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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	40	2			4	4	#31	2677	3648	#49
Photos			1	#10		1	#10	13	40	#15
Comments	12	2	4	#2				569	746	#12
Forum Posts		1						77
Suggested Edits	7	1						17	19	#5

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	29	#15	26	#20	7005	#32
Photos					819	#22
Comments	2	#3	1	#4	281	#27
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits					1	#13

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	"I wish I'd brought one of the wife's scatter cushions to hold on my lap." 01/03/19 12:02:53	4

	When your profile said you had an 18-inch waist, I expected the rest of you to be in proportion 21/02/19 12:00:38	4

	He was disappointed. He had hoped for a fried egg that looked like Jesus. 17/02/19 20:00:54	1 4
And it looks like Piers Morgan. That's just plain unclucky! --Karyn Harrison
	"I can't believe nobody remembered the hang-gliders." 05/02/19 8:02:42	4

	Reminder to self... 17/01/19 20:00:43	4

	"I'm not sitting too close to her, just look at the warning notice." 08/01/19 12:00:04	4

	How I feel after Christmas 30/12/18 12:00:36	5 4
I can identify with this. The healthy eating regime generally lasts until January 2nd. I can't resist a Nando's! --Karyn Harrison
	I don't think much of this smokers' area. 14/12/18 8:05:53	4

	The Swiss never quite got the hang of the yard of ale competition. 11/10/18 8:00:24	4


24/09/18 8:01:00		1 4
So funny, great imagination. --Funny Bean
	My feet are killing me 03/09/18 8:00:46	4

	"The doctor told me that long walks would reduce the swelling in my legs, and advised me to get a dog." 08/05/24 12:02:53	3

	"So, Mrs Morris, this is the bathroom you want me to redecorate?" "Yes please, before William comes home." 04/05/24 8:58:19	3

	"Can I snuggle up to you? My heating isn't working." 22/04/24 8:12:04	3

	"Life was much more exciting when I ran Microsoft." 23/03/24 8:02:14	3

	"My son, you do not need to tell me what we did last night." 23/03/24 8:01:37	3

	"Son, you'll get on better if you plug it in." 22/01/24 8:09:50	3

	"Where's the chicken aisle? We can't have a hen party without it!" 27/12/23 8:26:42	3

	The upper class. 20/12/23 8:04:16	3

	"Fair enough, the other ones haven't come along so well." 04/09/23 8:00:29	3

	"Well, if the Americans can play golf on the moon..." 29/08/23 12:15:26	3

	"I haven't seen one as good as this for 75 years!" 16/08/23 8:05:10, edited: 16/08/23 8:05:16	3

	"Sandra, let me in - I've forgotten my key again!" 03/07/23 8:09:31	3

	"Dave, you simply cannot have a dump there!" 27/06/23 8:11:02, edited: 27/06/23 8:26:43	2 3
From the looks of the water he already did. --Willie Johnson
	When you can't bear to throw out your cool 70s gear... 25/06/23 8:00:45, edited: 25/06/23 8:00:58	3

	Just as well that Bowie quickly abandoned this idea. 14/06/23 12:02:15	1 3
I remember the album, Saladin Sane. --Karen McDonald
	"No-o-o-o! Why have I got six fingers???" 04/06/23 8:14:15	3

	For men with really, really sweaty feet. 15/03/23 12:07:45	3

	"Delivery for Macarthur Park." "Someone left the cake out in the rain!" 28/02/23 12:00:08	3

	"Cathy!" "Heathcliff!" 20/02/23 12:01:20	3

	The KKK insist that their new robes are not a sign of cowardice. 07/02/23 12:00:08	1 3

	Climate change is producing extreme changes in wildlife behaviour 20/01/23 8:12:31	3

	When you can't afford to turn the heating on. 05/01/23 8:00:11	3

	Cute as hell 15/12/22 8:00:29	3

	"Turn left ... straight on ... stop ... right a bit ... stop ...reach out ... take milk..." 04/12/22 8:00:08	3

	So, who uses RightGuard? 23/09/22 8:14:26	1 3
The fascists. The commies use LeftGuard. --Scrijjy Doo
	I told you not to let them watch Lady and The Tramp. 21/09/22 12:00:05	3

	The problem is that blinking one in the middle. 17/09/22 12:00:46	3

	"Please, please don't call me ginger." 22/08/22 12:00:51	3

	"That's not exactly what I meant when I said 'hold up'." 19/08/22 8:00:06	3

	Rat-arsed. 12/07/22 12:00:09	3

	"No, I have no idea how I caught chlamydia." 01/06/22 8:04:13	3

	What really creeps me out is the one with only one eye. 28/05/22 17:54:30	3

	lol I guess the idea is to send the flame horizontally into the curtains. 13/04/22 12:00:14	3

	As recommended by #MeToo victims. 13/04/22 8:00:07	1 3
Nah, I don't think pointed chain mail goes far enough. Surely you'd want them to be electrified or to shoot lasers?Male #MeToo victims are also going to look rather silly in these. Chastity belts have also made a comeback... --Glyn Evans
	You always remember too late that there is one crucial thing you had meant to put in the wash. 24/03/22 12:00:06	3

	creative And the crocodile pulled and pulled, Best Beloved, and the Elephant's Child pulled and pulled, and his nose stretched and stretched, and the Elephant's Child said "Led go! You are hurtig be!" 22/03/22 8:22:26	3

