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Paul Reeve

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creative

He got fed up with just fetching balls.

28/02/19 12:51:44

"Watch out Dave, the coppers are behind you."

07/07/20 20:23:39

After eating a whole group of monkeys, Susan washed the feast down with a few beers.

28/10/19 20:13:45

The girls were on a site seeing tour.

13/08/14 20:00:15

Spongebob knew that getting home from the pub this late meant one thing, the wife was going to wipe the floor with him.

09/08/20 20:14:51

The Gee Gees

28/04/20 8:03:15

You whinny again --Vanessa the Guesser

creative

"It's incredible really, I only planted the bulb 3 weeks ago."

08/10/17 11:05:24

lol

clever

Eventually all the tyres went down and Dave ended up with a block of flats.

13/10/16 12:00:20

Smokey and the one armed bandit.

05/10/14 20:05:19

"Have you noticed that there hasn't been a single car go through the safari park for a month or so?"
"Yeah it's weird, we can't even do any window shopping."

24/04/20 8:44:06

lol

Cut the shit.

27/03/20 8:00:55

Nice. --Scrijjy Doo

It was just Emily's luck to pick the horse on the carousel with loose nuts and bolts.

10/12/17 13:11:19

"Yeah my new camera is fantastic it's even got knight vision on it."

02/07/14 20:12:42

Foam alone.

14/02/13 8:51:31

Orville and Dean

08/03/14 13:17:23

lol

"Stop crying you big baby, i said how much to paint my front door and you said Â£50 so we shook on it".

28/01/13 20:01:35

Thanks Gents. --Paul Reeve

Staff at the home encouraged Ethel to smoke because it helped to disguise the smell of piss.

11/01/13 20:32:27

Being a naughty Teddy, this wasn't the first time that he'd had a clip round the ear.

04/05/20 12:01:37

Goes well with a coffee table.

26/09/18 16:06:30

clever x2

Bloody hell lady, look what you've done to my skull."

27/08/18 14:23:16

lol

creative

As hard as he tried Dave just couldn't cover up the fact that he was drunk as he went through customs.

13/08/17 9:43:53

Just the chuckle I needed this morning - thanks! --Pussy Galore

Captions are a bit like a box of chocolates. If you don't get in early then normally all the best ones are gone.

03/11/19 20:42:26

Captions are a bit like a box of chocolates. They won't all be to your taste. --Dave Bryan

As the bin juice ran down Dave's leg, he paused and thought....fuck it why didn't I try harder at school.

12/10/19 13:06:59

Gripping the shaft with one hand and the helmet with the other, brought back distant memories for Edna.

19/08/19 20:50:03

Tom Selleck is looking rough around the edges these days.

06/07/19 13:24:57

Til deaf do us part.

08/05/19 14:08:57

"Mmmm that filled a hole."

01/09/16 12:16:32

Band On The Runs

30/03/16 20:14:33

Jimmy decided to have a go at the Pole Volt.

05/05/13 12:53:49

Not many Poles can toss the caber. --Ian Mclaren

Out of Action Man

29/04/13 20:14:29

Post Notel Depression.

24/04/13 8:19:57

"Quick Maureen this looks like a good deal, nip home and get our other kids".

31/01/13 8:10:53

Arnold Short-snigger

18/05/13 20:03:13

What is offensive about the word snigger? In the dictionary it explains it and it is not offensive. --Cath Jones

Julie was pleased with the shorts that Dave had got her for her birthday she just wished that he had nicked a pair with a smaller security tag on.

11/05/13 8:00:42

"No Mr Jenkins you put your keys in the fruit bowl and your snake comes out later."

27/03/13 12:00:17

The farmer hoped the Herbie-cides would solve the weed problem.

08/03/13 8:12:32

Smokey and the Bad-knits.

18/02/13 20:05:35

🎵 Thai a yellow fellow round the old Oak tree 🎵

06/02/13 12:00:13

A yellow nippon perhaps? --Guideaux

lol

"Hurry up love i've got some soup to fall into".

15/01/13 20:04:54

"That's great news mum that you managed to get some Turkey Dinosaurs and Alphabet Spaghetti for my dinner tonight, I've got to go now though , I've got a bank to manage."

