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The Wolf Vote score: 21274The Wolf

Dear Santa. For Christmas this year I'd love some thermal underpants.

05/10/20 19:27:23

Stephen Bean Vote score: 34953Stephen Bean

Meat and blue veg

05/10/20 19:19:54

Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 9676Scrijjy Doo

"My eyes are up here!"

05/10/20 19:21:17

Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 12478Hercules Rockefeller

"They're only like that because self pleasure is against my religion."

05/10/20 19:06:13

Molly R Vote score: 4218Molly R

It says "Dear John, I'm afraid I may have given you an infection."

05/10/20 19:03:13

Stephen Bean Vote score: 34953Stephen Bean

Spot the ball competition for beginners.

05/10/20 19:04:55

Stephen Bean Vote score: 34953Stephen Bean

I warned him not to spend too long thinking about captions.

05/10/20 19:00:49

Ron  Allan Vote score: 5548Ron Allan

"You total pillock're supposed to swallow the bloody Viagra, not rub it on your genitals"

05/10/20 23:18:25

Lucky Elperro Vote score: 6316Lucky Elperro

"You dipped them in cryo-what?"

05/10/20 20:04:39

John  Glover Vote score: 23175John Glover

"I wasn't thinking sexy thoughts, I didn't realise it was erect, it just came out of the blue."

05/10/20 19:27:11

Ian Skelding Vote score: 31945Ian Skelding

"Would you mind where you're aiming that laser pen."

05/10/20 19:16:43

Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 1410Ellen Duncalf

Kelvin is not impressed with the latest idea of paintballing for enrichment during lock down. "Those chimps are evil" he said in an interview earlier today at Monkeyworld in Dorset.

05/10/20 19:10:43

Crunchy Chords Vote score: 7923Crunchy Chords

"Darling, have you ever heard of the term 'blue balls'?"
"You mean the idea that aroused males get blue testicles if they're not able to, well, finish? Yeah, but it's a myth, innit. Why do you ask?"

05/10/20 19:00:35

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