lol

This little piggy stayed home.
And this little piggy stayed home.
And this little piggy stayed home.
And this little piggy stayed home.
And this little piggy went wee wee wee but still stayed home.

Tue 20:01:30

"Best out of five? - You're not very good at this arm wrestling, Doc"

Tue 20:00:32

Yes Mrs Smith after a detailed examination he seems fine but what would I know I'm a butcher.

Tue 20:05:42

"Touch it again and I'll break your fucking thumb!"

Tue 20:59:36

And the winner of "Who has got the fewest teeth?" is...

Tue 20:00:48

"Welcome to the Masons."

Tue 21:08:19

Poor orphan boy I'll be looking after you for a while. I'm Doctor Foster

Tue 20:04:40

lol

''Take two paracetamol and piss off.''

Tue 20:22:18

"It's ok son. You're male. We've all got one"

Tue 20:06:42

"Hey, doc, would you mind putting your mask back on?"

Tue 20:05:20

"I've got reflux, constipation and a nasty little rash, Doc."

"I'm sorry to hear that young man, but this is the butcher's."

Tue 20:00:13

"While you're pissing about checking my pulse can I have a newspaper to read?"

Tue 20:00:09

"Doc, I can't stop pissing my pants when I don't want to"

"Me too".

Tue 23:18:39

"Well done Doc - that's my arse and that's my elbow. I knew you'd get there eventually"

Tue 21:53:49

"One day Jimmy you'll be famous ... nurse, tell Mrs Savile I have finished her son's examination."

Tue 21:52:51

"Excuse me, what the hell do you think you're doing? Put my son's pants back on and examine my dog. You Vets charge a fortune"

Tue 20:51:24

"Dave, that Doctor is incompetent and I'm never taking our child there again. He said 'Your daughter is fine'..."

Tue 20:46:57

Most kids are scared of me.
You're not that ugly and repulsive.
I actually meant the white coat.

Tue 20:20:43

"It's working. Those stupid captioneers haven't realised yet. My evil plan to replace cats with toddlers...Hahahaha"

Tue 20:04:58

Doctor:- Laughter is the best medicine
A young John McEnroe:- You cannot be serious!

Wed 8:42:08

"Your BMI is high and without immediate action will lead to obesity-related medical problem like diabetes or heart disease"

Tue 23:40:18

"There's no easy way of saying this, me and your Mum are splitting up and it's all your fault. Since she give birth to you the sex is like throwing a sausage down a tunnel"

Tue 23:29:15

Show me your men's Tena pants and I'll show you my Pampers.

Tue 23:16:36

Doctor Where

Tue 21:40:36

Doctor Frankenstein's monster fools everyone by disguising the bolt through his neck.

Tue 20:57:19

"If you think you're in pain now you little git, then check this out. THIS is called a Chinese burn..."

Tue 20:57:18

"That pile of dingo shit I left in your place should throw the cops off the scent."

Tue 20:56:33

"Watch how I can whistle and talk at the same time."
"Watch how I can poop and throw up at the same time."
"WE'RE THROUGH HERE, YOU CAN COME GET YOUR BABY NOW."
"You really can talk and whistle at the same time."
"I wish I didn't have to inhale just then."

Tue 20:33:46

"Excellent attempt, but remember, it's 'paed-I-A-TRI-CIAN' not 'paed-O-PHILE', try again..."

Tue 20:26:13

"We'll just tell your Mum one of your friends drew three tadpoles with a black marker pen Damien."

Tue 20:25:42

Research on white mice can only get you so far.

Tue 20:23:25

"Yeah, they checked me during prenatal, you need a nip round to predental."

Tue 20:17:35

Titch doctor

Tue 20:14:02

Dave remembered when the ladies used to refer to him as 'the baby's arm'.

Tue 20:10:27