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"Welcome to your electric shock aversion therapy session, Anon. So, everytime you say something pedantic or unnecessary, Ill apply a high voltage to..."  "Actually, youll find its not the voltage thats dangerous but the currAA...
"Welcome to your electric shock aversion therapy session, Anon. So, everytime you say something pedantic or unnecessary, Ill apply a high voltage to..."  "Actually, youll find its not the voltage thats dangerous but the currAA... photo | portfolio
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Al Overy Vote score: 7684Al Overy

"Welcome to your electric shock aversion therapy session, Anon. So, everytime you say something pedantic or unnecessary, I'll apply a high voltage to..."

"Actually, you'll find it's not the voltage that's dangerous but the currAAAAAAAAGH!"

02/09/21 13:33:38

 2
Haha, to avoid that, all you have to do is use your own name like meAAAAAAAAGH! --Willie Johnson
Ian Skelding Vote score: 26002Ian Skelding

Politicians in the mid-20th Century had to go through an annual brain cell reduction session, nowadays they just go through Eton.

02/09/21 12:53:39

 1
"Mummy, why is it that the homeless can't buy their own ponies?" --Glyn Evans
Michael Winner Vote score: 25176Michael Winner

(muffled speech) "...and you say that my asthma will be cured by spending just one hour in a vacuum?"

02/09/21 16:56:21

 2
Actually, you won't hear any speech at all because sound can't travel in a vaAAAAAAAAAGH! --James Lennox
stone face Vote score: 10013stone face

Donald Trump endorses the Covid 19 Home Breathinator. Invented by the My Pillow guy.

02/09/21 12:17:05

 1
And just as comfortable. --Willie Johnson
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12324Mr Dome

Doctor I really don't think your therapy is working and for the love of Christ talk to me directly and take that stupid helmet off

02/09/21 12:54:26

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3680Mark Wilson

"So what are your intentions for my daughter young man?"

02/09/21 17:51:43

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12324Mr Dome

So tell me Mr Jacobs, when did you first start feeling like you were always the subject of experiments?

02/09/21 12:52:52

 
C CaMel Vote score: 7450C CaMel

“Ok lads, we need to know if spacesuit farts can kill, you’ll probably want to flip a coin before you take your seats.”

02/09/21 12:30:02

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12324Mr Dome

Right - the experiment will begin when I sit on the whoopee cushion

02/09/21 12:27:07

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 16729Dave Bryan

''Whenever you speak the telephone gives me an electric shock.''

''I'll try and reverse the charges.''

02/09/21 12:24:01

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 6305Karyn Harrison

"You're having sexy thoughts about Marlene Dietrich. Is that right?"

"No, absolutely not! I was thinking about Josephine Baker."

02/09/21 12:21:27

 
John  Glover Vote score: 22009John Glover

"Damn, you haven't by any chance, got a shilling for the meter?"

02/09/21 21:35:25

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5681Kenny Ireland

"Yes. This is perfect. Could you deliver it to 10 Rillington Place please".

02/09/21 12:36:26

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5681Kenny Ireland

"You see Sir. I place the captioneer where you are and when I press this button it forces them to give a nod".

02/09/21 12:24:33

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12324Mr Dome

Boots were the pioneers of the tanning salon for the Victorian Gentleman, complete with deck chair for that authentic 'beach' experience

02/09/21 12:18:53

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 12167Neil Mackenzie

So we take men with dirty minds, pop them in the brain washing machine, but we must remember not to make their head’s spin.

02/09/21 17:33:13

 
C CaMel Vote score: 7450C CaMel

Rees-Mogg Methane Ltd announces record profits.

02/09/21 14:15:50

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1388alexandra ball

Hairdryer, facials and massage all in one go. This will really catch on.

02/09/21 13:10:34

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 18732Stephen Bean

Captain Jack Harkness tries out what life might be like as the Face of Boe.

02/09/21 12:39:35

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 6305Karyn Harrison

"All done. Those pesky head lice won't be bothering you any more."

02/09/21 12:33:02

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 2153Karen Oakenfull

Treatment for dandruff has come a long way since the early 1920’s.

02/09/21 12:26:40

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12324Mr Dome

It was not easy being a gimp in the 50s

02/09/21 12:22:06

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 4032Scrijjy Doo

The first blow job went horribly wrong.

02/09/21 12:17:52

 1
If at first you don't succeed try, try and try again. --Willie Johnson
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5554Lucky Elperro

"This is amazing, what are you calling them again?"

"On-ear headphones"

02/09/21 12:08:17

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 18732Stephen Bean

"It's no good. I still can't think of a caption."

02/09/21 12:05:07

 
C CaMel Vote score: 7450C CaMel

“Yes I can hear you now but if you take this ‘telephone’ off I can hear you even better.”

02/09/21 12:03:06

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 18732Stephen Bean

"I've always wanted to do this. It's on my bucket list."

02/09/21 12:02:01

 
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