Medical breakthrough as three new antibiotics discovered in Hull

01/03/23 13:10:51, edited: 01/03/23 13:11:30

Scary Spice

22/02/23 21:24:47

lol

There was nothing Dave enjoyed more than launching an unprovoked mortar attack on an unsuspecting neighbour.

01/12/22 13:17:31

clever

"...and the vet said it's probably tinnitus."

23/10/22 8:26:39

...and the winning Pumpkins in the 'carve-a-celebrity' competition go to David Dickinson and Katie Price.

21/10/22 21:04:51

Mercedes Bendz

10/04/24 12:23:09

"Fucking hell, I'm going bald already!"

09/02/24 12:01:14

"Stop complaining, your mum said I wasn't to get your shoes muddy."

19/01/24 20:12:27

"It's days like this I wish I hadn't gone into plumbing."

18/01/24 20:02:03, edited: 19/01/24 10:54:28, suggested edits

Whinny Bay Go!

03/01/24 8:36:20

"Just a couple more hours Miss Winslet and we'll be ready to go."

27/11/23 8:18:45

Park Drench

02/09/23 22:19:59

"...and as we move into February..."

29/08/23 8:10:47

"I wish she'd stop flashing her tits."

21/08/23 8:10:42

"Remember that little two seater we used to have Mavis before the 128 kids came along?"

15/08/23 8:13:50

"Just the 2,500 coming round tonight."

11/08/23 20:05:40

She literally waited on him hand and foot.

29/06/23 8:08:53

"No, course I haven't left the handbrake on. Do you think I'm an idiot?"

14/05/23 8:02:45

Frantic scenes at Glasgow Central as charity collectors spotted approaching platform.

16/02/23 20:11:19

clever

Dave had no idea how the cub had got stuck to the window, and even less idea how to remove it.

12/02/23 20:08:01

Lad-in-der Field

06/11/22 13:06:12

lol

The works outing had been fun and the mill owner promised that if everyone worked really hard, he might start the engine next year.

12/10/22 20:17:22

Dave laughed as he took the photograph. Three seconds later, he was finding it less funny when his moped wouldn't start.

21/02/24 8:06:05

To have and to hold...

27/12/23 20:00:58

Meals on Wheels

20/12/23 20:03:00

As systems go for lighting your own farts, it was complex.

13/12/23 8:08:18

"Alright mate, take off your watch and any jewellery and walk straight through."

28/10/23 8:44:39

"Anyway, enough about my hair...are you buying the couch or not?"

27/10/23 12:41:52

"If we go through another speed camera I want to look my best."

12/10/23 8:10:48

The 'Hot chicks on motorbikes' link wasn't what Dave was expecting.

28/06/23 8:14:49

"I'm sweating me nads off here lads, and then in December they'll have us doing the swimsuit stuff."

24/06/23 8:32:48

If at first you don't succeed...

25/05/23 9:53:18

His bark is worse than his bite.

20/05/23 8:02:47

"It's okay, it's okay...it's only the ginger one."

10/05/23 20:01:54

Quarter Pounder With Keys.

23/03/23 20:00:17

"Bounce now, yer bastard!"

22/03/23 8:02:05

Trials of novelty monorail get underway on M1.

21/03/23 8:02:08

“Oh alright then, THEY is a knob.”

02/02/23 20:00:29

My Scare Lady

17/12/22 8:26:45

Clark Went

01/12/22 8:11:02

Dave had been putting off defrosting the freezer, but the time had come.

13/11/22 10:02:09

“Well, the good news is there’s no need to rake up the clippings…”

09/11/22 20:00:16

The Naked Butler turned out to be a bit of a disappointment.

03/11/22 20:26:25

The party at Wayne Rooney's house was in full swing.

30/10/22 20:20:57

If Citroen designed kitchens.

10/04/24 8:12:59

"On the plus side, I don't think we're going to need the suppository."

07/04/24 20:03:18

"The dog in space thing has been done."

09/03/24 8:05:41

Thunberg has epiphany after realising global warming will mean you can grow grapes in Sweden.

20/02/24 8:03:42

Pan Am

06/01/24 20:03:18

"Don't think this is a good idea Dave."
"Why, because I'm not wearing any trunks?"
"No, because the tide's out."

25/11/23 9:26:52

"It's life Jim, but not as we know it."

18/11/23 20:03:58

"Great, it will go with my World Trade Centre novelty candles."

