signed up: 1 year, 9 months ago
profile viewed: 721 time(s) this week
captions since joining: 1,445
captions this week: 27 (quota: 31)
votes given since joining: 877
vote score: 1640 
(47 this week)
Paul Woolley
BSc (Hons), MSc, Marathon runner, Noted lothario, Pilot, Doctor and winner of "Compulsive Liar of the Year" competition.
Interests: Caption competitions, ballroom dancing, walks, nights out, quizzes, Bond films.
Status: Single
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captions
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"Oman that looks bad" comments (total: 1) |
19/10/11 |
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“Ejaculate…..ejaculate….!” comments (total: 2) |
15/04/12 |
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After years of going "low energy", Phil switched back to a 100 watt bulb. |
12/04/12 |
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"Drinking lots never harmed me!" says Dave, 24 from Clapham. comments (total: 1) |
10/01/12 |
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"Ok, I know it's big but there's no need to spell it out!" comments (total: 1) |
29/10/11 |
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The first blonde to walk all over a Beetle since Heather Mills. comments (total: 8)This reminds me of the shell of a red volkswagon on top of a van with the caption: "Not only Heather Mills is taking a Beatle for a ride." Who created that one, anyone remember? 26/07/11
01:51am I don't know, but I certainly hope I'm not being accused of cheating because I haven't. This seemed an obvious joke to me and I was suprised no-one else had made a similar one once I got to post mine. 28/07/11
10:21am No need for finger-pointing here. It's natural that some caption concepts are going to be repeated over a period of years. In this case, Paul's caption is similar to one we saw from Stuart Chapman back in mid-2008, but Paul wasn't to know that as he signed up last year.
Both of these are on my todo list. See also: discussion in the forums 
Chris Beach  (admin) 28/07/11
10:39am Couldn't a caption be really funny for another picture also? old jokes are often repeated by comedians but with a twist. I think if anyone remembers a similar caption, maybe just pointing out which one might have the positive effect of people looking more into older captions. Depending on the twist the last caption might receive more or less votes according to originality.. 28/07/11
12:17pm |
25/07/11 |
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May the sauce be with you... |
02/01/12 |
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"Hello son, did you bring any souvenirs back from Thailand?" |
16/04/12 |
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After the Andrex puppy had nicked the toilet roll, things got even worse for Dave. |
11/04/12 |
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Loitering within tent |
05/03/12 |
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"Right, come on you lot, he's just finished cleaning his car..." comments (total: 2)I once had a blue car, and I,m sure the birds thought it was water, they used to cover it in sh--. 05/02/12
09:08pm |
05/02/12 |
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In Thailand it's not unusual to find a girl with a Chopper. comments (total: 2) |
04/01/12 |
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"And there you go, the full 'Leslie Ash'!" |
23/02/12 |
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"What factor suncream should I use?" |
05/12/11 |
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David was amazed that his neutrinos were in his jar as he hadn't planned on putting them there until tomorrow. comments (total: 7)If you understand the caption it's a brilliant one I agree :) 24/11/11
01:49pm Of course everyone knows that a Neutrino is an electrically neutral, weakly interacting elementary subatomic particle with a half-integer spin, chirality and a disputed but small non-zero mass. 26/11/11
05:48pm Paul Wooly won the £50 competition, even though the winner isn't announced for 30 days. 01/12/11
01:45pm |
24/11/11 |
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When Debbie found out her boyfriend had been sending pictures of his gentials to other women, she decided to buy him a suitable camera. |
02/04/12 |
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Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Park comments (total: 1) |
17/02/12 |
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"Tonight Matthew, I'm going to be....Whitney Houston." comments (total: 5)ooh, careful, the Caption.Me bad taste Police will be after you, threatening to resign... 17/02/12
07:24pm Good job the bad taste police don't go on sickipedia.com, they'd have a fit! lol
(caption author) 17/02/12
08:50pm So the freedom of one person to post a caption, even though it may be in bad taste is ok, but the freedom of someone to express a view on that caption as being in bad taste is not ok. Hahaha. 18/02/12
08:55am |
17/02/12 |
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It was a strain looking after Harry Redknapp's tax returns. |
26/01/12 |
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Photographers gather as John Cleese, Ronnie Barker and Ronnie Corbett arrive in Tokyo. comments (total: 2)Very very clever, how well I remember " I look up to him, but not as much as I look up to him." 19/11/11
07:13pm |
19/11/11 |
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"So I took my knickers off and said 'Have you ever seen a red-haired twat before?', and he said 'Yes, Mick Hucknall.'" comments (total: 7)Baggy Puss, this isn't my caption but I've got to say that the speech marks are perfect. In fact the whole sentence is punctuated perfectly (well done captioneer). It's great that you are policing the site but please get it right. 27/10/11
08:41pm Do you know what Steve, you are bloody right. I'm so sorry, I've just looked again and it is. Thank you for pointing that out mate. Sorry captioneer. I shall delete the wrong advice but just so people know, I incorrectly said that the speech marks were wrong and they are not... they're perfect. 27/10/11
09:06pm Thanks for your kind words. I know what you mean about spelling and punctuation etc as if it has been done badly it can really detract from a good idea.
