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Before the days of captioneering.
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Tony Edwards Vote score: 32490Tony Edwards

Before the days of captioneering.

07/09/20 12:31:42

 1
BC --Dave Bryan
The Wolf Vote score: 7914The Wolf

"What's on the box tonight darling?"

"I'm not sure. I think it's a picture of your brother"

07/09/20 12:13:39

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22884Ian Skelding

"A drama set in farmland? Ha ha, I'll give it three weeks, what's it called?"
"I think it's called The Archers."

07/09/20 12:12:26

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7914The Wolf

"Oh well, at least we have the air raid to look forward to"

07/09/20 12:29:51

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11267Dave Bryan

''The British forces destroyed sixteen enemy ships and shot down twenty eight enemy aircraft. We suffered no casualties.''

''Do you believe this bullshit, mummy?''

07/09/20 12:36:20

 
Mark England Vote score: 17338Mark England

"I can't stand another night of this" thought John Logie Baird, as he sat through Listen With Mother again

07/09/20 12:30:01

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1698Karen Oakenfull

“Mummy, now that dad’s on leave from the Army, let’s listen to the afternoon play that you and uncle Bob from next door usually listen to.”

07/09/20 13:59:08

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23472Michael Winner

In the olden days, if you strayed too far from your microwave you could catch rickets.

{citation needed}

07/09/20 12:53:25

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7914The Wolf

*And welcome to Golden Oldies, your wartime classic comedy show. A mannequin walks into a bar with a cat and gets super glued to Gulliver's nipple. 'How will I recognise you?', Dave asked..*

"Wow guys, Isn't this groundbreaking stuff?"

"No, I've heard it"

07/09/20 12:28:13

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4458Stu Dent

Radio Times

07/09/20 12:05:15

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7914The Wolf

Time travelling diary. Day 1.

After making it back to the 1940s, I hid the time machine and checked into a local guesthouse. The ladies there were incredible friendly and accommodating. Reality soon kicked in though when I wanted to check Instagram and I asked them if they had wireless...

07/09/20 12:00:57

 1
Time Travelling Diary Day 2.I appear to have killed everyone by infecting them with Covid-19. --Michael Winner
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11267Dave Bryan

''We shall fight Anon on the beaches......''

07/09/20 12:00:47

 2
That would be anon fight. --Willie Johnson
Sheila  Graham Vote score: 151Sheila Graham

With the family distracted, the rare and deadly child-eating butterfly moved in for the attack.

07/09/20 18:13:28

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5913C CaMel

"I hope they invent TV soon."

07/09/20 15:22:37

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7914The Wolf

"Dad, dressing the family in old clothes and turning your iPhone camera to black and white mode doesn't make this any less embarrassing. Just pay for a bloody TV licence..."

07/09/20 12:41:42

 
Mark England Vote score: 17338Mark England

"...and then Lady Chatterly quivered in anticipation when Mellors whipped out his penis..."

07/09/20 12:08:30

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15283Dan Nicholls

Wireless. Just like Auntie Viv's bra.

07/09/20 12:02:19

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11267Dave Bryan

''Mummy, when the f-ck are they going to invent the internet?''

07/09/20 12:02:11

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20846John Glover

"Gosh, that Wilfred Pickles had on Mabel's Table, £2 13s 6d, two jars of Strawberry jam, a pair of linen handkerchiefs and a large marrow. How on earth could they afford to give all that away as one prize?"

08/09/20 2:19:43

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10988Neil Mackenzie

We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets...we shall never surrender. What the EU won’t give us a deal, where’s that white flag.

07/09/20 21:02:48

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5913C CaMel

"What's this you circled in the schedule Tim, Babestation?"

07/09/20 16:12:20

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5913C CaMel

"Dad, you won't need to fart songs anymore."
"Technology is ruining family time already."

07/09/20 15:53:44

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11713Stephen Bean

"Mummy these programmes are so boring it hertz."

07/09/20 13:26:12

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23472Michael Winner

"This is the BBC Home Service with Dogging Hour."

07/09/20 12:51:48

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23472Michael Winner

"I wish they'd hurry up and invent Minecraft."

07/09/20 12:49:00

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11267Dave Bryan

''Because you've been such a good girl, Sandra, you can switch it on today.''

07/09/20 12:04:43

 
Al Overy Vote score: 1311Al Overy

"That was the news from the front line. Next up, the ships with bullets in. Sorry, the Shipping Bulletin"

07/09/20 20:22:20

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 681alexandra ball

The family gathered to hear this new invention so after hours someone decided to switch it on.

07/09/20 19:22:58

 
Red Guy Vote score: 328Red Guy

Russian family listening to the radio, June 2020

07/09/20 18:10:24

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2658Scrijjy Doo

The BBC has come a long way.

07/09/20 15:35:39

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2658Scrijjy Doo

Who needs TV when we have daddy touching us inappropriately?

07/09/20 15:34:48

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2658Scrijjy Doo

What's so great about the depression?

07/09/20 15:33:54

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1791Willie Johnson

A family struggles to come up with a caption as the radio describes the picture only once.

07/09/20 13:52:47

 1
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11713Stephen Bean

*Sounds of death rays and people screaming* "Our planet has been invaded..."

"Mummy, Mr Orson Welles made me pee my pants."
"Me too darling, me too."

07/09/20 13:48:16

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22884Ian Skelding

"I much prefer Vera Lynn to that awful Judy Garland," said the Wicked Witch of the West.

07/09/20 13:38:51

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22884Ian Skelding

The Hoffman family were delighted to hear that new techniques on rhinoplasty had been introduced.

07/09/20 13:34:54

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23472Michael Winner

The family's love of loud radio and clog dancing was the main reason there was no second Diary of Anne Frank.

07/09/20 12:57:20

 2
No takers for my utterly tasteless and offensive caption then. Shame on me, and well done everyone with taste and restraint. I'm still not apologising though. --Michael Winner
Rachel P Vote score: 2297Rachel P

Listening this week on Let's Pretend are The Wizard, The Wicked Witch of the West, Dorothy and The Cowardly Lion

07/09/20 12:43:40

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11267Dave Bryan

''Now you can have The Goons right in your living room.''

07/09/20 12:15:36

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9278Chris Keegan

I do think it's quite remarkable how Tony Blackburn has retained his listening figures over the years.

07/09/20 12:08:10

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13037Vanessa the Guesser

We just weren't on the same wavelength.

07/09/20 12:07:30

 
Molly R Vote score: 2045Molly R

"Now you see, darling, this is how Grandad gets his rocks off. It's your turn to sit here next."

07/09/20 12:04:59

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9278Chris Keegan

During the early days of Radio 4 some thought it referred to the listening requirements.

07/09/20 12:01:35

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15283Dan Nicholls

Watch F*ck All With Mother.

07/09/20 12:01:34

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11713Stephen Bean

Fam Radio

07/09/20 12:00:31

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9278Chris Keegan

Virgin Radio

07/09/20 12:00:08

 
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