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This Week | Last Week | All Time | ||||||||
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Quota | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | Added | Score | Rank | |
Captions | 77 | 21 | 48 | #7 | 16 | 71 | #5 | 5978 | 16341 | #16 |
Photos | 10 | #4 | 11 | #4 | 380 | 948 | #6 | |||
Comments | 8 | 8 | 4 | #3 | 1 | 1144 | 1746 | #3 | ||
Forum Posts | 2 | 53 | ||||||||
Suggested Edits | 5 | 28 | 34 | #3 | ||||||
Tips | 1 | 2 | #1 | 1 | 2 | #9 |
This Week | Last Week | All Time | ||||
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Voted | Rank | Voted | Rank | Voted | Rank | |
Captions | 45 | #5 | 32 | #11 | 9545 | #25 |
Photos | 889 | #22 | ||||
Comments | 9 | #1 | 1897 | #5 | ||
Forum Posts | ||||||
Suggested Edits | 1 | #1 | 26 | #2 | ||
Tips | 1 | #4 |
captions
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18/01/24 8:12:29, edited: 15/03/24 18:17:37 |
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Many congratulations, James - blooming marvellous! --Molly R
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01/09/23 20:02:48, edited: 15/03/24 18:19:32 |
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Love your caption James. You're gonna need a bigger vote 😉 --Dot Old
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"This is most embarrassing, but could you help? Somehow I've caught my penis in the fence." 18/07/21 12:55:41 |
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Many congratulations, James! I've been out of it a while with Covid and missed some pictures entirely, so this has come as a new delight. A very worthy winner! --Molly R
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10/01/24 8:33:06 |
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Hahahahahaha. That's hilarious! You've made me choke on my toast. --Vivvy En
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"Dave, you say? Carrying a blue pack, you say? Nope, I haven't seen him." 11/07/24 12:11:14 |
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23/03/19 8:46:34 |
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Haha. I don't mind chipping in a tenner for second place (it definitely will not be one of mine)!! Great caption. Genuinely choked on my toast. So thanks for nearly killing me! --The Wolf
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22/01/19 8:22:17 |
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Thanks Dave and everyone else. Chuffed to be on the board and loving the spirit of Caption.me. Will continue to represent the hobbits down here in NZ. Cheers all. --James Lennox
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*Ding* 13/01/23 12:10:08, edited: 13/01/23 12:31:58 |
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I agree with KT A. This is a killer. --Dave Bryan
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"Bloody typical," muttered Dave. "I just paid £25 for mine." 20/01/24 12:10:18 |
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This public gathering is just asking to get Corona. 12/05/20 8:16:32 |
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Looks like the shit's hit the van. 16/07/23 8:23:55 |
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"Lord Vader, the Rebels are attacking. Perhaps you should change out of your pyjamas." 27/12/22 20:01:39 |
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18/06/22 8:00:31 |
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Cheers for the congrats, guys. I think I was lucky to pip Tony's one, so I'm very glad he got a 2nd place prize. A big cheer out to the caption.me contributors who have made this extra prize possible. And, as always, many thanks to Chris for the... --James Lennox
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17/03/22 8:01:22 |
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09/03/21 12:35:25 |
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...and along with the suit he was wearing. --Willie Johnson
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28/04/20 20:23:57 |
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First off, I'd like to thank the Academy ... no but seriously, thanks to Chris for picking #3 (I too preferred it to my other), and kudos to Smuldo for being equal #1. Thanks also to Mr. Dome for his "BeeSI: Miami", which forced me to edit my ... --James Lennox
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...followed closely by 12 disciples, a horde of Romans, and the Benny Hill theme music. 01/05/24 12:06:27, edited: 01/05/24 13:38:16, |
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13/11/23 8:01:26 |
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Nice one ... It took me a while --John Glover
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29/04/23 8:05:06 |
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"Disaster here in the Paralympic eventing course as Wu Chan's wheelchair refuses to take that jump." 01/12/22 20:07:31 |
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"Gosh darn it," said Davy-Bob. "Nobody told me you could reload them." 12/12/21 12:08:44 |
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Javelins should only be thrown outdoors. 03/02/20 12:00:41 |
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The good news is she was standing just past the world record distance. --Willie Johnson
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Ideal for preventing skid marks. 24/05/24 8:01:21, edited: 24/05/24 8:15:24 |
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Please go ahead. --Paul Gledhill
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05/02/24 8:01:50, edited: 05/02/24 8:21:59 |
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15/10/23 20:13:01 |
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Best Captioneer a few weeks in a row and The Wolf gets all cocky. 28/09/23 20:17:44 |
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Yea I wanna C a Camel toe. --Karen McDonald
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I have a strange urge to whack her with an oversize rubber mallet. 17/11/20 9:17:11 |
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The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on. 31/07/20 8:09:57 |
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18/07/24 8:06:40, edited: 18/07/24 8:24:18 |
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21/03/24 12:00:40 |
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Some people shouldn't be allowed to raise children. 16/09/22 12:00:35 |
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Usually, they're called parents. --Glyn Evans
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"Perfect, my last batch was a little on the dark side." 29/03/22 20:28:20 |