01/11/23 20:05:47

"Yes, I did tell you to brush your teeth but I think you've got the wrong end of the stick."

29/10/23 20:24:34

"Okay they're a nice colour but when are you going to wear them?"

19/08/23 8:07:01

The Tour De Ireland was a very different cycle race.

24/07/23 9:26:20

lol

"What do you think of it so far?"

03/07/23 12:07:23

“Your call is important to us…”

27/03/23 20:00:16

It could have been a beautiful moment, but was ruined by the raucous laughter of some nearby humans.

04/03/23 8:06:16

“For Christ’s sake Reg, a mouse isn’t going to hurt you!”

26/02/23 20:01:48

“Bad news…I couldn’t get us any tickets for the Cliff Richard gig.”

13/02/23 12:00:58

RSPCA called after man spotted cleaning patio window with Tiger.

13/02/23 8:02:03

Don't you just hate it when a waiter resigns half way through a shift?

07/02/23 20:06:44

'Now about your x-rays…’

18/11/22 8:02:44

Just off camera, two Bloodhounds by the names of Phil and Holly were sneaking to the front of the queue.

11/11/22 8:22:21

"Shall we tell her about the shovel?"

29/03/24 12:02:41

"I don't mind going into business with you but I still think Chicken & Squirrel is a crap name for a pub."

07/03/24 8:13:35

Customers who bought this also liked the chocolate teapot.

29/02/24 8:10:34

"Maureen!!! Can you check the dose on those laxatives again for me?"

26/02/24 12:02:19

"Yeah, you can't miss it. It's the one with the blue curtains."

01/12/23 8:45:02

Brain dead

08/11/23 8:01:42

Taking the plunge

29/09/23 20:01:27

Turdish Airlines

04/09/23 20:06:17

"Have you got anything with a centre parting?"

02/09/23 12:17:28

Catch Of The Day

29/08/23 12:22:16

He didn't know whether it was the mercury nudging thirty or the tantalising glimpse of Margaret's right buttock, but Fred felt the urge to loosen his tie.

30/07/23 8:49:17

"I don't like all this cutie-cutie shit either Reg, but it's better than being served up with mint sauce."

09/07/23 20:07:41

lol

Dave loved to simulate snorkeling in the bath. His Goldfish were less keen.

23/06/23 12:04:47

"Why have you just sent me a picture of your food?"

03/05/23 8:02:03

Most bizarre thing about this photo is that car door reflection reveals it was taken by a cat.

11/04/23 11:10:32

"I know this looks dangerous...but she says she's got a driving licence."

11/04/23 8:40:51

Mark Zuckerberg learned a lot from his early money making schemes

08/04/23 8:05:23

"Well the good news Captain, is that we've avoided a shit-load of docking fees."

27/02/23 12:32:54

"Remember the good old days Reg, before they started integrating aerials into windscreens?"

17/02/23 12:16:04, edited: 17/02/23 12:47:14

...but corner shop still open.

01/02/23 8:10:51

Cat Boy Slim

30/01/23 20:16:52

It was either these or the Super Mario burgers and they looked a bit fatty.

16/01/23 8:28:50

Dave had taken it too far again, but it isn't every day your daughter turns four.

06/12/22 8:11:29

“Have you taken the shuttle from Heathrow to Manchester before madam?”

26/11/22 8:18:30

"Are you sure this is the best way to teach Physics, Mr Thomas?"

02/04/24 12:16:26

clever

Dave was one of the few method actors doing panto.

28/03/24 8:13:38

"So that's what Uhura's been doing on her days off!"

12/03/24 12:11:23, edited: 13/03/24 0:23:31

Concerns grow that 'bring your pet to work day' may have gone too far.

28/02/24 8:08:12

This is not as brave as it looks. Dave has massive hands and it was a very tiny bear.

21/02/24 8:08:34

The moment you wish you'd paid a bit more for your jumper.

06/02/24 12:56:10, edited: 06/02/24 14:25:12

"I'm not coming out there, I'll thaw to death."

26/01/24 8:33:11

lol

🎵 Harry, I'm not your daddy🎵

04/01/24 8:31:08

The Vlad Hatters Tea Party

17/12/23 20:03:24

Pensioner accused of stealing 100cwt of Bananas, says police plantained the evidence.

11/12/23 8:10:12

No entry sign

02/12/23 12:03:32

Cowavan

30/11/23 20:01:39