'Next time I'm having a caesarian.'

05/09/12 12:54:25

The girls liked to dress up in period costumes.

13/12/12 8:39:38

Pete recoils in horror after finding one of Lenny Henrys pubes.

14/07/12 12:19:29

creative

Getting Noel ready for Deal or no Deal was getting more and more time consuming for the make up dept.

10/01/13 15:27:32

'You ruined the Beatles.'

29/11/12 8:33:26

Herbie's wife arrives to give evidence of domestic abuse.

12/06/12 22:58:04

creative

The Talitubbies proved most popular on Pakistan TV.

03/01/13 12:50:09

'Nope, even without the helmet you're still way over the weight limit.'

10/12/12 14:19:55

'Bloody Ikea',thought Kate. 'Where the hell is aisle 13?'

08/10/12 8:43:00

Fred West enjoys 10% off day at B&Q.

19/09/12 8:47:25

So this is where the Osmonds keep their teeth

12/04/12 21:41:02

'Bloody Lara Croft. I told her not to pull that lever.'

28/04/12 14:15:09

'And to think she said I fired blanks.'

17/01/13 8:53:16

'Christ that bird just shit on my head.'

26/11/12 14:40:50

'I'm sorry Joey, I'm a plastic surgeon not a miracle worker.'

25/04/12 13:19:12

Water birth for 5 stone baby proved the least painful method

10/01/13 15:28:50

'There'll be big tits over the white cliffs of Dover.'

22/11/12 14:54:54

'Room service Jimmy'.

18/11/12 12:41:59

Preparations were well under way for the new independent Scottish armed forces.

20/08/12 8:25:43

Osama Bin Knittin'

03/05/12 13:36:41

'What do you mean we're sitting on your mother?'

27/04/12 23:00:43

Paula Radcliffe denies taking performance enhancing drugs.

14/01/13 12:25:55

Costa Concordia captain loses deposit on Hoseasons holiday.

12/01/13 10:37:48

Hovis delivery boy admits to drink driving.

17/12/12 22:16:18

Marty Feldman memorial opens.

02/12/12 11:09:04

The Palestinian vs Israeli davies cup tie went pretty much as expected.

21/11/12 22:17:59

Sarah Beeney admits to post natal depression.

03/11/12 22:03:12

'What we have here gentlemen is a failure to communicate.'

30/10/12 13:49:12

'Sorry mate I can't help it if he's needed for sunday, he won't be ready 'til tuesday.'

18/10/12 22:13:59

Bollywood's musical version of Twilight opens to rave reviews.

08/09/12 10:01:02

The lone ranger practices giving Silver his 'special reward.'

06/09/12 13:44:11

Danny Boyle oversees Olympic opening ceremony rehearsals.

29/06/12 13:37:43

The new 'No more for you fatty' fridge device was proving a winner.

01/06/12 20:26:18

'That's got rid of Tony Robinson once and for all.'

23/05/12 14:24:42

'God preserve us.'

14/05/12 9:28:18

Bilbo Baggins ponders whether using Immac had been the best move.

20/04/12 16:39:48

Officer Lee was enjoying his new job for British immigration control.

03/02/13 10:17:43

Father Ted takes Jack out on his annual pilgrimage to Buckfast Abbey.

28/01/13 22:07:45

Joe was about to regret ordering a number 69 from the chinese.

22/01/13 9:50:47

Jonathan Ross' wife finally does what the public have been craving for years.

16/01/13 14:11:02

Checking luggage at Gatwick staff are amazed to find Princess Margarets dildo.

16/01/13 10:51:30

'Okay Blackbeard, hand them pieces of eight over'.

19/12/12 16:22:44

'Wake up and give me warp factor 5 Sulu unless you want a phaser up your arse.'

25/11/12 20:50:45

Uri Gellers wife storms out of the kitchen unable to do the sunday roast again.

10/11/12 11:55:22

As the used johnnys and turds floated gently in, Angelina couldn't help but think Southend wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

01/11/12 9:42:22

Victoria and David Beckham take first prize in the L.A Galaxy's annual fancy dress party.

20/10/12 21:55:54

'I'm not saying the missus is fat but she's got her own gravitational pull.'

22/08/12 9:57:50

Mount Rushmore revamp fails to impress traditionalists.

16/08/12 12:26:41

Cheeky girls reform for festival season.

27/07/12 11:57:08

Undercover cops at Kew gardens keep watch for suppliers of weed.

15/06/12 15:53:43