super vote: ( left this week)
30/10/16 16:18:47
"Let me see, Google , images , Medusa, ah shit.
25/10/15 20:20:14
Grandad can you pick gran up from the pub she's absolutely shit faced again .
14/10/16 14:40:57
"I thought you said you knew how to change a nappy".
16/11/14 14:59:04
Slip road.
15/10/16 12:20:58
What time is it? Oh about 5 mins to 10 of the top of my head.
25/07/14 19:02:12
Subtext.
08/12/15 15:44:29
Man-maid?
19/09/14 7:22:39
She could often be found in the beer garden enjoying a stiff brandy, who was taken into care some weeks later by the R.S.P.C.A.
07/09/14 20:41:54
Waiter I think this milk has gone sower.
23/09/12 11:52:20
Delays today were caused by Steve's on the line.
26/08/14 19:14:37
Where the streets have no drains.
21/08/14 13:42:37
Has anyone seen Dorothy's magic shoes? because Dorothy sure as hell cant.
28/06/14 19:35:17
"Finding nemo 3 is out soon"" I know I've seen the trailer".
25/11/15 21:30:22
Good high kick then a lovely follow through.
10/11/15 21:16:42
Typical bloody models always thinking they are the big ' I am'.
08/11/15 11:39:19
"How long have you been dragging that old dog around Stan"?"Hmmm let me see, well we got married in 1957".
03/11/15 1:31:23
They were in an on off relationship.
01/11/15 20:00:58
Police found the criminal 2 weeks later as fresh as the day he was caught.
30/10/15 12:47:48
"Do you deliver"?"Of course we do its over there by the kidneys".
02/10/15 11:59:40
Tights in white satin.
19/09/16 14:15:07
Ah yes this is our parent company .
26/11/15 12:14:55
NOW will you stop feeding the bloody seagulls?
11/11/15 11:33:10
"Do you often come this way"?"No I usually use the washing machine".
08/11/14 12:58:14
One hundred & eighty .
02/10/16 7:43:34
The shop was shut down 2 days later , it didn't have a licence to sell boos.
28/11/15 12:21:24
Tea chest.
12/11/15 20:03:38
Switching partners.
01/11/15 20:02:52
JC/DC
27/10/15 23:05:48
Police believe they are close to finding the stolen steamroller.
22/10/15 19:01:10
Snows patience had finally run out,Dopey had told the 7up joke for the last time.
22/08/14 11:27:31
Nothing looks worse than a bush sticking out of a skimpy pair of knickers.
27/06/14 14:00:27
Don't look back in anger.
04/10/14 10:30:35
Erik returned home victorious after a successful pillage of Bradford.
27/08/12 12:01:13
Jane wonders which poor bastard has her rucksack as she discovers shes been carrying a parachute for the last 10 miles.
03/11/16 19:30:51
'The long arm of the law' was not a phrase Dave wanted to hear before a rectal examination.
10/10/16 7:15:20
Since the report conditions at sports direct have improved dramatically.
06/10/16 19:16:20
When you said you're going to draw a giant cock on that wall I didn't think you could pull it off.
22/11/15 13:53:19
Feline groovy.
16/11/15 20:32:51
Wait 5 mins and slice of toast pops out of her cleavage .
12/11/15 20:20:29
No one was ever going to take away his liberty.
11/11/15 12:01:05
The strap on appliance Dave had bought came as a huge disappointment to his wife..
29/10/15 12:02:42
After spending £40 and getting six balls in a milk churn Dave finally walked away with a prize.
24/10/15 11:41:05
This truly was the most horrific pumpkin the teenagers had ever seen .
24/10/15 7:12:41
There was always a group of buoys hanging around outside Janes shop.
23/10/15 8:12:02
Even in death Dave was always escorted by a couple of bouncers.
22/10/14 23:31:01
Signs of exhaustion.
17/10/14 16:13:31
One thing you can say about Jane is that she can hold a tune.
25/10/16 11:01:45
With 6 miles of pristine beach Dave still manages to stand in the only bit of dog shit.
18/10/16 11:02:06
"You're having a doll for Christmas ""How the hell do you know that"" I felt your presents"
10/10/16 19:22:30
"New gloves, what happened to your last pair"?"Rectum".
10/10/16 7:19:44
They decided to blow their budget and go upmarket rather than the usual week at Blackpool.
23/11/15 13:18:42
Although he knew he would never be as strong as his friends the kitten showed doghead determination.
25/10/15 13:11:40
Police suspected Jane was running a knocking shop.
13/11/14 19:22:27
Sun sikhers
26/09/14 11:13:30
"Yeah she,s definitely not wearing any".
22/08/14 11:23:22
Dave was a perfectionist when it come to gardening,some said he was suffering from hoe.c.d.
12/06/14 18:35:19
Jane feared her husband would go ape shit when he saw how much stuff she had bought off amazon.
08/10/12 9:46:04
Cilla Blacks new denture was starting to take shape.
02/10/12 20:07:39
Shanghai H.G.V. test level one.
10/08/12 10:29:44
Coastline.
02/11/16 14:55:37
"Sorry babe I can't see you no more ""What , you mean we're splitting up"?"No it's your bloody hair I literally can't see you anymore ".
01/11/16 21:10:34
You have to be up at the crack of Dawn to get this shot.
04/10/16 12:18:39
I don't approve of sex in front of minors.
25/09/16 10:47:10
"Have you come this way before"?"Yes but it's usually when I reach the cobbled section".
16/12/15 18:17:03
High street.
