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I suppose there are worse places to shit yourself.
I suppose there are worse places to shit yourself. photo | portfolio
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Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

I suppose there are worse places to shit yourself.

10/10/21 20:00:21

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17217Dave Bryan

BUSINESS NEWS

Toilet roll sales plummet as The Andrex Spider fails to connect with the public.

10/10/21 20:02:50

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 5194Crunchy Chords

Tired of all the sh*t on the web?

10/10/21 20:00:09

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 25326Michael Winner

*whisper* The Marshmallow Spider has notoriously poor eyesight."

10/10/21 20:12:14

 
Tony S Vote score: 3008Tony S

I'm a celebrity producers dismiss claims of animal cruelty saying all creatures used on the show are put up in 5 star hotels before their performance.

10/10/21 20:37:04

 1
There's been no complaints from the any of the creatures from the Bush Tucker Challenge --Glyn Evans
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10764Chris Keegan

This is the third night in a row he's scared the pants off the wife. He's on a roll.

10/10/21 20:24:58

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 1085Charles Gilbert

...and that's how I burned down the bathroom.

10/10/21 20:11:01

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1450alexandra ball

Guaranteed cure for constipation.

10/10/21 20:01:02

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

"I've never seen an Andrex puppy run so fast."

10/10/21 20:01:00

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 6425Karyn Harrison

"It can wait until the morning."

10/10/21 20:00:11

 
Ryan F Vote score: 179Ryan F

Can I preorder a fire engine please? My house is about to burn down.

10/10/21 22:35:06

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3780Mark Wilson

Love, I've just dried my face in the towel, is there any reason it stinks of shit?

10/10/21 21:40:49

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17217Dave Bryan

''When she notices me her Izal pop out of her head.''

10/10/21 20:51:15

 
Al Overy Vote score: 8220Al Overy

Crapdoor Spider

10/10/21 20:29:01

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

Arabog

10/10/21 20:14:20

 
Steve Wright Vote score: 1854Steve Wright

Acrapnophobia

10/10/21 23:37:31

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5698Lucky Elperro

Being the first to be voted off 'I'm a celebrity get me out of here' did at least mean you went back to the luxury hotel"

10/10/21 21:59:14

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 16242Dan Nicholls

Cack widow

10/10/21 21:27:53

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 2187Karen Oakenfull

Nowadays, many spiders grab their own strip of toilet roll first before sliding into an empty bath.

10/10/21 20:46:22

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 8347Vivvy En

"Yes, very good, Incy, but I'd be more impressed if you'd dispose of the paper after wiping your bum."

10/10/21 20:36:44

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17217Dave Bryan

Little Miss Muffet knew how to rough it,
eating those curds and whey.
Even a spider who sat down beside her
took one sniff and then ran away.

10/10/21 20:27:15

 
Al Overy Vote score: 8220Al Overy

Turd-eating Spider

10/10/21 20:26:58

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 26231Ian Skelding

There's bound to be Botflys in here.

10/10/21 20:19:49

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 5194Crunchy Chords

🎵 Creepy crawly, Bare-arse the spider 🎵

10/10/21 20:05:24

 
Tony S Vote score: 3008Tony S

"I'm off to the supermarket to buy some more toilet rolls and yes it is panic buying."

10/10/21 20:04:12

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

Little Miss Muffet sat on a toilet passing her turds and wee, when...

10/10/21 20:00:08

 
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