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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	36	10	3	#14	16	10	#27	1962	2706	#65
Photos			1	#7	1	13	#5	248	987	#5
Comments	6	1	1	#8				16	37	#81
Suggested Edits	2

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions	11	#8	20	#22	2366	#77
Photos			11	#7	1033	#18
Comments					37	#65
Suggested Edits	1	#2			3	#11

captions comments received captioned photos

captions


lol x3 13/07/23 8:11:00		24 35
Very well done, Phil! Yours was the crem of the crop. Congratulations on your win. --Al Overy

lol 09/11/23 12:08:28, edited: 15/03/24 18:18:14, suggested edits		24 30
Well done Phil - great caption! How was the date? --Mr Dome
	lol x3 The Post Code Lottery found a new way to tell entrants they hadn't won 26/09/23 8:10:31	27

	lol “I think my waters have broken “ said Mrs Gulliver 01/11/23 8:07:39	26

	lol Dave was determined to get his money's worth at the Build a Bear shop. 11/01/24 20:03:04, edited: 11/01/24 20:08:37, suggested edits	1 22
I've left a bit of a pedantic edit suggestion Cap Auth. Feel free to ignore. --James Lennox
	lol Unfortunately for Davina the pin the donkey game had not gone well 23/12/23 8:10:01	21

	clever x2 “They said they couldn’t do me a 99 but could do a 57” said Dave 28/10/23 20:11:26	1 21

	Going down the slide was a near death experience 01/05/23 12:06:38	20

	A pooh dunnit murder mystery 22/03/23 8:04:13	20

	lol creative "This is great I must come back and do this in the summer" said Dave 03/05/24 8:05:49, edited: 03/05/24 8:06:11	1 19

	"You do realise it's rude to point" 27/09/23 8:09:54	19

	Dave regretted calling the stripper ad in the phone box 28/08/23 8:31:03	19

	lol Chris Beach announces venue for the Dave Awards Ceremony 19/10/23 8:08:45	7 18
Apologies to Vanessa, Vivvy, KT A, Karen, Dot, Catherine, Julia, Karen, Karen, Karyn, Kathleen, Mandy, Valerie, Alexandra, and Jo in having to party in a gents' toilet --Mr Dome
	lol “You know granny wants to see you “ 24/09/23 8:05:10	18

	"Have you made any plans for Christmas yet?" 17/09/23 12:01:12	18

	clever "Quick we need to get across the border before Trump is elected" 06/03/24 8:08:06	2 17
Mexico will be a better place to live if he is. --Barrie Bullock
	creative "They had run out of Christmas trees" said Dave 11/12/23 8:28:24	17

	“Was the Police all you could think of for something blue” 15/09/23 12:08:53	1 17
She blue it. --Willie Johnson
	“Hmm she is a captioneer and my name is Dave this is not going to end well “ 09/09/23 20:06:58	1 17

	Dave liked to start easy with his ransom demands 03/09/23 20:02:50, edited: 03/09/23 20:03:09	16

	Dave knew he would find a way to enjoy the James Blunt concert with his girlfriend 13/06/23 8:10:10	16

	"I told you we would get a carriage to ourselves" said Sally 05/03/24 8:11:41	15

	creative Edward always won 04/01/24 20:05:02	1 15

	" Okay I have removed the c,a,p,t keys just the i,o,n,.,m and e to go. Hopefully you should then get your life back " 09/11/23 8:10:17	1 15
"No! No! otherwise without it I might realise that I had no life beforehand. I couldn't survive without top.cinema" --Glyn Evans
	“Of course it’s my anus and can you stop groping it “ said Sally 16/01/24 12:02:30	14

	lol “Joseph can you please tell those 3 wise men to sod off” 25/12/23 12:10:41	14

	“Any update on when the plumber is coming to fix the toilet?” 25/07/23 12:41:53	14

	Meating place 21/07/23 8:03:54	14

	"You saw ME buying a cucumber that size" 03/03/23 8:03:06	13

	Men behaving balletly 25/04/24 8:00:58	12

	Bungle always felt a right tit being on Rainbow 28/02/24 12:15:21	3 12
That's a left tit, just sayin'. --Karen McDonald
	Bloody hell 25p for The Sun 19/02/24 20:03:43	12

