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"Ill be there in a Jiffy."
"Ill be there in a Jiffy." photo | portfolio
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"I'll be there in a Jiffy."

Sat 20:05:51

 

"It's pithing down again."

Sat 20:19:31

 

He's on the run from the peelers.

Sun 9:03:50

 

Lemon drizzle

Sat 20:00:10

 

Donald Trump admits to taking both hydroxychloroquine and vitamin C.

Sun 2:24:49

 1
Is that because of his inpeachment? --Mr Dome

"How could you know the fun runner committed the crime, Holmes?"
"A lemon entry, Watson, a lemon entry."

Sat 21:49:38

 

'I picked the wrong day to show a bitter leg,' thought Jack.

Sat 20:26:44

 

Where did that man go

Sat 20:00:27

 

dominic cummings trying to hide from the press during lockdown

Sun 17:41:48

 

I see that vital PPE from Turkey has eventually arrived then

Sun 16:29:12

 

"Oh no! If I'm late for work again I'll get canned."

Sat 21:37:23

 

Dominic Cummings spotted at his parents home yet again

Sat 21:12:29

 

All of a sudden there was a peel of thunder.

Sat 20:50:36

 

It never rains but it pawpaws

Sat 20:23:15

 

James and the giant peach

Sat 20:03:46

 1
It used to be giant but now he's grown up and can carry it around. --Willie Johnson

Keith Lemon

Sat 20:01:23

 

fruit on a loon

Sat 20:00:09

 

Even in the torrential rain, Pavarotti's old orange t-shirt refused to shrink

Sun 15:25:43

 

My car's been stolen. Now someone's just taking the pith ...

Sun 15:18:31

 

Chicken McNuggets delivery resumes in Manchester.

Sun 12:21:04

 

As i walked every car that went past sounded their horn, that's right they all Tutti Frutti

Sun 8:52:11

 

"Excuse me sir, where are you heading to?"

"The Fool's Garden!"

Sun 7:10:51

 

As the problem of PPE continued, many consultants continued to improvise.

Sun 2:21:35

 

An entomologist's wet dream.

(I could tell or you could look it up like I had to).

Sun 2:19:35

 

Dave is a big fruit.

Sun 1:39:05

 

Peach snaps

Sun 0:47:08

 

Les was beginning to have doubts about joining the Masons.

Sat 23:19:27

 

Notting Hill Gate Carnival 2020.

Sat 23:15:47

 

"No, what I said was let's ARRANGE a meeting in the park!!!"

Sat 23:13:02

 

Lemon tree

Sat 22:37:15

 

“ Oh ....... he told me he had a massive pear...”

Sat 21:58:00

 

Cars kept pippin at him.

Sat 21:51:29

 

"..anyway, so there I was, miles from home, no money, dressed as a lemon and carrying a rucksack full of broccoli and then if it couldn't get any worse, the heavens opened.."

Sat 21:48:43

 

His car had broken down but he would get to the fancy dress party kumquat may.

Sat 21:48:41

 

He was introjuiced to me as Dave.

Sat 21:45:22

 

He was a passion fruit but he couldn’t get a date.

Sat 21:44:27

 

The girls didn’t find him a peeling.

Sat 21:38:23

 

Only a bloke would wear those shoes with that outfit...

Sat 21:21:34

 

Let it go. If it gets up and walks away, it probably wasn't good to eat anyway.

Sat 21:17:17

 

Lemon drops

Sat 21:06:28

 

The rain of Julius Squeezer

Sat 20:54:44

 

Son of a peach! This is the pits.

Sat 20:54:43

 1

Son of a peach! This is the pits.

* Well, rather than delete this duplicate, why don't I complain about the jackhammering going on next door, or brag about my lightning fast reflexes to be able to write and post two identical captions within the same second.

Sat 20:54:43

 1

At least the red Nikes provide some pulp friction.

Sat 20:53:36

 

"This outfit's giving me a wedgie."

Sat 20:49:55

 

Dave was looking forward to an ice soak with a gin

Sat 20:47:45

 

Colin suggested to his mates that they went to the fancy dress party as the ingredients of something for a birthday party. He always was a bit of a fruit cake.

Sat 20:41:31

 

"Phwoar, he's one hot lemon!"

Sat 20:40:22

 

"I must be getting a cold."

Sat 20:38:09

 

''This bloody rain is giving me the pip.''

Sat 20:36:24

 

His sister's a lemon tart.

Sat 20:35:48

 

Dave enjoyed being on his own. Unlike other lemons, he wasn't a mixer.

Sat 20:34:18

 

Acid rain

Sat 20:33:05

 

I'm ready for several drinks.

Sat 20:31:33

 

"Always wash the ugli fruit."

Sat 20:27:23

 

Dave arriving early for the Citrus Pride lemonstration.

Sat 20:20:36

 

Judge Rinder

Sat 20:20:33

 

Ironically, he was hit by a truck and ended up as flat as a pancake.

Sat 20:17:41

 

Adam?

Sat 20:17:34

 

El Mari-lychee

Sat 20:16:25

 

"Hail, yellow Mel wet!"

Sat 20:16:23

 

"Dave, the sign said cute girls on the BEACH!!!"

Sat 20:15:46

 

Juicy Couture

Sat 20:15:31

 

After his car broke down Dave begun the long walk homer.

Sat 20:14:16

 

Tropical storm

Sat 20:13:52

 

Apricoat

Sat 20:13:29

 

Peach Melbath

Sat 20:13:27

 

I bet he feels a right lemon.

Sat 20:13:16

 

It was crepe weather.

Sat 20:11:11

 

He's running out of juice.

Sat 20:09:12

 

"Sh*t! Om-lette for my meeting."

Sat 20:07:22

 

Squeezed for cash he's having to walk and it's making him bitter

Sat 20:04:50

 

Citrust fruit

Sat 20:04:20

 

He's just parking his Citron.

Sat 20:02:58

 

I started out as a strawberry.

Sat 20:01:52

 

Lemon aid

Sat 20:01:14

 
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