"Alas, poor Yaris!"

07/10/20 7:25:36

On reflection Micky realised a windscreen wiper would have made a better back scratcher.

07/10/20 7:18:14

Bubbles still fears the Man in the Mirror.

07/10/20 7:17:46

"Oh my God, the top of my head looks like a Viennese Whirl."

07/10/20 7:59:32

"What's it saying, my precious, my love? Is Anon losing his nerve?"
"No! Not! Never! Anon hates nasty captioneerses! Anon wants to see them… dead!"
"It's ours! Ours! We must get the Precious £50! We must get It!"
"Patience! Patience, my love. First we must lead them to her."
She's always hungry. She always needs to feed."
She hungers for sweeter meats. Captioneer meat. And when she throws away the bones and empty clothes, then we will find It!"
"And take it for me!"
"For us."
"Yes, we meant, we meant for us."

07/10/20 7:06:38

"My sight's good even after all that organ grinding."

07/10/20 7:06:24

"See darling! I told you driving through the monkey enclosure at 60 mph, would stop the little bastards ruining my new Lexus."

07/10/20 7:04:13

After having a short, back and sides, Milo was very happy with the result and couldn’t stop looking at himself. He was then asked, “Something for the weekend Sir?” Milo replied, “You haven’t got a lawnmower I could borrow have yer?” The barber said no but gave him a pack of mint flavoured condoms anyway, which he ate on the way home.

(Old Mick Miller jokes sneaked in there ;D)

07/10/20 16:26:25

CAUTION. Please be aware that the wing mirrors in this enclosure may steal your monkeys.

07/10/20 8:05:03

"Oh no, Is that a grey hair?"

07/10/20 7:58:59

''I look quite old in the mirror.''

''Don't worry , you're still in your prime, mate.''

07/10/20 7:08:45

"It makes no sense, how does this coconut work?"

07/10/20 7:05:49

Audi fit in there?

07/10/20 8:30:38

Oh my gosh! Them chicks are right. I really do have a monobrow and it’s not a good look.

07/10/20 8:28:42

'Cor...he's handsome'

07/10/20 8:13:38

She nicked the door mirror so she could adore herself.

07/10/20 7:37:03

''Anything the matter, Jane?''

''Yes, I only trimmed my beard three days ago.''

07/10/20 7:21:53

So that's the f*cking thief who stole my wing mirror

07/10/20 7:11:10

"Oh no - I'm going thin on top."

07/10/20 7:07:53

"I see a lot of myself in you."

07/10/20 7:03:13

♫ I'm starting with the monkey in the mirror. I'm asking him to change his ways. ♫

07/10/20 7:01:54

Objects in mirror are closer than they appear...

"Oh shit. Bonzo is on heat..."

07/10/20 7:00:53

"Mirror, mirror, who is the furriest of them all?"

07/10/20 7:00:06

This time, I am going to find a mate

22/10/20 11:31:29

'Brad Pitt, eat your heart out!'

07/10/20 16:08:13

I chimpansee myself.

07/10/20 13:51:34

"Who shaved macaque?"

07/10/20 13:12:13

The Barbary of Seville

07/10/20 13:05:35

Malice through the looking glass

07/10/20 12:11:21

"Perfect wing mirror, only four bananas, perfect wing mirror, only four bananas, last one left!"
"What's he up to now?"
"Oh you know Dave, he's always up to some sort of monkey business."

07/10/20 11:07:22

Souvenir hunter

07/10/20 9:02:42

A Groom with a View

07/10/20 8:36:12

"Well life in the safari park can be dull and boring, but it does have its fringe benefits."

07/10/20 7:02:12