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Vivvy En Vote score: 10708Vivvy En

"It's octuplets again, Mrs Petrov."

18/11/22 8:00:12

Al Overy Vote score: 14137Al Overy

"Tell me doctor, what did the scan show?"

"Hmm... Can you drive a minibus?"

18/11/22 8:03:34

John Harrison Vote score: 928John Harrison

'Now about your x-rays…’

18/11/22 8:02:44

KT A Vote score: 2092KT A

I know I'm on the large side, Doctor, but I feel like there's a thin person inside me that's trying to get out.

18/11/22 8:00:10

Mark Cowling Vote score: 1500Mark Cowling

"I'm afraid it's the big W, Mrs Stroganoff. You have wood worm."

18/11/22 9:35:24

James Lennox Vote score: 12568James Lennox

"You're pregnant. And your foetus is pregnant. And your foetus's foetus is pregnant. And your foetus's foetus's foetus is pregnant..."

18/11/22 8:00:34

The Wolf Vote score: 16637The Wolf

You can tell these are dolls. You'd never get to see a doctor face to face in real life.

18/11/22 8:00:09, edited: 18/11/22 8:10:01

Dave Bryan Vote score: 23567Dave Bryan

''What makes you think you're a captioneer?''

''I keep repeating myself.''

18/11/22 8:23:19

I'd be careful with this caption, it might get repeated next week --Glyn Evans
Mr Dome  Vote score: 14753Mr Dome


- Well doctor I keep hearing voices in my head
- And what are they saying
- я очень ненавижу анона

18/11/22 8:13:24

John Harrison Vote score: 928John Harrison

“Just so I’m clear…you’ve got just ONE lot of health insurance?”

18/11/22 8:01:28

Al Overy Vote score: 14137Al Overy

"A natural birth will be impossible, Mrs Doll. I've ordered a conjuror with a saw."

18/11/22 8:01:16

John Harrison Vote score: 928John Harrison

"I've seen the Psychiatric report and it says you're too full of yourself."

18/11/22 8:23:41

Al Overy Vote score: 14137Al Overy

"Listen, it doesn't matter if people think you're a splitter, it's what's inside you that counts."

18/11/22 8:01:47

John Harrison Vote score: 928John Harrison

"Good news...the surgeon has managed to fit you in every day next week and twice on saturday."

18/11/22 11:13:45, edited: 18/11/22 14:46:53

James Lennox Vote score: 12568James Lennox

"Look, I think you're pretty, but I can't handle the size discrepancy. If only there was a slightly smaller identical version of you."

18/11/22 8:09:57

The Wolf Vote score: 16637The Wolf

"I've been feeling really empty lately. Bloody Putin and his conscription."

18/11/22 8:05:38

Craig Eddsenior Vote score: 1964Craig Eddsenior

"So how do you feel within yourself?"

18/11/22 8:04:57

John Harrison Vote score: 928John Harrison

“I think you need something to bring you out of yourself a bit more.”

18/11/22 8:00:19

Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 13864Neil Mackenzie

So the youngest is called Olga and all the other sisters are called Michelle.

18/11/22 18:33:18

Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 1259Ellen Duncalf

"In order to work for the NHS you will need to be able to multitask. Will that be a problem?

Not at all, at all, at all, at all......

18/11/22 9:46:05

tony kelly Vote score: 1522tony kelly

''No, you're not pregnant, Mrs. Zelensky, but the scan does show a large amount of FTX cash in dollar bills...''

18/11/22 9:44:26

Tony S Vote score: 6130Tony S

"What shall I do with the Russian Doll we got sent from Moscow?"
"Just put it with the Trojan horse , what hard can it do."

18/11/22 9:43:26

Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 1259Ellen Duncalf

"I'm sorry to tell you that it's Multi-personality Disorder. Do you all understand the implications?"

18/11/22 9:39:58

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 18819Vanessa the Guesser

"I'm afraid Ms Sharapova there are some serious consequences from your girls' weekend away in Prague and you'll be getting a hefty bill."

"Will you take a Czech?"

18/11/22 8:13:50

Ian Skelding Vote score: 29474Ian Skelding

“I’m afraid we haven’t got sixteen prosthetic limbs”

18/11/22 8:10:25

Nigel Marshall Vote score: 704Nigel Marshall

‘You need to rest and slow down after birth’
…I can’t I’m always Russian and round

18/11/22 8:07:28

Stephen Bean Vote score: 27034Stephen Bean

Doctor Doll-little

18/11/22 8:00:14

Dave Bryan Vote score: 23567Dave Bryan

Call The Midwives

18/11/22 8:00:11, edited: 18/11/22 8:15:15

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