lol x2

"I'm sorry luv, but Noah said I'm only allowed to bring one, and Nancy's got better tits."

06/04/21 12:26:41

clever

''I can't understand why you worry so much about pandemics. We're always the first to get the vaccine.''

06/04/21 12:32:19

"OK, you're safe now. Tell me, where did David Attenborough touch you?"

06/04/21 12:08:17

"Cheer up, we'll get you another typewriter."

06/04/21 19:07:36

"I don't mean to pry mate, but are you feeling ok?"

06/04/21 12:06:20

"Yeah, they'll all be back gawping at us on the 12th but you will be able to increase your car badge collection."

06/04/21 19:01:37

"I know, it's a shock that Davy is married with a child, but I think Peter Tork is still single."

06/04/21 16:31:11

"It's okay, those windscreen wipers can be tricky to rip off sometimes"

06/04/21 12:38:25

Don't worry son in our lives we will get called all sorts from monkeys to baboons even orangutans but they are caption writers and don't know any better.

06/04/21 12:13:30

"Sweetheart, I know it's depressing. They got their big break with the book deal, and now a movie. We all see it's just derivative dreck. Gorillas in the Pissed, more like.. am I right? .. Listen.. of course it's going to be tough, but don't lose hope. Just keep honing your craft, going to auditions, your time will come. I promise."

06/04/21 13:48:58

"Don't worry about captioneers being sick of the sight of us, we have our own capuchineers."

06/04/21 13:05:00

"Don't worry, you're in your prime mate."

06/04/21 12:20:46

"Did you see the terrible thing that happened to Speak no Evil?"

06/04/21 12:12:47

No darling, not that kind of swinging...

06/04/21 12:00:20

Hi.... John your wife's Dead.
And..... I think we may have probably deffently ate her.

06/04/21 23:48:44

“It’s okay not to be okay, but the reason I bit your tail off is because you stole my mango.”

06/04/21 14:29:21

"It's ok, I know what the organ grinder did."

06/04/21 12:43:49

PMT of the Apes

06/04/21 12:25:28

"Do you know Jesus?"

06/04/21 12:20:36

Its ok lockdown will soon be over the zoo will reopen and we can go back in our cage.

06/04/21 12:18:43

''I feel ill.''

''Have you been reading monkey captions again?''

06/04/21 12:08:20

Don’t worry I know you’ve never seen a door mirror before, but sooner or later the boxes on wheels will return.

06/04/21 21:06:09

"When you get into the ring, remember he's fast on his feet so no monkey business"

06/04/21 20:13:06

"There'll come a time in the future when I shan't mind about this anymore, when I can look back and say quite peacefully and cheerfully how silly I was. No, no, I don't want that time to come ever. I want to remember every minute, always, always to the end of my days. And then throw my poo at that kid in the blue T shirt."

06/04/21 17:45:41

"...but lots of animals have sticky-out ears".

06/04/21 15:56:06

Never mind,Elma, there's Plenty More Monkeys in the Forest....

06/04/21 13:54:34

'sigh' listen dude, just quit it with the bloody Gangnam Style!

06/04/21 12:48:19

"We tried our best but couldn't rhesuscitate him."

06/04/21 12:34:21

Such a sporting gesture as the winner commiserates with the runner up in the Sooty look alike contest.

06/04/21 12:34:06

"I'm sorry that I can't move my left hand. It's stuck to your shoulder. I think that guy said it was soup or goo. He said it was always funny. I'll show him funny as soon as I can get free."

06/04/21 12:31:13

"I feel a bit of a nit "

06/04/21 12:21:20

"Don't worry, I'm sure someone will come up with it, it's just that the nit picking pun has been done so many times."

06/04/21 12:14:37

Monkey see, monkey try to do.

06/04/21 12:12:55

" Darling, It's just called Doggy Fashion, it doesn't mean you have to bark during intercourse."

06/04/21 12:09:15

Too much monkey business.

06/04/21 12:09:02

But you said you'd love a golden shower

06/04/21 12:08:52

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be so ticked off with you earlier."

06/04/21 12:06:16

"I'm afraid it's true. Once you hit puberty, you're going to get a gigantic blue arse."

06/04/21 12:06:15

"I know. The park's been shut for so long, you've almost forgotten how to fling sh*t at people. I'm exactly the same!"

06/04/21 12:03:07

Flea G Tips

06/04/21 12:00:47

"I told you to never make eye contact when eating your banana."

06/04/21 12:00:22

"It's OK mate, it's not jaundice, it's our natural colour."

06/04/21 12:00:12