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"I'm sorry luv, but Noah said I'm only allowed to bring one, and Nancy's got better tits." 06/04/21 12:26:41 |
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"Yes, but I don't think Nancy is the right monkey for you on this trip, Joan," said Percy. :^) --Crunchy Chords
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Harold always believed the son shone out of his arse. 27/08/20 8:00:40 |
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If dodos had been better jugglers they wouldn't be extinct. 08/02/20 12:00:17 |
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21/05/19 12:00:27 |
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It was a beautiful wedding, but the honeymoon in France didn't end well. 01/03/19 20:13:39 |
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The Four Riders of the Alpacalypse 14/01/24 8:17:49 |
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17/08/23 20:05:32, edited: 17/08/23 20:06:03 |
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"Hang on, mum, we haven't tied the string round Billy's bad tooth yet." 18/12/22 20:43:09 |
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...and who can forget Dave's final words: 27/04/21 20:40:05 |
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"Pssst! Word of advice. Some Russians might take offence to this as they might see it as an insult to their National animal, however I know that you're talking about it's actual state of being. If you're urinal cake is glowing a funny colour o... --Glyn Evans
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27/11/20 8:36:38 |
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😂😂😂 I’ve since looked at a Kiwi bird on Images and now it all makes sense and it’s a brilliant caption. I couldn’t stop laughing when I saw what the Kiwi bird looked like. I am going to lol this caption because it’s funny and clev... --Karen Oakenfull
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Nobody makes better balloon animals than Dave. 29/09/20 20:15:41 |
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Always start with a blowfish --Al Overy
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Giving up smoking, diary entry day 23: Either I'm starting to hallucinate or my wife is a bitch. 03/03/19 20:47:18 |
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No she’s not, she menthol 🙃 --Karen Oakenfull
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"OK, get off, kid. It's your big sister's turn." 10/07/24 8:03:44 |
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"Um... just cover it back up," said Tony Robinson. 13/05/24 20:20:44 |
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29/03/24 21:30:50, edited: 29/03/24 21:32:27 |
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09/03/24 8:06:15, edited: 09/03/24 8:07:26 |
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--Chris Beach
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04/03/24 20:09:39 |
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"It was either this or pineapple." 24/02/24 20:04:31 |
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16/01/24 8:16:36 |
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30/12/23 12:11:12 |
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"I thought after 80 years he'd have forgiven me for eating his porridge!" 29/09/23 8:05:07, edited: 29/09/23 8:12:23 |
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"I'm sure we've met, but I'm sorry, my short term memory is terrible." 22/09/23 8:03:59 |
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16/11/22 20:01:07, edited: 16/11/22 20:01:48 |
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"So God created Adam in His own image, which, strangely, was that of a 70s pornstar." 07/05/22 13:28:08 |
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14/12/20 8:05:11 |
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Barbie hasn't changed much in the last 60 years. Ken on the other hand ... 24/11/20 8:17:40 |
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Well that's interesting and disturbing Willie. I bet Ken's namesake had a fun childhood growing up as the kid who has a penis-less incestuous plastic doll named after him. --James Lennox
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Always buy your catnip from a trusted source. 08/09/20 14:23:56 |
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Looks like the match went to sudden death. 17/07/19 8:30:33 |
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"j.vxd tyuiojkmn njy s[l; hj jggt jhb v rstdebg" 21/04/24 22:46:59 |
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"Ok, girls, now our husbands have gone, let's put away the Tupperware and bring out the vibrators." 22/02/24 20:01:42, edited: 23/02/24 5:26:55, |
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This is the type of arrant pedantry up with which I shall not put. --Scrijjy Doo
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01/02/24 20:07:16 |
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"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE FLYING THAT SLEIGH YOU FAT BASTARD!!" 24/12/23 20:05:41 |
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07/11/23 8:04:00 |
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"And here's 4,999 I prepared earlier." 11/08/23 20:20:11 |
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10/08/23 20:47:41 |
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I guess the moral of the story is to be careful what's down under when you're Down Under. --Stephen Bean
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"Are you going to take the train, Dave?" 18/06/23 8:03:56 |
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"The worst thing about Great Floods," moaned God. "Is having to dry everything afterwards." 04/06/23 12:01:22 |
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01/01/23 20:00:20 |
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09/11/22 12:00:44 |
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What the hell is Sambuchino, and why is throwing it at gnomes a good defence? 31/08/22 8:10:06 |
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09/07/22 8:00:27 |
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"That's OK, you're swimming in our septic tank." 19/05/22 8:02:06 |
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08/10/21 8:08:37 |
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"Sorry to intrude, but could I please have my rubber bone back?" 19/07/21 8:07:59 |
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Sadly, none of the gospels recorded Jesus's performance of YMCA. 23/04/21 12:12:14 |
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Described by critics as 'rather wooden'. --Karyn Harrison