08/05/20 10:47:33

Water Polo

01/11/14 12:00:30

WARNING... SLIPPERY FLOOR

25/04/19 9:16:49

Born into money.

05/08/18 20:13:38

Looks like it could kick off here.

23/06/18 12:40:13

Orckids

26/07/17 15:18:26

"Trust me honey we will get a sunbed today."

23/06/16 9:40:01

Sue was yet to master the rolling of a cigarette.

11/06/16 12:06:07

lol

Let's hope the next page isn't the honeymoon god knows what might pop up.

08/04/14 17:30:37

At these prices it's a snatch.

22/10/13 20:00:46

haha, brilliant! --Jade Prior

"I don't believe it this is the fifth Restaurant in a row that's got no Pizza they seem to be going down like Domino's."

10/10/13 20:00:14

After his mother died giving birth to him Neddy had to be hand reared.

07/07/13 11:23:53

"It's so fast it scares the crap out of me going round the bends."

02/06/13 12:10:32

This was the scene of a drive by muting.

02/04/13 12:11:50

They haven't got a Pot to Piss in.

18/03/13 12:02:51

That explains why they always piss up their savings. --Tosser Wivlov

All hands on Beck.

13/03/13 20:00:53

lol

"Dad i'm scared, there's a Bouncey Castle following us."

02/03/13 15:49:31

After plucking up the courage to come out of the closet Peter decided to put his lipstick on.

06/12/12 9:50:12

clever

Coffee Mate

04/02/21 12:58:18

"Do you fancy a Shag?"
"No, I've only got eyes for you honey."

02/07/20 12:24:49

The humans round here are so lazy thought Tufty as he put the discarded slice of pizza into the bin.

31/05/20 12:07:59

Where do we know Tufty the squirrel from? Was he something to do with the Green Cross Code years back? ðŸ˜ --Karen Oakenfull

"Dave if you slip and end up in hospital paralysed, would you like me to take care of your wife's sexual needs?"

04/03/20 13:44:26

28/08/19 12:00:33

10/07/19 20:12:49

28/07/18 12:19:51

Burn the other cheek.

14/09/16 12:09:01

Heavy Petting.

10/09/15 13:13:31

"Concentrate lads we don't want to go over the Handel bars again."

31/12/14 14:53:42

Dolly Mixtures

01/12/14 20:07:40

Whores drawn carriage.

22/10/14 20:08:57

Stay tuned for the next gripping episode.

05/09/14 12:04:21

"I'm thinking that you are still looking at my tits."

03/07/14 20:08:39

just noticed the box. --Steve Davies

Dave always stopped for something to eat at quarter to three.

18/05/14 9:50:38

Tom was caught trying to steal a tree and was given a long stretch.

24/11/13 12:04:44

Caught by Special Branch? --Chris Halliwell

🎵🎵Oh I dalek to be beside the seaside.
Oh I dalek to be beside the sea.

09/10/13 8:06:16

Riding bareback was not good for his bullocks.

12/07/13 12:59:38

Seems plenty different to me. And this one is funny, in my humble opinion. --Tracy Davidson

Postman Pat was just about to get fired.

10/06/13 8:04:31

Tufty had been enjoying Fursday and hadn't expected Fryday to come so quick.

23/05/13 15:11:54

Can't wait till chewsday. --John Glover

When teased about his weight Tubby would grin and bare it.

23/04/13 20:00:09

Ugly duckring.

25/03/13 8:40:28

Not sung by Mike Reid I hope? Maybe Jonathan Ross ... --Gordon Bannerman

Antique road show.

30/09/14 12:08:14

"After reports from residents of someone looking through the windows Police have said they are looking for a peeping Tom."

04/06/13 20:15:47

"I find the public toilets here a little too public don't you Dave?"

24/04/13 12:17:18

"I really appreciate you taking me to Paris for a romantic break Dave, I just wish that our view of the city hadn't been spoilt by that great big pylon."

