Irritable Owl Syndrome

23/10/18 12:00:17

Gang, nan style

13/08/18 12:00:24

Winston Churchill: The Official Otterbiography

18/07/18 20:40:19

lol clever

"...and that's how babies are born."

26/06/18 13:55:12

lol

Empirical evidence that obesity is in the jeans.

06/03/18 22:15:44

lol

"I love it when a dam comes together."

18/07/18 20:39:01

clever

Meowl

29/01/18 12:01:34

Mister Tibbs, the neighbour's cat, was happy that the Smith's had finally installed the new vending machine.

18/06/18 12:02:53

lol

"The closer it gets, the more it looks like a piano."

17/05/18 8:24:50

It ain't over till the fat lady...ok, it's over!

24/10/17 12:00:53

Hot Fuzz

10/07/18 20:03:24

Eating bland mushy food, taking regular naps and farting without shame. It's easy for two people to bond when they have so much in common.

19/12/17 13:53:22

Beverly Heels Cop

24/09/17 12:00:43

Million Dollar Baby

05/08/18 20:05:16

The steaks have never been higher.

19/05/18 12:08:38

I tawt I taw a pussy tatt.

11/02/18 8:08:10

A fresh pot of Stu

06/11/17 8:00:21

Yew warm enough?

13/10/19 20:09:48

Be careful of quick fix diets. They leave you feeling drained.

16/08/18 12:02:33

A book fell on my head. I've only got my shelf to blame.

30/06/18 8:16:09

clever

Tank top

06/01/18 12:00:18

It was Dot's first vacation in years. Looking for something outdoorsy, she Googled "nearest camp site".

06/05/19 10:32:01

Jurassic Pork

30/12/18 13:03:41

♬ Joe lean
Joe lean
Joe lean
Joe leeeeean... ♬

25/06/18 20:21:13

clever

Canoe fix it?

06/05/18 20:01:25

Hot cross bunnies

01/04/18 20:00:32

creative

For sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

22/12/17 20:17:11

And the epitaph read: "Well...T-t-t-that's all, folks!"

13/05/19 20:03:40

Mona Geezer

22/08/18 20:06:07

Pictured during his 2018 World Tour, the rock & roll lifestyle is clearly taking its toll on Harry Styles.

24/06/18 8:28:49

Junk food

10/06/18 8:00:07

Laurel and tardy

08/06/18 21:40:01

Cheekbone

07/01/18 12:00:22

We likes it human style.

06/12/17 12:00:21

Day 5: The shower siege stand-off continues. Body odour has now ripened to a notable lingering pungency.

----------
(Edit 03/11/18 14:22)

Day 5: The shower siege stand-off continues. I smell like the back end of a dog on laxatives, but I'm hanging in there.

24/10/17 8:02:12

Post-op images from Porky Pig's transition to Miss Piggy

15/09/19 12:05:20

"Look at those puppies."

01/10/18 12:01:02

Cops & Whoppers

06/08/18 8:20:13

"...and the BAFTA for Best Male Dramatic Performance goes to..."

31/03/18 20:29:51

Wears stripes because he doesn't want to be spotted.

06/02/18 8:00:52

Stretch Mark

07/01/18 20:00:06

lol

The headless one is yours, mate!

20/10/17 20:37:16

The Lie-in King

(nod to 8:03:53)

04/10/17 8:20:42

Tom was starting to regret agreeing to babysit for Jerry

Nod to 12:07:50

03/05/19 13:29:15

Deerly departed

14/04/19 8:12:28

The Old Bill-a-bong

18/10/18 12:31:33

Fedoras you can wear with Pride.

19/06/18 20:03:02

John was recently diagnosed with colour blindness. It came totally out of the purple.

13/06/18 20:12:55

"Flock off!"

01/02/18 20:03:55

...and a 99 with a sausage, please.

22/11/17 20:05:27

Even when he's feeling down, Joe always puts on a happy face.

18/11/17 14:37:05

clever

"Latest reports have revealed that a wolf has been apprehended in connection with the incident. As for the condition of the inhabitants - identified locally as three little pigs - they have been rescued and are said to be shaken but unharmed."

11/02/19 20:02:42

Mr. Potato Head was beginning to have doubts that he's the father.

17/06/18 8:03:47

You look familiar. Have I probed you before?

31/01/18 8:00:31

clever

Hunny Monster

11/01/18 12:00:06

It's made of iron. It's a ferrous wheel.

30/12/17 8:32:07

Kevin got a little delayed on his way to his weekly Narcoleptics Anonymous meeting.

22/12/17 20:00:24

Another Rick in the wall

08/12/17 20:00:08

"Everyone keeps telling me I need to get Facebook. Do you by any chance have a copy of it in stock?"

30/06/18 8:13:20

"My precious! My precious!"

27/05/18 8:03:59

"Stop storking me or you'll egret it."

22/05/18 20:00:06

creative

"You're freaking meowt."

21/05/18 9:04:28

"Go ahead, I'm all ears."

20/05/18 12:02:45

The owl and the pussycat went to tea...

29/01/18 12:00:07

Take away his drum kit and his stash of Cadbury Dairy Milk, and he's bound to go apeshit.

22/01/18 8:00:26

Just taking precautions. My brother's friend's dad's neighbour has man flu.

11/01/18 20:00:47

Ann Widdecombe performs a one-off gig at at The Comedy Store.

09/01/18 20:03:02

Riding Nemo

06/01/18 9:32:36

clever

Ho-ho-holoha!

26/12/17 20:00:06

Cannibals can be quite creative with their food combinations

21/11/17 20:07:48

Mutual mastication

01/10/17 20:22:58

Jimmy Loos

30/09/19 20:00:07

Swipe LEFT

21/05/18 20:05:01

Dee, hydrating.

03/05/18 9:15:45

"No Gary, I don't want to play Cops & Rubbers."

30/04/18 13:01:41

Manifold

19/04/18 12:10:35

Amateur photography. A horrendous crime. People openly shoot others and chop the tops of their heads off.

06/04/18 20:01:49

Okay, that's snow problem...

13/02/18 20:00:23

An original corgi car

12/02/18 20:00:34

So THAT'S what MC Hammer was on about.

07/02/18 12:00:30

I once was lost, but now am found.

06/02/18 8:00:25

Cheetahs deserve each other.

02/02/18 12:00:22

Danger Mouse

07/01/18 8:43:08

Sporty Smurf

22/12/17 12:00:06

He's a bacon butty man

10/12/17 8:00:05

Rest in Pieces

09/12/17 8:00:07

Puppy Love

06/12/17 12:07:12

He's not at all stable, constantly up and down. I've tried to give him some guidance, but we just end up going around in circles.

29/11/17 12:15:48

That moment when you realise you got the dress code all wrong

09/11/17 20:19:58

Knickershocker Gloria

15/10/17 12:49:46

If you call me Frodo one more time, just ONE MORE TIME...

11/10/17 20:14:40

After recently adopting a rescue cat and having him neutered, Dave was elated to find this product, which he bought in an attempt to stave off the persistent revenge attacks every time he got out of the shower.

02/10/19 12:02:00

Reminds me of a girls night out in Essex

30/09/19 20:03:45

TOWIS (The Only Way Is Sussex)

27/08/19 8:23:39

*whispers* "Icy dead people"

nod to 20:00:07

30/04/19 21:10:21

Manor from heaven

22/03/19 20:33:31

"Life is crepe and then you die."

13/01/19 8:53:17

"You can count on me."

25/09/18 12:26:11

Wu-Tang Grans

13/08/18 12:07:31

Heir raising

26/06/18 13:53:35