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Mark England Vote score: 12707Mark England

Roddy had scrubbed his hands over 10 times in a 3 hour period but the smell was still there. He vowed never to eat a packet of Scampi Fries ever again

11/09/17 7:05:37

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 8492Dan Nicholls

"He was about here on me, and I am only 5 ft 8".
Police interview the latest victim of 'Shorty the Mugger'.

11/09/17 8:04:51

 
John  Glover Vote score: 15632John Glover

"Take care, my hand is a deadly weapon, no, not this one, my left hand, the one with the gun in it."

11/09/17 12:34:35

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 3230Mr Dome

I've had it up to here with your shit captions

11/09/17 8:01:10

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 28626Welsh Rarebit

Lipsmackinthirstquenchinacetastinmotivatingcooltalkinhighwalkinfastlivingevergivingcoolfizzing...Gypsy

11/09/17 10:26:13

 
larry G. Vote score: 914larry G.

"After 6 red bulls and 4 cappuccino's my hands are steady as a rock."

11/09/17 17:21:30

 
G fj Vote score: 321G fj

"Yes half my Burka has been stolen, It was black and came up to about here" said Akia...

11/09/17 12:46:42

 
Tiny Alien Vote score: 2286Tiny Alien

That awkward moment when you're wiping your arse and your finger rips through the toilet paper!

11/09/17 10:25:19

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 4378Pussy Galore

"It's the new nail colour from Elizabeth Arden. Do you like it?"

11/09/17 9:06:38

 
Pete  Vote score: 16210Pete

Gypsy nose Lee.

11/09/17 8:08:18

 
Tony Busby Vote score: 2068Tony Busby

"Dammit these streets are mean... stole my bloody mouth organ..."

11/09/17 7:13:15

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 19354Michael Winner

"Dude, I say this to all of my clients- as your lawyer, you're probably going down."

11/09/17 7:05:38

 
Bobby D Vote score: 719Bobby D

Mate, you've dropped your spliff

12/09/17 2:50:53

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 4378Pussy Galore

"Guess what this is. Go on. Guess."
"Sooty in the nude?"
"Oh, you've heard it before."

(Nod to 8:16:13)

11/09/17 22:32:41

 
larry G. Vote score: 914larry G.

"would you buy me a yard of Ale?"

11/09/17 17:57:26

 
tony kelly Vote score: 1004tony kelly

''Online? Yeah . My dick is this big...''

11/09/17 11:22:00

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 1799Vivvy En

"Hey, phone me if you wanna hang out sometime."

11/09/17 10:11:23

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 317Barrie Bullock

The smell of Melanie lingers on.

11/09/17 9:53:25

 
Eamon Moore Vote score: 161Eamon Moore

Worlds foremost shadow puppeteer.

11/09/17 8:10:50

 
Jonathan Allsopp Vote score: 2798Jonathan Allsopp

Steve explains how the hurricane had reduced his Harley-Davidson to the size of a paperclip.

11/09/17 7:51:18

 
Mark England Vote score: 12707Mark England

"No John, I texted 'Fancy coming to Pilates class'.. not Pirates class"

11/09/17 7:31:30

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 17269Ian Skelding

Joe the Puppeteer couldn't afford a puppet.

11/09/17 7:16:13

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 19354Michael Winner

Sometimes, cop shows can be too gritty.

11/09/17 7:08:06

 
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