Edits								6	6	#9

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	31	#7	40	#8	13118	#18
Photos	1	#12			658	#28
Comments	2	#3	3	#7	1121	#7
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits	2	#2			10	#5

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	''We don't have to watch the TV, darling. An interesting conversation would be a pleasant change.'' ''OK, I'll wake the dog up.'' 12/09/21 8:52:50	14

	''Before I answer any more questions I want a lawyer.'' ''Why?'' ''I'm hungry.'' 07/09/21 20:52:22	1 14
Depends who will eat who first. Sharks eat leopards. --Glyn Evans
	''Ten euros is a lot of money. I only paid five euros for the last one.'' 13/08/21 20:10:59	1 14
"Tell you what, I'll throw in the teddy bear." --Karyn Harrison
	''Did you fly here?'' ''No, I came by rail.'' 25/07/21 8:35:59	14

	''It's the plumber. I've told him to come up.'' 19/07/21 8:25:29	14

	Gordon The Golfer 04/07/21 8:00:13	14

	''And that's how you work out your weekly caption quota.'' 22/06/21 12:37:46	1 14

	''It looks like his winning streak is about to come to an end.'' 29/04/21 8:35:59	14

	lol ''I've got to go now. It's time for the midday caption.'' 09/03/21 12:18:56	1 14
He really doesn't know whether he's coming or going. --Willie Johnson
	clever ''Go to work on an egg.'' 30/11/20 12:02:10	14

	''I'm so grateful you managed to unblock the sink.'' 09/11/20 20:15:27	14

	lol ''Don't come running to me, if you fall off.'' 04/10/20 20:35:59	14

	''Darling, when I said you could do with an extra few inches......'' 22/09/20 8:25:40	14

	clever ''It's stopped raining, darling. Let's get out of here.'' 24/08/20 21:35:28	14

	News has reached the fishermen that the schools will soon be back. 25/05/20 8:34:45	14

	''We had to take him off transplants. He kept eating the liver.'' 30/04/20 9:09:19	1 14
That's offal! --Vivvy En
	''How do you feel since you've been on the Frontline?'' ''Great. It's got rid of all my fleas.'' 30/04/20 8:28:49	14

	''Dostoyevsky always cracks me up.'' 23/04/20 20:06:18	14

	Tom Baker 13/04/20 20:21:27	14

	''If I were you, I wouldn't keep shouting 'Heel'.'' 21/03/20 8:02:07	14

	Frozen pees 23/12/19 8:00:15	14

	''Please remember not to leave stormtroopers in cars during the hot weather.'' 19/12/19 12:24:57	1 14
At least leave a window slightly open and have some water available. And turn off the child safety lock, we all know he won't be able to shoot the windows out in an emergency. --Willie Johnson
	''Shall I tell the driver you've fixed it?'' ''This is Southern Rail, mate. I am the f--king driver.'' 07/12/19 12:16:40	14

	A bad case of nappy rasher 23/11/19 20:00:47	14

	clever x2 ''It was an amicable divorce. We shared everything.'' 16/11/19 12:12:00	4 14
Did he give her the boot? --Mr Dome
	creative ''....and sold tomorrow.'' 31/08/19 8:08:18	1 14

	Guaranteed to make your breath smell fowl. 28/08/19 12:16:40	14

	Another cabinet reshuffle 23/06/19 20:02:12	14

	Attractive girls always have buoys hanging round them. 13/06/19 8:00:33	14

	The film is even scarier than the trailer. 28/04/19 12:00:19	14

	''Do you comb here often?'' 07/03/19 20:05:48	2 14
ðŸ˜‚ Havenâ€™t got any supervotes this week but wanted to tell you that after seeing this pic for time, I think your caption is really funny ðŸ˜ --Karen Oakenfull
	''The drinks are on me.'' 01/01/19 12:13:00	2 14
I reckon this caption would be even better without the first half. --Molly R
	Goldfish 28/12/18 12:00:56	14

	lol ''Sod the Milk Tray. Get me back to the surface.'' 14/12/18 12:35:23	14

	''Oops, I've dropped the baby down the toilet.'' 15/11/18 12:03:43	6 14
"I baptize you Floaty McFloatface." --Karyn Harrison
	clever A recent survey suggests that 3 out of 10 people have difficulty opening Windows. 12/08/18 8:08:57	14

