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Mark England Vote score: 13114Mark England

Roddy had scrubbed his hands over 10 times in a 3 hour period but the smell was still there. He vowed never to eat a packet of Scampi Fries ever again

11/09/17 7:05:37

Dan Nicholls Vote score: 9245Dan Nicholls

"He was about here on me, and I am only 5 ft 8".
Police interview the latest victim of 'Shorty the Mugger'.

11/09/17 8:04:51

John  Glover Vote score: 16783John Glover

"Take care, my hand is a deadly weapon, no, not this one, my left hand, the one with the gun in it."

11/09/17 12:34:35

Mr Dome  Vote score: 4106Mr Dome

I've had it up to here with your shit captions

11/09/17 8:01:10

Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 29798Welsh Rarebit


11/09/17 10:26:13

larry G. Vote score: 948larry G.

"After 6 red bulls and 4 cappuccino's my hands are steady as a rock."

11/09/17 17:21:30

G fj Vote score: 348G fj

"Yes half my Burka has been stolen, It was black and came up to about here" said Akia...

11/09/17 12:46:42

Tiny Alien Vote score: 2286Tiny Alien

That awkward moment when you're wiping your arse and your finger rips through the toilet paper!

11/09/17 10:25:19

Pussy Galore Vote score: 5024Pussy Galore

"It's the new nail colour from Elizabeth Arden. Do you like it?"

11/09/17 9:06:38

Pete  Vote score: 17203Pete

Gypsy nose Lee.

11/09/17 8:08:18

Tony Busby Vote score: 2068Tony Busby

"Dammit these streets are mean... stole my bloody mouth organ..."

11/09/17 7:13:15

Michael Winner Vote score: 19821Michael Winner

"Dude, I say this to all of my clients- as your lawyer, you're probably going down."

11/09/17 7:05:38

Bobby D Vote score: 719Bobby D

Mate, you've dropped your spliff

12/09/17 2:50:53

Pussy Galore Vote score: 5024Pussy Galore

"Guess what this is. Go on. Guess."
"Sooty in the nude?"
"Oh, you've heard it before."

(Nod to 8:16:13)

11/09/17 22:32:41

larry G. Vote score: 948larry G.

"would you buy me a yard of Ale?"

11/09/17 17:57:26

tony kelly Vote score: 1202tony kelly

''Online? Yeah . My dick is this big...''

11/09/17 11:22:00

Vivvy En Vote score: 2253Vivvy En

"Hey, phone me if you wanna hang out sometime."

11/09/17 10:11:23

Barrie Bullock Vote score: 329Barrie Bullock

The smell of Melanie lingers on.

11/09/17 9:53:25

Eamon Moore Vote score: 161Eamon Moore

Worlds foremost shadow puppeteer.

11/09/17 8:10:50

Jonathan Allsopp Vote score: 2799Jonathan Allsopp

Steve explains how the hurricane had reduced his Harley-Davidson to the size of a paperclip.

11/09/17 7:51:18

Mark England Vote score: 13114Mark England

"No John, I texted 'Fancy coming to Pilates class'.. not Pirates class"

11/09/17 7:31:30

Ian Skelding Vote score: 17929Ian Skelding

Joe the Puppeteer couldn't afford a puppet.

11/09/17 7:16:13

Michael Winner Vote score: 19821Michael Winner

Sometimes, cop shows can be too gritty.

11/09/17 7:08:06

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