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"This is an important Government announcement: There are plenty of shellfish and no need to panic. Do not rush to the beach..."
"This is an important Government announcement: There are plenty of shellfish and no need to panic. Do not rush to the beach..." photo | portfolio
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Al Overy Vote score: 8295Al Overy

£50
WINNER

"This is an important Government announcement: There are plenty of shellfish and no need to panic. Do not rush to the beach..."

27/09/21 8:00:41

 18
Thanks everyone! I'm blown away by the support and really wasn't expecting this. Right, I'm off to barter for half a jerry can of unleaded.  --Al Overy
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10804Chris Keegan

"Excuse me, I seem to have lost my brother in the crowd, have you seen him?"
- "What does he look like?"

27/09/21 8:51:28

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17251Dave Bryan

''Who is the walrus?''

''I am the walrus.''
''I am the walrus.''
''I am the walrus.''
''I am the walrus.''
''I am the walrus.''
''I am the walrus.''

27/09/21 8:15:19

 3
It would be even better without the first line. --Molly R
James Lennox Vote score: 9475James Lennox

"Excuse me, excuse me, pardon me, coming through, excuse me, pardon me, coming through, excuse me..."

27/09/21 8:01:51

 
stone face Vote score: 10116stone face

"Oh shit!"

"What?"

"It's Attenborough again."

"What's he doing now?"

"Laying a trail of meat to entice that polar bear to attack us."

"The man has no morals."

"Utter bastard."

27/09/21 9:28:58

 1
Polar Bear: "What a kind and generous chap leaving this trail of meat for me to follow to a well stocked hunting ground" --Glyn Evans
Michael Winner Vote score: 25337Michael Winner

"Hi, are you here for the 'Assert Your Individuality' seminar too?"

27/09/21 8:39:01

 
Dot Old Vote score: 1605Dot Old

Wall to walrus

27/09/21 8:18:39

 3
Where's Wally? --Willie Johnson
Willie Johnson Vote score: 3218Willie Johnson

Sadly, hundreds were killed when someone yelled "POLAR BEAR" as a joke.

27/09/21 11:47:12

 
Steve Wright Vote score: 1854Steve Wright

Pete the dyslexic bricklayer was a bit surprised when he arrived at Walls R Us to pick up some materials.

27/09/21 10:38:51

 
Molly R Vote score: 3085Molly R

It's really hard to get to see a dentist these days.

27/09/21 8:28:51

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 19427Stephen Bean

On a sunbathing adventure with dad.

27/09/21 8:19:48

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 8764Hercules Rockefeller

"Goo goo goo joob."

27/09/21 8:01:11

 1
"I am the egg man..." Oops. I was the egg man. --Willie Johnson
Al Overy Vote score: 8295Al Overy

Where's Waly?

27/09/21 8:00:06

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5708Lucky Elperro

"Okay, just remember, it may be a thirty mile swim to the other side, but when we get there we're guaranteed a 4 star hotel and pocket money"

27/09/21 15:06:22

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5708Lucky Elperro

"There's a tourist with a camera, hide the cucumber sandwiches"

27/09/21 15:04:53

 
C CaMel Vote score: 7704C CaMel

My Father died here during a joke, they recovered his body but the breadsticks were never found.

27/09/21 8:57:47

 
GeeDee Vote score: 2967GeeDee

Ahh, you cant beat Blackpool in the height of the season

27/09/21 8:33:11

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12526Mr Dome

I haven't seen this many obese bodies on a beach since July at Blackpool

27/09/21 8:26:30

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 26248Ian Skelding

"Damn, why did I pick this place for a blind date meeting?"

27/09/21 8:19:30

 
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