28/10/15 10:31:44
Police cut backs cause mounted police and dog section to merge.
26/10/15 13:12:44
"Do you fancy playing a round"?"Easy tiger we only met 3 minutes ago".
18/10/15 14:56:22
"Somebody ordered a taxi from Wetherspoons"?
28/12/14 13:26:18
"Ah yes I remember you,you used to be a right ugly little bastard".
21/12/14 17:28:36
Shark infested mortars.
23/10/14 20:10:31
"Sorry we will have to do a re-shoot the bloody robin has disappeared up Justins arse again".
23/10/14 13:42:46
Madonna , the inspector gadget years.
30/09/14 9:12:03
"What's up mate"?" It started coffin and spluttering and I think it'sgone and blown a casket, trouble is I don't urn enough to get it fixed"
11/09/14 12:44:39
"Bugger that's the fourth mistake Iv'e made .Let me rub it out and start again".
13/08/14 14:02:13
Fire highgent.
08/06/14 15:10:33
Morph and his brother had really piled on the pounds on the buffalo wings diet.
08/11/12 13:01:33
The girl with the bad arm tattoo.
07/09/12 7:13:30
The box is in nice condition considering her age .
05/11/16 15:57:44
Mum that thimble you ordered of Amazon has arrived .
02/11/16 21:07:40
Dave was sick of the plastic litter being left on the pavement outside his shop.
02/11/16 5:15:56
Silver surfer.
17/10/16 13:48:34
Dominocan Republic.
03/10/16 11:11:44
Bollocks I suppose I'd better call a plumer.
01/10/16 20:25:25
Aisle candy.
19/09/16 19:52:55
"I've never seen such a brave cat"."Yeah I know he completely lost his sight two years ago. I think it was about that time he got incredibly brave".
26/11/15 20:05:33
Ideal for a nice trip.
24/11/15 10:49:08
Madam button fly.
09/11/15 8:26:38
Nice clean platform,shiny floors,no litter, very quite(nobody wanted to mention the elephant in the room).
31/10/15 12:16:49
Dave was getting pissed of with everyone saying he looked like their double.
16/10/15 11:47:55
The size of some selfie sticks was getting way out of hand.
11/10/15 13:59:26
Dave finally found the entrance to the terminal.
02/12/14 16:17:17
Noel Edmonds was shocked by Columbia's version of deal or no deal.
20/11/14 9:02:44
The famous explorer Christopher Cumulonibus.
17/11/14 18:14:51
The seven wifi of Henry VII.
18/10/14 8:13:05
Ah yes I love a day out at molten towers.
18/10/14 8:07:28
Scrotal microwave damage, also known as " boil in the bag".
30/09/14 0:53:39
A dab of clearasil soon got rid of the blackheads.
20/09/14 10:59:01
The Welsh were giving England a slating again as usual.
19/09/14 19:07:45
Frostie the snowman had finally met the woman of his dreams.
16/09/14 19:17:25
37 - 46 27 - 36 17 - 26 7 - 16 1 - 6
Arch enemy of the greenie goblin.
comment on caption: There's a new superhero on the block ,Mucus man. [Steve Davies]
Mucus Man and Greenie Goblin? Reckon these two would get right up you nose.
Very touching.
comment on caption: The annual haphephobia suffers dance was a huge success. [Steve Davies]
I suppose haph a phobia is better than a full one
Genie-us
comment on caption: "Where the hell were you last night"?"I was just on Hampstead Heath rubbing my lamp"."You dirty bastard". [Steve Davies]
I do so love a modest chap, lol.
comment on caption: Not bad , I find I have to use a wizards hat. [Steve Davies]
does that mean it's hiding my wizened sleeve?
Cant be arsed , shit pic fair play 😀
comment on caption: Shower with tape on the wall [Steve Davies]
Witty and imaginative Steve, love it xxx
comment on caption: As Dave celebrated his birthdaya witch callously steals his car. [Steve Davies]
lol
comment on caption: "Yeah sorry boss I'm lost , where am I? I'm in 4th 5th & 6th Ave". [Steve Davies]
Arch enemy of the greenie goblin.
1:57pm
comment on caption:
There's a new superhero on the block ,Mucus man.
[Steve Davies]
Mucus Man and Greenie Goblin? Reckon these two would get right up you nose.
7:42pm
comment on caption:
There's a new superhero on the block ,Mucus man.
[Steve Davies]
Very touching.
12:12pm
comment on caption:
The annual haphephobia suffers dance was a huge success.
[Steve Davies]
I suppose haph a phobia is better than a full one
12:50pm
comment on caption:
The annual haphephobia suffers dance was a huge success.
[Steve Davies]
Genie-us
10:08am
comment on caption:
"Where the hell were you last night"?
"I was just on Hampstead Heath rubbing my lamp".
"You dirty bastard".
[Steve Davies]
I do so love a modest chap, lol.
9:08am
comment on caption:
Not bad , I find I have to use a wizards hat. [Steve Davies]
does that mean it's hiding my wizened sleeve?
3:16pm
comment on caption:
Not bad , I find I have to use a wizards hat. [Steve Davies]
Cant be arsed , shit pic fair play 😀
11:41pm
comment on caption:
Shower with tape on the wall [Steve Davies]
Witty and imaginative Steve, love it xxx
5:30pm
comment on caption:
As Dave celebrated his birthday
a witch callously steals his car. [Steve Davies]
lol
5:43am
comment on caption:
"Yeah sorry boss I'm lost , where am I? I'm in 4th 5th & 6th Ave". [Steve Davies]