	As he walked through the back streets of Marseille, Pierre began to notice some pain underneath his right arm. 17/06/18 12:02:18	14

	Pantyhose 19/02/18 8:02:57	14

	''I ate three packets of Trill this morning, Officer.'' ''In that case I'm going to have to book you for breaking the seed limit.'' Sat 20:16:10	13

	''I'm definitely going to beat that tortoise this time.'' ''How can you be certain?'' ''I've just run over it.'' Fri 21:18:41	13

	''Surely he can't miss from that distance.'' 04/04/24 20:27:38	13

	''I keep winning sheets of toilet paper. I must be on a roll.'' 28/03/24 12:10:23, edited: 28/03/24 12:21:14	13

	Dave was beginning to regret using the Plenty of Fish dating app. 22/03/24 8:14:02	13

	''Watch out for that cow, Pat.'' 13/03/24 8:38:27	13

	lol ''You bastard!'' 24 HOURS EARLIER ''I know you hate walking, Mary, but when you get to the top there's a cafe where they do fantastic afternoon teas.'' 05/03/24 12:09:51, edited: 05/03/24 12:25:27	13

	''Don't worry, Goldilocks, you can sleep in my bed.'' 28/02/24 12:02:00	13

	The Stilton Hotel 15/02/24 12:31:49	13

	''Did I pass?'' 11/02/24 20:19:02	13

	lol x3 ''Watch out, mate. Michael Parkinson is gaining on you.'' 28/01/24 8:15:29	13

	''Is Mary enjoying herself?'' ''She's having a bawl.'' 25/01/24 12:33:01, edited: 25/01/24 12:38:21	13

	Nan's People 16/12/23 12:10:57	13

	Benson and Hedges deny pitching new ad campaign at underage smokers. 06/12/23 12:13:49	13

	Dave and Tina had been in a stable relationship for some time. 04/12/23 8:07:41	13

	''We can't have apes taking over our jobs. I'm going to see the foreman about this.'' ''He is the foreman.'' 17/11/23 20:02:00, edited: 17/11/23 20:11:04	1 13

	''Let's give them a big hand.'' 20/10/23 20:51:39	13

	creative ''I'm not eating these. Half of them have already gone off.'' 07/10/23 12:51:49	13

	''I'd have him for lunch but he'll probably start repeating on me.'' 18/08/23 20:06:37	13

	Clerk Kent 21/04/23 20:00:15	13

	Harmchair 06/02/23 8:04:02	13

	I can remember the good old days of caption.me when we had a cat photo every week. Unfortunately, the site has gone to the dogs. 08/12/22 8:16:23	13

	''Cheese!'' ''Actually, they're smokey bacon.'' 29/11/22 8:01:34	13

	''By identifying as a potato, I'm hoping to develop a thick skin.'' 27/10/22 8:44:41	13

	''A vote for me is a vote for change.'' 25/10/22 12:10:12	13

	lol ''I've managed to attach the wreath to the front of the van.'' ''Well done. Now throw the coffin in the back and let's get going. We need to be at Westminster Abbey by 11.00am.'' 18/09/22 8:41:11	13

	lol ''Dave was one of our most dedicated Snaptioneers. He would do anything to get a good photo. He will be greatly missed by all his friends on the site.'' 13/08/22 12:09:02	1 13

	Winner of the Hooker Prize 24/07/22 20:09:11	13

	creative ''This is stressing me out, dad. Where's the button to turn the page?'' 29/05/22 12:02:57	1 13
"Your brother will know. Phone him.""With what?" --Glad You Remember
	''Who's the father?'' ''God knows.'' 06/05/22 12:07:33	13

	Two men who deserve to be hung. 27/03/22 20:00:13	7 13
Prints are supplied in 4 pieces...having been hung, drawn and quartered. --Stephen Bean
	lol ''Hey, guys....'' ''Shut up, driver. She's taking off her blouse.'' 05/02/22 12:13:52	1 13
Lions and voyeurs and boobs, oh my! --Glad You Remember
	''That tapeworm is putting up a jolly good fight, girls.'' 04/02/22 20:12:59	13

