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Vanessa the Guesser	clever Predictive text 01/08/21 8:16:42	17

Karen Oakenfull	“My son, did you just shout out you were looking for Jehovah?” “No mate, I said, f*cking move over.” 01/08/21 8:11:21	9

Dave Bryan	''Sinner repent! Destroy those dreadful old captions you've been using for the last ten years and write some new ones. God is waiting.'' ''How will I recognise him?'' 01/08/21 8:19:47	3 7
How could you? I always thought you couldn't look upon God's face without bursting into flames. It'd be like dating a Gorgon, but at least with a Gorgon you'd get stoned before timing out. --Glyn Evans
James Lennox	"It's spelt 'Nigh', Moses. Thank God you're not in charge of writing any serious scripture." 01/08/21 8:14:19	1 4
"Silly me, I thought it was spelled 'end'." --Willie Johnson
Stephen Bean	The other side reads: THE START IS FAR! 01/08/21 8:03:40	4

Al Overy	As a retired cardiologist, Dennis could spot a heart attack coming a mile off. 01/08/21 8:01:29	4

Nina Dutton	“Good, because I couldn’t manage another mile.” 01/08/21 8:00:31	4

Ian Skelding	"Armageddon close now." 01/08/21 9:03:12	2

Al Overy	"Nigh five!" 01/08/21 8:00:47	2

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