	"I think I may have crabs" said Sue "it's a lot worse than that" said sally 06/02/24 8:03:15, edited: 06/02/24 8:03:33	12

	Kay FC 12/01/24 8:03:00	12

	Barnsley 2040 30/11/23 12:01:23	12

	Dave always attracted the clingy types 04/11/23 20:09:14	12

	Doctor said it’s a repetitive strain injury 13/10/23 12:00:53	12

	Even the dogs realised you only needed to dress your top half when on zoom meetings 27/05/23 8:18:55	12

	Aristocat 22/05/23 8:03:34	12

	lol Mittens was ready to deal with the Tory local election literature coming through the door 09/04/23 8:18:38	12

	Snappy dresser 14/01/24 20:07:36	11

	Full bodied red wine 21/12/23 12:02:47	11

	Dave never was any good at hide and seek 26/08/23 12:02:31	11

	Dave could not understand the big deal about money laundering 15/07/23 8:04:37	11

	The fabric shop had said the cloth was end of line but Claire didn't realise they meant Jubilee Line 13/05/23 8:05:20	11

	Turns out Jan only wanted the matching t-shirt back 11/03/23 8:05:56	11

	"I think the cat knows we are off to Mexico and wants to come with us " said Dave 06/03/24 8:23:40	10

	"I spent too much time scratching my head as to where to go on holiday " said Dave 24/01/24 8:11:19	10

	Cast of has beans 07/01/24 20:01:08	10

	Beesy Rider 03/12/23 12:03:54	10

	Costs an arm and a leg 04/10/23 12:03:26	10

	lol Dave couldn’t fully commit to being in a ZZ Top tribute band 09/09/23 12:49:22	10

	“Granny why are there no earlier family pictures on your sideboard?” 22/07/23 12:12:10, edited: 22/07/23 12:12:34	10

	EasyJet are now offering seats for those customers suffering from claustrophobia 14/07/23 12:08:23	10

	"The person who uses the last dish needs to do all the washing up" 30/05/23 17:00:58, edited: 30/05/23 17:04:25	10

	"What you left your phone at home some date this is going to be" 03/05/23 8:02:24	10

	Should have gone to pecsavers 23/04/23 8:21:56, edited: 23/04/23 8:22:36	10

	Dave was feeling a bit sluggish 02/05/24 8:04:43, edited: 02/05/24 8:04:57	9

	"Alas poor Yorick. That gives me an idea I must get back to the typewriter" 23/04/24 12:02:10, edited: 23/04/24 12:04:05	9

	"I'm flattered but you know I'm older than 16" 06/01/24 8:06:11	9

	“Sorry but the baby sitter cancelled at the last minute “ 05/01/24 20:03:17, suggested edits	9

	"Do you think I need to call the AA" "Perhaps I do need to sober up first" 10/11/23 20:04:22	9

	"What do you think?" "I think it's called an engine" 10/11/23 20:01:04	9

	"You know we don't put the heating on till 1 October" 19/08/23 8:06:35	9

	The Costa interview process was pretty intense 28/07/23 20:02:51	9

	"And don't leave the toilet seat up again next time" 16/05/23 12:39:20	9

	“Have you got all those stains out the bath yet?” said Dave 31/03/24 8:01:46, edited: 31/03/24 8:02:03	8

	"I will let you out when you can tell me exactly how to use the Suggested Edit, Nod and Finder on the caption.me site" 30/01/24 8:12:13	8

	"I knew mowing the lawn set off your hayfever so I bought you this" said Dave 21/01/24 8:01:18	8

	"What sort of soup is it?" "It's a family recipe" 30/12/23 8:02:23	8

	“Must be attracted to the apple shampoo and conditioner you used” said Dave 14/11/23 8:05:55	8