	TEXT: ''Have you ever had an accident that was not your fault?'' REPLY TEXT: ''Why the f-ck do you think I'm getting married?'' 29/01/22 12:12:39	13

	Son worshipper 31/12/21 20:34:15	1 13
For the other son, it looks like a total eclipse. --Willie Johnson
	''I did not have an affair with Camilla while I was married to Diana.'' 21/12/21 12:01:01	1 13
"... and don't be a nosey Parker Bowles." --James Lennox
	lol ''How now, brown cow?'' 10/12/21 8:04:36	13

	''This is for getting stuck up the wrong chimney last night.'' 06/12/21 8:00:34	13

	''I'm afraid there's been a big mistake. Leopold is not buried here. It must be some other fucker.'' 25/10/21 12:03:24	1 13
It's probably some Kunt or Koch --Glyn Evans
	''Look, dad, a flying saucer is coming our way.'' ''Makes a change. Your mother usually throws the teapot at me.'' 10/09/21 8:21:58	13

	''I am f-cking smiling.'' 15/08/21 8:09:57	13

	clever ''At least I'll have no problems hanging his shit on the trees.'' 03/07/21 12:28:17	13

	lol ''Are you going to be long, mate? I'm desperate for a hiss.'' 05/05/21 8:00:36	13

	Passing out parade 29/04/21 12:00:09	13

	''Whatever people say, we'll never quit the habit.'' 27/04/21 12:00:10	1 13
Ok, habit your way. --Willie Johnson
	''What are those men doing, sergeant?'' ''They didn't feel well, sir, so I put them on light duties.'' 16/03/21 12:03:55	13

	Sadly, their drunken father was later thrown out of the Tate Modern for making an exhibition of himself. 11/03/21 12:21:28	1 13
Apparently Tracey Emin's bed was too inviting. --Karyn Harrison
	''Say cheese.'' 04/02/21 8:01:01	13

	''He married her because she was good in the sack.'' 24/01/21 20:14:22	13

	Sorry I missed you. Next time I'll hit you with it. 05/01/21 8:00:38	1 13
I hit everything else though - the house, the car, the walkway, the porch, the mailbox.... --Willie Johnson
	''I haven't seen my family for weeks.'' ''Because of the restrictions?'' ''No, I just f-cking hate them.'' 24/09/20 20:10:30	13

	''It's not just the very narrow fairway that makes the fifth hole so challenging for golfers.'' 21/09/20 12:30:42	1 13
It's also the extremely large gophers. --Willie Johnson
	''Mr Hefner, you've forgotten your 'T'.'' 31/08/20 20:01:19	13

	Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, eating her curds and whey. Along came a spider who sat down beside her. That's the third one she's eaten today. 22/08/20 8:40:01	13

	''Ha! Ha! The Queen is wearing that ridiculous hat again.'' 10/08/20 8:18:32	13

	''What kind of fish are you?'' ''Don't tell him, Pike.'' 14/05/20 8:04:31	1 13
If you do...WE're ALL DOOMED. --Woofer 6
	Dave couldn't understand why he only ever caught flat fish. 13/05/20 8:24:39	2 13
He goes fishing for the halibut. --Willie Johnson
	lol ''Cut! Sly, can you try and look a bit more animated in the next shoot?'' 21/04/20 8:15:53	13

	''Have you you been tested?'' ''Yes, they say I'm f-cking crazy.'' 03/04/20 8:05:13	13

	clever Grounded! 31/03/20 12:40:41	1 13
A reasonable punishment. --Scrijjy Doo
	Friendly fire 14/02/20 20:05:07	13

	''If you want some action, fellas, just give me a ring.'' 07/01/20 8:02:50	13

more captions

last comments (total: 864)

Apologies. You must have voted as I changed it. I've reverted back to the original.

(caption author)

04/04/24
10:11am

comment on caption:
Putting a different slant on moving house [Dave Bryan]

Mummy long legs

[anon]

14/04/24
3:22pm

comment on caption:
Maddy long legs [Dave Bryan]

Apologies, saw this pic, thought of my daughter, and posted straight away. I didn't see that you had the exact same caption (other that the spelling).