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The tortoise and the hair.
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Glyn Evans Vote score: 5076Glyn Evans

The tortoise and the hair.

24/02/19 12:28:25

 
Dean Haigh Vote score: 37Dean Haigh

The years since Keith Harris's death had clearly taken their toll on Orville.

24/02/19 12:00:49

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 404Barrie Bullock

He's certainly come out of his shell lately.

24/02/19 14:15:11

 
John  Glover Vote score: 18352John Glover

That's the last time I buy tortoise food on line and from a company based in Chenobyl.

24/02/19 15:57:08

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 34299Welsh Rarebit

"We've named him Algaenon."

24/02/19 12:06:15

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 1292Stu Dent

Toupee Turtle

24/02/19 17:07:41

 
Mark England Vote score: 14246Mark England

Terrorpin

24/02/19 13:28:40

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 28390Tony Edwards

"You look turtley ridiculous!"

24/02/19 13:13:43

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 8855Neil Mackenzie

I bought it in a pet shop in Moss Side, Manchester.

24/02/19 13:07:50

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 535Spycenwolf

"Oh, no. He's let the weed go to his head."

24/02/19 12:36:12

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 535Spycenwolf

Well, that's how he looked in his 80s.

24/02/19 12:28:34

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 7238Vanessa the Guesser

Eddie Lizzard

24/02/19 12:04:42

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5259Hercules Rockefeller

"Honestly, Phil, you can't even tell it's a wig."

24/02/19 12:03:10

 
stone face Vote score: 3149stone face

Never mind the bollocks...This turtle actually breathes through its testicles( True).

24/02/19 12:37:02

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 1829Karyn Harrison

The last of the mohicans

24/02/19 12:32:47

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 5906Mr Dome

Poor Dave the Gremlin suffered from alopecia

24/02/19 12:11:58

 
Funny Bean Vote score: 1585Funny Bean

"Please stop staring at my chin. I bet your sexual organs look funny too."

24/02/19 12:03:16

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 34299Welsh Rarebit

Hairapin

24/02/19 12:00:07

 
Scrappy Doo Vote score: 445Scrappy Doo

Cut it out Lady Gaga!

25/02/19 5:56:13

 
larry G. Vote score: 1105larry G.

Chia pet.

24/02/19 23:15:12

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 1733Trace Sarge

"They say the pet looks like their owner...meet the wife's"

24/02/19 19:31:27

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 2920Dave Bryan

Turning turtle

24/02/19 18:41:52

 
Becky Walton Becky Walton

How do you like my new rock look 'WICKED' or what?

24/02/19 18:08:42

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 1829Karyn Harrison

We named him Leonardo after one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Inspired by 15:57:08

24/02/19 16:32:03

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 11786Dan Nicholls

Despite being 74, Keith from the Prodigy announces they are to tour yet again.

24/02/19 16:01:17

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 3687Vivvy En

I asked my Scottish hairdresser what product she was using to style me with and she said 'One guess algae ye'.

24/02/19 14:12:26

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 20004Ian Skelding

"They smell and they make a hell of a moss."

24/02/19 13:40:43

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 28390Tony Edwards

Extra-Terrorestrial

24/02/19 12:23:17

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 4528Chris Keegan

'Recently divorced fun loving hairdresser seeks sexy new partner for daytime adventures and cosy nights in'

24/02/19 12:15:29

 
Funny Bean Vote score: 1585Funny Bean

“Sorry, there's no call for oompa loompas in the film industry these days."

24/02/19 12:12:38

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5470Tosser Wivlov

I warned you not to sleep for so long.

24/02/19 12:11:06

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 1829Karyn Harrison

🎵 It was Christmas Eve babe
In the drunk tank
An old man said to me, won't see another one ...

24/02/19 12:01:48

 
Funny Bean Vote score: 1585Funny Bean

"Do you like my hair? I just dyed the roots."

24/02/19 12:00:20

 
Dean Haigh Vote score: 37Dean Haigh

Johnny 'Country Life Butter' Rotten was a turtle shell-out.

24/02/19 12:00:14

 
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