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Over thousands of years the walrus has evolved into one of the very few animals who can smoke two cigarettes at the same time.
Over thousands of years the walrus has evolved into one of the very few animals who can smoke two cigarettes at the same time. photo | portfolio
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Dave Bryan Vote score: 17217Dave Bryan

Over thousands of years the walrus has evolved into one of the very few animals who can smoke two cigarettes at the same time.

05/10/21 20:05:33

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 5350Stu Dent

They come over here and steal our fish.

05/10/21 20:46:04

 1
Oh, come on there's plenty more fish in the sea until a super trawler comes along --Glyn Evans
Michael Winner Vote score: 25326Michael Winner

"Excuse me my good man, but I'm a bit lost- I'm looking for Norway?"

05/10/21 20:42:23

 1
That's not the right direction. Nor-way. --Willie Johnson
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

"Could you turn the key in the ignition for me please?"

05/10/21 20:45:08

 
Al Overy Vote score: 8220Al Overy

"I used to be a landblubber."

05/10/21 20:07:41

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 6425Karyn Harrison

"It's a relief to get away from that beach, I can tell you."

05/10/21 20:03:05

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19334Stephen Bean

"Don't worry, I'll get off your boat when they stop playing that terrible music down there."

05/10/21 20:23:30

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3780Mark Wilson

"Hello, you must be my 11.30 water-skiing lesson"

05/10/21 20:19:54

 
Poxy Jock Vote score: 94Poxy Jock

The Where's Wally competition used to be a lot harder in my youth

05/10/21 20:01:39

 
Joe Vote score: 1762Joe

Midlife crisis? Are you saying I'm long in the tooth

05/10/21 22:12:34

 
Al Overy Vote score: 8220Al Overy

As the ice caps continue to melt, it's only the very rich who survive.

05/10/21 20:29:57

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5698Lucky Elperro

Woke Daniel Craig replacement leaked.

05/10/21 20:10:07

 1
Why did they get rid of Daniel Craig and replace him with a walrus? Maybe he's the walrus and his casting agent is really a wizard who's into transformation spells? --Glyn Evans
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 5194Crunchy Chords

"Goo goo g'joob, losers!"

05/10/21 20:00:06

 
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