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Chris Keegan Vote score: 8880Chris Keegan

Prince Andrew denies all knowledge of this photo.

17/11/19 20:54:41

of course...he was only 6 months old then --Dev B
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4631Karyn Harrison

"What did I have for lunch? Well if you squeeze me a little bit harder I can show you!"

17/11/19 20:54:29

clever --Dev B
Stephen Bean Vote score: 10060Stephen Bean

Dave couldn't understand why his conjoined twin never seemed to get any older.

17/11/19 22:58:05

Vivvy En Vote score: 5927Vivvy En

"Excuse me, pint of lager please...and a couple of rusks for this toothless old git."

17/11/19 20:37:59

James Lennox Vote score: 5541James Lennox

"Yes, that'll do nicely waiter. Medium-rare please."

17/11/19 20:00:12

Dave Bryan Vote score: 9664Dave Bryan

Nappy hour

17/11/19 21:57:33

Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4473Lucky Elperro

At times Dave took his job as a bouncer at Mothercare a bit too seriously.

17/11/19 21:13:51

John  Glover Vote score: 20559John Glover

That's the last time Sid will ever enter a 'Big Surprise' raffle.

18/11/19 1:57:08

Dave Bryan Vote score: 9664Dave Bryan

''Where can I change him.......for a pint of beer?''

17/11/19 21:24:55

Willie Johnson Vote score: 1472Willie Johnson

"He needs a burp.
The alcohol on his breath is making me glassy eyed."

17/11/19 21:24:06

Stephen Bean Vote score: 10060Stephen Bean

Tot of the Pop

17/11/19 21:01:25

Paul Reeve Vote score: 5686Paul Reeve

This babysitting lark is a piece of piss thought Dave, then came the vomit.

17/11/19 20:58:10

The Wolf Vote score: 6992The Wolf

"Hello baby, goojie goojie goo"

"Goojie goojie goo? Are you f*cking serious? Listen pal, I've had a bad couple of weeks. My upbringing was a load of bollocks, this woman kept pushing me until I could finally breathe and then guess what, she sh*t on my head...and god knows why she puts her tits in my face. No wonder I'm always crying"

17/11/19 20:06:13

The Wolf Vote score: 6992The Wolf

"Ok mate, are you going to put me down? Or do I have to sh*t myself?"

17/11/19 20:00:28

Trace Sarge Vote score: 2539Trace Sarge

"If you don't put me down I will bite your other fingers off!"

18/11/19 19:16:24

Dev B Vote score: 645Dev B

Mumfart & Son

18/11/19 6:25:11

Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10679Neil Mackenzie

Oh look Paul’s dancing.

18/11/19 5:14:54

Generic RedHead Vote score: 682Generic RedHead

Seriously, who would trust someone with narcolepsy to look after their baby?

18/11/19 3:47:03

Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2259Scrijjy Doo

Forgive me father for I have--BAAAARFFFF!

17/11/19 23:46:31

Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

"Do they do kiddie portions?"


"Good, I can't eat a full one"

17/11/19 21:50:35

Mr Dome  Vote score: 9645Mr Dome

You dribble all the time, poop with no control, smell all the time and can't even walk! I don't see why people still love you grandad

17/11/19 21:26:15

Glyn Evans Vote score: 6575Glyn Evans

"Cor. You could do with some mints. Your breath is demonic" said the demonic baby.

17/11/19 21:11:36

Greg Curtis Vote score: 6125Greg Curtis

"Y'can't food ME. You are UNDERAGE, and I aught to throw you right out that door, and LOOK AT ME when I'm talking to you..."

17/11/19 20:45:13

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 12012Vanessa the Guesser

Nine months later, the waitress showed him what she'd done with his tip.

17/11/19 20:34:56

Ian Skelding Vote score: 22197Ian Skelding

Seedy baby

17/11/19 20:34:25

Ian Skelding Vote score: 22197Ian Skelding

Baby shambles

17/11/19 20:33:26

Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

The not yet Walking Dead

17/11/19 20:07:27

dave the rave Vote score: 272dave the rave

As you can see, all our daddy day care assistants here are well trained and fully competent.

17/11/19 20:00:07

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