17/01/21 10:30:08

You'd think with all the high speed internet, they could finally take down that hideous radio tower. --Mauris Iocus

clever

"Tiddles,Tiddles, wake up darling, you're having a nightmare."

20/08/20 20:00:15

Dave wasn't going to be caught out by the trick or treaters again this year. He had prepared an exploding pumpkin full of cat shit to get his own back on the little blighters.

27/10/19 21:45:10

I go there for my anal holiday.

21/10/19 9:43:05

"Dave, are you sure that your mother has knitted jumpers before?"

02/07/19 20:49:14

His cousin smokes spliffs, he's a grass snake.

31/10/18 0:45:46

"Bloody hell, trust Attenborough to turn up when I'm just about to take a shit."

23/12/17 8:09:43

Dave was just about to drop a bollock.

20/10/16 20:32:52

creative x3

Gran shows off her drop kicking skills by booting young Sean straight onto the back of the quad bike.

24/08/16 8:29:27

A boot in the nuts is always painful.

08/08/16 12:26:22

"Just don't pull your finger out Dave until we reach the toilets."

08/06/16 12:13:37

creative

"And make sure the lid is on the biscuit jar Dave you know what that bloody cat is like."

16/02/16 20:13:18

It had taken ages but Dave had finally managed to shoe all the Pigeons away.

07/02/16 8:39:27

Sorry I didn't notice that one when I posted mine , maybe it's been edited if not I do apologise . --[anon]

Kicking up a stink.

10/11/15 20:50:23

Guantanamo Bay Window.

14/04/15 13:52:19

clever

X-Pat

09/04/15 12:06:06

It was a catch 22 situation, all 22 of them wanted to catch the ball.

Sun 12:43:39

Passing bamboo wasn't as easy as eating it.

05/07/20 20:10:54

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last comments (total: 147)

That's show business!

Scrijjy Doo

03/05/20
11:23pm

comment on caption:
On the plus side deep sea cameraman Dave's beard had helped him blend in with marine life when filming. But on the downside Dave had been face f@cked by randy octopus over twenty five times. [Paul Reeve]

Where do we know Tufty the squirrel from? Was he something to do with the Green Cross Code years back? ðŸ˜

Karen Oakenfull

01/06/20
3:16am

comment on caption:
The humans round here are so lazy thought Tufty as he put the discarded slice of pizza into the bin. [Paul Reeve]

yes Karen ðŸ˜Š

(caption author)

01/06/20
9:59am

comment on caption:
The humans round here are so lazy thought Tufty as he put the discarded slice of pizza into the bin. [Paul Reeve]

He's known locally as the Old Grey Whistleblower.

Karyn Harrison

03/06/20
12:12pm

comment on caption:
"Don't worry I won't tell a soul what I've seen, you know me, I can keep a secret." [Paul Reeve]

would've?

[anon]

06/07/20
10:00pm

comment on caption:
Damn thought Susan, if there had ever been a good time to be doing a handstand, it would have been now. [Paul Reeve]

Corrected, ty

(caption author)

06/07/20
10:25pm

comment on caption:
Damn thought Susan, if there had ever been a good time to be doing a handstand, it would have been now. [Paul Reeve]

Giraffe would have been playing a game: "How long can you hold that handstand?"

Willie Johnson

07/07/20
8:48am

comment on caption:
Damn thought Susan, if there had ever been a good time to be doing a handstand, it would have been now. [Paul Reeve]

Fair's fair

Glyn Evans

23/09/20
9:30pm

comment on caption:
Sally's argument was that if Dave expected her to take it up the rear, then it was only fair that he try it too. [Paul Reeve]

You'd think with all the high speed internet, they could finally take down that hideous radio tower.

Mauris Iocus

17/01/21
9:09pm

comment on caption:
"I really appreciate you taking me to Paris for a romantic break Dave, I just wish that our view of the city hadn't been spoilt by that great big pylon." [Paul Reeve]

Pro Wrestling used to be a lot more... inclusive.

Mauris Iocus

14/02/21
6:19pm

comment on caption:
When your in need of a super hero, just pray that Short Stubby Finger Man doesn't come to your rescue. [Paul Reeve]

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Paul Reeve

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