(caption author) 27/10/11
09:35pm The speech marks have been used faultlessly; though the way I was taught, there should be a comma after 'said' as well. 30/10/11
12:00pm I did think about that, but I decided that when people were reading it to themselves I didn't want there to be any pause between the 'said' and the 'Yes'. I thought that having a comma there and also between 'Yes' and 'Mick Hucknall' would give two hesitations within a very short time and disturb the flow too much.
(caption author) 30/10/11
12:06pm @David G and Anon. Not really. Commas aren't supposed to show a pause. If a sentence needs a pause for breath then it's too long. The comma is used to signify an aside, something that is incidental to the main point of the sentence. You should be able to remove that part (the part before or after one comma OR the part between two) of the sentence without it losing its main meaning. If we add a comma where you suggest - and then remove the incidental part between the two commas - we're left with "So I took my knickers off and said 'Yes, Mick Hucknall.'". I agree that that could work as a sentence but it loses most of its meaning. 30/10/11
06:28pm |
27/10/11 |
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"Why Dubai such weird t-shirts?" |
19/10/11 |
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"Hmm, it says here that Socrates thought that for a man to conquer himself is the first and noblest of all victories." |
10/10/11 |
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Don't drink and dive. |
24/02/12 |
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Black pawn meets white knight |
19/01/12 |
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"Vacancy: Washers required." |
07/11/11 |
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The doctor thinks I've got Qatar. |
19/10/11 |
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"I'll get you for this, Butler!" |
02/03/12 |
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The government once again ignored Bombardier and awarded the new train contract to Dave's Autos in Croydon. |
07/01/12 |
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Snow White was beginning to regret moving in. |
07/12/11 |
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She should have gone the Safeway. |
26/11/11 |
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"...and under the UK's new immigration controls you can accept this lollipop as my passport." |
15/11/11 |
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Another photo of a big-chested airhead. |
24/10/11 |
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"I've seen the Bond films. Now we've pushed dad's Lotus into the water it should turn into a submarine." |
18/10/11 |
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It's amazing what you can find on Gumtree. |
01/05/12 |
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Even in his old age, Dr Doolittle could still pull the birds. |
29/04/12 |
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Defective Jean Pool |
25/03/12 |
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No wonder they look happy, they just got laid. |
26/02/12 |
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Insane-sburys |
30/01/12 |
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"Virgin?" |
12/01/12 |
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After MPs advise people to have 2 drink free days, Dave picks January the 10th and 11th....2056. |
10/01/12 |
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"How much is that dogging in the window...?" |
30/12/11 |
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…and over the road a man with a megaphone advertising a library for the deaf. |
14/12/11 |
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"You were meant to build a futuristic house!" |
14/12/11 |
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Tim was well prepared for the Brussel Sprout season. |
13/12/11 |
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"No, it says 'add a baby mushroom'!" |
21/11/11 |
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"I don't get it...it says 'Please Turn Over' on both sides..." |
13/10/11 |
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Media shower. |
09/10/11 |
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"Do you think you're addicted to drink, Bob?" |
30/04/12 |
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"Here in Africa, when it rains for 3 weeks we call it a monsoon." comments (total: 2) |
29/04/12 |
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top comments (total: 80)
As someone else has pointed out, looking at his top 50 captions there appears to be a large percentage of cut and paste jobs. When I looked I found about 16 that appeared to be direct lifts and 5 more possibles.