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22/03/21 8:04:11 |
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US politics are insane, General Lee speaking. 24/01/21 8:06:09 |
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12/04/20 8:01:39 |
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"... and then he took his shirt off and things started to get weird." 09/04/20 20:40:08 |
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No animals were harmed during the making of this picture, but some were highly pissed off. 25/03/20 8:07:25 |
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"No animals were harmed" - just someone's dignity. --Willie Johnson
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"Ok Dave, you create a diversion while I steal the mini." 09/01/20 12:14:25 |
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05/12/19 8:04:18 |
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02/09/19 8:57:49 |
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"One way or another Monsieur, you will leave a tip." 05/03/19 12:24:57 |
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15/02/19 20:16:18 |
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3 o'clock that night... 30/06/24 20:21:25, edited: 30/06/24 20:24:47 |
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"If you want a laugh, throw 3 sticks in different directions." 01/06/24 20:24:18, edited: 01/06/24 20:35:56 |
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18/05/24 8:05:09 |
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18/04/24 12:16:16 |
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"One wonders if she spreads easily." 09/03/24 20:07:56 |
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No, that's her sister, Flora. --Karyn Harrison
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19/02/24 20:15:33 |
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Dave was rubbish at picking up girls. 31/12/23 20:19:41, edited: 01/01/24 8:03:59 |
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"Yeah, sex with him is dry, boring, and one sided, but for some reason it does keep my thrush away." 12/12/23 8:24:39 |
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"Jeez, I could murder a grandma ... I mean, a kebab." 07/12/23 8:13:13, edited: 07/12/23 8:28:15 |
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Ha, you've got me wondering now whether murder a grandma is funnier. It's nice having the double 'gr' sound though. --Stephen Bean
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12/10/23 20:17:35 |
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13/08/23 20:31:47 |
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"Any last words, sir?" 04/06/23 20:52:29, edited: 04/06/23 20:55:29 |
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The did say his sentence would be suspended. --Tony S
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And in Dublin, the annual 'Swap you Wife for a Keg of Guinness' promotion kicks off. 04/05/23 8:01:19 |
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I'd almost have voted for that, AL. Excruciating puns are fine, they only land you in the first circle of Hell (the one where Hitler tickles your feet with a feather whilst wearing a red leather mankini). Regurgitate puns, however, and you're damned for all eternity.
7:16am
comment on caption:
There is a special circle of hell reserved for Captioneers who reuse old puns. [James Lennox]
Nod and an apology vote to 8:10:07
8:14am
comment on caption:
It's only a matter of time before somebody mentions Robert Plant and Kate Bush. [James Lennox]
I tried voting for this before it was edited but it keeps knocking me back. I think I've got to wait for someone else to vote for it before I'm allowed to, even though the last time I voted was a few hours ago.
Although presently it allows me to vote for ones that have already got votes 🤔
I might vote for this later on after someone else has voted for it! 😉
Luckily someone has voted for this caption so I am permitted to but I am still not allowed to vote with anything that has no votes this morning even twelve hours later 😂
8:26pm
comment on caption:
"I see you've been branded, too. Sorry, mate, they don't wash off." [James Lennox]
Thanks, Glyn, appreciated. Comment vote pending![wink](/core/images/smilies/wink.gif)
8:04am
comment on caption:
"I see you've been branded, too. Sorry, mate, they don't wash off." [James Lennox]
I wanted to give you a heads up but I can't keep doing this every time it's happening.
It's still doing it, but mainly for anything that hasn't already received any votes.
My voting strategy is then going to be based on whether anyone has voted for something first so I'm going to have to wait until everyone else votes
It appears I can't vote for anything that has no votes...as it tells me to take a breather even if I wait five minutes to try again 🤔😂
11:54am
comment on caption:
"I see you've been branded, too. Sorry, mate, they don't wash off." [James Lennox]
Glyn, this problem has been discussed in the Forum at https://forum.caption.me/t/rate-limits-on-first-votes/1783.
6:35am
comment on caption:
"I see you've been branded, too. Sorry, mate, they don't wash off." [James Lennox]
Molly thank you for the heads up, and in time too for the consensus vote which closes in the next few hours, so anybody else still wanting to vote I'd recommend you get a move on! 😅 Yes, and I should have checked the forum when something new happens!
I realise I'm probably being rated because of a negative find quality.
That's probably because I do all my voting afterwards so I don't know if there's anyone to then add on to the vote after me. However I'm not going to avoid a caption I like simply because everyone may have done so or even missed it
10:05am
comment on caption:
"I see you've been branded, too. Sorry, mate, they don't wash off." [James Lennox]
Sorry, Karyn. Post-vote edit was just a typo correction.
8:25pm
comment on caption:
"...so, then I got counselling, and that helped me move on from the whole Jane Goodall inappropriate touching thing." [James Lennox]
To be honest I hadn't even noticed the typo, caption author. 🙂
9:29pm
comment on caption:
"...so, then I got counselling, and that helped me move on from the whole Jane Goodall inappropriate touching thing." [James Lennox]
It's a long, and uninteresting story, Karyn. I resorted to Americanized word assist (due to club fingers on a tiny phone), but after staring at 'counseling' for a few painful minutes, one of my mental disorders forced me to edit![wink](/core/images/smilies/wink.gif)
9:57pm
comment on caption:
"...so, then I got counselling, and that helped me move on from the whole Jane Goodall inappropriate touching thing." [James Lennox]