	Tina gave it a bad review. 17/02/22 12:00:29	3

	"Cough, please." 01/02/22 22:01:47	3

	"Of course I need both hands to do this - don't you know I've got a bifurcated penis?" 27/12/21 12:08:34	3

	🎵 And the wheels on the bus go round and round...🎵 Oh no, they don't - sorry, kids. 16/12/21 12:06:46	1 3

	"C'mon, Lance, it'll make all the difference to your performance." 13/10/21 8:00:07	3

	"What, no votes at all for any captions? Ha-ha-ha! Perhaps that'll make you all get a life." 19/09/21 18:57:50	3 3
It might be a reaction shot to cats or children in peril. --Glyn Evans
	Special offer today, 3 for 2 - stop me and buy one 29/07/21 8:26:11	1 3
Right next to the Durex seller. 'Buy me and stop one'. --John Glover
	@God, please let my hair grow back again #baldie #ashamed #outcast 28/06/21 8:22:21	3

	Hamming it up. 27/05/21 12:15:05	3

	"Get a move on and jump, won't you? I'm getting tired of queuing." 23/05/21 8:11:24	3

	"No, that's fine - you can certainly put that cold chicken in here." 08/05/21 8:00:28	3

	Black ho's matter too. 28/04/21 8:00:58	3

	"No, I'm scratching my head over how it works, too." 23/04/21 20:33:38	3

	Gravey. 11/04/21 12:01:05	3

	"Leave me alone. This is the most interesting thing that's happened since I was born." 14/03/21 9:58:31	3

	Desperate for a haircut during lockdown, Dave didn't quite understand how to use the pudding basin. 05/03/21 8:04:14	3

	"Doesn't he just melt your heart?" "No." 07/02/21 8:12:05	3

	"You're my world, Dave." 05/02/21 12:00:20	1 3
You circled the globe to find him. --Willie Johnson
	"The wheels started coming off after my third bottle." 27/01/21 12:08:38	3

	Everything was fine until he got to the front door. 20/01/21 8:02:03	3

	The Ghost of Sithmas Past. 03/01/21 12:01:43	3

	Hang on a moment, Archimedes - we forgot the fulcrum. 02/01/21 8:00:07	3

	Please do not feed the alligators. They cannot digest metal. 14/12/20 8:24:42	3

	What with no Mother Christmas around, Santa was desperate for a ride. 12/12/20 12:00:45	3 3
You've broken my heart. --Dave Bryan
	"Just watch out for that green crocodile, Charlie." 11/10/20 8:00:06	3

	For one of these, you need deep pockets. 06/10/20 12:00:39	3

	"If I'm to hide your bald spot, I haven't got time for deodorant." 01/10/20 12:00:06	3

	Bored man of the chair 26/09/20 12:05:36	3

	"I've sat here all week, but no sign of a six-foot man yet." "Same here." 24/09/20 20:00:28	3

	"Sorry, but since we took your order the rules have changed - we can only serve six of you." 22/09/20 20:00:08	3

	C'mon, Arthur, we must try and keep fit during lockdown. 19/09/20 8:04:00	3

	"It gets a bit boring, waiting for Banksy to turn up and draw us." 29/08/20 22:04:26	3

	"Who's got his hand on Grandma's tit?" 29/08/20 12:00:19	3

	"I remember when I had the whole of this continent to roam in. Now look at what I have left." 14/08/20 12:00:06	1 3
Too close to the truth unfortunately. --Willie Johnson
	"If men can pee behind a plant-pot, so can I." 02/08/20 13:07:31	3

	I don't know where they all come from. You start off with just two little bunnies... 02/08/20 8:13:13	3

	"OK, we admit it - the mammoth meat is not fresh, it's deep-frozen." 16/07/20 8:41:58	3

	"Please go to Morrisons and buy me a wholemeal loaf and two litres of milk." 15/07/20 20:05:14	3

	"They make me do the shopping on the way home from school." "Well, they make me carry my baby brother around like a papoose." "Where is he, then?" 08/07/20 22:06:09	3

	The dog was easy. Tinting the shadows was a bit harder. 05/07/20 8:05:17	3

	I'm going to be a vegan, Mummy. 22/04/20 12:00:09	3

	I come from a household which is short on loo paper. 22/04/20 8:12:46	3

	Do not pee into the wind. 17/04/20 12:00:41	1 3
That's one way of getting your own back. --John Glover
	Please let me out, Mr SchrÃ¶dinger - I'm half-dead in here! 12/04/20 8:03:18	1 3

	Remember, two metres apart at all times... 09/04/20 8:04:11	3

	clever Gibbons just love to sneak up on bananas 02/04/20 8:10:11	3

	Waaaah! I got my towel wet! 27/03/20 12:00:27	3

	"I'm sure I know you from somewhere." 26/02/20 8:03:37	1 3
Was it the underage stripper party? --Scrijjy Doo
	So you burned the turkey, the potatoes, the pigs in blankets - but the Brussels sprouts are perfectly cooked? 19/02/20 20:00:08	3

	I think the hidden numbers are 42. 14/01/20 12:00:17	3

	clever I keep telling her to shave her armpits. 06/01/20 8:06:03	3

	No, that's fine, there's no big black tattoo on her bum. 03/01/20 20:01:57	3

	Why does there have to be a Christmas tree even in my bathroom? 24/12/19 8:35:28	3