As for stuggling for inspiration, the copy and paste jobs all appear to be posted as soon as the photo appears, which suggests a certain amount of premeditation on his part. Plus the fact that he has been caught out claiming that one of the cut and paste jobs was actually his own idea, when it is word for word the same as a sickipedia one. Of course, the comment after that photo where one captioneer congratulated him on his idea and Steve then explained how he had "thought up" the idea have now vanished.
I admit that he comes up with some great captions that appear to be his own work, but if he didn't intend to deceive people then why has he never added any nods or notes to say he'd taken the joke from elsewhere? After all, if he's just in it for the comedy and not the votes then there would be no harm in telling everyone which ones weren't his ideas, would there???
He's only owned up to it when he's been found out, has been trying to justify himself saying "it's only a few" despite many of them getting him large numbers of votes, and has not apologised once! He's been caught out knowingly trying to pass other people's work off as being his own ideas. I know I'm not the only one on here who's pissed off with what he's done, and if some people's way of expressing this is to have a go through their captions then why complain?
He's brought it on himself.
01:03pm
comment on caption: If Carlsberg did captions... it'd give us another option instead of sickipedia. [James Fotheringham]
That explains why some of Van Gogh's paintings weren't that good!
12:32pm
comment on caption: I bought these glasses off a bloke with 1 ear. [Roley Martin]
That reminds me of another Paul Merton quip. Michael Caine goes backstage at a concert in the 60s and sees some prostitutes fellating the Rolling Stones, and says "You're only supposed to blow the bloody Doors off!"
07:55pm
comment on caption:
(said in a Sir Michael Caine accent)
You were suppose to park the car.....not blow the bloody door off. [Gayna Dee]
It must do, it looks like they both came together.
08:04pm
comment on caption: Are you sure this cures Premiture Ejaculation? [David Manley]
I was really chuffed with myself for this one. But you can tell I'm not voting for myself from another computer or account because this has still got zero points lol. Incidentally, where are you resting that wine glass??? 
07:04pm
Thanks, here's a vote. Partially for your caption (I've only ever used it on my back, thank god!) but mostly for the reviews on your link, which have had me in stiches and have led me to favourite them so I can enjoy the rest another time.
08:40pm
comment on caption: After using Veet for Men be sure to rinse thoroughly.
"It's ok, I really am this small" said Ernie.
12:31pm
comment on caption: Morecambe and Eyes. [Ethelia Fotherington-Smythe]
Gynecology: Even in a recession it's a career that's always looking up!
12:25pm
comment on caption: Hi, I'm Dr Frank. I'll be your gynecologist today. [Joe T]
"An Eagle and a pair of great tits" sounds like what Tiger Woods is hoping for whilst standing on the 18th tee.
09:48pm
comment on caption: What a day out, An Eagle and a pair of great tits. [Dan Dan]
last comments (total: 119)
Doubt it- he has to be the campest repressed gay man in music history.
*Ring ring*
"Ah hello, Morrissey's lawyer... Oh."
Allegedly the campest repressed gay man in music history.
01:59pm
comment on caption: "There you go, Morrissey, you can come out tonight after all." [Paul Woolley]
Under all this snow it might be John 
08:29pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
Not a Fosbraey flop then.
08:26pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
I thought I told you to go easy on us!
08:21pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
Thank you, I promised to throw a few captions in this week and they seemed to have gone down well. :)
08:19pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
Good to see you back! Not good for the rest of our scores, obviously, but good none the less. 
08:14pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
You could have at least buried me with a beer. ;)
08:09pm
comment on caption:
"Do you think you've got a good chance in the caption competition Dave?"
"Yes, I've buried Fosbraey." [Paul Woolley]
Really good
05:58pm
comment on caption:
"Here in Africa, when it rains for 3 weeks we call it a monsoon."
"Really? In the UK we call it a drought!" [Paul Woolley]
Topical and funny.
08:58pm
comment on caption:
"Here in Africa, when it rains for 3 weeks we call it a monsoon."
"Really? In the UK we call it a drought!" [Paul Woolley]
Top Quality.
11:33am