	"Luke you know I said I was your father, well..." 07/11/23 8:14:25	8

	"keep running there's an American XL bully dog chasing us" 29/09/23 8:08:23	8

	🎵 A message to you,Rudy 🎵 27/09/23 8:08:17	8

	In years gone by capioneers were treated like witches and metal helmets were attached to their heads stop the captions from flowing out. 25/09/23 8:11:45	5 8
Why do you think cats are so popular on caption.me? --Glyn Evans
	"This tastes like shit you would feed prisoners" "Better get used to it then sir" 17/06/23 20:07:42	8

	lol "Sorry my Teams camera seems to be playing up, but I'm still here" 06/06/23 12:33:55, edited: 06/06/23 12:34:19	8

	lol "Okay why is my gun shooting penises" 16/05/23 20:25:45	1 8
Because its assembly was cocked up. --John Glover
	"I specifically said NO PINEAPPLE" 05/04/23 12:42:57	8

	When car clamping firms run out of clamps 01/04/23 9:30:40	8

	Chilli dogs 21/03/23 20:08:49	8

	Polecat 22/04/24 20:01:26	7

	“How much do you regret not living in Britain “ 18/04/24 8:02:42	7

	“So Dave why did the nursery sack you this time?” 08/04/24 12:24:53	7

	Elon Husky 09/03/24 8:02:29	7

	“Okay choose an exit any exit but don’t tell me” said Magician Dave 15/02/24 20:13:22, edited: 15/02/24 20:13:35	7

	Chair Person 13/02/24 8:01:28	7

	Another cool Apple product 07/02/24 8:06:01	7

	Fortunately the pictures with 3 donuts got censored 02/02/24 12:07:12	7

	clever Kevin hated going into makeup before making each Aldi Christmas advert 12/01/24 12:04:33	1 7
Love this caption and should’ve given it a super vote…. Well I’m going to anyway. --Karen Oakenfull
	"Nice ass" 23/12/23 8:01:53	7

	Dave found there was usually enough hay fever sufferers in a carriage to guarantee him a seat. 26/11/23 8:32:44	7

	Breakfast in America 07/10/23 12:05:41	7

	It comes with a stigma attached 25/09/23 12:11:07	7

	Review 1 Star “You are shut in a mesh cage guarded by Eminem and some pigeons “ 19/09/23 13:50:02	1 7
Some people are never going to be happy 🙄 --Glyn Evans
	Conservatives election leaflet for 2024 leaked 13/09/23 20:06:42	7

	Even when abroad Dave had an alarm and laptop ready at 8.00,12.00 and 20.00 GMT 04/09/23 12:39:17	7

	“I would give it 20 minutes if I were you” 18/08/23 20:56:42	7

	Charlie Dimmock's Garden Rescue team were about to meet their biggest challenge yet 24/05/23 20:20:14	7

	Holly Willoughby waving goodbye to Phillip Schofield 20/05/23 20:10:14	7

more captions

last comments (total: 110)

Brilliant caption Phil, well done and I'm so sorry I missed voting for it 🙏

Dot Old

01/12/23
7:55am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Swan in a million, congratulations!

Did you reply to Davina? If you did, would it be preferable if I said Swan with a million? 🤗

Glyn Evans

01/12/23
8:00am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

It could be you! Oh, wait a minute, it is you. Well done Phil. Great caption.

John Harrison

01/12/23
8:14am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Thanks a lot for all your kind messages and Davina and I are off to the Maldives for Christmas!!!!!!!!!
Thanks a lot for being such a great site I have really enjoyed my first year here following the trial and tribulations of Dave.
Phil

(caption author)

01/12/23
8:26am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Many congratulations, Phil. Two excellent captions. Sorry I missed the vote.

Dave Bryan

01/12/23
8:39am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Congratulations Phil, a hilarious and deserving winner!

Stephen Bean

01/12/23
8:46am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Another money winner,another great caption. You can afford to buy a scratch card now.

John Glover

01/12/23
11:00am

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Congratulations, Phil! Brilliant caption!

:^)

Crunchy

Crunchy Chords

01/12/23
4:23pm

comment on caption:
After years of no dates Davina decided to change her Tinder photo [Phil Swan]

Congratulations, Mr. Swan... your caption was very amusing, and a perfect fit for the picture.
(Sorry for being so late... I had to wait for more caption quota.)

Kathleen Ralph