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The Wolf Vote score: 10784The Wolf

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08/02/21 8:38:32

 1
We don't allow any image altered using PhotoClot --Mauris Iocus
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

"I don't know why my girlfriend smacked me in the face. I didn't forget Valentine's Day. I got her a sack of charcoal and some screen wash on my way home."

08/02/21 8:01:11

 1
But surely she should be grateful for what she has...even if she isn't an artist or doesn't have a car. Maybe she'd prefer what I do for my girlfriend - I sacrifice a goat in her honour which usually appeases her. --Glyn Evans
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24006Ian Skelding

"Wibble."

08/02/21 8:06:38

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14258Vanessa the Guesser

Medical students celebrate Rag Week

08/02/21 8:22:10

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

It was the sixth round, and unable to stop his nose bleed using tampons. His trainer shouted to throw in the towel.

08/02/21 8:28:42

 1
The only fight this character's in, would be his battle with gender confusion... and he appears to be down for the count. --Mauris Iocus
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14258Vanessa the Guesser

Period drama

08/02/21 8:19:17

 
James Lennox Vote score: 7587James Lennox

Everyone remembers the feeding the masses, and the rising from the dead, but this was actually Jesus's best party trick.

08/02/21 8:13:26

 1
Always --Glyn Evans
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Having declared himself non-binary, Brian was still trying to come to terms with his female side.

08/02/21 8:12:55

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13165Dave Bryan

He always acts strange when there's a full moon. It's the time of month.

08/02/21 8:04:26

 1
Leave the moon alone, it's not the moon's fault that he acts as he does. Sounds like an all too convenient excuse to plead for insanity. The moon made me do it, religion made me do it, extremist beliefs made me do it. Yawn.  --Glyn Evans
The Wolf Vote score: 10784The Wolf

This is the polite way of telling someone with a nose ring that they look like a bloody tw*t

08/02/21 8:01:08

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

Bloody sinuses!

08/02/21 8:00:24

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 860Charles Gilbert

Nostrildumbass.

08/02/21 19:36:37

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2436Mark Wilson

Shhh ... you had me at hello

08/02/21 12:07:16

 1
Didn't need that last "o" --Mauris Iocus
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

At his trial he pleaded in sanitary..

08/02/21 8:25:32

 1
If he has a leaky nose maybe he's also got a leaky brain --Glyn Evans
James Lennox Vote score: 7587James Lennox

Dave had clearly stuck his nose somewhere it didn't belong.

08/02/21 8:09:56

 1
I did give the Daves plenty of warning but they were too busy being Daves --Glyn Evans
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14629Stephen Bean

♫ I am the Walrus, goo goo g'joob ♫

08/02/21 8:00:12

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5281Kenny Ireland

Steve's nose was Allways stuffed.

08/02/21 12:18:48

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3230Scrijjy Doo

Noseferatu

08/02/21 11:42:47

 
The Wolf Vote score: 10784The Wolf

You see? Make sanitary products free in Scotland and this is what happens. Cruel and unfair job interviews.

08/02/21 8:34:39

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15594Dan Nicholls

Ex-Men

08/02/21 8:25:38

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7636Hercules Rockefeller

"You really weren't kidding when you said your seat was in the nosebleed section."

08/02/21 8:04:38

 
The Wolf Vote score: 10784The Wolf

"Is this really necessary Doctor? I'm only having my toenail removed"

08/02/21 8:02:19

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

That's not the way to use tampons.Period.

08/02/21 8:02:18

 
tam betts tam betts

Snotting like a bitch

11/02/21 22:13:54

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 4455Crunchy Chords

"I'm pleased with my nose job. (There's a bit of bleeding, to which I found a clever solution.) But I'm particularly proud of my right-left hand swap surgery."

08/02/21 15:48:22

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21297John Glover

Ah, that would explain the handerkerchief up his arse.

08/02/21 13:56:22

 1
Happy to see they're updating Morris Dancing. --Mauris Iocus
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5031Lucky Elperro

I'm going to sit here with these up my nose until I think of a really side splitting caption, said Tristan, aged four.

08/02/21 13:30:14

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

Poonis Envy

08/02/21 10:36:49

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11081Mr Dome

As soon as Dave turned back round from sneezing, the nurse was ready for him

08/02/21 10:21:00

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33414Tony Edwards

Dave thinks that his new girlfriend is dynamite.

08/02/21 10:16:30

 3
Everyone's going with Karen these days, but I think his female medical assistant is Asian, named Tammy Pong. --Mauris Iocus
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 657Ellen Duncalf

Heavy period.

08/02/21 10:09:50

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7533Glyn Evans

Men have to put them somewhere. Male period poverty really is a thing.

08/02/21 9:48:31

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10304Chris Keegan

Marks wife is a nurse. Today she asked him why he doesn't help around the house when she's working to which Mark replied f*ck knows. So she did.

08/02/21 9:31:17

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

World’s Most Annoying Man!

Learn the secrets.

Watch the developing skills in..

“Russell Brand : The Early Years”

08/02/21 9:18:52

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

Mutt Plugs

08/02/21 9:17:57

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

Labio

08/02/21 9:17:39

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

Camp-Ons

08/02/21 9:16:59

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

New Eco Dual Purpose PCR Covid test.


[8:23:56 You Go Girl!]

08/02/21 9:16:34

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

String Queery

08/02/21 9:16:09

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2344Willie Johnson

"You're holding up two fingers. Can we move on to something more challenging?"

08/02/21 9:12:34

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 990alexandra ball

She's getting right up my nose!

08/02/21 8:54:57

 1
That's the last time we try face-sitting. --Mauris Iocus
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11495Neil Mackenzie

Now you can wear your mask with your nose sticking out. If you’re going to be a twat you might as well look like one.

08/02/21 8:36:39

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24006Ian Skelding

"He did it for a Tena."

08/02/21 8:33:56

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24006Ian Skelding

Tam packs his nose.

08/02/21 8:29:51

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13165Dave Bryan

Scientists claim new Covid safety measure is more effective than wearing a mask.

08/02/21 8:26:24

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15594Dan Nicholls

♫ "It's my wife". ♫

08/02/21 8:26:18

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15594Dan Nicholls

"Steve, have you got a minute? I need to pick your brains about something".

08/02/21 8:24:09

 
Tony S Vote score: 678Tony S

Never let a feminist do your covid nasal test

08/02/21 8:23:56

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14629Stephen Bean

"What's up Doc?"

08/02/21 8:19:19

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Mens true hate..

08/02/21 8:14:38

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7139Vivvy En

"Don't forget your handkerchief AGAIN!"

08/02/21 8:10:48

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Transplanting a clitoris into the nasal passages, so everytime Davey sneezed he had an orgasm, did come with unforseen problems.

08/02/21 8:08:44

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

When you're from Southampton and Man Utd are playing at home.

08/02/21 8:00:12

 
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