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"Its amazing how you managed to splice seagull and velociraptor DNA together professor, but are you sure its safe?"  "Yes, as long as you dont run out of chips."
"Its amazing how you managed to splice seagull and velociraptor DNA together professor, but are you sure its safe?"  "Yes, as long as you dont run out of chips." photo | portfolio
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Stephen Bean Vote score: 21148Stephen Bean

"It's amazing how you managed to splice seagull and velociraptor DNA together professor, but are you sure it's safe?"

"Yes, as long as you don't run out of chips."

Fri 12:00:09

 3
"Oh Yes," said Ford. "It’s perfectly safe - it’s just US who are in trouble." :^) --Crunchy Chords
Chris Keegan Vote score: 11227Chris Keegan

What is it with birds and botox?

Fri 13:28:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 18789Dave Bryan

TEN SECONDS EARLIER

''Excuse me, sir, smoking is not allowed on the bird reserve.''

Fri 12:04:13

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 27141Ian Skelding

“Has anyone seen my Lacrosse racket?”

Fri 12:10:37

 
The Wolf Vote score: 15276The Wolf

"I told you not to use Leslie Ash's plastic surgeon."

Fri 12:38:24

 
Al Overy Vote score: 9903Al Overy

BREAKING - Cambridge boffins under fire over 'pointless' experiment to see how many Big Mac Meals it takes to choke a pelican.

Fri 12:11:07

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 21148Stephen Bean

"Hey, would you like to be on our basketball team?"

"Sure, what position?"

"The net."

Fri 12:06:12

 
The Wolf Vote score: 15276The Wolf

Up next on Channel 5, Top 10 Theresa May impressions...

Fri 12:50:36

 
The Wolf Vote score: 15276The Wolf

"I used to look like you. That was until I fell asleep next to that f*cking blind man who started making balloon animals in the park."

Fri 12:09:05

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 13147Mr Dome

Have it back, it's from KFC

Fri 13:10:44

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 6366Tosser Wivlov

You fool I said we should go to the park and catch flies.

Fri 13:09:32

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 6684Karyn Harrison

"BASTARD!"

Fri 12:15:32

 
Al Overy Vote score: 9903Al Overy

"Hey! That was for Boris!"

"Nah. He's had his chips."

Fri 12:00:48

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 4294Mark Wilson

"Who threw that Frisby?"

Sat 10:04:25

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 12584Neil Mackenzie

If it wasn’t for the chip on his shoulder the Seagull would have none.

Fri 20:23:35

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1598alexandra ball

He's giving big mouth Billy bass a run for his money.

Fri 20:05:29

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 9203Glyn Evans

Say "Oarrrr!!!!"

Fri 20:02:12

 
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